It's Almost Easy
by Mrs. Hedlund
Summary: Death Sentence FanFiction•Nicole wants Rachel to meet her boyfriend Joe, who happens to be the brother of a notorious gang lord. Rachel knows he isn’t someone she should be associating with, but her curiosity takes over.
1. Chapter 1

**R**achel stood looking down at her mother's grave. Just a week ago, she had said good bye to her for the last time. Rachel's mother was sick for many years and they had been expecting this, but it wasn't a good enough warning. Tears streamed down her emotionless face. She began to shake from the cool air that was starting to blow in. It was unusually cold for this time of year, but Rachel didn't care. She wanted her mother back to tell her everything was going to be alright.

"Sweetheart." Rachel's father stood next to her. His big arm wrapped around her shoulder. How she loved him. Rachel's brown eyes looked up at him. "We should get going. Our plane leaves in less than two hours." He spoke softly to his daughter. Rachel looked back down to her mother's headstone. It read: REBECCA LYNN PARKER- BELOVED MOTHER, DAUGHTER AND FRIEND-1962-2008.

"I have to go now Ma. I'll be back after schools over." She knelt down and kissed her fingers and rubbed them along her mother's name. She stood back up and walked away before she started to cry again. Her mother was dead, her house was sold and she was moving 3, ooo miles away from the only home she ever knew. Her father couldn't leave his job and move to LA so the only other option was for her to leave school and move to Boston. She had been to her father's house many times. She always loved it because his neighborhood was nice, but mostly because she knew she was always going back home.

"I'm so sorry about this Ray. This is breaking my heart but I don't know what else to do." Her father said, now headed to the airport.

"I know dad." Rachel said.

"I know you were looking forward to prom and graduation."

"That doesn't matter anymore. Those are trivial things now." What a lie. She couldn't believe she was going to miss prom and graduation. Only three months left of school and now she was moving. That saddened her more. But she didn't want her father to hurt anymore than he was, so she kept that to herself.

"Well you'll be able to go to prom and graduation at St. Theresa's. I know you have to be excited about seeing the girls again?" The girls he was referring to was Daniela, Brooke and Nicole. She had made friends with them when she was nine years old. Nicole lived across the street from her father and every visit she shared with her father she also shared with them. Every other holiday and three weeks every summer she spent at her father's house. Her mother and father were never married. They were best friends that got very close one night which resulted in her mother getting pregnant. Her father had already moved to Boston some time before for his job and had come back to LA to visit. They promised to raise Rachel together the best they could. Rachel knew that they loved each other but she also knew her father was _in love_ with her mother.

"Yeah, I'm looking forward to seeing them. I talked to them when I knew I was coming. They can't wait to see me either I guess." Rachel looked out the window. She missed her mother. She missed her hugs and her kisses. _Why did this have to happen?_ Rachel shut her eyes and started to drift to sleep.

_This is not what I wanted for you Rachel. Mommy loves you more than anything else in this world. Your father will take good care of you. You better be good to him. Be there for him and tell him I loved him._

Rachel's eyes shot open. She looked at her surroundings. _My father's car. _She thought. Suddenly she realized she was holding her breath. She let it out slowly through her mouth not alarm her father. Her breath was forced out faster than expected and her father turned his head to look at her.

"Ah, there she is. You fell asleep. Not a long nap but I guess it will do until we get home." Her father smiled at her. Home? She wasn't _going _home. She was _leaving_ home.

They pulled into the parking lot of the airport. They got out and took their luggage from the car. They walked into the airport and went to their terminal. They waited until it was time to board the plane. _Its time._ Rachel thought to herself. When they reached their seats on the plane Rachel closed her eyes. _Please let me go to sleep._ And that is exactly what she did.

When they arrived at the airport in Boston, Rachel's stomach began to turn. The nausea rose up her throat and burned it like fire. This was nothing new to her when she flew. Her father noticed the pale complexion of his daughter's face and handed her a bottle of water, she waved it away. She hadn't eaten anything that morning or the entire plane ride. Her appetite had diminished since her mother's death. She stopped walking suddenly, putting her fingers to her tightly closed mouth. Her eyes widened. She held her breath and begged for the feeling of letting out what little was in her stomach to stop. Her father walked to her and put his hand on her shoulder. He asked her if she was ok. Rachel squeezed her eyes shut and lightly shook her head yes. She put her other hand to her fathers face, silencing him from talking to her any further. _Please God, not here. Wait until I get to my father's house. Don't let me puke here in front of all these people._ She stood in that position for several seconds until the feeling subsided. Her eyes slowly opened and she pulled her hand away from her mouth. The hand that was placed in front of her father's face was now on her luggage. She took several deep breaths through her nose and let them slowly release out of her mouth.

"I can never get used to flying." She said in a cracked voice.

The ride to her father's house was quiet. The cab driver tried to talk to Rachel but she just shrugged him off. Her father apologized for her, stating that she was just jet lagged. Rachel wanted him to tell the cab driver the truth. '_My daughter doesn't want to talk to you or anyone else for that matter. She is trying to morn her mother's death. Does that mean anything to you annoying assholes?'_ Rachel laughed to herself, picturing her father being mean and using profanity. They pulled up to his oversized house and gathered their belongings. Rachel walked quickly up the walkway and stood at the front door as if someone was going to open it from the other side. "I can't open the door with you in the way Ray." Her father said in a soft voice. She looked back at him and rolled her eyes. He was so pathetic sometimes. She stepped aside and let her father open the door. She brushed past him and headed to her room. It was almost identical to the one back in LA. Her father wanted her to feel as much at home as possible while she visited.

"Rachel. I'm going to order food. Do you want pizza?" Her father yelled from downstairs. Rachel walked out of her room to the top of the stairs. She crossed her arms and looked down at her father.

"What?" He asked.

"Remember what we talked about the other day?"

"Can't you at least eat dinner with me first?" He pleaded.

"As long as you keep your promise, and don't try to trick me." She said uncrossing her arms and putting her hands in the back pockets of her jeans.

"As soon as you're done eating you can have the car and go see your friends. I already put you on the insurance so I won't be worrying completely."

"Fine then. Sure, pizza sounds good."

Her father smiled his handsome smile and walked into the kitchen. Rachel smiled to herself and walked back in her room. She picked up her phone and dialed.

"Hello."

"Hey Nicole. I'm here."

"Rachel?"

"Yup."

"Oh my God! How long have you been home?"

"Maybe twenty minutes."

"Ok, well how long until I can see you?"

"My dad just wants me to eat dinner with him, and then we'll go get the girls and go do something. I got the car tonight." Rachel smiled.

"Awesome! I'm going to call them. When your done beep out front."

"Sounds good. See you in a few." Rachel hung up the phone with her friend. She started to feel better. She was going to see the only real friends she ever had. The girls she grew up with in LA were fake and conceded. Rachel was so different. She was more like the three girls she was going to meet up with later. She had seen them three months before for Christmas and couldn't wait until summer to see them again. Now she would be living right near them and seeing them as much as she wanted. Rachel went through her clothes and picked out a pair of dark blue stone washed jeans and a black long sleeve fitted shirt. She walked to the linen closet and took out towels and made her way to her bathroom down the hall. Her father had his own bathroom in his room so this one was all Rachel's.

The warm water from the shower felt great. The cold air outside was something she wasn't used to, but being in that shower made it all better. After she showered she did her hair and make up then went back in her room to get dressed. She headed downstairs and saw her father paying the delivery boy. "Ah, just in time." He headed to the dinning room. She sat next to him and grabbed a slice. She was surprisingly hungry now. Two and a half slices and two cans of Pepsi later she was beyond full. She burped loud and started to laugh. Her father looked at her with raised eyebrows. "Sorry dad." She got up and threw her plate in the garbage.

"So what time do you plan on coming home?"

"Dad! I'm going to be eighteen in less than two months. Please don't do this." She sat back next to her father. "Trust me huh? It's Friday and I don't have school until Tuesday because of my transcript papers." Rachel smiled at her father's saddened face. He was so handsome, even when he was being pathetic.

"I do trust you. And I trust the girls. I know you have been coming here for a long time now, but things are changing around here. I just don't want you guys falling into the wrong crowd."

"Oh God! Dad! Really, I have to go. I love you and I won't be home _too_ late." She kissed her father's head and grabbed the keys he was holding in his hand. She grabbed her jacket and headed to the door. She stopped for a second then turned around and walked quickly to her father. She bent down and hugged him, kissing his head hard. "I love you dad." She whispered. He put his hand on her arm and closed his eyes. He smiled. "I love you too baby." Rachel walked out the front door and got into her father's Jeep Grand Cherokee. It was brand new and Rachel was almost hesitant on driving it. Then the smile that was on her face grew wider and she started the truck. She pulled out of the driveway and pulled up to the house across from her fathers. She honked. One minute later Nicole came running out of the house. Her blonde hair flying behind her in big waves. She jumped in the car and threw her arms around Rachel. Squeezing with all of her might. "I missed you so much. I'm so sorry I couldn't be there for you." Nicole pulled away and started to cry. Nicole was definitely the closest one to her out of the three girls. Every time she went back home Nicole would cry and tell her she loved her.

"I'm ok Nic. I'm better now that I'm going to be with my girls." Rachel wiped a tear from Nicole's cheek. Nicole loved her friend very much and couldn't wait for her to come back. Just not like this. "We ready?" Rachel asked. Nicole nodded her head and put her seat belt on. They headed to Daniela's house.

"Brooke is already there. When I called them they started screaming and Brooke drove to Daniela's to wait for us. You know how impatient she is." Nicole laughed. Nicole was about 5'8", only an inch shorter than Rachel. She was thin and pretty. She had deep blue eyes that reminded Rachel of a blue crayon. Her blonde hair was filled with natural streaks. Nicole always said she hated her hair and wished she had dark brown hair like Rachel.

Rachel pulled up in front of Daniela's house and was about to honk when she saw her friends standing in the walkway. She rolled down her window. "Why are you two standing in the cold?" Rachel laughed.

"Take a guess?" Daniela said looking over at Brooke. Brooke squeaked and ran to the car. She hugged Rachel through the window and jumped in the back seat. Daniela did the same. "So where to ladies?" Rachel asked before pulling away.

"Ask Nicole. I'm sure she'll tell us." Brooke laughed.

"Shut up Brooke!" Nicole shot her a stern look.

"What is she talking about?" Rachel asked Nicole.

"Nicole has a boyfriend. She didn't tell you?" Daniela added.

"Um, no actually she didn't." Rachel smiled and raised her eyebrows. "Well?"

"Ok. First off, he's not my boyfriend, officially, yet. Second, I didn't tell you because I didn't think it was an appropriate time." Nicole put her head down.

"Nic, I am so excited for you!" Rachel said. Nudging her friend's arm.

"You won't be after you meet him." Brooke said under her breath. Rachel heard her loud and clear.

"God Brooke, do you ever know when to keep that mouth shut!" Nicole snapped.

"Listen, if you like him, I'll like him." Rachel started to pull away. "So where to?"

"Well, there's this bar, The Four Roses. We can get a few drinks with no problem and you can meet Joe." Nicole said. She looked like a child asking her mothers permission for something.

"Sounds good. Show me the way." Rachel wasn't sure of how great this night was going to be, but she wanted her friend to know she supported her no matter what. It was only right to meet the man she was with. Nicole gave her the directions and thirty minutes later they were in a part of Boston Rachel had never seen before. They were in the city and from the looks of it, not a great part. They were the only car on the road and Rachel could see homeless people trying to stay warm with barrels filled with fire across from a gas station.

"So, now where?" Rachel asked.

"Just keep following this main road and at the end make a left and we'll be right there." Nicole could see the concern in Rachel's eyes. _Maybe this wasn't such a good idea_. She thought. But she wanted so badly for her to meet Joe. A few minutes later they pulled into a big empty parking lot. Only four other cars accompanied hers. The four girls poured out of the truck and headed towards the door. Nicole went first and was greeted by a tall over weight man with tattoos all over his face and neck.

"Nikki baby. Been awhile since I seen you here." The man bent down and kissed her on the cheek.

"I know Al. School has been kicking my ass lately." She looked back at her friends.

"You remember Brooke and Daniela right? They came here a few times." He nodded. "And this, this is Rachel." She pulled Rachel's arm and pulled her in front of the man like she was her prize.

"Well, Rachel. Aren't you the prettiest thing I've ever seen?" His eyes groped her viciously. Rachel pulled her jacket tighter around her chest. "You better keep this one away from the boys Nicole. They'll eat her alive." He smirked.

"I'm gonna tell them the same thing I'm gonna to tell you, keep your thing in your pants. She's too good for you." Nicole laughed and pulled her friend into the bar. The place was dirty, dark and filled to the brim with smoke. Rachel coughed slightly. _Was this really the place where Nicole hung out?_ She thought. They walked past the bar which was filled with dirty looking men. The bar tender was doing a horrible job at trying to hit on Rachel with his eyes. All she could do was laugh. At the end of the bar was a big table. There were big men with tattoos all over their necks and faces sitting and talking loud about what Rachel could make out, a dart board game. One of the men, the youngest looking, looked up at them. He smiled and got up, walking straight to Nicole. He grabbed Nicole and kissed her passionately, deep and sincere. Nicole kissed him back. Her hands were all over him. Rachel had never seen her friend like this before. She began to feel embarrassed watching her in her embrace. Nicole pulled away and smiled. "I want you to meet someone." She pulled him to Rachel.

"This is Rachel Hedlund. This is the girl I was telling you about." Nicole said smiling.

"Rachel. This is Joe. Joe Darley." Nicole's smile grew wider.

"Nice to finally meet the infamous Rachel." He put out his hand for her to shake. She took it.

"Nice to finally meet you too." Rachel said. Joe gestured for them to sit at a table across from his. Before they sat one of the guys whistled at the girls. He stood up and looked over at them. "Hey Nicole. What the fuck?! You only introduce your man to your hot friend here and not us!" He was shorter than Rachel and had a tribal tattoo coming from his neck onto his cheek and forehead.

"Sorry Tommy. Tommy this is Rachel, Rachel that's Tommy." Tommy winked at her. _Like he had a chance. _"That's Heco, Spink, Jamie, Dog and that's Baggy." She went around the table. They all said hello and Rachel sat down.

"Aren't they scary looking? I hate when she brings us here." Brooke whispered in Rachel's ear.

"Where did she meet this kid?" Rachel asked.

"You're never going to believe this, but he's friends with her brother Adam." Daniela said.

"What? Dorky Adam? Never!" Adam was the complete opposite of Nicole. He had straight A's in school, obeyed his curfew and never talked to strangers, or strange people. Nicole was a slight wild child that liked to have fun but always knew when it was too much.

"Seriously! Adam was having some trouble awhile back. He started to experiment with pot and got hooked. He buys from Joe and Joe and Adam kinda hit it off. Then we all went with him to buy from Joe one night and then, Nicole and Joe hit it off. The rest is history." Daniela said.

"These guys look dangerous." Rachel whispered.

"They are." Brooke said. Her eyes intense. "I heard a lot of stories about these guys. Nicole refuses to believe them, but I know deep down she knows there true."

"What stories?" Their conversation was interrupted by heavy laughter and cursing. It was coming from the front door.

"Oh my God, is that him?" Daniela's blue eyes grew wide.

"Is that who?" Rachel turned around to see who she was looking at but a wall was blocking her view.

"Daniela, it _is_ him. It has to be." Brooke's green eyes were wide too. Nicole turned to see what her friends were looking at. Her eyes grew wide and she turned to them quickly.

"Put your eyes back in your fucking heads." She whispered.

"Nicole what's going on?" Rachel asked.

"Nothing, it's just Billy. Joe's older brother. He's the leader I guess you can say, of these pack of boys." Nicole said. Suddenly Billy came into Rachel's view. He was walking with another man. Joe had called him Bodie. What kind of names do these guys have? Rachel looked back at Billy. He was tall and slightly built with broad shoulders. His head was shaved to the skin and tribal tattoos could be seen going up his neck through his fitted brown trench coat. The tattoos on these guys all matched each other. She couldn't see his face too well until he sat down. He had facial hair which probably made him look older. He took his coat off and rolled up his sleeves. The tattoos that were more visible on his neck went down both of his arms to his wrists. He was the most dangerous looking of them all. She didn't realize how long she had been looking at him until Nicole waved her hand in her face.

"What?" Rachel asked.

"What? Shall I get you a napkin for the drool that is falling from your mouth?" Nicole asked smiling.

"What, no way. I'm just not used to that look. That's all. LA boys don't look anything like these guys." She looked past Nicole and noticed he was lighting a cigarette. He inhaled deep then caught Rachel's stare.

"Shit!" Rachel whispered.

"What?" Nicole asked.

"He's coming over here." Rachel shifted in her chair and looked over to Daniela.

"Hey Nicole, didn't know you were here." His voice was deep and raspy. His eyes were intense. Rachel couldn't make out if they were blue or green.

"Hey Billy, yeah we just got here a little while ago." Nicole looked up at him.

"Are you going to introduce me to your friends?" He said staring at Nicole.

"Um, yeah sorry. This is Daniela. This is Brooke, and this is Rachel." He said hello to Brooke and Daniela. Then his eyes fell on Rachel. He put his hand out for her to shake. She accepted.

"Nice to meet you ladies. Since you happen to come on a night that I'm in an extremely good mood, anything you drink is on the house." He smirked at them then walked back to his chair. After he sat he glanced at Rachel one last time. Rachel grabbed Nicole's hand.

"Since when do you hang out with people like this?" She demanded.

"What? What's wrong with them? Why, because they have tattoos and they curse?"

"First off they are all way older than us. Maybe, except for Joe, he looks like he's our age." Rachel said.

"He's twenty three. He's only four years older than me. Listen, my parents know I'm talking to him and they don't care." Nicole sat back crossing her arms. She was visibly getting annoyed. "Talking to him, means talking to his friends. No not his friends. These guys are his family."

"I'm just saying Nicole. This doesn't seem like your crowd. I mean, captain of the cheerleading squad, track and band." Rachel pointed at Nicole. "That's the Nicole I left three months ago." Rachel sat back.

"I'm still doing all of those things. This," She waved her hand around the bar, "this is just my past time." She laughed. "So seriously, what do you think about Joe?"

"He's cute. He really seems to like you." Rachel laughed, remembering their embrace earlier.

"No, _you_ go fuck yourself!" The guy Tommy was standing up ripping his jacket off. "Let's go Baggy! Outside you mother fucker!" He yelled. Rachel could see Billy laughing. For such a scary looking guy he had an amazing smile.

"Fuck you Tommy. You're drunk." Baggy looked over his shoulder at Rachel and her friends. "Look at you, your embarrassing yourself in front of the cute girls back there."

"Fuck them too." Tommy stuck his middle finger up at them.

"Hey Tommy, watch yourself. My girls over there." Joe stood up. Billy stood up too and put his arm in front of Joe and whispered something in his ear. Joe's face was red.

"Whatever Joe." Tommy grabbed his jacket off the floor and stormed out of the bar.

"See Nicole. Every time we come they fight with someone else or with each other. I wanna go home. Now!" Daniela said getting up. Nicole looked hurt. She looked over at Rachel.

"What do you want me to do? I have to bring her home." Rachel got up and put her jacket back on.

"Yeah, I think I want to leave too." Brooke put her jacket on and started to walk from the table.

"You're leaving?" Joe walked over to Nicole.

"Listen, you stay. They want to go home, let me take them home. I have to finish unpacking anyway. We still have tomorrow night." Rachel assured Nicole.

"I love you." Nicole said hugging Rachel. Rachel told her she loved her too.

"And you." She pointed to Joe. "Take care of my girl here. It was nice meeting you." Rachel put her hand out to Joe. He shook it and smiled. "Nice to meet you too."

Rachel began to walk to the door to meet her friends when that deep voice yelled out. "Hey, you leaving?" Rachel turned to see Billy, cigarette in mouth and beer in hand.

"Yeah, these girls gotta get home. I have unpacking to do." Rachel didn't know what else to say.

"You make sure you come out again." Billy smirked at her. He winked and she smiled. "I will." She turned and left. The girls got into the truck and Rachel pulled away.

"Oh my God. I can't believe that creep hit on you like that. He's a bad guy Rachel, I'm telling you." Brooke said pulling her short black hair into a ponytail.

"He may be a bad guy, but God is he hot!" Daniela said. She was playing with the radio.

"Ew, you and Nicole think the strangest people are good looking." Brooke was so dramatic.

"Oh stop it Brooke. He didn't hit on me. Besides, he wasn't so bad. He was, different. Way different than those California boys I'm used to." Rachel laughed.

"I still can't picture Nicole with that Joe guy." Daniela said.

"Nicole started seeing him before you came for Christmas Ray. She just wasn't sure what was really going on. So she kept it from all of us. Then she became like obsessed with him." Brooke said leaning forward.

"She had sex with him." Daniela said. Brooke smacked her arm. "No she did not. I asked her she told me no." Brooke's argued.

"Brooke, just because _you're_ waiting until your married doesn't mean everyone else is. I'm telling you she had sex with him. I mean, c'mon. Look at him. Look at his friends. _Look_ at his brother. Do they look like the type of guys that want to wait around? She likes him way to much. She would give it up just to keep him interested." Daniela started playing with her cell phone.

"I don't know Dan. He looks like he really likes her. Even lions can have a heart. What if he just genuinely likes her? Maybe that's why she's so into him." Rachel always tried to see the positive in a person. One of the many traits she got from her dad.

"Of course _you_ would say that." Daniela poked her rib. They all laughed. Rachel dropped them both off at Daniela's house. She pulled away and headed home when her cell phone started to ring. She reached into her bag and pulled it out. It wasn't ringing. "What the hell?" She said out loud. She listened closely to where the ring was coming from. She pulled the car over and reached under the passenger's seat. "Great!" It was Nicole's phone. She picked it up.

"Hello." Rachel said.

"Rachel!" Nicole said. "Thank God you have it. I thought I lost it forever. Could you please, please bring it back to the bar? I'm using the pay phone and Joe's battery is dead so I won't have a phone all night."

"Sure. I'll be there as soon as I can." Rachel hung up the phone and pulled away. _Unbelievable_! She thought. Now she had to drive all the way back to that bar by herself.

When she reached the parking lot Nicole and Joe were waiting outside. Rachel pulled down the window and Nicole hugged her. Nicole thanked her a million times and kissed her face. Joe was laughing and noticeably drunk.

"I love you so much." Nicole said for the fifth time.

"How are you getting home?" Rachel asked.

"My brother." Joe said.

"Ok. I just wanted to know, being I'm here again." Rachel laughed.

"Oh looky here. One of your girls' whores came back? Did she like me that much?" Tommy was walking towards Rachel's truck. He was tripping over his own feet. He was visibly wasted.

"Did he just call me a whore?" Rachel asked Joe.

"Just ignore him. He's drunk and won't even remember meeting you tomorrow." Joe said.

"I heard you piss ant. I'll remember her. She's too hot to forget." Tommy walked up to her open window. He pushed Nicole out of the way. Nicole looked up at Joe. Tommy reached in and touched Rachel's cheek. "Hey Tommy, why don't you go back inside now." Joe grabbed his arm. Tommy pushed him off and looked at Rachel square in the eye. "You come back for some action?" Tommy said. He reeked of whisky.

"No, and even if I did it wouldn't be with you." Rachel wasn't sure if getting smart with this guy was the best idea.

"Hey Tommy. Leave the girl alone. She isn't interested." Joe pulled on him again. Tommy turned around and pushed Joe to the floor.

"You think you can do what you want because of who your brother is? We're his brothers too. Shut the fuck up." He turned back to Rachel. Her heart was in her throat. This guy was even scarier up close. Rachel could see Nicole running into the bar. _Is she kidding me? She's leaving! _Rachel yelled in her head. Joe got on his feet and stood next to Tommy. She wasn't sure if he was trying to protect her or trying to avenge himself. Seconds later Billy came bursting through the door with Nicole right behind him.

"Go inside Joe. Take your girl with you." Billy said calmly. He kissed his brothers forehead and walked to the truck.

"Hey Tommy, why don't you go inside and finish your drink. I think you've been out here long enough." Tommy eyed Rachel's entire body.

"What Billy? You want her for yourself?" Tommy said, not taking his eyes off of her.

"I never said that, you prick. But clearly you got the girl shook for no reason." Billy looked at Rachel. Her eyes were begging for help. "Listen, this is my brother's girl's best friend. I just can't sit here and watch you harass her. You fuckin' know that." Billy put his hands on Tommy's back. He slowly pulled him away from the window. He turned Tommy around and started pushing him towards the door. Billy looked back at Rachel. "You, don't move!" He pointed at her. Rachel had been around drunken people before. She had seen fights and even been at this end before. But these guys were different. Rachel was actually scared. Billy came back out the door just a few seconds later. He had his coat on and a new cigarette in his mouth. _He even walked like a tuff guy._ Rachel thought. Daniela was right. He was hot for a bad guy.

"Thank you." Rachel Said.

"Don't mention it." He smiled. "So, what brings you back here?" He asked, eyeing her.

"Nicole left her phone in my truck. She asked me to bring it to her."

"Right, you sure you didn't do it on purpose just to see me again?" Billy asked.

Rachel smiled and looked down at her hands. "How old are you?"

"Twenty nine."

"Ok. We're eleven years apart. I think you may be a bit too old for me." Rachel said smiling. Billy wasn't smiling anymore. He looked angry. Rachel's smile faded and a nervous chill ran down her back. He had the look of a crazed man.

"So, you're eighteen?" He asked flatly.

"I will be in May." Rachel said.

"Yeah well. You're too inexperienced for me." He shot her a look that might as well of said fuck you. He took a deep drag of his cigarette and blew the smoke right in Rachel's face. He turned around and walked back into the bar. Rachel didn't wait to see if Nicole was coming back out. She drove away and headed home. The whole ride home all she could do was picture the look on Billy's face. Maybe Brooke was right about them. Maybe they were really bad people. Billy's expression showed he had it in him to be a monster. Why would he be insulted if she said he was too old for her? Eleven years is a big difference at her age. _Why do I even give a shit?_ She asked herself. She pulled into her father's driveway. "It's one o'clock already?" She asked out loud. She turned the truck off and locked the doors. She headed to the front door and opened it as slowly as possible. Last thing she wanted was to wake her father and have him asking how her first night here went. She walked into the front hall and was about to walk up the stairs when she heard her father snoring in the living room. She walked in to find him sleeping with his clothes on from that day and a book under his arm. His glasses fell past his nose. Rachel reached down and pulled the book out and took his glasses off. She placed them on the table and covered him with a blanket. Rachel ran to her room and got undressed. Why was the conversation with Billy playing in her head? It was stupid, yet she couldn't stop thinking about it.

Rachel put her pajamas on and hopped into bed. She shut her light and closed her eyes. Tommy's face kept popping up in her head, then Billy's then Nicole's. She couldn't keep them out_. Did I insult him?_ She thought. _Am I going to ruin anything between Nicole and Joe? He seems to like her a lot. _At this rate she was never going to get to sleep. Rachel's conscience always did a number on her. She felt bad for everything she ever did. Even if she truly knew she wasn't wrong. For the next two hours Rachel tossed and turned. Thoughts of her night swam through her mind, and then drifted into memories of her mother. Rachel jumped at the sound of a car door slamming. All of her memories left her mind as she listened to the noises outside. She could hear a girl laughing, and a guy, and music. Rock music. Rachel got out of her bed and peaked through her blinds. She recognized the voices but wasn't sure until she could see Nicole kissing Joe right in the middle of the street. Nicole broke from his grips and headed to her walkway. Joe grabbed her in his arms and started kissing her again. Then she had seen him. Billy. He got out of his car and started yelling. "Joe let's go. I got shit to do." He yelled. "One minute." Joe kissed her again. "Hey Nicole, where's your friend Rachel live?" Billy asked. Nicole pointed to the house across the street like a little girl. She started to laugh and grabbed Joe's face and started kissing him again. Rachel saw Billy turn around and look at the house. He had a mischievous smile on his face. Then he got back in his car. _What was that for?_ Rachel asked herself. She jumped back in her bed as she heard Billy screech his tires. She was going to call Nicole as soon as she got up. She wanted to know more about this Billy guy. "But why?" She said out loud.


	2. Chapter 2

_**T**__he long hall was filled with dust. It was rolling in slow perfect swirls. She could hardly breathe as she ran. She had been running for what seemed like hours. Her legs were shaky under her and she knew she could collapse at any moment. She couldn't give up. She had to continue. Her mind was racing with unknown thoughts and her heart was beating fast and hard. She could feel her breath getting caught in her throat as she struggled to pace herself. Not much further. Only a few more feet and she could stop. But did she want to stop? Did she care to see what was behind the closed door at the end of the hall? "Rachel!" She stopped suddenly and lost her balance. Her hands desperately reached for the wall in front of her. She gained composure and turned to see the owner of the voice. "Rachel, don't be scared. It's ok now. I'm fine. I'm safe. You must go. Be good and take care of your father. Rachel's eyes widened as she stared into her mother's lifeless face." Mother! She tried to scream but the word could not come out._

Rachel's body jumped and her eyes shot open. Her heavy breathing was the only thing she could hear. She slowly rose from her bed and brought her legs down to the floor. She placed her elbows on her knees and cupped her face slowly with trembling hands. She tried desperately to keep her sobs low to not attract attention from her father. Every night since her mother's death she had the same dream. She was running down the hall to her mother's hospital room after she got the call that she had passed. Her mind was racing and she didn't understand her surroundings. She felt for the first time in her life, that she was out of her own body. As if she was looking down on the situation. And that was how her dreams had been.

Rachel sat up straight and wiped the tears from her cheeks and eyes. After several deep breaths she walked out of her room to the bathroom. She brushed her teeth and cleaned her face. Her reflection in the mirror shown something she had seen before but never fully understood. She looked lost and confused. These dreams felt so real and always took a lot out of her by the following morning. She shut her eyes tightly, almost trying to squeeze the remaining images out of her head. Her breath was steady and her trembling hands finally stopped. She opened her eyes. Her image was starting to look familiar again. She opened the door and headed back to her room. She stopped at her doorway when she heard a familiar voice. Holding her breath she walked to the head of the stairs and slowly walked down. She could hear her father talking now. He was saying something about Rachel sleeping.

"I just wanted to make sure she was ok." The voice belonged to Nicole.

"Why wouldn't she be ok? Did something happen last night?" her father asked.

"Nothing happened last night Dad." Rachel walked into the kitchen. She smiled faintly at Nicole. Nicole's eyebrows narrowed at the sight of her friend.

"You don't look so good. Are you feeling ok?" her father walked over to her and put his mouth to her forehead. "No fever."

"Dad, I'm fine. I just didn't sleep to well. I'll be ok." Rachel walked to the refrigerator and took out a Vitamin Water. "I'm going back upstairs, you coming Nic?" Rachel walked back to the hall and headed up the stairs. Nicole said good bye to Rachel's father and followed her friend. Nicole walked into Rachel's room. She was lying on her bed with her eyes shut. Nicole closed the door than sat at her desk.

"You sure you're ok? You want to talk about it?" Nicole asked.

"Just one of those dreams I told you about. It's been every night." Rachel said with her eyes still closed.

"Well, maybe you just need time to heal. I mean isn't that what they say? Time heals all wounds." Nicole smiled.

Rachel opened one eye and looked at her friend. Rachel grinned than sat up. She didn't want to get into the dream with her anymore. She didn't want to think about the horrible alone feeling she felt. She wanted to stop having these dreams and start sleeping better. Her mother would never have wanted her to feel this way. Rachel shook her head lightly, shaking the thoughts from her mind, than looked at her friend.

"So what brings you here?" Rachel asked.

"I just wanted to make sure you were ok. I came back out last night to see you and you were gone. Billy was in a mood the rest of the night. Joe asked him what was wrong and he just waved him away." Nicole smiled again. "Did you two have a fight?"

"He's an asshole." Rachel said bluntly. "He got bent because I told him he was too old for me. Then he tried to insult me by saying I'm too _inexperienced_ for him. Like, was that supposed to hurt?"

"Oh boy, well I think you're the one who hurt him." Nicole laughed.

"What's his deal? Like the tuff guy persona. Is it real?" Rachel asked.

"Oh yes it's real. He's been that way his whole life, according to Joe. Honestly Ray, he isn't the type of guy I would want you talking to. Like _that_ I mean." Nicole's expression changing to concern.

"Why?"

"Why? Because. I mean, I've heard things about him even before I met Joe. He's nice to me, yeah of course because I'm with his brother. But I know he has a temper and I also know he isn't the most honest person."

"Listen, I'm not going to talk to him like _that_. But maybe, I should apologize. I didn't mean to make him mad." Rachel was feeling that guilt again.

"Yeah. That's fine. I'm going to the bar tonight, you should come. I know the Doublement Twins won't come, so it will be just you and me." Nicole and Rachel laughed.

"Sounds good."

"You won't have to drive tonight. Billy and Joe will come and pick us up." Nicole said.

"Are you sure he won't mind picking me up too?" Rachel asked.

"I'm sure he won't say anything. He doesn't want me and Joe to fight." Nicole smiled. She got up and headed towards the door. "I should go, I have stuff to do. Be ready by nine." She smiled.

"Nine it is. I'll meet you in front of your house." She got up and walked out to the hall with her friend. They walked down the stairs and to the front door. They hugged each other than Nicole ran across the street.

Rachel spent the rest of her day unpacking and cleaning her room. At seven thirty she picked out her clothes for the night and took a shower. Her father had questioned her about going out again. But she shrugged him off. He looked at his daughters outfit as she entered the dining room.

"Rachel. Usually I don't bother you about your appearance because you always seem to dress more appropriately than your friends." He looked up at her from his seat at the dining room table. His glasses fell to the tip of his nose. "But this, I mean when do you dress like this?" He pointed at her very tight jeans and very fitted dark brown sweater. She had a thick headband on that matched her sweater and her eyes were done up smokey. She knew she may have over dressed tonight, but a part of her wanted attention from Billy.

"What's wrong with what I have on?" She put her hands up in the air and looked down at her clothes. She looked back up and smiled at her father.

"It's just, very tight." His cheeks began to turn a light shade of pink.

"Aw, Daddy. You can be so cute sometimes." She leaned down and kissed her fathers forehead. "I'll be back later. Don't wait up. I love you." Her father said he loved her back and to be careful. Rachel headed to Nicole's house. She walked up the long walkway and knocked on the door. A minute later Nicole's mother opened the door.

"Rachel. How are you? Come in." She stepped aside to let Rachel in.

"I'm doing good Mrs. Murtagh." Rachel said.

"I'm so sorry about your mother sweetheart. I heard she was a wonderful woman." Mrs. Murtagh hugged Rachel. Rachel let the woman hold her. It felt good having a mother hug her again. Rachel bit the inside of her cheek to help fight back the tears that started to form in her eyes. Mrs. Murtagh pulled back and looked at Rachel.

"You have grown up into a beautiful young lady. _You_ are gorgeous. My God, you look so much like your father." Rachel smiled at the woman. Nicole was a spitting image of her mother. Tall, blonde, thin and beautiful.

"You're early." Nicole said coming down the stairs.

"I know. I got ready quick. So I figured instead of sitting at home I would just come here." Nicole motioned for her to come up the stairs. Rachel followed Nicole to her room. Nicole's room was three times the size of Rachel's. Rachel sat on her queen sized bed. Nicole went to her walk in closet and started pulling clothes out.

"Well, I did have an outfit picked out but I can't go in that now after seeing how nice you look." Nicole said.

"Yeah, I was just in one of those moods tonight." Rachel said smiling.

"Sure." Nicole exited the closet holding a denim mini skirt and a black sweater.

"I like that." Rachel said pointing at the skirt.

"You think Joe will like it?" Nicole said putting the skirt and sweater in front of her while looking in her full length mirror.

"Joe is not going to be able to control himself around you." Rachel laughed.

"Then thank god for your choice of clothing tonight." Nicole smirked and winked at Rachel.

"What are you implying Nicole?" Rachel raised an eyebrow at her friend.

"I was thinking me and Joe have waited long enough. I think tonight is _the_ night." Nicole looked at her friend as if for approval.

"So you two haven't?" Rachel waved her finger back and forth.

"Had sex? No. But for some reason now it feels right." Nicole said while getting dressed. She walked over to her vanity and applied her make up and pulled her long hair back in a ponytail.

"Wow, and Daniela was sure you two did it already." Rachel said.

"Daniela thinks she knows everything. What time is it?" Nicole asked. Rachel reached in her coat pocket and pulled her cell phone out.

"Eight forty three." Rachel said.

"Thank god I shaved this morning." Nicole said laughing as she put her knee high boots on. "Come on, let's wait outside. I need a cigarette." Nicole grabbed her coat and they headed down the stairs. Nicole's mother heard them and met them at the door.

"So where are you beautiful ladies headed tonight?" She asked.

"Out with Joe and Billy." Nicole said flatly to her mother.

"Oh, I see. Well have a good night. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Nicole's mother waved at them then walked down the hall to the living room.

"You mean don't do anything you _would_ do." Nicole said low but loud enough for Rachel to hear. She laughed. Rachel knew that Nicole and her mother never really got along. It was as if they were in constant competition with each other. Rachel could never understand why they were enemies when Rachel and her mother were best friends.

They headed out the door and walked to the end of the walkway. Nicole pulled out a Parliament Menthol Light and lit it. She inhaled deep and closed her eyes. She exhaled slow and sighed.

"I thought you quit?" Rachel asked.

"I tried. I really tried. But this is my only outlet. Well this and liquor." They both laughed. Rachel was about to say something when they could hear a loud engine and tires squeaking. A black mustang with red flames was flying up the block. The car stopped short in front of Nicole's house. The driver's window was half way down.

"Always making a grand entrance huh Billy?" Nicole asked walking around the car to the passenger's side. Joe got out of the car and grabbed Nicole. He was checking out her ensemble. He bit his lower lip than grabbed the back of her head and pulled her in for a kiss. Rachel stepped back as Billy exited the car. He got out slow then put his head back a bit and his eyes were peering down at her. He looked like an animal. Rachel just stood there looking at him. She didn't know what to do.

"Get in." He motioned his hand towards the car. Rachel put her eyes down and slowly climbed into the backseat. Billy climbed in and slammed the door. Rachel jumped. She looked over to Joe and Nicole who were still locked in their kiss. Rachel was now regretting coming out. His eyes had been intense. She didn't realize how much she had upset him. It was clear he didn't care for her much. Rachel looked into the rearview mirror. She could see Billy's eyes. He was staring straight out the front window. His eyes looked green from the reflection of the street lights. She thought how nice his eyes were. How kind they could look. As if he could feel her stare he looked in the rearview mirror right at Rachel. His eyes squinted as he stared at her. Rachel looked down at her hands. Praying he wasn't looking at her anymore.

"Let's go!" Billy yelled. _Thank god._ Rachel thought to herself. Nicole jumped into the backseat and smiled at Rachel. Rachel couldn't help but smile back. She had never seen her friend so happy before. Joe jumped in the car and Billy drove off before he could close the door.

"What the fuck asshole!" Joe yelled as he pulled the door shut.

"You took too long." Billy said flatly.

"Alright, but you could have killed me." Joe turned and smiled at Nicole. He said hello to Rachel.

"I would have caught you." Nicole laughed.

The drive to the bar seemed to take forever. To avoid conversation Billy had turned the radio on as loud as he could handle. Rachel's ears felt as if they were going to burst. Billy pulled into the parking lot of the Four Roses quickly and stopped short. Rachel and Nicole slammed into the front seats.

"Seriously, what is your problem?" Nicole yelled. Billy looked back at her and said nothing. He got out of the car and lifted the seat so Rachel could get out. He didn't give her much room to move. Their faces were only inches away from each other. Rachel's nerves got the best of her and she lost her balance, bumping into Billy's chest.

"I'm sorry." She said as she backed away. Billy just looked at her. Rachel backed away from him and watched him slam the door and walk off into the bar. Nicole grabbed her arm.

"Are you ok?" She asked.

"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea." Rachel said.

"Listen if things get weird we'll leave. I have money for a cab so we'll be ok." Nicole whispered. Joe grabbed Nicole's hand and pulled her toward the door. Rachel followed. Her stomach was hurting. Her idea of the night was already starting off wrong. She didn't think that apologizing to him was going to make a difference anymore. They walked into the bar and headed straight to the back. Rachel walked to a table that was unoccupied. She took her jacket off. Nicole walked over to her.

"Why are you sitting here? The table next to the guys is empty." Nicole asked looking down at her friend with concerned eyes.

"I'm still close to them." Rachel said.

"Alright, I'm going to get a drink. You want something?"

"Yeah, get me a vodka and cranberry please." Rachel decided the only way she was getting through the night was to get drunk, or at least buzzed. Nicole walked away and headed to the bar. A minute later she came back with their drinks. She sat down across from Rachel.

"Here you go. Enjoy." Nicole raised her glass to Rachel then took a sip. Rachel did the same.

"Wow! They make these really strong." Rachel said. Joe and the guy they called Baggy walked over to them. Baggy sat down next to Rachel. Nicole smiled and laughed to herself.

"So you came back." Baggy said.

"Yup. I don't scare away that easily." Rachel took a big sip of her drink. Baggy laughed.

"Slow down. I don't want you all drunk and stupid." Baggy said.

"_You_ don't want me drunk and stupid?" Rachel put her drink down and looked right at Baggy. "So how exactly do you want me?" Rachel was always good at the flirting game. Baggy wasn't expecting that comment and it was written across his face. He was speechless for a moment.

"Are you sure you want me to tell you?" Baggy leaned in closer to Rachel. Rachel smiled her best smile than picked her drink back up. Maybe tonight wasn't going to be too bad. At least she was going to have someone to talk to while Nicole and Joe were too into each other.

"Do you know how to play pool?" Baggy asked.

"No." Rachel said smiling.

"Wanna learn?"

"Sure. You can teach me. But first, can you get me another one of these?" Rachel said shaking her empty glass in Baggy's face. Baggy grabbed her glass and walked to the bar. Billy was sitting at the bar talking to the bar tender. Probably about money he owed Billy for drugs.

"Sammy! Another Vodka and Cranberry." Baggy put the empty glass down. Billy looked over at him.

"What? You got your period?" Billy said pointing to the glass.

"Funny dick. No, that's for that fine piece of ass sitting over there." Baggy pointed to the table where Rachel, Nicole and Joe were sitting. Billy's anger began to rise as he looked at Rachel. He didn't want to let Baggy know so he kept his cool.

"So you're her waitress now?" Billy asked with sarcasm in his voice.

"I'll wait on her hand and foot all night if it helps my chances of landing that." Baggy's smile grew wide.

"Well, good luck. She doesn't take to older men."

"That's only because she hasn't had an older man yet." Baggy grabbed the drink Sammy had placed on the bar and smiled at Billy before he headed back to Rachel. Billy sat at the bar with his hand clenched around his drink.

"Are you plannin on breakin that glass or what?" Sammy asked Billy. He pointed to Billy's hand.

"And if I do you can take it off the bill you own me." Billy let go of the glass and told Sammy to fill it again. He pulled out his cigarettes and lit one. He took his drink and headed back to the table to have some fun with the boys.

Rachel was trying her best not to laugh at Baggy's impatience. She had four Vodka and Cranberry's in her system and was feeling wonderful. Her attempt at playing pool while partially intoxicated wasn't going well. She knocked Baggy in the head with the cue stick twice, hit the balls off of the table and managed to get chalk all over Baggy's shirt.

"Are you going to take this serious or what?" Baggy put his hands on his hips and looked over at Rachel with an annoyed expression.

"I'm sure she's trying, but she's also drunk." Nicole said. She had been watching them the entire time. Not only to watch the comedy act but to also make sure Baggy didn't take advantage of her friend.

"C'mon Bag. I'll play you." Joe said walking from his brother's table. He winked at Nicole than started to wrack the balls. Rachel handed him the cue stick and they both laughed. Rachel walked over to Nicole and sat next to her.

"How you feeling?" Nicole asked. She was clearly sober.

"Honestly, I needed this Nicole. Thank you." Rachel leaned in and hugged her friend. "Oh, I need to check my messages. See if the father figure called at all." Rachel got up and walked to her coat that was left at their table. She sat down hard and laughed to herself. She started to feel those drinks even more now. She reached into her coat pocket and pulled out her phone. No messages, no missed calls. "Thank God." She said out loud.

"Expecting a call?" A deep handsome voice said to her. She slowly looked up to see Billy standing there with two shot glasses in his hands.

"Nope, just the opposite. Hoping there wasn't one." Rachel kept her eyes on him. She wasn't feeling that timid feeling she had earlier in the night. Now she wasn't afraid of talking to him. Billy sat down across from her and placed one of the shot glasses in front of her.

"Have a shot with me." He said.

"Why?" She asked. It was clear she was annoyed.

"Because I'm asking you to." He raised his eyebrows.

"Why would you want to have a shot with me? You clearly hate me." Rachel's expression didn't change.

"I don't hate you. You would have to do a lot more than an insult to make me hate you." Billy raised his shot glass and looked down at hers. Rachel picked up the glass he offered her and raised it up. They clanked their glasses together than Billy downed his first followed by Rachel. Whiskey. Great. Rachel hated whiskey. She started to cough but controlled it quickly.

"So. I see you and Baggy are hitting it off." Billy smiled as he lit a cigarette.

"He's not so bad. But, I don't think so." Rachel smiled back. She couldn't help staring at Billy. He had the most gorgeous features. His eyes were perfect, his smile showed a set of perfect big white teeth.

"Well. You better tell him that. He thinks he's got a shot with you." Billy leaned closer to Rachel. Looking deep into her eyes. A wonderful chill bolted down her stomach.

"How would you know what he thinks? You two talked about me?" Rachel said also leaning forward.

"No, _he_ talked about you. I just stood there making believe I was interested."

"Sure you did." Rachel's heart was pounding at Billy's mere presence. How could this be happening? Billy's expression changed back to that same look he had given her when he picked them up. He got up out of the seat and leaned down to Rachel putting one hand on the table and the other rested on the back of her chair. His lips brushed against her right ear. The smell of his cologne was mesmerizing. His breath against her sent her insides into convulsions.

"Don't flatter yourself." He whispered before walking away. Rachel just sat in her seat. Not sure of what to do next. Her stomach felt sick and she decided the best thing was to head to the bathroom.

"That was the quickest game I have ever played. Thank you Baggy." Joe put his hand out to Baggy. Baggy made an annoyed face and grunted as he put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a twenty dollar bill. He slammed it in Joe's hand and walked away.

"Look at my man." Nicole said grabbing Joe's shirt pulling him close to her. He leaned down and kissed her.

"So, I was thinking. How about you come spend the night?" Joe asked smiling.

"You know I was thinking the same thing." Nicole smiled back.

"What about your friend?" Joe asked.

"No, she can't spend the night. You're all mine." Nicole joked.

"You know what I mean."

"I'll give her cab money. She'll understand." Nicole kissed Joe. She pulled away suddenly.

"Speaking of my friend. Where is she?" Nicole sat up scanning the bar for Rachel.

"Last time I seen her she was running to the bathroom. She did drink those drinks pretty fast." Joe said.

"Ok. Let me go see if she's ok." Nicole walked to the bathroom and knocked. No one answered. "Rachel." She said. She pushed the door open. No one was inside. Nicole panicked and walked back to Joe.

"She isn't in there." Nicole said.

"What do you mean? Where else would she be?" Joe walked over to the guys.

"Hey, did any of you see where Rachel went?" Joe asked.

"Yeah I seen her." Spink said laughing. "I seen her walk out the front door. I also seen Baggy walk out right behind her." Spink started laughing hysterical. The rest of the guys chimed in.

"Told you she was a whore." Tommy said to Joe.

"Shut the fuck up Tommy. You don't know anything about her." Nicole said than started for the front door. Joe grabbed her arm.

"Let me go look for her. I don't want to fight with anyone tonight and if you go out there someone may say something and then, well you know what will happen." Joe was about to open the door when Billy stopped him.

"Stay with your girl." He pointed to Nicole. Joe moved aside and let Billy walk out the door. The air was cold. He should have put a jacket on. Billy looked around the parking lot. No one was around. _Where did she go_? Billy thought. He knew that Baggy wasn't the best person for a drunken girl to be alone with. Billy started to walk back to the bar when he thought about checking the back of the building. He couldn't see why she would go there but it was worth a shot. As he got closer to the back he could hear people talking. Then he heard a faint scream. Billy walked faster and turned the corner.

"Get off of me!" Rachel screamed as Baggy had her pinned up to the wall. His hands were ripping at her jeans and pushing up her sweater. He was kissing her face and mouth and Rachel put her head to the side to stop him. Baggy was frustrated and grabbed her face.

"You've been fuckin teasin me all night. No more playin around!" He yelled. He kissed her mouth so hard Rachel could taste blood. Suddenly he was off of her and on the floor. Billy was standing over him.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you that desperate that now your forcing girls to fuck you?" Rachel couldn't believe how Billy looked. This was the craziest she had seen him. His eyes were wide, he was breathing heavy and he was screaming at Baggy.

"Billy, are you fuckin kiddin me?" Baggy pulled himself to his feet and wiped his clothes off.

"Go the fuck back inside!" Billy yelled. Baggy zipped up his pants and headed back to the bar. Rachel couldn't move. She couldn't believe what just happened. She looked over at Billy who was already looking at her.

"Are you fuckin stupid comin out here alone?" He was still breathing heavy but no longer yelling.

"I…I just needed air." Rachel whispered. Tears had formed in her eyes.

"Fix yourself." Billy pointed to her clothes. "Then go wait by my car. I'm bringin you home." She looked down to see her pants unbuttoned and her sweater was pushed above her stomach. Billy walked away and headed back in the bar. He walked straight to Baggy and grabbed him by his collar.

"I ever see you do somethin like that again and I'll fuckin kill you." Their noses were almost touching. Baggy nodded his head slowly.

"What happened? What did he do? Where's Rachel?" Nicole grabbed Billy's arm. He let go of Baggy and walked over to Rachel's jacket. He grabbed it so hard the chair it was on fell to the floor.

"I'm takin her home. You need a ride?" He asked Nicole.

"No I'm going home with your brother. What happened Billy?"

"Don't worry about it right now. She's fine. Let her tell you tomorrow." Billy pushed the door open so hard it slammed on the outside wall. Rachel jumped when she heard the bang. She watched as Billy walked over to his car. His face was angry. He threw her coat at her and got in his car. He opened the lock for her and she got in. Rachel put her coat on and pulled it tightly over her chest. She kept her eyes down. Billy started the car and pulled out of the parking lot. Rachel no longer felt drunk. She felt embarrassed and violated. Halfway to her house Billy finally spoke.

"You shouldn't come to the bar anymore." He said in his deep voice. Rachel looked over at him. "My boys can't keep their hands off you." He stopped at a red light and looked over at her.

"Ok." Rachel whispered to him. The light turned green and he sped off. The rest of the ride they were silent. When he pulled in front of her house he didn't say anything. Rachel opened the car door and was about to get out when she looked at Billy.

"Thank you. Again." Billy nodded his head but kept his eyes away from her. Why wouldn't he look at her? Rachel climbed slowly out of the car and shut the door. Billy pulled away before she could turn around. Rachel quickly opened her front door and ran to her room. She ripped her clothes off and went in the shower. When she got out she went to the basement and put her clothes in the wash. She wanted the smell of Baggy off of her and her clothes. She went back to her room and lay down to go to sleep. The faster she went to sleep the faster tomorrow would come.

The next day Nicole called her when she got home to ask her what happened. She told her how she felt sick after Billy and her had the shots of whiskey and that she ran to the bathroom. She didn't feel sick anymore but was desperate for fresh air. She walked out of the bar unnoticed. So she thought. Baggy had come out cursing under his breath about the pool game with Joe and seen her leaning against the wall. He had walked over to her and they were just talking. The next thing she knew he was kissing her. At first she let him but then she realized what she was doing and asked him to stop. He got mad and pushed himself against her. He was trying to take her pants off and then he was thrown on the floor by Billy.

"I can't believe I didn't notice you leave! I'm sorry I ever asked you to come there." Nicole said.

"I wanted to go. It's fine anyway. Billy asked me not to go there anymore." Rachel said.

"He did? Well, I guess you wouldn't want to anyway. For God sakes, what would have happened if Billy didn't help you? I'm so sorry Rachel." Rachel could hear Nicole starting to cry.

"Nicole please don't cry. Its ok, I'm ok. I want to go back to sleep. Do you mind if I call you later?""

"No of course not. Go to back to sleep. If you need anything just call me." Nicole said.

"I know. Listen, do me a favor and don't tell Brooke and Daniela about this ok?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing. That's the last thing you need is to hear their preaching." They both laughed. They said good-bye and hung up the phone. Rachel went back to bed and fell asleep. She was slightly hung over and had a bad headache. Her father had tried to talk to her throughout the day but Rachel just told him she didn't feel well. School started this week and for the most part she was excited. She was hoping that she would sleep straight until Tuesday. But that didn't happen.

She had spent the entire day on Monday getting ready for school. Tuesday morning had finally come and Nicole and Rachel took the bus together. They met up with Brooke and Daniela after homeroom.

"Well there she is." Brooke grabbed Rachel and hugged her.

"So you are an official St. Theresaian." Daniela laughed.

"I know isn't it exciting!" Rachel said. She put her arm around Daniela and started walking down the hall to class.

"Well ladies, I would love to stay but I have to go to cheerleading. Love you!" Nicole blew kisses to her friends then disappeared into the stairwell.

"Yes girls I must go too." Brooke kissed Rachel and Daniela on their cheeks and headed in her classroom.

"Thank god I have most of my classes with you." Rachel said to Daniela.

"Yeah, I'll take good care of ya." They both laughed.

Her first day of school went by surprisingly fast. She spent lunch with her friends and had one class with Nicole. After 7th period Rachel and Daniela met up with Brooke in the front of school.

"Where's Nicole?" Rachel asked.

"Her boyfriend is picking her up today." Brooke said pointing to the street. Rachel looked to see Nicole running to Joe. Next to them was Billy's car. Billy got out and walked over to them. Rachel's heart began to beat faster. _Why was she like this around him? He was no good for her. _His long brown trench coat fit his broad shoulders perfectly. He was smoking a cigarette which he makes look sexy. He was laughing and showing those perfect teeth. A similar car to his pulled up behind Billy's. It was red with black flames. Bodie, Tommy, Spink and Baggy poured out and walked to Billy.

"Can you believe these guys?" Brooke made a disgusted face at them.

"I know. Nicole has them pick her up almost every day. They get out of the car to almost show off. I mean everyone knows who they are. Shit, half of these kids buy drugs from them." Daniela added.

"Well, that's Nicole for you. She's going to fuck up her good future for that guy." Brooke was always critiquing everyone. But you would think she would be less critical about one of her best friends.

"He really cares about her." Rachel snapped.

"Of course you would come to his defense. You're in love with his brother." Brooke said.

"What are you talking about? I'm not in love with anyone." Rachel loved Brooke but truly couldn't stand when she got like this. She had a holier than thou attitude.

"Come on Rachel. We seen how you looked at him at the bar the other night. Then we hear you and Nicole went out to that shit whole of a bar on Saturday too. We're your friends. We know when you got the hots for someone." Brooke laughed.

"You guys don't know what you're talking about." Rachel looked away from Brooke. She started to get angry at her friends accusations.

"Hey Ray, isn't that your dad's truck?" Daniela pointed to the street. Her father's truck was parked right in front of Billy's car. Rachel could see Billy look at it. He must have recognized it.

"What the hell is he doing here?" Her father honked his horn and waved at her. She waved back and signaled for him to wait.

"Must be a bad if he's home already. I'll call you guys later." Rachel waved to her friends than walked down the stairs to the sidewalk. She pulled her books closer to her chest and put her head down in hopes that no one would recognize her.

"Rachel?" She heard Joe say. Rachel stopped knowing there was no way out of this. She looked up and smiled. She looked back at her father and put her finger up to tell him to give her a minute. Nicole ran over to Rachel and hugged her.

"I'm sorry I didn't know he was bringing everyone. I just yelled at him for it." Nicole said.

"It's ok. I told you I was fine. My dad is here to pick me up so it must be important. I'll call you later?" Rachel smiled.

"Please make sure you do." Nicole kissed her and hugged her. Rachel looked up to see Billy looking back at her. He was leaning on the roof of his car smoking a cigarette. He nodded at Rachel and she smiled back. Nicole let go of her and walked over to the passenger window on Rachel's father's truck. He put the window down.

"Nicole. How are you?" Mr. Hedlund asked.

"I'm doing really good Mr. Hedlund. How are you?"

"Busy. So where are you headed for college next year?"

"Actually I am staying here, at least for a couple of years. Then we will see."

"I'm hoping your friend over there stays here too for college. It would be nice having her around for awhile." They laughed.

"It was nice seeing you again Mr. Hedlund. I have to go." She waved at him then kissed Rachel on the cheek. She ran to Billy's car and got in. Billy and his gang sped off up the block. Rachel's father watched them.

"So are those the guys you keep hanging out with?"

"Dad, please I'm really not in the mood."

"Fine." He said as he pulled away from the school.

"Why aren't you at work?"

"I'm finishing work at home tonight. But we have something to talk about."

"Great, what now?"

"Well, Mr. Harlan needs me to go away on business for a little while."

"You're kidding me right? Dad I just started school. What do you want me to do?"

"Actually I was going to let you stay here while I'm gone." Rachel was quiet for a moment. She looked at her father with question.

"For how long?"

"Two months."

"Two months? What the hell am I going to do in that house for two months?"

"I was thinking that maybe Nicole can come stay with you while I'm gone. I already talked to her mother about it yesterday and she was ok with it. I originally said for you to stay at Nicole's but I knew how that would go."

"Well when are you leaving?"

"A week after your birthday."

"Oh my God you're going to miss my fucking graduation!" Rachel yelled.

"Rachel! Do not _ever_ speak to me like that again." Rachel looked out the window wishing even more at that moment that her mother was there to hold her. It was bad enough her mother wasn't going to see her daughter walk to get her diploma but now her father wasn't going to be there either.

"We'll talk more about this after dinner." Her father said. Rachel didn't want to talk about it later.

"It's fine dad. Nicole will stay with me. I'm sure she won't mind. Her parents will be right across the street. I don't want to argue with you."

"I'm going to try to come just for graduation. Rachel I'm sorry this is happening but I have no other choice. This is my career and without it I can't take care of you." His tone was soothing and comforting. She knew he had to go. She would make the best of it.


	3. Chapter 3

**R**achel put her head in her hands as she sat at the dining room table. She let out a deep sigh. Her school books were piled in front of her. Her school uniform was still on and her shirt was half tucked in and half hanging over her skirt. She looked disheveled. Her hair was falling out of her lose bun she managed to put up. She had been in that same seat since she arrived home that afternoon. Her father had called to tell her he would be very late coming home and to make herself something for dinner. How could she eat with all this homework? The past two months had been jammed with homework and projects from each class. Rachel had hardly seen her friends outside of school. Nicole was always with Joe or at cheerleading practice, while Brooke and Daniela had their own after school activities. Rachel let out another exhausted sigh and pushed herself away from the table. She slowly pushed herself up and stretched. "It's Friday, why I am I doing this to myself?" She said out loud. She headed towards the kitchen when the doorbell rang. _Who could that be_? She thought to herself before looking at the time. Nine-forty. She walked to the door and opened it. There stood her three friends with smiles on their faces.

"What?" Rachel asked smiling. They looked like they had something to say but were waiting for her to talk first. Daniela looked at her watch and began to count down. The other two chimed in.

"10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1……..Happy Birthday Rachel!" The three girls screamed loudly. Rachel was so caught up with her school work she had forgotten about their tradition. Every year since she met them, the girls would get together and sing happy birthday to each other on the exact minute they were born. Nicole grabbed Rachel by her shirt and pulled her into a tight hug. Brooke and Daniela joined in. Rachel moved aside for the girls to enter.

"I bet you forgot didn't you." Nicole said with raised eyebrows as she took her jacket off. They all went into the dining room and sat down.

"You know what, I did." Rachel said smiling.

"We figured. And that made it easier for us." Brooke put a box on the table. She opened it. A beautiful birthday cake was inside. It was all white with blue gel writing. It read, 'Happy 18th Birthday Rachel, The Bestest Friend Us Girls Could Ask For'. Rachel smiled at her friends. Daniela pulled out candles and placed 19 candles on the cake.

"Ah, you do know that I'm 18, right?" Rachel said pointing to the extra candle.

"Well, this year we felt you needed something different. So you have 18 candles and one extra for good luck towards your wish." Daniela said as she lit the candles. "Ok, let's sing." The three girls began singing happy birthday. When they finished Nicole said to make a wish, and make it count. Rachel looked down at the blaze of candles. Suddenly the most unexpected image shown clear in her head, she knew what she was going to wish for. She inhaled deep and let her air out over the candles. They all blew out in one shot. The corner of Rachel's mouth curled up. She didn't believe in superstition, but it was nice to make believe.

"Rachel, I'm home!" Her father yelled from the front door.

"In the dining room dad." She yelled. Mr. Hedlund walked into the dining room.

"Oh hi girls." He looked down at the cake. "Oh good I didn't miss anything." Brooke left for the kitchen and had come back with plates and forks. She cut everyone a slice and they all began to eat.

"This cake is really good." Mr. Hedlund said as he put his plate down. He seemed weird to Rachel. He was fidgeting in his seat and had barely looked at her other then to say happy birthday and give her a hug. Rachel reached over to her father, resting her hand on his arm.

"Dad, is everything ok?" Mr. Hedlund sucked in his breath and let it out slowly. He closed his eyes and put his head down. When he opened them again he looked over at his daughter.

"I have bad news. The company needs me to leave earlier then expected." Rachel sat back in her chair. She looked over at her friends who now looked at each other.

"Well, what's earlier?" She said looking down.

"Tonight." Rachel's eyes shot up to her father's face. She wanted to yell, she wanted to scream. But she knew he had no choice. She knew his job was all they had and he couldn't afford to lose it. She took in a deep breath and let it out. She straightened her back and tried to smile at her father.

"It's ok." Rachel looked over to Nicole. "Could you stay over tonight?"

"Of course. I'll go now to pack a bag." Nicole looked to Brooke and Daniela. "You guys want to come with?" They nodded their heads and left for Nicole's. Rachel stood up and walked into the kitchen to get a drink. Her father followed.

"I have good news also." Rachel grabbed a bottle of water from the frig. She opened it and leaned against the counter, looking at her father. "I won't be gone for two months. My boss said if I left tonight I would only have to go for a couple of weeks. I won't miss graduation." He stood there, frozen. Not knowing what his daughter was going to say. Rachel smiled and walked quickly to her father throwing her arms around his neck. "Thank you." She whispered in his ear. He hugged his daughter tightly, tears forming in his eyes. Rachel pulled away and whipped the tears from her cheeks.

"You just made my whole week." She laughed. "What time are you leaving? Do you need a ride to the airport?" Rachel's smile refused to leave.

"No, the company is sending a car to pick me up and," he looked down at his watch "they will be here in about 20 minutes." He walked past her into his office that was off of the kitchen. He grabbed three bags off the floor and walked to the front door. He grabbed his jacket and reached in the left pocket. He pulled out a long white envelope with Rachel's name on it. He looked down at his daughter, smiled then handed her the envelope.

"What's this?" She said smiling.

"Happy Birthday Rachel." She opened the envelope to find five hundred dollar bills inside. Her eyes widened and she looked up at her father.

"Dad, are you crazy. This is _way_ too much." She said handing him back the envelope. She knew that amount of money was hurting him. She couldn't live with herself taking it.

"No!" He said sternly pushing the envelope back to her. "I've been saving. Do what you will with it. Go shopping, do whatever you girls do. You deserve it." He kissed her forehead. She bit her lip to help from crying.

"My credit cards are in my study and the emergency cash is in my nightstand. Use the emergency cash for food and gas. Don't use _your_ money." They heard a honk outside and her father opened the door. "Have a good weekend and have fun. I'm sorry I am leaving so quickly but I'm already late. I love you." He hugged his daughter and kissed her on the cheek. She told him she loved him and walked with him to the curb. Nicole, Brooke and Daniela were walking back across the street.

"Bye girls. I will see you in a couple of weeks. Take care of my daughter and my house please." The girls laughed and said their goodbyes. They all waved as Mr. Hedlund got in the car and drove off. Nicole looked over at Rachel with a grin.

"What?" Rachel said narrowing her eyebrows. That look was never good.

"Nothing." Nicole smiled at Rachel and then walked up the walkway. Brooke and Daniela followed. Rachel looked down the block and watched her father's car until it turned. She sighed lightly to herself then ran into her house.

Brooke and Daniela stayed for a couple of hours then headed home. Nicole started to help Rachel clean up when Nicole's cell phone rang. She ran to her bag and picked it up.

"Hello." Nicole looked over at Rachel. "Um, well. Hold on a sec." Nicole took a deep breath and walked over to her friend. Rachel squinted her eyes knowing she was up to something. "What?" Rachel asked.

"It's Joe. He wants to know what we're doing tonight. And he said Happy Birthday." Rachel put her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows. Nicole smiled like a little kid. Rachel wanted to say she didn't feel like doing anything, but then she would be lying. With all the school work and never leaving the house she needed a break. Today was her birthday, why not have some fun.

"Tell him thanks, and what exactly does he have in mind?" Nicole got back on the phone. They talked for a minute then she told him to hang on.

"Wants to know if he can come here?" Rachel, who was now cleaning again stopped and shook her head no to Nicole. "My father will kill us both." Rachel whispered. She didn't want Joe to hear. Nicole nodded, agreeing with her. She went back on the phone and talked for a few more minutes. She pulled the phone away covering the receiver.

"He said we can go to his place, and he'll pick us up." Rachel nodded. She knew she wasn't going back to the Four Roses after Billy told her not to. There really wasn't anywhere left for the three of them to hang out. Rachel walked into the kitchen as Nicole finished her conversation with Joe. She was hoping that Billy wasn't going to show up. She had seen him a few times the past couple of months. At first he would nod, and then he wouldn't even look her way. She still couldn't understand why she cared, but she did. Billy was everything she needed to stay away from. He was a thief, a drug dealer and from the most recent rumors circulating, a killer. The more stories she heard of him and his gang, the more interested she became. Joe was different. He wanted so desperately for his brother to respect him, he would do anything. But Rachel could tell he did the things he did because he was told. Not because he wanted to. He would stab you just as quick as his brother, but he would need better reason. He protected Nicole from that part of his life.

"He was on his cell, and he's close to the neighborhood so you don't have long to get ready." Nicole said looking at Rachel's school uniform. "Go, I'll finish cleaning." Nicole grabbed the plates from her hand and motioned for her to go change. Rachel ran upstairs and grabbed her light gray velour tracksuit and jumped in the shower. Fifteen minutes later she was out of the shower and drying her hair. She knew they were only going to Joe's apartment but she didn't want to look like shit on her birthday. Rachel looked over at her alarm clock. "Not my birthday anymore." She said out loud. The clock read 12:34am. Rachel put her makeup on then walked over to her mother's picture. "I love you Mom." She kissed the picture and placed it back. She headed downstairs and looked over the place. Nicole had really cleaned for her.

"Hey, thank you. You didn't need to do this." Rachel motioned around the living room. Nicole was putting her jacket on.

"No biggie. I didn't want you to have to do anything. It may not be officially your birthday anymore, but we haven't even celebrated yet." Nicole handed Rachel her jacket and they went out the front door. Rachel locked the door and they sat on the steps. The air was cold but felt good on Rachel's lungs. Nicole pulled out a cigarette and lit it. She motioned it to Rachel. She made a disgusted face and pushed Nicole's hand away.

"That's right, you say no." Nicole laughed. Rachel smiled. They both stood up when Billy's car pulled up. Her heart fell into her stomach and her breathing became heavy. Why was she getting this way? It had been a couple of weeks since she had seen him at school and the thought of him getting out of the car right now was exciting. _Stop this_! She scolded herself. They walked over to the car. Joe got out of the drivers seat to let Nicole and Rachel in. He gave her a hug and said Happy Birthday again. "We're gonna get your ass hammered tonight." He said laughing. Nicole got in first, then Rachel. She looked in the passenger seat and a guy around Joe's age was looking back at them. He was really good looking and had a great smile. His brown hair was all over the place and he had bright green eyes.

"Hey Nicole." The guy said.

"Hey Mike. This is my friend Rachel." Mike looked over to Rachel and said hello. "It was her birthday today."

"Happy Birthday." He said then turned around. The drive was heavy with conversation. Mike asked how old she was, and smirked when she said 18. Nicole smiled at the instant noticeable attraction the two had for each other. They were now in the city and driving in the same direction as the bar. Rachel began to get nervous when the bar came into few. She could see various cars in the parking lot, one of which belonged to Heco. Several blocks away they pulled in front of an apartment building. Mike got out then let the girls out.

"Ah, home sweet home." Joe said grabbing Nicole's waist. He leaned down and kissed her. Then he led her to an outside staircase that led into the building. Rachel followed them as they walked up the stairs to the second floor. They walked down a long hall and stopped in front of one of the doors. Joe opened the door and led them in. The apartment was decently big. There was a large living room with an eat-in kitchen. There was a long hall straight ahead that had four closed doors. The place was bare other then the furniture. No photos or décor of any kind. Nicole walked to the oversized couch and motioned for Rachel to join her.

"Well?" Nicole asked in a low tone.

"Well what?" Rachel asked. Nicole looked over at Joe and Mike in the kitchen. They were grabbing bottles of liquor from one of the cabinets. She looked over at Rachel and smiled.

"What do you think about Mike?"

"He's nice, and definitely something to look at." Rachel smiled.

"Alright, we're going to celebrate Rachel's birthday the right way." Joe said as him and Mike grabbed two chairs from the table and placed them across from the girls. They placed the several bottles of liquor on the beat up coffee table. Rachel smiled with excitement. Unfortunately drinking was something she highly enjoyed.

"Is this all you have?" Rachel asked, pointing to the bottles of vodka and whiskey.

"Hey, this is all my brother drinks so; yeah this is all we got." Joe walked back into the kitchen and grabbed some ice.

"So your brother tells you what kind of liquor to keep in your apartment?" Rachel asked. Joe and Mike started to laugh.

"My apartment?" He shook his head lightly still laughing. "No this isn't my apartment this is _his_ apartment." Rachel's stomach dropped. She was in his apartment? He could come home at any moment. Rachel looked over at the front door, thinking he was going to walk in.

"I thought you said you this was your place?" Rachel said looking back at Joe and clearing her throat.

"Well, I do live here. But it's my brother's apartment." Joe said pouring himself a shot of vodka. He poured some for Nicole and Mike. "What'll you have?" Rachel thought for a second and realized she hated straight vodka more then whiskey.

"I'll have some whiskey. Straight vodka always makes me sick." He poured her some whiskey and he put his cup out for them to toast. "Happy Birthday Rachel!" He said. Nicole and Mike followed. They all took shots and the night was beginning. Mike had called a few extra people to come over. His sister Lisa and her friend Jessica and Lisa's boyfriend Charlie came with some beer and cranberry juice, by Rachel's request. The whiskey was starting to leave a bad taste in her mouth. Joe made her a drink of vodka and cranberry and made everyone give another toast. An hour later Rachel was feeling drunk and enjoying every minute of it. Lisa talked with Nicole and Rachel most of the time while Jessica sort of stayed to herself. She didn't look like she was having a good time. Mike was drunk and definitely enjoying Rachel's company. A couple of times he tried to kiss her, but Rachel liked to play hard to get. She would give him her "bedroom eyes" and make him sigh loudly.

"You're killing me." He whispered in her ear. Rachel smiled and walked back over to her friend, leaving Mike to his thoughts.

"Oh man, you are makin' my boy crazy with all you're teasin'." Joe said pulling Nicole down on his lap. Nicole began laughing, showing how drunk she was. Rachel sat on the coffee table in front of them.

"Yup, that's me. A big ol' tease." They began to laugh when the front door flew open. Rachel and Nicole jumped and Joe pushed Nicole off of him, falling onto Rachel.

"Who the fuck are you people?" Billy stood at the doorway. His eyes angrily cutting through each face. Bodie, Heco and Spink were with him. They looked like madmen. Billy's fitted black shirt was heaving up and down as he breathed heavily. His nostrils were flaring and his jaw was clenched. His eyes began to search the room and they landed on Rachel. His narrowed eyes loosened and his expression turned from fierce to surprise. Rachel almost smiled. But she decided not to. Billy's eyes hardened again when he saw his brother. "What the fuck are you doing?" He demanded.

"You weren't supposed to be home until later." Joe said. He got off the couch and was walking to his brother. He was visibly shaken.

"So you decided to have a party while I'm gone?

"Well, its Rachel's birthday and we can't go to the bar because you banned her from it." Joe laughed at himself. Billy looked back at Rachel whose eyes were to the floor. He kept his eyes on her for several seconds. "Fine." He said looking back at Joe. "Let's party then." Billy took his coat off and placed it on the kitchen table. Heco and Spink started raiding the frig. Rachel looked up at Nicole who was now sitting on the couch. Nicole smiled and kissed her on the cheek. Bodie came over to Rachel. He tapped her on her shoulder and motioned for her to stand up. "It's not every day I get to say happy birthday to something as beautiful as you." He leaned in and kissed her on her cheek. He grabbed her into a hug and said happy birthday. Rachel laughed, letting the fear she was feeling slowly leave. She caught Billy's gaze from across the room. He looked away and walked over to the radio. After putting on a rock station he grabbed a chair from the kitchen and placed it near the couch. Sitting next to him was Jessica. He looked over to her. "Who're you?" Jessica raised her eyes to Billy and cleared her throat. Suddenly she didn't look so bored.

"Jessica. But my friends call me Jesse." She smirked. Billy smirked back. He placed his eyes to Rachel who was sitting back on the coffee table.

"You break it, you bought it." Billy said pointing to the table. His voice was deeper then usual and raspy. Rachel looked down at the table and then back at Billy.

"Sorry." She said standing up. Mike caught her eye. He was standing by the window talking to Charlie. She walked over to him avoiding Billy's stare. Billy watched Rachel as she walked over to his brother's friend. His anger started to rise as they smiled at each other. Mike grabbed the back of Rachel's neck, and for a split second Billy thought he was going to kiss her. Instead he whispered in her ear. Rachel's smile faded and she pushed Mike away. Pointing her finger in his face, and then laughing. Billy looked back at Jessica who was smiling at him.

"What?" He asked, clearly angry.

"You like her huh?" Jessica asked, nodding towards Rachel.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"It's obvious." She laughed.

"Nothin's obvious." Billy reached down to the table and poured himself some whiskey. He leaned back and lit a cigarette, letting it hang out the side of his mouth. He looked back at Jessica. She was pretty, with black hair and brown eyes. She had full lips and a nice figure. Billy looked her up and down.

"So, then you get that look in your eye every time a girl talks to another guy?" Jessica leaned closer to Billy. She was intrigued by him. He had the most intense eyes. They could cut right through you. He was sexy and rugged and was definitely feared by his peers. Every move they made they looked for his approval first. _That Rachel girl is lucky_. She thought to herself. _He looks at her with such passion_.

"You jealous?" Billy asked taking a deep drag of his cigarette, blowing the smoke in Jessica's direction.

"Maybe." She said, giving him a flirty smile.

Rachel glanced over at Billy and Jessica. The bored silent girl was in a full conversation with Billy. She was clearly flirting, touching the tattoos on his arm as if that was where her interest was. Rachel started feeling angry. One of the many reasons she shouldn't drink. She looked back over to Mike who was still talking to her. She wasn't sure about what. Billy was the only thing she could think about. _Why wasn't he talking to her? What was so interesting about Jessica?_

"…..so, you wanna get outa here?" Mike leaned close to Rachel's face. Her eyes widened. He _was_ really attractive.

"Leave? Why would I leave?" Rachel asked.

"So we can be alone. I live in this building. I'm on the next floor." Mike touched her cheek. A slight chill fell down her stomach. Her head turned to the side, facing Billy. He was looking right at her with the same face he gave her the first night at the bar. _If looks could kill I'd be dead_. She thought. Then Rachel did something she would regret. The corner of her mouth raised and her eyebrow went up. The smirk she gave Billy had worked. His eyes were looking at her with anger and she could see his jaw tense up. She put her arms around Mike while still looking at Billy. Mike grabbed her chin and pulled her face to his. He began to kiss her. She didn't protest. Even with the faces Billy was giving her, she didn't think he was actually going to get jealous. Billy didn't look like the type of guy that could get jealous. Rachel continued kissing Mike as if they were the only ones in the room. His hands began to roam her body. Suddenly this wasn't feeling good anymore. She pulled his hand off of her leg, and then she pulled his other one off of her breast. She turned her head to the side.

"Listen." Rachel said pushing Mike off of her but not trying to grab unwanted attention. Mike pulled away and apologized. He asked her again if she wanted to leave with him. Rachel looked at him and then looked around the room. Billy wasn't sitting anymore. Now he was in the kitchen talking to Bodie and Heco with his back facing her. Heco was staring at Mike, which made Rachel uneasy.

"Yeah, maybe we should leave." What was she thinking? She had no intensions of having sex with him, but she knew that is what he wanted. "Let me go to the bathroom and then we'll go." Rachel walked to the bathroom and closed the door behind her. She put the water on and started dabbing her face. She looked at herself in the mirror. There was no way she could leave with him. He was going to try to go further with her and she was no match for him. He was tall, built and drunk. Rachel stood up and decided to tell him she wasn't feeling good. As she opened the door she could hear yelling in the living room. She crept down the hall and could see Bodie and Heco arguing with Joe and Mike. Billy was standing in the middle of the living room with his arms crossed over his chest. Jessica was standing right next to him.

"Are you fucking kiddin' me?" Mike yelled.

"Time to go bro." Heco said grabbing Mike's arm and pulling him to the door.

"I didn't fuckin' take it Billy. I wouldn't take anything from you." Mike yelled over his shoulder to Billy. Billy just stood there staring at the window. Heco and Bodie left the apartment with Mike. Rachel walked into the living room towards Nicole.

"What happened?" Rachel whispered. Nicole looked up at her from the couch.

"Billy's missing some drugs and it happens to be Mike's drug of choice." Rachel looked over at Billy who was now talking to Jessica. He had his arm around her shoulder. He must have felt Rachel's stare. His head turned quick to look at her. The same smile she had given him before her make out session with Mike was now spread across his face. Rachel's anger grew and she walked quickly to her jacket and put it on.

"Where are you going?" Nicole said.

"To find Mike." She walked up to Billy and looked him in his eyes.

"Piece of shit." Rachel said. The smirk was off his face; in its place was anger. She walked to the front door as Heco and Bodie walked in. She brushed past them and headed down the hall. She remembered him saying his apartment was on the next floor. She headed towards the stairs. Her heart was pounding and she was no longer feeling drunk. Her anger was rising higher as the seconds past. Billy had done that on purpose. She had to apologize to Mike. She was about to open the stairwell door when she heard heavy footsteps coming down the hall. She turned to see Billy walking fast to her, his sleeves were rolled up and his face was terrifying. His pace became faster. Rachel panicked and ran through the door. She heard him yell her name as she headed up the stairs. She ran up two flights when she was grabbed.

"Get off of me!" Rachel yelled. Billy pushed himself against her. Her breath was cut as her back was slammed against the wall. She tried to move but he was too strong.

"You think you're fuckin' cute don't you?" Billy said. His voice was deep and calm and his breath smelt sweet from whiskey. He grabbed her arms and pinned them to her sides. Their faces only inches apart.

"What are you talking about?" Rachel could barely get the words out.

"Don't fuckin' screw with me."

"Billy you're hurting me. I can't breath."

"You think I didn't catch on to your fuckin' tauntin'?" Rachel was struggling to get away. She wanted to leave and never see him again. He was a monster. Her anger was rising again.

"So what!" She yelled in his face. "What the hell do you care? It's not like you like me or anything. People like you don't like anyone." She tried to push him off again, just to have him press himself harder against her. She groaned as the pain in her back grew stronger.

"I don't like people playin' games with me. Especially lil bitches like you."

"Fuck you!" Rachel started to scream for help. Billy's laughter filled the stairwell.

"No one's gonna help you. It's just you and me." Rachel looked into his eyes to protest when she stopped. She couldn't help how she was feeling. His smile was mischievous, his eyes mesmerizing. Without thought she leaned in and kissed him. He pulled away from her, staring down into her eyes with confusion. His grip on her arms loosened. To her surprise he put his hands on the back of her head and pulled her to his lips. They kissed each other hungrily. Rachel hands roamed his large back. He pushed himself against her again. This time there was no pain in her back. She could make out faint moans escaping his throat as his mouth pushed into hers. She wanted him in ways she had never felt before. What was this power he had over her? Rachel didn't want this to stop. Billy pulled his mouth away from hers and started kissing and sucking on her neck. She closed her eyes enjoying the waves of chills shooting through her body. He looked back at her, staring deep into her eyes. She grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him to her, kissing him. Rachel could hear the sound of a phone ringing in the distance. Billy pulled away.

"Fucking phone!" He yelled as he pulled the phone out of his pocket. He was breathing heavy as he looked down to see who it was. He threw his head back and closed his eyes. "Son of a bitch!" He opened his phone. "What?!" He yelled. Rachel tried to catch her breath. She couldn't believe what just happened. She looked at Billy as he backed up away from her. "What the fuck did you tell him Tommy?" Billy's face turned hard again. He was clearly pissed. He slammed the phone shut and looked up at Rachel. His face softened and he looked away.

"Is everything ok?" She asked. He turned and headed towards the door.

"I gotta go." He opened the door and waited for her to follow. He held the door open as Rachel walked through. She had just felt the most amazing feelings, some of which she never knew existed.

"Where are you going?" Rachel looked over at Billy. He looked back at her with his eyes narrowed.

"Out." Was all he said. They walked back to the apartment and went inside. Charlie, Lisa and Jessica were gone. Nicole and Joe were gone too. Heco and Bodie were playing cards while Spink was smoking a joint.

"Where's my brother?" Billy asked Bodie.

"Getting' it on with his girl, I'm guessin'." Bodie said laughing.

"We gotta go, Tommy fucked up. He seen Bones at one of the corners." Billy grabbed his coat and put it on. He looked over at Rachel. "Do you need a ride home?"

"Um, ok."

"Can you wait till' I get back?" He asked grabbing his cigarettes.

"Sure." Rachel walked over to the couch and sat down. Now she was tired and feeling the drunk feeling again. Billy, Bodie, Heco and Spink left the apartment. She took her jacket off and lay down on the couch. She closed her eyes and replayed their encounter in the stairwell and a smile spread across her face._ I guess that extra candle helped me get my birthday wish after all._ She thought to herself. Within minutes Rachel was asleep.

Billy walked down the hall to his apartment. His head was spinning with thoughts of Rachel and of how stupid Tommy was, telling Bones he was the only one working tonight. Billy knew Bones was going to give him hell for that. He took his keys out and opened the door. He could see her as soon as he stepped in. She was on her back with her ankles crossed and using her jacket as a cover. She looked as if she was sleeping for some time. He closed the door and locket it, took his jacket off and placed it on a chair. He walked in front of her, looking down at her while she slept. He thought of waking her but she looked too peaceful. He smiled to himself and walked down the hall to his room. He got undressed and sat on his bed. He rubbed his shaved head and thought about Rachel. What was happening to him? He had never felt this way before for anyone. Ever since the first night at the bar he has thought about her. He pictured her sleeping on the couch. How uncomfortable she would be in the morning. He stood up and walked back down the hall into the living room. He leaned down and picked Rachel up in his arms and walked her to his room. He laid her gently on his bed and removed her sneakers. Slowly he got into bed and faced her. She moaned slightly in her sleep which made Billy laugh. He moved a piece of hair off of her face. She was beautiful. He knew this wasn't going to end well for either of them, but he couldn't help but feel something for her. "Happy Birthday." He said. He looked over her one last time before he drifted to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**B**illy's eyes slowly opened as the morning light fell over him. His right arm hurt when he tried to move it, he must have slept on it all night. He let out a deep sigh and rolled over onto his back. The heavy pain that was in his arm was unbearable. He lifted it above his head and rotated it a few times. He cringed as the life slowly slipped back into it sending pins and needles viciously attacking his arm. His arm touched something as he placed it on the bed, forcing his eyes to his right. The girl next to him was sleeping on her stomach. The back of her head was facing him and her long dark brown hair was flowing across the pillow. She was wearing a tight white tank top. Billy lifted the covers to reveal her bottom half. To his dismay she was dressed wearing light gray velour pants. He placed the cover back over her and looked up at the ceiling. Images of the night before crept back into his memory. Slowly he raised himself out of bed, in hopes of not waking Rachel. He looked down realizing he was practically naked. He walked over to his dresser and pulled out a pair of gray sweatpants and a black t-shirt, putting them on quickly. He needed coffee. Walking across the wooden floor and not waking her was going to be a mission. He slowly crept to the door and opened it then closing it behind him as slow as he could. He walked to the kitchen and made a pot of coffee. It was around ten in the morning and he knew the paper boy had come. He went out his front door and walked down the hall and took the paper from one of his neighbors. No reason he should pay for it when he could get it for free.

"Mornin'." Joe said to Billy as he sat at the kitchen table across from him. He grabbed his brother's cigarettes and lit one. Billy looked up at Joe and narrowed his eyes.

"Put some fuckin' clothes on." He said, looking back down at the paper. "Rachel's here." 

"I didn't see her when I went to take a piss." Joe said letting out the inhaled smoke as he spoke.

"Cause she was in my room." Joe started to laugh. Billy looked up at him, raising his eyebrows.

"What's so fuckin' funny Joe?" Billy said, his cigarette hanging out of the corner of his mouth.

"So, how was she?" Joe leaned closer to his brother with a smile spread across his face Billy's stern expression stayed the same. Joe leaned back. "C'mon Billy. She's fuckin' hot. There's no way you stayed in that room all night in the same bed with her and didn't get any." Billy looked back down at his paper, ignoring his brother's question.

"Who's hot?" Nicole asked walking over to Joe, kissing him.

"Your friend Rachel spent the night in my brother's bed." Nicole sleepy eyes shot up at Billy.

"What?" Nicole said, sitting down between Joe and Billy. Her eyes narrowed. 

"Relax Nic, nothing happened." Billy said.

"I didn't say anything." Nicole opened her pack of cigarettes and lit one. 

"You didn't have to." Billy said as he got up to get another cup of coffee. He sat back down and looked over at his brother. "We got work to do today."

"Yeah, I know." Joe said annoyed. He finished his cigarette and headed back to his room. Billy looked over to Nicole who was playing with a piece of her blonde hair.

"What if I told you I lied?" Billy asked. Nicole looked up at Billy.

"Lied about what?"

"About nothin' happenin' between me and your friend." The corner of Billy's mouth slowly rose.

"Well, who she sleeps with is none of my business. She's a big girl. She knows what she's getting herself into." Nicole was lying through her teeth. She didn't want Rachel being with Billy like that. She had warned her once already. Billy was known for spreading his love to anyone who would accept it, which was everyone. Rachel also knew about the lifestyle Billy chose and Rachel was way too good for that.

Billy slammed the paper on the table making Nicole jump. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" She leaned back in her chair. She knew not to piss Billy off and she hadn't, until now. "What, is she too good for me?"

"Do I really need to answer that?" Nicole asked. Billy was about to say something to Nicole when Rachel walked into the living room. Nicole could see the angry look in Billy's eyes soften as he looked past her. She turned to see Rachel walking over to them.

"Good morning sleeping beauty." Nicole said.

"Morning." She sat across from Billy, looking at him for a second then over to Nicole.

"So, how'd you sleep?" Nicole asked.

"Um, pretty good I guess." Rachel looked back over to Billy. His eyes were on her.

"How you guys getting home?" He asked. 

"Don't know. Could you take us?" Nicole asked.

"Fine." Billy stood up and walked towards the hall. "You have to come with us first. Then I'll bring you home." Nicole watched as Billy disappeared into his bedroom. She looked over at Rachel.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me Ray!" She whispered.

"What?" Rachel's confusion was clear across her face.

"Didn't I tell you not to get yourself involved with Billy like that?" Nicole's voice raising and then lowering as she said Billy's name.

"I didn't. Well not exactly." Rachel bit her lower lip, remembering their kiss.

"What do you mean, not exactly?"

"Well, when I left to go look for Mike, Billy came after me. We had words in the stairwell and then…. I kissed him."

"_You_ kissed _him_?"

"Yeah, and Nic," Rachel leaned closer to her friend. "It was incredible."

"Ok. Listen I'm not trying to tell you what to do but I know that you're going to get hurt in the end. He isn't one to settle down. I don't think he's ever even had a girlfriend. He just does what he does and then moves on." Nicole shook her head and looked down. "Then again, I was told the same thing about Joe."

"Joe's different from Billy. You can see how much he cares for you." Rachel reassured her friend. She knew Nicole was only looking out for her. Rachel had been through enough. Liking someone who wouldn't like her the same way back was something she didn't need.

"You ladies talkin' about me?" Joe said walking into the kitchen. 

"No, your not _always_ topic of conversation." Nicole said. Joe laughed. 

"Well you better go get ready, we gotta go soon." Joe said. Nicole and Rachel stood up and walked to the hall. Joe and Nicole went into Joe's room and shut the door. Rachel walked to Billy's room. The door was open and he wasn't inside. She could hear the shower on in the bathroom. She looked around the room for the top to her tracksuit. The bed was made and Billy's clothes were spread across it. Black jeans, a black button up and a gray t-shirt. She slowly ran her fingers down his jeans. What was it about him that had her so interested? She sat on the bed and looked down at the floor. One of her sneakers was half under the bed. She knelt down and grabbed it reaching under the bed to find the other. Her hand hit a box and she pulled it out. She looked up at the bedroom door to see if anyone was watching her and then looked back at the box. Her curiosity was taking over and she quickly opened the box. Inside was a gun sticking out of a towel. Her eyes widened and she closed the box quickly and threw it back under the bed. She sat on the bed and took a few deep breaths. She could hear Billy getting out of the bathroom. The closer he got to the room the more her heart pounded. The stories she had heard about him were just stories until now. Her eyes looked up at the door as he walked in. He stopped at the doorway when their eyes met. He was still a little wet from the shower and had one hand on the red towel that was wrapped around his waist. The silver cross he wore around his neck was still on. Rachel couldn't help but look at him. The tribal tattoos that crept up his neck and down his arms were also across his broad chest. He looked dangerous and sexy all at the same time. She was beginning to get that burning feeling she got for him the night before. She had completely forgotten about the gun. Rachel pulled her eyes away from him and looked out the window. Billy walked over to her, looking down at the bed. 

"You're sittin' on my jeans." He pointed with his free hand. Rachel looked down on the bed. She was sitting completely on them. She stood up quickly trying not to look at Billy. He grabbed his clothes and walked on the other side of the bed. Rachel looked back over to him. Their eyes met again as Billy dropped his towel. Rachel's eyes widened at the sight of him naked. She could see every part of his perfect figure. When her eyes rested upon his manhood she turned around with embarrassment. Billy smiled and put his clothes on. Rachel couldn't believe he did that to her. Why did he enjoy getting a reaction out of her? 

"Why're you in here?" He asked.

"My top and my other sneaker, I uh, can't find them." She could feel him near her. She was afraid to turn around. She could hear his footsteps as they walked across the room and then back to her. 

"Here." Rachel slowly turned around. He was dressed and was holding her top. "Your sneakers are under the bed." He leaned down and grabbed her sneaker and handed it to her. He could see she was holding the other one. She quickly put her sneakers and her top on then quickly headed out the bedroom door. Billy followed. Nicole and Joe were already in the kitchen waiting for them.

"Let's go." Billy said. 

"They headed outside and got into Billy's car. Billy sped off in the opposite direction of which she had come the night before. No one spoke the entire ride. Billy turned onto a narrow empty street. A giant iron fence was at the end and they drove through the opening. An old building stood in the middle of the property. Heco's car and a white van were parked in front. Billy looked in his rear view mirror at Rachel. "Stay in the car." He said. She nodded.

"I'll be right back." Joe said turning around kissing Nicole. Joe and Billy walked up the stairs and disappeared into the building.

"What is this place?" Rachel asked. 

"Joe said they call it their "office". Can you imagine?" Nicole laughed.

"Their office huh, and what kind of work do they do exactly?" Rachel looked over at Nicole laughing. Nicole's face dropped.

"Nothing." She said quickly.

"Oh no, no you don't. I want to know." She shoved Nicole.

"Ok, but you have to swear you say nothing." Nicole stuck out her pinky for Rachel. Rachel looked down at it and then wrapped her pinky around Nicole's. 

"You know how Joe sells right?" Rachel nodded and Nicole continued. "Well, he works for his brother, who, well him and the guys, they make the shit here." Nicole pointed at the building. Rachel looked out the window towards the building. She couldn't believe it. They were not only drug dealers, but they also made the drugs to sell. Rachel's curiosity about Billy was growing stronger. She didn't know why, but she couldn't help it. Billy was dangerous and mysterious and Rachel wanted to know more with every inch of her. "Listen, I'm not supposed to know any of this so please don't tell anyone." Nicole pleaded. 

"I won't say anything." Rachel looked back at Nicole. "You think I would actually talk to Billy about that?" 

"No, I know you wouldn't, I'm just saying, that's all." Nicole laughed. Nicole and Rachel's heads turned to the building when they heard Billy yelling. His voice was deep and terrifying. He was in Baggy's face screaming and cursing. Yelling about Baggy not ever doing his job and getting worse then Heco. Billy turned away from Baggy for a moment. He put his hands on his hips and put his head back. He was breathing heavy. Rachel could see his eyes, they looked how they did the night Baggy attacked her. He turned around quick and punched Baggy dead in his face. Baggy went flying back and fell down the stairs. Joe, who was not in their view before ran down the stairs after Baggy. "Billy, your gonna fuckin' kill him one of these days." Joe yelled up at his brother as he tried to help Baggy to his feet. Billy walked down the stairs and grabbed Baggy by the shirt once he reached him.

"Keep the shit up and I _will_ fuckin' kill you." He let go of his shirt and Baggy fell to the floor. "You better be there tonight or your sister won't be able to identify your remains." Billy walked away and headed towards the car. Nicole sat back quickly as Billy opened the door. He stopped before he got in and turned back to where Baggy and Joe were. "Get in the fuckin' car Joe." He demanded. His voice was raspy and struggling to work. Joe ran to the car and jumped in the front seat. Billy looked back at Baggy before he entered the car. He was still breathing heavy while he rubbed his shaved head several times. He took out a cigarette and lit it. His eyes landed on his rear view mirror where he could see Rachel looking out the window at Baggy. Her face was frozen with fear. He started the car and sped off as fast as he could. His tires turned and left a cloud of smoke as they sped out the gates opening, onto the street. No one spoke. Mostly because everyone was afraid to. Joe's face was clear that he also was afraid of his brother. He was biting his nails while he smoked a cigarette. His left leg was shaking and he kept looking at Billy from the corner of his eye. 

"You don't have to work tonight with Baggy. Let him do it on his own." Billy finally broke the silence. Joe looked over at his brother. 

"Thanks." Joe didn't know what to say. He looked back at Nicole and Rachel and smiled. "So, now that I don't have work, why don't you come to the bar tonight?" Joe asked Nicole. Nicole looked over at Rachel. 

"It's ok. Just because you're staying at my house doesn't mean you can't go out. Have fun." Rachel knew she couldn't go to the bar anymore, but she didn't want to ruin Nicole's fun. Rachel looked at the rear view mirror to see Billy's eyes looking back at her. 

"You can come too." He said to her, his eyes going back and forth from her and the road. Her eyes widened a bit. "Baggy won't be there tonight and probably won't for a few days. And everyone else knows better than to fuck with you now." Rachel wondered what he meant by that. She nodded at him in the mirror and looked back at Nicole. Nicole gave her a faint smile and looked back at Joe.

"Ok, we'll come out." Nicole leaned forward and kissed Joe. They drove the rest of the way in silence. Billy pulled into Rachel's driveway. Joe got out and let Nicole out. Rachel was about to leave when Billy grabbed her arm. She gasped and turned around quickly. Billy's eyes were stern.

"Make sure you come out." It sounded like a demand. Her heart was pounding again from her nerves. Rachel nodded and felt his grip loosen. After staring at her for a few seconds he let go of her arm. She climbed out of the car and said goodbye to Joe. Nicole said her goodbyes and followed Rachel into the house. All she wanted to do was to take a shower and finish her schoolwork. Nicole looked tired and asked if she could go take a nap in Rachel's room. Rachel nodded and Nicole headed up the stairs. She figured she would call her father to let him know she was alive and see how he was doing. She grabbed the phone off the kitchen wall and dialed. Her father answered on the second ring.

"God damn it Rachel" Her father yelled.

"Dad, I'm sorry. I-" 

"No! I don't want to hear it. Your ok, that's all that matters. You are ok right?"

"I'm fine. We slept at a friend's house, I was so tired from lack of sleep the whole week, and it just crept up on me I guess." She hated lying to her father.

"I'm happy you're ok. I was worried sick. If you go out again tonight just call me before you go. I won't be able to call you until tomorrow afternoon."

"How's work?"

"I actually really like this, traveling and feeling important." He laughed. "But don't worry; I'll be home before you know it. Listen, I have to go, I'm being summoned. I love you and I'll talk to you tonight." Rachel told her father she loved him and then hung up the phone. She took a shower and finished her remaining homework. She washed her uniforms and made dinner for her and Nicole. After she woke Nicole up for her six hour "nap", they ate and then got ready to go out.


	5. Chapter 5

**R**achel stood outside of the Four Roses, breathing the cold air into her lungs. She left her coat inside and was now regretting it. She hugged herself and leaned against the wall. She couldn't go back in yet, not after the scene she just caused. She was shocked that Billy hadn't come out and strangled her. Why doesn't she think before she acts when she's around him? Billy's smirk was her reason for what she did. He didn't even care. He embarrassed her and was enjoying it. The sound of the door opening made her jump. She looked over at Nicole, who was holding her coat.

"Here." Nicole handed her the jacket. Rachel grabbed it quickly and put it on. Tonight was the coldest night since she had been there. "So are you going to tell me what the hell that was all about?" Nicole grabbed her cigarettes from her jacket pocket and lit one. 

"I don't want to talk about it." 

"You better talk about it." Nicole demanded. 

"What, what do you want me to say Nicole?" Rachel yelled. "What, that I'm jealous? Yeah ok, I am! I don't know why but I can't stop thinking about him." Rachel walked to the cars in the parking lot. She stood next to Billy's, looking at the red tribal decals across the driver's side.

"So basically you really like him?" Nicole looked down to the floor and started kicking a rock. Rachel looked over at her.

"I know I'm crazy, but I can't help it." The doors to the Four Roses burst open and Bodie came out walking over to the girls.

"Get in." He pointed to Billy's car looking at Rachel.

"What?" She said taking a step back.

"C'mon, I'm takin' you home."

"No your not." Rachel walked completely away from the car.

"Listen Ray, I don't want to argue. I'm just doin' what I was told."

"You were _told_ to take me home?" Rachel looked back at the Four Roses. Her heart sank. Billy was a total bastard. She looked back at Bodie, her eyes showing her hurt.

"I don't need you to take me home. I'll find my own way." Rachel walked away from Nicole and Bodie and headed towards the street.

"Rachel, don't be crazy! You can't walk around by yourself in this neighborhood." Nicole looked at Bodie and hit his arm.

"Ow, what the hell was that for?" Bodie said rubbing his arm.

"Your just gonna let you leave? You know how dangerous it is for her!" Nicole yelled.

"Oh stop, she'll be back. She's not stupid." Bodie said walking back to the bar.

"She may not be stupid but she's fucking stubborn as shit." Nicole said as she ran past Bodie into the bar. 

Rachel's stomach was hurting as she walked up the dark block. She was replaying the night in her head. 

Billy had picked them up at her house at around nine. They drove in silence, which was usual when you were in the car with him. Rachel tried to make eye contact with him through the mirror several times, but failed. They pulled up to the bar and Joe noticed the car they parked next to immediately.

"What the fuck are they doin' here?" Joe had said when he stepped out of the car. Nicole looked over recognizing Lisa's car.

"Maybe Mike's here." She said.

"Nah, he won't come here after what happened last night." Joe said looking over at Rachel. Rachel looked uncomfortable. They walked into the bar to see Lisa sitting with Tommy. Heco and Spink were at the bar hitting on some random ladies. Jessica was playing pool with Bodie. Why did she have to be here? Rachel looked over at Billy who also noticed Jessica. He looked back at Rachel then quickly looked away as he headed to the table where Lisa and Tommy were seated. 

"Hey Billy." Tommy said sitting up straight. He looked nervous. Billy seriously had these boys in check.

"What's up? Move over." Billy said as he sat down. He looked over at Rachel and motioned to the seat next to him for her to sit. Rachel hesitated for a moment then sat down. Nicole sat next to Lisa and Joe grabbed a chair from the table next to him.

"Where's Charlie?" Joe asked Lisa. Lisa's head shot towards Joe, her eyes widened. 

"Who knows who cares?" Lisa said quickly. "We broke up last night." She looked back over at Tommy. 

"Well you didn't waste any time." Billy said nodding over to Tommy. Tommy smiled.

"She kicked my ass." Bodie said as he walked to the table. Jessica walked behind him laughing.

"Sorry, but lesson taught. Never under estimate a beautiful girl." Jessica said putting her hand on Bodie's shoulder.

"You're a bit full of yourself, no?" Billy said. Jessica looked over at him smiling.

"Some people give me a reason to be." She raised her eyebrows at him and Billy smirked at her. Rachel looked at him and then back at Jessica, who was now looking at Rachel. Bodie pulled a chair up for himself and Nicole got up to let Jessica in, and then sat back down. She didn't want her sitting next to Joe.

"So, who's going to have a shot with me?" Jessica asked looking at Billy.

"What's your poison?" Billy asked lighting his cigarette with the candle in the middle of the table.

"Anything _you_ got I'm sure _I_ want." Jessica was smiling at Billy. Rachel could feel her face burning. It must have turned red because Bodie narrowed his eyes at her and nodded his head, questioning her. She gave him a faint smile and shook her head lightly.

"Sammy." Billy yelled. Sammy looked over at Billy. "Bring me a bottle of Jack and-" Billy looked around the table "eight shot glasses." Sammy turned around and grabbed an unopened bottle of Jack Daniels and eight glasses before quickly walking over to the table. He placed them in front Billy then walked back behind the bar. Billy pushed the glasses to the middle of the table and told them to take one. He opened the bottle of Jack and poured the brown liquid in each glass. "No thank you." Rachel said as he was about to pour hers. He stopped and looked up at her. 

"Rachel," Billy sighed in annoyance "when I pour you a glass you drink it." He continued pouring her glass. Rachel looked up at Jessica who was smirking at her. Billy raised his glass and everyone followed. Billy downed his first, then Bodie. Joe, Nicole and Jessica drank theirs. Rachel looked down at her glass and then at Billy. Billy's eyes were on her. She was disrespecting him, and she knew it. She reached down and picked up her glass and drank it quickly. She put her glass down hard and looked back at Billy. "Happy?" She asked.

"Don't get smart Rachel." Billy warned her. The next two hours were painful for her. Jessica took over Billy's attention. She was his shot buddy while Rachel sat on the sidelines. She had feelings for a man who completely ignored her. A man who would never be more to her then what he was right at that moment. Rachel went to the bar and decided to drown her sorrows. Bodie offered to keep her company. He ordered them a few rounds of shots. Billy walked over to them after they finished their third round. Rachel was laughing at something Bodie said. 

"So, I guess I'm not good enough to have shots with huh?" Billy leaned right next to her ear, his breath caressing her neck. Rachel took a deep breath before she turned to face him. 

"The company's nice over here." She said flatly. Billy flared his nostrils. His eyes looked dark. That comment was now added to her regret list. He leaned down to her face.

"Well, I better get back to _my_ company." His said in a malicious tone. He walked over to Jessica and sat down. She got up and sat on his lap. Rachel was feeling drunk by this point. She looked over at Bodie and asked him to have another shot with her. He laughed. "You got it." He waved at Sammy who poured them another. Rachel downed it and then looked back over at Billy, who was now being kissed by Jessica. Rachel's mind spun, her drunken jealously kicked in and before she knew what she was doing she walked over to them and picked up the beer that was on the table and poured it over Jessica's head. 

"Oh my God!" Jessica jumped up then looked at Rachel. "You stupid bitch!" Jessica yelled. Bodie walked over to Rachel and grabbed her arm just before she was about to hit Jessica. 

"Calm down!" Bodie said doing a terrible job at trying to hold in his laugh. Billy rushed past Jessica and grabbed Rachel by her arm, pulling her face close to his.

"What the fuck was that for?" Billy said. She couldn't tell if he was mad or not. His eyes almost looked like they were laughing. But his mouth was stern.

"You make out with me just last night and then you actually think I'm gonna sit here and watch you with _her_?" Rachel yelled pointing at Jessica.

"Keep your fuckin' voice down." Billy looked around the room, and then pulled her closer to the door. He looked back at her. This time his mouth _was_ smiling. "You jealous?" Rachel's heart sunk. He had made a fool out of her. This was all a game to him. She almost wanted to cry, and then decided not to. Instead she lifted her hand and smacked Billy across his cheek. It was hard and loud. She turned and stormed out of the bar. 

She thought for sure Billy would have hurt her for not only putting her hands on him, but for doing it right at his place, in front of his men. Now she was still walking on the dark street that seemed to never end. She was now realizing that leaving was a stupid idea. But her pride was getting in the way of her common sense. A car sped up behind her and stopped short. Rachel started walking faster, not knowing what was going to happen. Billy jumped out and started to jog to her. She looked back to see his face filled with fury.

"Stop fuckin' running!" He yelled as he grabbed her arm.

"Get off of me you piece of shit!" Rachel pushed him off of her. She turned and started to run but Billy ran in front of her. 

"Get in the car." He stopped her and pointed to his car.

"Billy just leave me alone ok?" Her face was serious.

"Trust me; you don't want me to leave you alone out _here_."

"My mother always told me not to trust a man who says _trust_ me."

"Your mother's a smart woman."

"_Was_." Rachel whispered lowering her eyes.

"What?" 

"_Was_ a smart woman." She said louder. "My mother _was_ a smart woman." Rachel's eye began to water. She turned away from Billy. The last thing she wanted was for him to see her crying.

"Rachel, would you get in the car." He practically begged her. Rachel gave up. She just wanted to go home. She walked to his car and got into the front seat. Billy looked around before he joined her. He made a U-turn and headed back to the bar. They pulled into the parking lot and Billy turned the engine off. He stared out the front window.

"So, do you go around hitting every guy you know, or just me?" Billy looked at her.

"Nope, only the assholes."

"You don't know me enough to say I'm an asshole." Billy looked back out the front window. He lit a cigarette and let it hang out the corner of his mouth.

"I know all about you." Rachel gave him a smirk.

"Ah, you _think_ you know about me." Still not looking at her.

"Really?" Rachel turned her body to face Billy. "I know you're a thug and a thief and a drug dealer. I know you're this feared gang lord." She stopped for a second. She took a deep breath. "I know you're a murderer." Billy's head shot to face Rachel. His eyes were wide and his cigarette looked like it was about to fall out of his mouth. Rachel held her breath, not sure of what his reaction was going to be. His wide eyed expression changed to a questioning glare. He looked away from her again, looking at his hands.

"Do I scare you?" Billy asked. 

"Yes." She said without hesitation. She wasn't going to lie. He scared the shit out of her. Even as they kissed each other the night before she was scared. Rachel cared about him too. She didn't know why, and didn't want to. She needed him to know how she felt. Even if he didn't feel the same, she needed him to know. She didn't want to be like her parents and always live with "what if". She cleared her throat. 

"I'm scared out of my mind when I'm near you, but yet I feel safe from the rest of the world. And even with everything I know I can't stop thinking about you." He opened his window then took his cigarette out of his mouth, flicking it out. He looked over at Rachel, and grabbed the back of her neck, pulling her to his face. He put his forehead to hers and closed his eyes. He pulled his mouth to her and kissed her. Not the hungry kiss they shared the night before. This was different, almost sincere, and real. He pulled away. "I'll be right back." He got out of the car and went into the bar. He came back out just a few minutes later. "I'm gonna take you home." They drove to Rachel's again in silence. Billy pulled into her driveway and turned off the engine. He looked over at her. She couldn't take how she felt anymore. She wanted him. She bit her lower lip and asked the question she knew he couldn't refuse.

"Do you want to come in?" She almost whispered the words. Billy smirked. He looked up at her house then back at her. He nodded his head then got out of the car. Billy followed her into her house and up the stairs into her bedroom. Rachel couldn't believe he was in her room. She smiled to herself. The butterflies in her stomach were flying around viciously. After closing the door she turned around to see Billy taking his coat off and placing it on her desk chair. He walked closer to her then stopped. He put his head down, sighing.

"You have to stop." He said.

"Stop what?"

"Looking at me with those eyes." Billy pointed to her face. Rachel shot him her best smile and fluttered her eyelashes at him trying to be cute. At that moment Billy looked like someone she hadn't seen before. His eyes were bright and he had a smile from ear to ear showing his gorgeous teeth. Not the smile she had seen the first night she met him. He actually looked happy. Rachel couldn't help but be mesmerized. Billy walked over to her quickly; his smile fading, and grabbed her face. Kissing her the same way he did in the stairwell. She kissed him back, her hands pulling at his shirt. He backed away from her and pulled his shirt over his head throwing it to the floor. He removed the rest of his clothes, keeping his eyes on her the whole time. Was this really going to happen? Her body was throbbing for him. She couldn't wait anymore. She pulled her shirt over her head and undressed. His eyes ravished her. Then she felt something through her body, almost as if she could actually feel the blood coursing through her veins. Billy grabbed her in his arms and brought her down onto the bed. He placed himself on top of her; at first he was gentle, kissing her softly as he moved. Then his thrusts became faster and faster. His kisses became demanding and hard. The pleasure she was feeling was growing and uncontrollable. She wanted this feeling to last forever. She couldn't control the moans that escaped her throat. Billy welcomed them pulling her to him every time he heard it. His own noises could no longer be contained. Their night ended in the early morning and they slept holding each other. This was the first time since her mother died that she slept the entire night without dreaming.


	6. Chapter 6

Joe jumped at the banging at the front door

**J**oe jumped from his seat at the kitchen table. The banging on the front door was rigorous. He held his breath and didn't move, trying to listen to every sound. Was it the cops? Was it some rival gang having enough balls to show up at Billy's place? He quietly ran to the closet to get the gun Billy hid there. Now he stood in the kitchen, gun in hand, waiting. His breath was heavy and his hands began to shake. He wasn't brave like Billy. Joe never had to be. Billy and the rest of the gang were brave enough. The banging began again making Joe jump. He ran to his room to check on Nicole. She was sleeping. She hadn't heard the door practically being knocked down. Joe ran back to the kitchen and stood to the side of the door.

"I know you're in there Natzi!" Joe sunk back on the wall closing his eyes. He placed the gun in the back of his pajama pants and pulled his shirt over it. He opened the door quickly.

"Are you trying to give me a fucking heart attack?" Joe yelled. Bones Darley pushed passed him into the apartment. He looked around, his eyes narrowed and jaw clenched.

"Where the _fuck_ is he?" He said looking at Joe. Joe's eyes darted around. He couldn't tell him where he really was. At the house of the only girl he ever cared about. Bones would use that to his advantage.

"Don't know." He couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Listen here boy, you better find your brother and tell him I'm looking for him. We have some business to attend to and I'm tired of waitin'." He walked over to Joe and grabbed him by his shirt, slamming him against the wall. "If you think for one second your gonna fuck me around like your brother tries to, I'll fuckin' kill ya." Joe's eyes grew wide. He feared Bones more than he did Billy. Bones had no conscience. No heart and a black hole for a soul. Joe's eyes looked past Bones to Nicole who was standing at the hallway with fear in her eyes. Bones noticed Joe's stare and turned around. A grin grew on his face as he looked at the beautiful blonde standing before him.

"Well hello there." Bones said, eyeing the girl. Nicole stood with out talking. Not sure of whom this man was.

"Nicole, go back to the room." Joe demanded. Bones looked back at Joe.

"She can't be yours. There's no way I'm gonna believe that gorgeous girl is yours. Billy's maybe. Yours definitely not."

"I'm Joe's girlfriend." Nicole said with annoyance in her voice. Joe shut his eyes and shook his head. Bones turned to look back at Nicole. He let go of Joe's shirt and wiped down the creases he made.

"Well son, I don't want to embarrass you in front of your _girlfriend_." He said laughing. He walked over to Nicole who took a step back. He put his hand out. "I'm Bones. Bones Darley." Nicole's eyes narrowed and she looked over at Joe with a questioning stare. Bone's noticed her look. "Yes, I'm your boyfriends and his useless brother's father. Aren't I a lucky man?" Nicole looked down at the mans chubby hand. She swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat and placed her hand in his. His grip was strong and sweaty. He pulled her closer to him. Joe took a step forward then stopped. Nicole gasped and her eyes grew wide. His breath was on her face. His grip became tighter making Nicole moan from the agony she was feeling.

"Don't know what you know about me, but I don't play fuckin' games. I'm leavin' you in charge of tellin' my boy Billy that I'm lookin' for him. He better be by the shop by tonight or else." He looked her up and down. "Or else maybe I'll make you pay for his dilatoriness." Joe walked over to Nicole grabbing her arm. Bones loosened his grip on her and looked over at Joe.

"Go back in the room, now!" He yelled at Nicole. Bones smiled. He turned his heal and walked to the door. Opening it hard and letting it slam against the wall. He looked back at Joe.

"I'll be waiting." Bones disappeared into the hall. Joe ran to the door and slammed it shut, locking every lock. He put his forehead against the door inhaling deep a few times. He remembered Nicole and ran to his room.

Nicole went straight for her cell phone after running back into Joe's room. She dialed Rachel's house. Tears formed in her eyes. Never had she been so scared. She rubbed her right wrist where a bruise was forming. The man was an animal. She couldn't help but cry. It was uncontrollable at first. Then she held her breath and tried to control it. Rachel wasn't answering. She hung up her phone then dialed the number again.

Billy woke up first, staring at Rachel lying next to him. He moved some hair that fell on her face which made her move. She opened her eyes, noticing Billy. She smiled and moved closer to him. Rachel's face was in his chest, breathing in his scent. Billy put his hand on her chin, pulling her lips to his. He kissed her lips softly, moving his kisses down her jaw line to her neck. She moaned in acceptance. He pulled himself on top of her. Those same chills shot through her body again. He put his lips to hers again. Rachel kissed him back pulling him close to her. Rachel felt Billy put himself inside of her again. She gasped and bit her bottom lip. He smiled at her. The phone rang next to them. Rachel looked over and tried to pick it up but Billy grabbed her hand putting it over her head. Billy began to kiss her wildly. The phone had stopped ringing, but continued again. Rachel pulled her face away from Billy making him sigh deeply.

"It could be my father." She said looking back at him. Billy was clearly annoyed, sighing again as he moved off of her. Rachel reached over and picked up the phone.

"Hello."

"Rachel, where's Billy?"

"Nicole?"

"Rachel! Where is he?" Nicole yelled.

"He's right here, what the hell happened? Are you crying?" Billy shot up and grabbed the phone from Rachel's hand.

"Nicole, where's my brother? Is he ok?"

"He's fine. Bones was just here." Billy's eyes widened. He jumped out of bed and started looking for his clothes. "I'll be right there." He hung up the phone and started getting dressed. Rachel watched as he frantically ran around the room, looking for his remaining clothes.

"My fuckin' shirt. Where the fuck is my fuckin' shirt?" Billy yelled at Rachel, making her jump. Her eyes looked around the room. She pointed by the door. "It's right there." She said. Billy ran over to his shirt pulling it over his head. Rachel climbed out of bed. She went through her draws putting new panties and a new bra on. She walked to her closet and pulled on a pair of black sweatpants and a white fitted t-shirt. She pulled her hair back in a pony tail and went into the bathroom to brush her teeth.

"I gotta go, if you comin lets go _now_!" Billy yelled as he ran down the stairs. Rachel wiped her face and followed him. She pulled her dark blue denim jacket on and locked the door. Billy was already in his car about to pull away. Rachel got in the car and as soon as she shut the door Billy sped off. He was driving fast and swerving in and out of lanes. Rachel put her seat belt on and closed her eyed. She was terrified. Billy didn't notice, he was thinking about his brother and why Bones was there.

Billy burst through the door making Nicole and Joe jump. Joe got up and walked to his brother. Rachel walked past them right to Nicole. "What happened?" She whispered.

"What the fuck was he doin' here Joe?" Billy shut the door then took his jacket off. He sat at the kitchen table with his elbows on his knees.

"He was pissed. Sayin' you two have business and he's tired of waitin'. What the fuck is goin' on Billy?" Joe said sitting across from him. Joe lit two cigarettes handing one over to Billy. Billy took it inhaling deeply.

"Fuckin' Heco. He never showed. That motherfucker never showed." Billy shook his head. His eyes looked crazy. His eyes searched the room for Rachel. She was holding Nicole as she sobbed on her shoulder. "What happened to her?" Billy nodded over to Nicole.

"Fuckin' Bones. He scared the shit out of her. He grabbed her wrist. He left a bruise and everything." Billy got up and walked over to Nicole. He knelt down and grabbed her hand. Her wrist bruised up quick, leaving the outline of Bone's chubby fingers. He looked up at Rachel.

"Who is this guy?" Rachel asked. Nicole pulled away from Nicole and Billy.

"He's their fucking father." Nicole yelled. She got up off the couch and ran into Joe's room.

"Your father did this to her?" Rachel stood up looking at Joe.

"He donated his sperm to our mother. He's no father." Joe said walking past them to his room. Rachel looked at Billy.

"Why would your father hurt his son's girlfriend?"

"Because he's a piece of shit. I have to go take care of some stuff. Do you wanna come?" Billy walked over to Rachel putting his arm around her waist. He kissed her cheek. He never was like this with a girl before. He never asked a girl to go anywhere with him. She looked over to the hall.

"What about Nicole?"

"She's got Joe. She'll be fine. C'mon." He put his hand in hers and pulled her out the front door.

They drove to an apartment building that was about ten minutes from where Billy lived. They got out of the car and walked into the building and up three flights of stairs. Billy stopped in front of a door and started pounding viciously.

"Heco! Open the fuckin' door." He continued pounding the door. Rachel stepped back. Seeing Billy like this was frightening. Even still, she found him unbelievably attractive.

"Heco I swear to fuckin' God you don't open this fuckin' door I'll break it down!" Billy hit it one more time then kicked the door.

"Hold up dude. I'm here." Rachel could hear Heco say from behind the door. Billy took his coat off and handed it to Rachel. He rolled up his sleeves as they heard Heco unlocking the locks. Heco opened it and smiled at them. He was shirtless and Rachel could see the many more tattoos he owned.

"What you getting all crazy for?" Billy brushed past him into the apartment. He walked straight to the kitchen, grabbed a chair and put it in front of the refrigerator. He climbed the chair and opened the cabinet over the frig. He pulled out a black bag and then jumped off the chair. He dumped the contents onto the table. He sorted through everything and started to laugh. Heco was standing in the living room, his arms crossed over his chest his head facing the floor. Billy put his palms flat on the table and bent his head down. "Where's the rest of the money Heco?" Billy said, his head still bowed down.

"Ah, Billy…I ah…" Heco stuttered. "I wasn't supposed to see you until tonight." He wouldn't look at Billy. Billy raised his head. He looked at Heco with squinted eyes. His nostrils were flaring and his jaw was clenched. His hands had formed into fists. Billy rose up quickly. He put his hand behind his back and pulled a gun at Heco. Heco flinched and backed up. Rachel gasped, putting her hand over her mouth. Billy walked quickly over to Heco, placing the gun on his forehead. Rachel's eyes began to water as she backed up towards the door.

"I should fuckin' kill you right now! I should blow your fuckin' head off right now!" Billy screamed. "You rob from me and I let it go. I cover up for you. Now Bones comes and puts his hands on my brother's girl in _my_ house." Billy pushed the gun onto Heco's forehead making his face twist from pain. Billy put his face close to Heco's. "My boy, my brother?" Billy's anger showed in his face. "Isn't that what you're supposed to be?"

"Billy, I'm sorry bro. What can I do? What can I do Billy please?" Heco grabbed onto Billy's shirt. He was shaking and crying. He knew that Billy would actually kill him.

"You can get up off your druggy ass and go make me the rest of my money. I don't care if you sell your fuckin' girl for it. Get me the fucking money before I go see Bones." Billy screamed. His voice was harsh and stressed.

"Ok Billy, ok. I promise. I'll have it by tonight." Heco's voice was shaky. Billy pulled the gun from his forehead and placed it back in the back of his jeans. He put his hands on his hips, he was breathing heavy.

"I'm going there at nine. Make sure you have that money before then." Billy walked past Rachel out the door. Rachel looked at Heco who slumped to the floor. She walked quickly out the door after Billy. Rachel couldn't believe what she had just seen. She was shaking and her stomach began to hurt. She followed him down the steps. He hadn't looked back once to make sure she was there. When they reached outside she ran up to him grabbing his arm. He pulled his arm away and stopped short. He looked over at Rachel with hate in his eyes. He was breathing heavy. Rachel backed away, her eyes searching his face.

"What?" He yelled. Rachel's eyes watered again. She walked away from him to his car. She stood at the passenger's side with her back against the car. She closed her eyes and put her head down. Was this who he was? Why would she ever want to be with someone like him? He was the bad guy. The guy girls like her stayed clear away from. Her father would die if he knew she had sex with him. That she was starting to really care for him. She felt his hand on her cheek. She didn't want to open her eyes. She didn't want him to see the tears that she was praying would dry up. He put his hands behind her neck. His lips touched hers softly. "I'm sorry." He whispered. She opened her eyes and looked at his face. He looked different. The anger was gone. He leaned down kissing her again. She pulled her face away and put her hands on his chest pushing him. He sighed and took a step back.

"Is this how it is?" She asked.

"How what is?" He asked annoyed as he lit a cigarette.

"Being with you, is this how it is?"

"You know all about me, _right_? Why do you look so shocked?"

"This just isn't who I am. I don't do the things that you do."

"Then why'd you fuck me last night?" Billy smirked.

"You bastard!" Rachel tried to open the car door but it was locked. Billy reached down and unlocked it. He walked around the car and got in.

"Do you want me to bring you home?" Billy asked, looking out the front window.

"No." Rachel said.

"Why do you want to stay with me?"

"I don't know!" Rachel yelled, surprising them both. Billy looked over at her. She put her head in her hand and rubbed her forehead. She was so beautiful. Nothing of what he was used to. Girls like her never wanted him. And if they did it was for who he was. The excitement of being with Billy Darley, the feared gang lord. But she seemed genuine. He thought about her all the time. He knew he had feelings for her, but he would never tell anyone, not even her. He wanted her to be his. The thought of her with anyone else made his stomach hurt and his anger rise. He started the car and drove back to his apartment. They drove in silence.

"Did you?" Nicole asked Rachel as they sat at her kitchen table. They had hung out with Billy and Joe for a couple of hours when Billy got a phone call from Baggy. It must have been important because Billy drove them home first. Nicole had gone home to get some clothes and Rachel called her father, apologizing for not calling him yet again. Now they were sitting in her kitchen talking about Billy spending the night.

"Did I what?' Rachel said, trying hard to conceal her smile.

"Oh my God, you so did you whore!" Nicole said, laughing.

"You're laughing? Thought you were against me and him?"

"I can't tell you what to do. I'm your friend, not your parent. Plus I can see how happy you are." Nicole pointed to her face. Rachel's cheeks turned red.

"It was…amazing. I can't even explain how I felt and the things he was saying." Rachel trailed off in her mind. Replaying the night they shared.

"What was he saying Ray?" Rachel looked up at Nicole, her cheeks turning a darker shade of red.

"Nothing." Rachel stood up and walked to the frig to get a water when the doorbell rang. Rachel looked at Nicole. "Who the hell is that? It's so late."

"Maybe my mom?" Nicole said. Rachel walked to the front door. She opened it to see Joe standing there and a cab pulling away. His head was down but you could clearly see the blood on his face.

"Joe?" Rachel said putting her hand on his chin and pulling his face up. His eyes were puffy from crying and his lip was all bruised and bloody. Both of his eyes were black and there was a cut over his cheek. "Oh my God Joe, who did this to you?"

"I'm sorry Rachel. I just had nowhere else to go." Rachel grabbed his hand and pulled him in the house. "Joe who did this to you?"

"It doesn't matter." He said following Rachel to the kitchen. Nicole jumped out of her seat when she saw Joe.

"Joe what happened?" Nicole yelled grabbing Joe's face. He put his head down trying to avoid her stare. "Joe damn it, who did this?"

"Billy."

"What?" Rachel said.

"Why would he do this?" Nicole yelled. Rachel went into the bathroom to get the first aid kit. Nicole opened it and cleaned up Joe's face. He started to cry. Not from the pain of the cuts, but the pain of his brothers unexplainable abuse.

"Joe, why would Billy do this to you? It doesn't make any sense." Rachel said, sitting across from him.

"I fucked up ok? Listen, he's really stressed out. Everybody's fuckin him over and he's the one who pays the price when we don't do our share." Joe yelled.

"That doesn't give him the right to do this." Rachel said waving her hand over his face. She stood up and got Joe a beer from the frig. "Where is he?"

"Four Roses." Joe said sipping his beer. Rachel got up and grabbed her keys and jacket.

"Jesus Christ Rachel, don't fuckin go there." He looked over at Nicole. "Please stop her, I'm serious Nicole." Nicole and Joe got out of their seats and went after Rachel.

"Rachel." He said grabbing her arm. "You do not want to go there. He's all fucked up right now. He will be pissed if you see him like that."

"Why would he be pissed?"

"Because I know how he feels about you. And if you see him all drunk and high he'll be really pissed."

"How he feels about her?" Nicole said from behind Joe. "He has _feelings_ for Rachel? Billy doesn't look like the type that has feelings for anybody."

"I'm not getting into this." He said to Nicole. "Just, don't go." Joe pleaded. Rachel opened the front door and walked to her father's truck. She heard Joe slam the door behind her. She wasn't sure what she was doing but she knew she needed to let Billy know his brother was hurt and at her house. She didn't have his cell number and knew Joe wouldn't give it to her, so she felt this was her only option.

Rachel pulled into the Four Roses parking lot. She backed into a spot and turned off the ignition starring at the door. She was now wondering if it was such a good idea just showing up. She knew what she felt for him and now knew he felt something for her. But she didn't know how he would react to her putting her nose in his family's business. He had put a gun to one of his closest friends head without hesitation. What would he do to her? Joe did say he was drunk and high. And she was sure he was in a bad mood to begin with if he did that to his brother's face. What was she going to say to him when she went in the bar? Hey Billy, you're an asshole for beating up your little brother, who by the way is at my house. Rachel closed her eyes and put her head down. He was making her crazy. Everything about him made her crazy. What was she doing to herself? The Four Roses door slammed open. Rachel looked up to see Jessica, laughing and clearly drunk. Someone wrapped their arms around her waist and spun her around. She pushed him against the wall and was kissing him. It was Billy. Rachel stopped breathing. Her heart sunk. She felt like throwing up watching them paw at each other like animals. Billy was now pushing her against the wall putting his hand up her skirt. He was kissing her neck and chest and she was enjoying every second of it. Rachel hadn't realized the tears until they fell down her cheeks. She looked away wiping the tears from her eyes and face. Rachel heard the door to the Four Roses slam open again. She just assumed it was them going back in until Bodie was standing at her window. His face was clear that he knew what she had seen.

"Ray, what're you doing here?" He said softly.

"I don't know," She said through her tears. She looked up to see Billy looking over at them. His eyes were squinted, as if he was trying to see who Bodie was talking to. When he realized it was Rachel his eyes widened. He just stared at her, unsure of what to do next "Being played apparently." She said looking over to Bodie again. Bodie looked over at Billy.

"Don't leave, I'll be right back." Bodie jogged over to Billy. Bodie told Jessica to go back in the bar. Rachel wanted to leave. She didn't want Billy near her. Billy was yelling at Bodie and Bodie told him to keep his voice down. Billy pushed past Bodie and was headed to Rachel's truck. She felt like she was having a panic attack the closer he got. He stood at her window, staring at her and breathing hard. She couldn't face him. She was mortified. She honestly thought he cared for her. She actually believed Joe when he said he had feelings for her. Why would she let herself get caught up in this?

"Why the fuck are you here?" His words were slurred. Rachel didn't know what to say. She was frightened and hurt.

"I…um," She barely got the words out before she started to cry again. He reached in the window and wiped a tear that fell down her cheek. She closed her eyes tight.

"Why're you crying?" Rachel didn't want him to know but she blurted out the words.

"Because I saw everything," Rachel looked over at him. His eyes were glassy and dark, he looked high and he sounded drunk. His eyes were narrow and his mouth hung open. "And I'm so stupid for getting myself involved with someone like you. I should have known better. Thank you for making me look like a fool."

"What do you want me to say?" He yelled.

"Nothing. I just want to go home." Rachel turned the engine on. She looked over to Billy.

"Real nice what you did to your brothers face. He's staying at my house with Nicole. I'll drive him back tomorrow." She put the car into drive. "Go have fun with your whore." Billy reached in touching Rachel's face again. She pushed him away so hard he fell back on the car next to hers. "Don't touch me! You're not allowed to touch me ever again! I hope she was worth it." Rachel yelled and then sped out of the parking lot. Billy watched as she sped down the block. He fucked up and he knew it. Billy walked over to his car and got in. He put the key in the ignition and started the car. He smacked himself in the face a few times to wake himself up. He pulled out of the parking lot and headed home. He needed to get some sleep and figure out what to do about Rachel. He wasn't going to let her get away from him that easily.


	7. Chapter 7

"Nicole, seriously we have to go." Adam yelled up the stairs to his sister. He was going to meet Joe for his weekly fix and Nicole begged him to take her along. She hadn't seen Joe all week, due to her school work. Joe was trying to get back on Billy's good side, so he had been working extra hard delivering packages for him all week, making their time together put on hold.

"I'm gonna leave you guys here and go by myself." Adam looked over at Rachel. She laughed at his impatience.

"She hasn't seen Joe all week Adam. She wants to make sure she looks good." Adam sighed threw his nose and put his head against the wall.

"Sorry about your mom."

"Thank you." She lowered her eyes to the floor. She didn't want to think about her mother right now. She just wanted to have a nice night with her friends.

"Ok, I'm ready! Let's go." Nicole ran past them out the front door. Adam and Rachel followed. They drove to an abandoned playground about ten minutes from The Four Roses. They pulled into the parking lot and waited. Headlights came into view and a car pulled up next to them. Joe got out of the passengers seat, while Mike got out of the drivers seat. Rachel's eyes widened. She leaned forward to Nicole.

"Did you know he was coming?" Nicole looked back at Rachel smiling.

"Joe didn't even know _I_ was coming." She got out of the car and ran to Joe. When he realized Nicole was there he grabbed her and spun her around kissing her. Rachel slowly got out of the car, her eyes trying to avoid Mikes. Did he know why Billy had really accused him of stealing his drugs?

"Yo Mike!"

"What's up Adam? Long time no see." Mike looked over to Rachel. She was leaning against Adam's car with her arms crossed over her chest looking down at the floor. He walked over to her.

"I was hoping to see you again." He was standing in front of her now. She looked up and smiled.

"Me too." Mike was so good looking, with the whole punk rocker look going on. He carried the look well. His dirty blond hair was a messy mop on top of his head. His eyes were bright under the street lamps. He really had an amazing smile.

"So," He leaned against his car across from her. "Sorry about last week. Billy came by my place a few days later and told me they found who really took his drugs." Hearing Billy's name made her cringe. She felt a stab of guilt knowing it was because of her he was accused.

"Let's not talk about that."

"I just felt bad leaving and not saying anything to you."

"It's ok. I'm sure you'll make it up to me." She gave him her best flirty smile. He fell into it. His smile grew and his cheeks blushed.

"I definitely _will_ make it up to you."

"What're you two doing over here?" Joe stood in front of them smiling. Nicole had her arm wrapped around his waist.

"Just talking." Rachel laughed.

"Are you gonna spark that, or what?" Adam said, pointing at Joe's hand. He held the joint that Adam had been waiting for. Joe looked down and laughed, remembering he was holding it. He took out his Zippo and lit it. He put it in his mouth and inhaled deeply. Mike and Adam took hits and Adam handed it over to Rachel who shook her head no.

"Sorry, I don't do drugs. I'm just a wanna-be alcoholic." They all laughed.

"So, what are we gonna do tonight?" Joe asked.

"Let's just chill here. No one will bother us." Mike said, sneaking a glance over to Rachel. He smirked, making Rachel smile.

"Joe didn't leave his money for the night?" Bodie asked Billy as they drove from 'the office'.

"Nah, he told me he would call me when he's done. He had to go meet up with Adam for a sale." Billy said.

"Adam?" Bodie said looking over at Billy.

"Nicole's brother. He buys every week like clockwork."

"When did he say he would be around?"

Billy looked down at his cell phone to see the time. "He was supposed to call me already."

Bodie laughed loud. "You got soft with him this week. I know he pulled his own weight, but you let him deliver when he wants, just because he was doing his job. Problem is now he takes advantage." Billy didn't like being taken advantage of. Not even from his brother. He opened his cell phone and dialed Joe's number.

"Look at you two!" Joe said. He was lying on Mike's hood with his back on his windshield. Nicole was sitting on top of him. He was looking over at Mike and Rachel. Mike's back was against Adam's car with Rachel's back up against his chest. His arms were wrapped around her.

"What? You jealous?" Rachel asked winking at Joe. Joe had convinced her to take a hit of the joint and she was feeling relaxed and comfortable.

"Hey now! No winking at Joe, Rachel. He's mine." Nicole leaned down and kissed Joe.

"Ah shit." Joe reached in his pocket and pulled out his phone. "What's up?" He answered.

"Where are you?" Billy said on the other end.

"Willowbrook Park."

"You got my money?"

"Yup." Joe laughed.

"What're you high?"

"Of course. Don't worry, it's paid for."

"Be there in a couple."

"Aight." Joe hung up his phone and placed it back in his pocket. He grabbed Nicole and kissed her.

"Where's Adam?" Rachel asked, looking around.

"He's sleeping in his car." Mike nodded behind him. "Bomb could go off he won't wake up." They laughed. Rachel felt good being in Mike's arms. His grip was strong and comforting. "You ok?"

"Actually, I'm great." She smiled and tilted her head to the right. He saw this as opportunity and kissed her neck. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of his lips on her skin. She pulled away and turned around facing him. He had the sweetest face. A smirk played across his lips as he pulled her to him. He touched her face and Rachel lost her breath. He leaned down and kissed her. His kisses were soft and slow, making Rachel turn to putty in his arms. His hands reached the back of her neck and he pulled her closer to him. She was so caught up in their embrace she didn't hear the car pull into the parking lot. Its lights stopped on them as they kissed.

"What the fuck!" Joe yelled pushing Nicole off of him. He squinted, putting his hand over his eyes trying to stop the light from blinding him. "Oh shit." Joe said realizing whose car it was.

"Who is that?" Nicole asked getting off the car. Rachel and Mike had stopped kissing and were now blinded by the lights.

"My brother." Joe jumped off the car and headed towards the lights. Rachel's stomach tightened as she heard the words leave Joe's mouth. Nicole looked at her and mouthed the words, 'I'm sorry'.

Billy's breathing was heavy and his jaw was clenched so tight it was beginning to hurt. After he pulled into the parking lot, Rachel and Mike's kissing figures were caught in his lights. He stopped the car, not being able to take his eyes off of them. Joe was now headed to him, embarrassment written across his face. Billy took his foot of the break and pulled into a spot quickly, slamming on the breaks. Joe stopped in his tracks, waiting to see what his brother was going to do. After several seconds passed and Billy was still in the car, Joe walked over. Billy rolled his window down as he saw Joe walk over through his rearview mirror.

"Hey Billy." Joe said. Billy didn't say anything back; he just stared out the windshield smoking his cigarette. Joe bent over to look at Bodie. "Hey Bodie."

"What's up Joe?"

"Where's my money?" Billy finally spoke. Still not looking in Joe's direction.

"Hold up, I got it in Mike's car." Joe walked over to Mike's car and opened the back door. He reached under his seat and pulled out an old black JanSport.

"What is he doing here?" Nicole whispered to Joe.

"I didn't even realize what I was saying to him." He closed the door, and then walked up to Nicole. "I told him to meet me here."

"Hey, it's cool guys. Billy came and told me that someone else took the drugs he was missing." Mike said. Thinking their awkwardness was because of him.

"This isn't about you." Nicole said to Mike. She heard the car door slam and turned her head towards Billy and Bodie walking over to them. "Great Joe, now what?"

"It's ok Nicole. I told you I was over it." Rachel said.

Mike looked down at Rachel. "Over what?" He asked. But she didn't have time to answer. Billy was right in front of them.

"Hey Mike!" Billy's voice was deep. "How the hell are ya?" He put his hand out to Mike. He took Billy's hand.

"I'm good Billy. You?"

"Me, you ask?" Billy's smiled. "I'm doing fuckin' great!" He said looking at Rachel. Rachel was staring right back. She inched closer to Mike, grabbing his hand. Billy noticed this, looking at their hands together. He was beginning to see red, but kept his cool. He didn't want to hurt Mike over something he didn't know anything about.

"So, you gotta bring that shit to Bones right?" Joe asked.

"Are you tryin' to get rid of me Joe?" Billy asked as he took his coat off. He was getting hot and was feeling closed in.

"Nah Billy. C'mon. I want you to stay. I just know you don't wanna hear Bones." Joe said as he pulled at his ear. Something he did when he was nervous. Billy smiled. He knew his brother was trying to get rid of him for Rachel. He respected him for it.

"I don't have to bring him shit right now. I'm still waiting on a few more deliveries then I'll go deliver to Bones. Until then," He lit the cigarette he had placed in his mouth. "I'm all yours." Bodie laughed at Billy's subtlety.

"Ok, so let's spark ourselves a doob." Bodie said pulling out a zip-lock bag filled with weed. Joe looked over at Nicole and shrugged his shoulders. His efforts failed there was nothing he could do.

Rachel sat against Adam's car as the guys smoked and talked. Nicole was too busy holding onto Joe to notice her expression. She shifted her weight and sighed. Mike turned to her placing his hand on her arm.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she looked over to Billy, who was talking to Joe and Bodie. She looked back at Mike. "I'm ok." Mike smiled then put his attention back over to Billy to finish their conversation.

"Hey Billy, you talking to that dark haired girl ah," Mike looked around trying to remember the girls name.

"Jessica." Billy said.

"Yeah, that's her name." Rachel's back stiffened. Her eyes widened and she looked at Billy with anger.

"Well if you mean, did I fuck her yet, no." Billy laughed. Rachel made a huff noise and rolled her eyes.

"What was that for?" Billy asked reaching into his pocket for his cigarettes.

"No reason." Rachel was clearly getting annoyed.

"Well, I think she's hot." Bodie added. He smiled at himself for adding to the argument he knew was about to unravel.

"If you like that sort of thing." Rachel mumbled.

"What sort of thing?" Billy smirked.

"A slut. If you like sluts then yeah you'd like her."

"How do you know she's a slut?" Billy crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for Rachel to answer. She looked around to see everyone was looking at her.

"You can just tell." Nicole added. Joe squeezed her hand, letting her know not to get involved.

"Yeah, you _can_ just tell. She's gross. No matter how 'hot' you think she is," Rachel looked over at Bodie. "She's gross." She looked back at Billy. His smirk was pissing her off. She wanted to hit him with something.

"Am I sensing a hint of jealousy Rachel?" He was calling her out.

"Jealous of _her_? Ha!" Rachel laughed. "You've got to be kidding me! What reason would I have to be jealous of a girl like her? What the hell does she have that I could ever possibly want?" Rachel was hiding her anger the best she could.

"Me." Billy smiled. Mike's eyes shot over to Billy. His eyebrows rose.

"You?" Now Rachel was the one smiling. "No Billy, I don't want you." Rachel moved closer to Mike. Bodie stood up straight. He was preparing himself for the worst. Billy's expression changed. He looked at her threw hateful eyes.

"Really?" Billy looked coolly over at Mike. "That's not what she said last week." Joe coughed on his cigarette smoke and Nicole put her head down. Rachel's smile faded quickly, her eyes widening at the embarrassment she felt. Mike shifted, slightly pulling away from Rachel. The confusion on Rachel's face was easily read as she looked up at Mike. He turned his head away from her. He knew better then to mess with any girl that Billy was ever with. Her anger burnt through her stomach and up her chest. Her hands began to sweat. She looked back at Billy, their eyes meeting, burning into each other. How could she ever feel something for such a cold hearted bastard? He hurt her again, and did it with such ease.

"I'm surprised you could even give me the time, when you're always running around for Bones like his little bitch!" She blurted out.

"What?" Billy yelled as he stood up straight, rushing to Rachel. Bodie grabbed Billy's arm pulling him away from her. Rachel backed up closer to Adam's car. She couldn't believe she had the guts to talk to Billy like that. But she wasn't about to back down now.

"What Billy, your gonna hit me?" Rachel's voice rose as she stood straight. Joe jumped off Mike's car and stood next to Billy, waiting for Billy to do something he was going to regret. He knew his brother's temper, and he knew his feelings for Rachel. The mix of the two could be deadly.

"You're fuckin' lucky!" Billy screamed as he pointed to her face. His face was red and his eyes were glassed over. Rachel flinched. He looked the same way he did the day he put the gun to Heco's head.

"How am I lucky?" Rachel yelled back. "Lucky that I ever met a piece of shit like you?" Now Rachel pointed in his face. "Yeah, some fucking luck I have." Billy sniffed and grunted before he turned away and headed to his car.

"Yeah, go ahead, walk away. Go see your whore I'm sure she's waiting for you." Rachel tried opening Adam's car door but it was locked. She wanted to cry but wouldn't give him the satisfaction. How can one person, who she barely knew make her so upset. She turned to look back at Billy who was walking back to her. He grabbed his coat off of Mike's car, and then turned to leave.

"Fuckin' Bitch." Billy said as he walked away. Rachel was shaking from anger.

"Go be Bones' lapdog. That's all your good for." Rachel couldn't control herself. The words just slipped out of her mouth making Billy stop in his tracks. He turned around quickly walking fast over to Rachel. Before Bodie could reach him Billy grabbed her by her neck. His grip didn't hurt, but it pinned her against the car. His face was up against hers. Bodie grabbed Billy's arm trying to pull him off, but Billy pushed him away with his free hand.

"C'mon Billy, let her go." Bodie said.

"Billy!" Nicole yelled. Joe grabbed her whispering something in her ear.

"You know nothing about what I do." He said calmly in her ear. His breathing was heavy against her cheek. She clenched her jaw, realizing the magnitude of her comment. He was making her lose herself. This wasn't her. She didn't hurt people. She didn't make people angry at her.

"You don't fuckin' know me!" He screamed.

"Billy!" Bodie yelled. Billy ignored him, peering into Rachel's eyes. "Yo, dog!" He pulled at Billy's shoulder.

"What?!" Billy yelled looking back at Bodie. He was staring at the street.

"That's "B" Street." He said nodding towards the car that was slowly driving by. Billy let go of Rachel and turned around. Rachel stood up quickly backing away from him. Mike grabbed her arm, but she pushed him away.

"Let's go." Billy said. He looked over at Joe. "You go with Nicole in Adams car, Bodie go with Mike," He looked over at Rachel. "…And you," he pointed to her. "You're comin' with me!" He growled.

"I'm not going anywhere with you. You're insane!" Billy walked over to her and grabbed her arm, dragging her to his car. She fought him at first, and then gave in. He opened the passenger's side door and after she slid in he slammed the door. She didn't know what he was going to do. She held her breath as he jumped in the car. He started the engine and sped out of the parking lot.

They drove in silence. Billy was sitting up close to the steering wheel while he drove. His face was red and he was breathing heavy. His grip on the steering wheel was strong making his knuckles white. She leaned as close to the door as she could. Her anger had been replaced with fear. _What the hell is wrong with you Rachel? Are you the insane one? _She thought. She snuck glances at him while she twirled the end of her sleeve. She tried everything not to cry. Blinking her eyes several times to help the tears that formed disappear. He pulled into The Four Roses parking lot with such force the car jumped. He pulled into his spot and slammed on the breaks. Rachel gasped while putting her hands on the dashboard. She felt like throwing up. She glanced over at Billy. He was gazing out the windshield.

"You're making me crazy." He whispered. Rachel couldn't believe how his tone had changed. He sounded hurt, upset even. He opened the door and got out of the car. He put his coat back on and slammed the door. She watched as he walked his walk right into the bar. Rachel looked around. She could see Adam's car and Mike's car across from her. Next to Mike's car was Lisa's car.

"Son-of-a-bitch!" Rachel yelled as she climbed out of the car. She slammed the door and jogged to the doors of the bar. The music inside was loud and the place was packed. Mike, Nicole and Adam were sitting at the bar talking to Sammy. Nicole turned when she heard the door shut.

"What did he do to you?" She grabbed Rachel's arms.

"He didn't do anything. He barely even said anything."

"What has gotten into you? All the years I know you, I have never seen you talk like that to anyone."

"I don't know Nic." Her eyes watered again as she looked at her friend. "I thought I was over it. But apparently, I'm not." Rachel's eyes wondered the bar looking for Billy. All the guys were there sitting together at their table. Lisa and Jessica sat in the middle of them. Billy was standing in front of the table with his arms crossed over his chest. Jessica was looking at him, and then at Rachel. The heat from her collar rose to her face.

"What's wrong?" Nicole asked.

"She's here again!" Rachel pushed past Nicole and walked right up to Billy. She tapped him on his shoulder. He turned around slowly. His eyes narrowed when he looked at Rachel.

"I think we need to talk."

"Ah, I think you said enough."

"Billy, please." Rachel could see Jessica scooting out of the booth. She walked past them to the bar.

"I don't feel like talking." He said flatly.

"Billy," She could feel Jessica's presence again. Rachel turned her head, looking right at Jessica's smirking glare. "Oh, I see." She looked back to Billy. "So is _she_ why you don't feel like talking?" She said in a low tone. Billy sighed and put his hands on his hips.

"Enough." He said raising his eyebrows.

"Fine!" She turned to walk away when Jessica's comment cut her like a knife.

"Maybe if you knew how to keep your man happy, he wouldn't be coming to me." Everyone at the table fell silent. Rachel turned smiling at her. She took a couple of steps forward, just inches away from Jessica.

"Nah," Rachel said shaking her head. "Your _both_ not worth it." Rachel was about to turn around, then she changed her mind. No one was expecting it as Rachel's fist connected to Jessica's face. She flew back on top of the table, liquor flying all over the guys. They all jumped up. Jessica fell to the floor as Rachel kicked her. Billy put his arms around Rachel's chest pulling her away.

"Oh my God!" Jessica put her hands up to her face. "She broke my nose!" She screamed. Lisa jumped up to go after Rachel when Nicole stepped in front of her.

"I don't think so." Nicole said, Joe standing next to her. They were staring Lisa down. Lisa bent to pick Jessica up, failing miserably. Blood was pouring from her face.

"Ray knocked her the _fuck_ out!" Bodie hollered as the guys were yelling and laughing. Billy grabbed Rachel, pulling her to the door. She pushed him off of her and walked out the door. Her hand was throbbing with pain. She couldn't believe how hard she hit her. She never hit anyone before in her life. Billy looked behind him at Sammy.

"Get them the fuck out of here!" Billy nodded to Jessica and Lisa. Sammy rounded the counter and walked over to the girls. He bent down helping Jessica to her feet. Billy followed Rachel out the door. The air felt good on her face. She was sweating and trying to catch her breath.

"So, you go around hitting everyone huh?" Billy said as he lit a cigarette.

"I told you," Rachel looked over at him "Only the assholes."

Billy laughed. "Yeah you did."

"Sorry," She started walking to the street "Didn't mean to mess up her pretty little face."

"Where're you going?" He yelled.

"Home!" She yelled back at him. Billy almost growled as he ran after her.

"You're not going home." He demanded as he grabbed her arm. She pulled away so hard she lost her balance.

"I told you you're not allowed to touch me ever again!" He had anger in his face again as he grabbed her arms.

"Are we going to keep doing this?" He put his hands up.

"Doing what?"

"Fighting."

"God damn it Billy!" She screamed. Her eyes started watering. "What the hell did you do to me?" His looked at her confused. "I was this normal girl, who hardly got mad at anything. I never fought or yelled or felt what I felt until I met you!" She couldn't hold the tears in anymore. They streamed down her face. She closed her eyes. Wishing this would all go away. Billy watched as the girl he cared so much about cried. He could never tell her how he felt. It was a sign of weakness, something he couldn't afford. But holding her, kissing her, being with her was something he could do. He walked over to Rachel and grabbed her. She didn't fight him, she welcomed his embrace. He put his arms around her and pulled her close. Her face buried in his chest as she cried. Billy looked up as Mike's car pulled out of the parking lot.

"Where taking the bitch to the hospital. Makin' sure she don't pull no shit with the cops." Tommy yelled from the backseat window. "See ya tomorrow." Mike pulled away. Billy watched Mike's car until it was no longer in view. He bent his head down.

"Come home with me." He whispered in her ear. She pulled away, wiping the tears from her eyes. She nodded her head without hesitation. Billy walked to his car with his arm around Rachel. They got in Billy's car and drove away.

Billy kissed Rachel's face as she slept. He pulled himself closer to her back, placing his arms around her. She felt so right, laying there in his arms. How could he deserve something so perfect? He wanted her to know he cared about her, that his heart hurt when he wasn't with her. His temper flared at the thought of her with anyone else. She needed to know these things, but how would he tell her? He never felt this before. Never had the butterflies his brother told him about until now. He never experienced anything like this before. He touched her hair, letting it fall through his fingers. He bent his head down and kissed her neck. Her bare legs felt soft and warm against his. He wanted her to be his, and knew he had to make sure she was. It was late and he was tired, but his eyes wouldn't close. He didn't want to stop looking at her. He tried for as long as he could to stay awake, watching her breath and watching the little smiles that went across her lips as she dreamed. But his body had taken over and was finally making his eyes heavy. He closed his eyes and pushed his face closer to the back of her head.

He didn't know if his feelings for her had taken over, or if it was his lack of sleep, but he pulled his lips to her ear and whispered, "I love you." Billy drifted to sleep knowing he was the only one who knew he felt that way.

Rachel could feel her heart begin to race as she popped her eyes open. Had she heard him right? No, she had to have heard him wrong. She had been lying there, enjoying the moment as Billy thought she was sleeping. She could feel his breath steady on her neck, as hers was starting to pick up. She was trying to calm herself down. But she knew that she had heard him right.


	8. Chapter 8

**T**he black mustang pulled up to Bone's Chop Shop, and then stopped short. Billy pulled himself out of the front seat and onto the pavement. He shut the door and started up the driveway. He walked in long strides, watching everything that was happening around him. Bones' pit-bull jumped up, snapping at him, just to fall back from the pull of the thick chain that was around his neck. Billy smirked at the dumb bastard as he tried to get back on his feet. Bones' shop was only a few feet away from him. His chest tightened. He never knew what was in store going into Bones' lair. Bones had made it clear several times that he would kill him faster then anyone else would. He walked threw the open door and stopped. He looked down the long hall to Bones' office as he adjusted the strap on the bag that was thrown over his shoulder. After several deep breaths through his nose, he began his journey down the hall.

"Yo Billy!" One of Bones' workers yelled from one of the many rooms Bones had. Billy looked over to him and nodded, continuing down the hall. Billy pushed the door to Bones' office open and walked to his desk. He looked around, but there was no sign of him. He threw the bag on the desk and waited.

"You finally grace me with your presence!" Bones yelled from his back room, making Billy jump slightly. It wasn't enough for Bones to notice but enough for Billy to get annoyed.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to drop your dirty bag on my fuckin' pieces?" Bones yelled, looking at the many guns he had on his desk. Billy's expression didn't change. He stared at Bones, not moving. Bones grabbed the bag and dumped the contents on the table. Several stacks of cash fell. Bones smiled.

"Can I actually say, for the first time since I sent you and your worthless crew out on my corner that you actually made me my money, in full?" Bones sat in his chair, grabbing a gun. "And just think, I was gonna fuckin' kill you." Bones began cleaning the gun he had picked up. His thick black framed glasses fell down his nose. He moved them up with his middle finger, which was clearly directed to Billy. Billy waited for him to say something, when he didn't he turned to leave.

"How's that sweet little girlfriend of yours doing?" Bones said. Billy stopped short. "What's her name again?" Bone's continued cleaning his gun. "Oh that's right, Rachel." The heat was growing in Billy's body. He cringed at the sound of her name coming out of his mouth. He had no right speaking of her.

"I hear you two have been spending a lot of time together. She better not be interfering with your work. You wouldn't want me to have to have a word with her." Billy turned quickly. Bones was looking back at him, a devilish smirk across his chubby face. Billy's eyes were wide. Bones could see the anger in his face. Knowing he was affecting him gave Bones power. He had heard from Sara, one of the girls that used to be "close" with Billy, that Billy was an attached man now. Something none of them thought they would ever see. The girl he heard about was named Rachel and lived in the suburbs of Boston about 30 minutes from the city. She was a younger then Billy, still in High School, but quite mature for her age. Bones had dug real deep to find out everything he could about the girl who won Billy Darley's heart. Billy had tried everything in his power to keep Rachel a secret from that part of his life, but he knew better. When Bones really wanted to know something, he knew it.

Bones stared back at Billy, almost challenging him. Billy's face was red, and his nostrils flared without control. His fists clenched and his back had stiffened. He wanted to kill Bones, ending his own misery forever. Rachel had been right, he was Bones lapdog. Bones would tell him to jump and Billy would say how high and for how long. Someday it would all stop. Fear of Billy Darley and his men had risen drastically over the past year. He was taking control of everything he could get his hands on and eventually he would have control over Bones. Someday.

"You sure you want to associate yourself with a girl like that?" Bones continued his gun cleaning.

"A girl like what?" Billy finally spoke.

Bones raised his eyes back to his son. "She's not gonna be around forever you know. I happen to know the only reason she lives here is because her mother died back in LA. Where you think the girls gonna be after school's over?" Billy didn't know about Rachel's mother dying. Why hadn't she told him?

"What are you getting at?" Billy was more annoyed then before.

"You're an adventure, something fun to pass her time before she goes back to LA for college." Bones stood up, walking to his safe. He opened it placing the gun inside. "A girl like her doesn't stay with a piece of shit like you forever. She's got goals, a future. I even know she's an honor student," Bones turned to Billy, walking in front of him. "You think she's gonna throw that all away for _you_?" Their noses were only inches apart. Billy put his head back, peering down at his father.

"How's this concern you?"

"She'll be a distraction!" Bones yelled. "I don't need you fuckin' up anymore then you already do!" He pushed his finger in Billy's chest. "So have your fun with her and let her go!" Bones walked back to his desk and sat down. He leaned back in his chair, staring Billy down. "Yes, you may get the fuck out of my face now." He said in a stern voice. Billy never hated Bones has much as he did at that moment. It took everything in his power not to shoot the man. Billy turned and walked out of Bones' office, quickly walking down the long hall back out the door.

Billy opened the door to his apartment and slammed it shut. He stood there, breathing so heavy he was afraid of passing out. The sound of the door slamming made Joe rush out of his bedroom.

"Jesus Christ! You scared the shit out of me!" Joe yelled.

"Where's Rachel?" Billy said in a deep low voice.

"She took Nicole home, said she'd be back after." Joe said as he grabbed a cigarette from his pack. Billy took his coat off and threw it on the couch. He sat next to it slowly, rubbing his bald head. He let his hands rest on the top of his head for a few minutes. Joe watched his brother. His stomach began to hurt recognizing the way his brother was acting. This couldn't be good. When Billy stressed out like this, it was never good.

"Why is she taking so long?" Billy asked impatiently looking up at his brother.

"She only left about twenty minutes ago."

"I can't sit here and wait." Billy rose up quickly, grabbing his coat. He headed towards the door.

"What happened?" Joe asked standing up, taking a few steps closer to his brother.

Billy's back was still facing him. "Nothin' for you to worry about."

"I'm not a fuckin' kid anymore Billy! Stop tryin' to protect me from everything!" Joe's voice rose. Billy turned his face to his brother.

"When Rachel gets back, tell her not to leave." Billy left without another word. Joe stood there staring at the closed door. Why didn't his brother ever feel he could come to him? He may not be as tuff and as fearless as the gang, but he would kill for his brother. Billy must have known that by now.

"Thanks Ray, I'll see you tonight." Nicole yelled back to Rachel as she ran up her walkway. Rachel waved at her friend as she watched her enter her house. She pulled away heading back to Billy's apartment. The butterflies in her stomach began to flutter as she thought of Billy. Everything had been perfect between them the past two weeks. Their cat and mouse game was over and their relationship was starting. Rachel was hesitant when Billy hinted that they were together. She cared for him more then she should. She knew how he felt about her. But there was still the knowledge of who he was which kept her from trusting him. Protecting her life was something she could count on, but a normal relationship was something she couldn't see them having. But even with her doubts she had held him close as they lay in his bed. She had smiled as he whispered 'You're my girl' in her ear. She knew what she was getting herself into and she knew she had to keep their relationship a secret, at least for now. Brooke and Daniela so far didn't know and her father was the last person who needed to know. Billy understood this and was respecting it, something that even shocked her. A smile spread across her full lips. She was the girlfriend of a feared gang leader. "You really are losing your mind Rachel." She said out loud.

Rachel pulled into the parking lot of Billy's apartment complex. She jumped out of her father's jeep and headed into the building. Billy had given her a spare key, just incase she ever needed to go there. She opened the door and walked inside. The apartment was quiet.

"Joe?" She said as she headed towards his room. She knocked lightly on his door. "Joe, are you in there?" She waited a few seconds before knocking again.

"Yeah, yeah I'm up. I'm up!" She could hear Joe making noise in his room as he walked to the door half asleep. He opened his door and smiled.

"You were wide awake when I left." Rachel said.

"I didn't sleep much last night. It was quiet so I figured I'd take a nap." He smirked at Rachel.

"Where's your brother?"

"He said for you to stay here, I guess he'll be back soon." Joe yawned and scratched his head. "I'm going back to bed."

"Yeah you know what, a nap sounds good. I'll be in Billy's room." Rachel went into Billy's room and lay down on his bed. She wasn't there two minutes when her eyes became heavy and she could feel herself falling asleep.

Billy pulled up next to Rachel's truck. A smile spread across his lips knowing she was there. He quickly got out of his car and headed to his apartment. He never had a girlfriend before. Never had the desire. He always found a girl he liked took her to his bed and was rid of her by the next morning - even sometimes that same night. But Rachel was different. He really cared for her. He thought about her when she wasn't there, and would dream of her at night. His feelings grew stronger and stronger as the days went on. Bones' words burnt through his head the entire day. "_You're an adventure, something fun to pass her time before she goes back to LA for college_." He refused to believe it. He knew Rachel was attending Boston University in September. Bones couldn't breathe right without trying to tear Billy down.

The apartment was quiet as Billy entered. He slowly made his way down the hall to his bedroom door. It was slightly opened and he could see the figure lying on his bed. He took his coat off slowly and placed it on the floor. He took his boots off next to his coat and slowly made his way into bed. He lay on his side facing her. He loved to watch her sleep. She always looked peaceful and innocent when she slept. He kissed her nose and put his big arms around her. She woke suddenly jumping in his arms.

"Whoah! It's me." He whispered. She focused her eyes on him.

"I'm sorry." She was embarrassed, but smiled.

"How long have you been sleeping?"

"Not sure. I just came in here and passed out." She put her hand on the back of his head and pulled him closer to her. She kissed him softly on his lips. "Where were you?" She asked.

"I had some business to take care of." She hated when he said that.

"Well, you're here now." She kissed him again. His kisses seemed distant. She pulled away, looking at him. "What's wrong?" He rolled onto his back and looked up at the ceiling.

"What're you doing after the summers over?" Rachel stared at him for a minute, confused by his question.

"What do you mean?" She said. He looked over at her, his eyes narrowed. He looked angry, which confused Rachel even more.

"What are you doing after the summer is over?" He said slowly, almost in a mocking manner.

"I told you already. I'm going to Boston University." Billy sat up on his elbow, leaning towards Rachel. His eyes looked accusing.

"You sure? You sure you're not going back to LA to go to college. Your mother is buried there after all." Rachel's eyes widened. She sat up slowly.

"Who told you that?"

"Doesn't matter who told me." He pointed his finger in her face. "_You_ didn't tell me! How can you not tell me your mother died and that she's buried in LA? Do you really plan on going back there after high school?"

"What?" She sat up.

"It's true isn't it? I'm just something to pass your time!" He rose from the bed. He grabbed his boots and tried putting them on. His anger was blinding. Rachel got on her feet and stood in front of him.

"I don't know what you're trying to pull, but you better knock your shit off Billy!" He finished putting his boots on and went to stand up when Rachel pushed him back on the bed. "I'm not letting you run away. We're gonna talk about this." His face was furious, but Rachel refused to give in.

"I gotta go!" He yelled.

"Your full of shit, now talk to me. What would make you think you're just something to pass my time?" He could see the hurt in her eyes. He hated seeing her like that but he could never control his temper. He needed to leave her before he showed her what he was really capable of.

"I have my sources." He looked away.

"Your sources are telling you I'm going back to LA for college and that you're basically a fling?" Rachel walked to the bedroom door and opened it. "Some sources you have, asshole!" She walked down the hall and was headed to the door when Billy grabbed her arm. He never should have brought this up. He knew she wasn't leaving but Bones' words just wouldn't leave him.

"I care about you. I don't know why, but I do. I lie to my father everyday to be with you. Do you know what I could be sacrificing to be with you?" She put her head down. The anger she felt was now gone. She could feel the tears swelling up in her eyes.

"I'm sorry." He said as he grabbed her into his arms. He pulled her face up to his and started kissing her. She tried to pull away but gave into him. He picked her up in his arms and walked them back into his room, kicking the door shut. This part of Billy was something he knew she could never resist.

Billy sat at his usual table at The Four Roses watching Rachel play pool with Bodie. Nicole was with them, sitting on a bar stool watching Rachel win. Bodie was clearly upset and kept looking over to Billy for assistance. "Yo dog! Your girl is killing me over here. Come show her who's the man!" Bodie had said. "I think she's already showing _you_ Bodie." Billy had said laughing. Joe was sitting with him at their booth. He looked over to his brother as he watched Rachel.

"So, you really like her huh?" Joe said. Billy looked over at Joe.

"What do you want?" Billy said ignoring the question.

"Oh that's right, Billy Darley doesn't talk about his feelings. Not even to his brother." Joe got out of the booth and walked over to Nicole. He looked back at his brother, and then looked away. Billy sighed, lighting his cigarette. He looked over at the new customers entering the bar. Three men, one looked about Billy's age, the other two slightly older. The younger one was dressed in dark baggy jeans, a white hoodie that had the word Ecko written across the back and bright white sneakers. He had rings on his fingers and a thick gold chain with a crucifix hanging from his neck. He wore his black baseball cap slightly to the right. Billy laughed at how hard this guy tried to look younger then he was.

"Sammy!" The one Billy's age yelled. Sammy smiled at the man and shook his hand.

"Long time no see Ralphie." So that's the poser's name.

"I didn't know you were working in a shit whole like this." Ralphie laughed. His two goons chimed in. Sammy's smile faded and he looked in the direction of Billy. Billy's eyes were fixed on Ralphie. Sammy looked back at Ralphie and leaned forward.

"What's up Ralphie? What do you need?" Sammy was trying to get him out as quickly as possible.

"Alright, I get it." Ralphie looked around. The bald headed guy with tattoos everywhere was eyeing him. "I need whatever you can get me." Sammy told him to give him a minute. He headed to Billy.

"Who are these punks?" Billy said nodding his head towards the men sitting at the bar.

"The one with the baseball cap is Ralphie Moretti. The guy to his left is Gallo and the big dude is Russo." Sammy sad with his back facing Ralphie and his guys.

"What the fuck are they doin' here Sammy." Billy didn't take his eyes off of them for a second. Tommy and Jamie walked into the bar as Billy and Sammy spoke. They walked over to Billy and sat down across from him.

"He needs some stuff." Sammy never did know how to ask Billy for drugs.

"Stuff?" Billy smirked, finally looking at Sammy. His eyes quickly went back to Ralphie, whose own eyes were now fixed on the back room. Billy followed his gaze to the pool table. Was he looking at Rachel? Billy's anger shot through his body like fire. He stood up walking quickly to Ralphie and his two henchmen.

"What do you want?" He was only inches from Ralphie's face. Ralphie's questionable glare was broke. He was now looking at Billy. They were the same height and close to the same build. But Ralphie would be no match for Billy.

"Who're you?" Ralphie said in a heavy Boston accent.

"Who am _I_?" Billy huffed a laugh and smiled. "Billy Darley." The guy Sammy called Russo's eyes opened wide. He slightly elbowed the one Sammy called Gallo. Gallo's eyes were also wide. "I'm the guy you come to when you need… 'stuff'." Billy smirked. "Would you mind telling me what you were looking at over there?" Billy nodded towards the pool table. Ralphie smiled.

"I used to fuck that girl." Billy's face hardened.

"Rachel?" Billy asked threw grinded teeth.

"Rachel?" Ralphie laughed again, making Billy restrain himself from killing the guy. "I don't know any Rachel. I'm talking about that blond in the back there." He nodded towards Nicole. Billy looked over at Nicole. She didn't look like the type of girl to ever associate with someone like this Ralphie character. Then again, she wasn't the type of girl that would find his brother attractive. But there she was, smiling and laughing and in love with Joe.

"Listen, can you help me out or not?" Ralphie asked, clearly showing he had somewhere else to be.

"Yeah, I can help you." Billy grabbed Ralphie by the throat and started dragging him out of the door. Tommy and Spink were watching Billy the entire time and were now running to the two men who were inches away from grabbing Billy. The bar was now filled with yelling and cursing causing Bodie to run to the door. Joe followed telling the girls to stay in the bar. Nicole stood up and watched as the bar emptied. Rachel started walking to go see what was happening when Nicole grabbed her arm.

"Didn't you just hear Joe?"

"Nicole, can you seriously just sit here?" Nicole looked at her friend for a few seconds then started walking to the door. Outside of The Four Roses Rachel could see Billy holding a man by his hoodie on top of someone's car. He was cursing and screaming for the man never to show his face around here again. Bodie and Joe were standing in front of one of the guys while Tommy and Spink were standing in front of the third man. Rachel put her hand over her mouth. Billy was unrecognizable. She had never been as scared of him as she was at that moment. Joe was the first to notice the girls. He started screaming at them to go back in the bar.

"Nicole! Rachel! Now!" Joe yelled pointing to the bar. Hearing Rachel's name made Billy turn his head. His eyes locked on Rachel's. She looked terrified. At any other time that look would have devastated him, but when he was like this, nothing and nobody could stop him. Billy put his attention back to Ralphie. "Take you and your girlfriends here and get the fuck outta this neighborhood. If I ever see you again, I'll fuckin' kill ya!" Billy yelled.

Sammy had run out of the bar with a bat in his hand. After Joe had yelled for the girls to go back inside he started grabbing at them to get them back to safety. Nicole pushed Sammy off of her arm and walked closer to Billy. "Ralphie?" Nicole said. Everyone's eyes were now fixed on Nicole. Joe walked quickly up to Nicole.

"What the fuck?" He grabbed her arms tightly making Nicole gasp from the pain. "You know this fuckin' asshole?" He pulled her face closer to his. She had never seen Joe mad. He was now looking just like his brother.

"I…I…" Nicole didn't know what to say. She was now whishing she hadn't said anything.

"You _what_ Nicole?" Joe demanded. Billy let go of Ralphie and pushed him towards the street.

"Get the fuck outta here!" Billy yelled to Ralphie.

"Nicole!" Joe screamed. His face was red and his grip on her arms became tighter. "Did you go out with him?"

"Go out?" Ralphie said laughing. "Nah we never went out. We actually never left my bedroom." Nicole's eyes widened. She could feel Joe starting to shake from anger.

"What the fuck is he talking about?" Joe's grip was even tighter now, making Nicole wince. Her arms ached and she was scared.

"Joe, please." Nicole cried out the words.

"What the fuck is he talking about Nicole?" He shook her as he yelled the words.

"Joe, you're hurting me please." Joe ripped his hands away from her. He put his hands on top of his head. Ralphie and his boys were almost in his truck when Ralphie turned around.

"Me and your girl here were together just a couple of weeks ago." Nicole eyes widened. Joe looked at her, his eyes narrowed.

"Is it true?" He whispered. His jaw tightened as he threw his hands down. Nicole couldn't speak. She couldn't breath. Tears fell down her face. She didn't need to speak. Her eyes told him everything he needed to know. Joe looked up at Ralphie. Before Nicole knew what was happening Joe ran to Ralphie screaming. "I'm gonna fuckin' kill you!" Billy grabbed his brother and pushed him up against a car. Joe pushed and pulled at Billy, trying desperately to reach Ralphie. "You're fuckin' dead. You hear me? I'm gonna fuckin' kill you." Billy grabbed his brother's face, putting his lips next to his ear. "Not tonight." Billy whispered.

They watched as Ralphie and his boys left the parking lot. Nicole was sobbing on Rachel's shoulder. Joe was fighting back his own tears as he struggled to get out of Billy's grip. Tommy and Spink walked over to Billy, watching the white truck drive down the street.

"What the fuck Billy?" Bodie yelled. "How you just let them leave like that?"

"Not now Bodie!" Billy yelled.

"Not now? He just abused your little brother and you tell me not now?" Bodie waved his hand in disgust at Billy and walked back into the bar. Nicole pulled away from Rachel and walked quickly to Joe. Billy nodded to Tommy and Spink to stay with his brother. He walked up to Nicole and grabbed her by her throat.

"Did you fuckin' do it?" Billy screamed in her face. Rachel ran up to them, begging Billy to let her go. "Did you fuckin' cheat on my brother?" Nicole was crying hysterical now.

"Billy, stop!" Rachel yelled. She couldn't stand there and watch him attach her. Even if she was wrong, she didn't deserve this. Billy looked at Nicole. He wanted to hurt her for hurting his brother. No one hurt him and got away with it. No one. "Billy!" Rachel screamed. He let Nicole go, taking a step back from her. Rachel grabbed Nicole, pulling her behind her back. She couldn't take her eyes off of Billy. He had attached her best friend right in front of her.

"Let me go!" Joe yelled. He had fallen to the floor and was now pulling himself to his feet. Billy looked over at his brother. Billy grabbed his arm as he walked past him. "Get the fuck off me!" He walked past Rachel and Nicole. Nicole ran after him as he head back into the bar.

"Joe please, let me explain." Nicole grabbed the back of his shirt. He turned around quickly.

"Go home Nicole. I don't want to fuckin' look at you."

"No, Joe please!"

"Nicole, go before I do something I'm gonna regret!" Joe walked back into the bar. Billy walked passed Rachel, Tommy and Spink followed. Tommy opened the door to the bar and walked in, Spink followed with Billy right behind him.

"You're just going to leave?" Rachel yelled to him. He turned around and sighed.

"Rachel, please don't fight with him." Nicole said. Rachel handed her the keys and told her to wait in the truck.

"Do you want me to come back?" Rachel asked.

"Do what the fuck you want." Billy said with attitude as he lit a cigarette. Rachel's mouth opened to say something, but she decided against it. She turned to walk away when Billy grabbed her arm.

"I'm sorry." He grabbed her, hugging her tight. "I didn't mean that." She hugged him back breathing in his scent. "You should go home tonight. I need to make sure Joe's ok." Rachel nodded her head. He pulled away from her and grabbed her face gently. He kissed her, making those butterflies come back. He pulled away and looked into her eyes, resting his forehead on hers. "I'll see you tomorrow, ok?"

"Ok." Rachel said. She walked to her truck and got in. Nicole was still crying. Rachel wanted to console her friend. Protect her and comfort her.

"Nicole." Rachel put her hand on her shoulder.

"Just take me home please." Rachel started the truck and pulled out of the parking lot. Billy stood at the door to the bar and watched Rachel leave. Once her truck was out of sight he went into the bar.


	9. Chapter 9

Rachel tapped her fingers on her kitchen table, patiently waiting for the answer to her question. She looked over at Nicole with annoyance written clear across her face. Nicole had gone home the night before but couldn't sleep. She called Rachel's cell phone at three in the morning, crying. Rachel told her to come and stay at her house. She wanted to talk to her about the whole Ralphie situation, but Nicole begged her to wait until morning. Morning was here, and she wanted some answers.

"I just don't understand why you would do it." Rachel said this a few times already.

"Rachel, please. I know I screwed up." Nicole's eyes were swollen and red.

"But you love him. I know you love him. And he loves you. It's obvious." Rachel's words made Nicole's eyes swell up with tears.

"I tried calling him all morning. He won't answer his phone." She grabbed Rachel's hand. "I don't know what to do Ray. I can't lose him."

"Then why did you do it?" Rachel's voice rose. "I want to know why you did it! This isn't like you Nicole."

"Alright, alright!" Nicole put her face in her hands. She took a deep breath then looked back at Rachel. "Last summer when I was working at the lodge, you remember right?" Rachel nodded her head. "One of the summer parties I did, he was the one throwing it. He was very nice and he flirted with me the entire night. I guess I flirted back because he came to my job a few days later. He was persistent, asking me to go out with him on a date. At first I said no because he's a lot older then me, but I figured what the hell." Nicole started crying again. "I really liked him. We talked for almost a month. I went to his house after work a lot. After you went back to LA, I really didn't hang out with Brooke and Daniela too much so I spent a lot of time at his place." Nicole took a napkin and wiped her nose.

"So I guess you really didn't leave his bedroom huh?" Rachel said almost without feeling. Nicole looked at her friend, dumbfounded.

"You're supposed to be _my_ friend." Nicole's voice rose. "My _best_ friend!" She leaned back in the chair and crossed her arms over her chest.

"I am your friend Nicole. I love you and I care about you so much, but I just don't understand how someone you used to sleep with can make you cheat on the only guy I have ever seen you care about."

"I was drunk." Nicole blurted out. Rachel looked at her, not sure if she was lying or not. "A couple of weeks ago we had gone to the bar together. I was supposed to spend the night but we got into a fight. He was drunk, I was pretty drunk. He upset me so much. I called Daniela to pick me up. She was on her way to another party and I didn't want to go home. I went with her." Nicole's words stuck in her throat. She closed her eyes letting the fresh tears fall down her face.

"Ralphie was there and I started drinking more, and he was just making me feel good about myself." She opened her eyes and looked at Rachel. "Rachel, I didn't even know what I did until the next day." Rachel reached across the table, grabbing her friends hand gently.

"You need to tell Joe this. He needs to know the truth." Nicole nodded her head as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I want to tell him, but he won't even talk to me."

"Maybe he just needs to be alone for a few days." Rachel got out of her seat. She walked around the table to Nicole and hugged her.

"Good morning girls." Mr. Hedlund said as he placed the grocery bags on the counter. Rachel pulled away from Nicole looking at her father. "Is everything ok?" He asked.

"Everything is fine dad." She smiled at him. Nicole wiped her eyes and smiled.

"Just some stupid boy at school, he isn't taking me to the prom anymore." Nicole thought quickly. Rachel raised an eyebrow. Good move on Nicole's part. Her father didn't like talking girl stuff, so he would back off.

Rachel's father emptied the grocery bags as Rachel and Nicole sat in silence. Nicole was playing with her hair and biting the inside of her mouth, a bad habit she couldn't break. Rachel looked over to Nicole, her heart ached for her. She knew how much she loved Joe. She wished there was something she could do to help her. As if she read her mind Nicole's eyes widened and she leaned forward to Rachel.

"Maybe you can talk to Billy. He's practically in love with you he'll listen to what you say." Nicole said in a whisper she thought was low enough that Rachel's father couldn't hear. She was wrong.

"Who's Billy?" Rachel's father asked. Rachel's eyes widened and she held her breath. Nicole covered her mouth, here eyes saying she was sorry. Rachel looked over her shoulder to her father.

"He's a guy at school." Rachel said.

"And, your relationship with him, is it serious?' He asked. A small smile formed on his lips.

"Um…well….," Rachel wasn't sure what to say "maybe." Was all she could think of.

"When can I meet this Billy?" Rachel closed her eyes. She pictured them in the same room together and almost laughed. But this was not something she should be laughing about.

"When it gets serious."

"Fair enough."

"Ah…so…could you um…talk to Billy for me?" Nicole's eyes pleaded with her.

"Sure, I'll go now." Nicole got up and said good bye to Rachel's father then headed to the front door. Rachel turned to her father.

"Can I borrow the truck please?" Rachel smiled. Her father smiled back and handed her the keys.

"Before you go, just one question. Is he nice?" Rachel looked at her father and sighed.

"He is to me."

"Well that's all that matters then." He kissed her on the forehead and continued to put the groceries away.

Rachel knocked on Billy's door for several minutes until Joe answered. His hair was disheveled and he had pillow creases all over the left side of his face. Rachel smiled at him.

"Why didn't you use your key?" Joe asked. His voice was cracky.

"I have my dad's keys. Is Billy here?" Joe shook his head slowly while he yawned. "Do you know where he is?"

"The office."

"Oh."

"Yeah, so come back later. I'm sure he'll be home later."

"Ok." Joe smiled at her then shut the door. She left the apartment building and got into her truck. She pulled away and without thinking about it headed towards "the office".

She pulled up to the old building and stopped the truck. She cut the engine and looked around. Billy's car was parked in front of her. Heco's car was to the right and a white van was parked next to her. She took a deep breath and got out. She walked slowly to the stairs, crossing her arms over her chest. She crept up the stairs looking around with every step. The opening was dark and she couldn't hear or see if anyone was there. She took two steps into the darkness and quickly turned around going back down the stairs.

"What the fuck?" Rachel stopped dead in her tracks. She looked back to see Bodie coming at her fast. He grabbed her by her arm and walked her back to her truck.

"He sees you here, he'll kill you." Rachel looked up at Bodie with narrowed eyes. They were almost to her truck when Billy yelled Rachel's name. "Fuck." Bodie said.

"What the fuck are you doin' here?" Billy barked as he ran down the stairs. Bodie stood in front Rachel as Billy came charging across the gravel.

"I…Uh…I….," Rachel words stuttered as Billy was stopped by Bodie. She backed up as her fear of him rose. Her heart began to pound and she could feel her hands beginning to shake.

"Your not supposed to fuckin' be here!"

"What's the big deal?" Rachel asked and immediately wished she hadn't. Billy's eyes widened, he sniffed and tilted his head. He looked like he was going crazy. A groan came from his throat as he reached out to grab her. She backed up more but wasn't fast enough. He grabbed her arm, digging his fingers into her skin. She gasped as she felt herself falling closer to him. Bodie grabbed him pushing him back.

"Calm down dog!" Bodie yelled. "She didn't know."

"You don't fuckin' belong here!" Billy spat.

"I'm sorry." Rachel said as the tears swelled up in her eyes. Billy wouldn't let go of her. He didn't want her here. She couldn't be at this place. She was too innocent, too good. It was bad enough she was his girlfriend now. He knew what the future held for her being his girl, but this place, this hell whole he ran to survive was not safe for her. He could feel her pulling from him. The fear in her eyes almost excited him.

"Billy...let...go!" Rachel pulled her arm free. She couldn't believe what was happening. Bodie knew something she didn't if he was holding him back. Rachel ran to her truck grabbing her keys out of her pocket. Her fingers fumbled with the keys as she tried to put them in the door. Finally! She opened the door and jumped in. She started the truck and sped off. Billy pushed away from Bodie, turning to run to his car. He jumped in and sped off after her.

Rachel's breathing was out of control. What was wrong with him? What did he have there that would make him turn into a monster towards her? She wiped away the tears that were falling down her cheeks. Her driving was erratic. She was swerving in and out of lanes. She glanced at her rearview mirror and gasped. Billy was on her tail. He was only feet away from her when she turned quickly onto a block. He followed, beeping his horn at her. He pulled up beside her, his window open.

"Pull the fuck over, now!" He yelled. She shook her head no. He glanced at her once more before he sped up ahead of her. He pulled in front of her and stopped short. She slammed her foot on the break, stopping the car only inches away from his. Billy jumped out of his car and ran to her door. He tried to open it but she locked it before he got there.

"Rachel, open the door!"

"Billy, please go away," she cried "you're scaring me!"

"Rachel," he smacked her window "open the fuckin' door before I break the window." How was she going to explain a broken window to her father? She hesitated looking at him as she slowly reached over and unlocked the door. She held her breath, unsure of what he was going to do. He watched her open the lock and looked at her. His breathing was heavy and he rubbed his bald head. Rachel looked out the windshield as Billy opened the door. The tears were streaming down her face. He leaned his arms on the roof of the truck. His breathing was calming and his anger was leaving.

"Rachel," he said softly "look at me." She shook her head no, her lip quivering.

"Rachel." She shook her head no again. He sighed putting his head down. He put his arms down and reached over her, grabbing the keys from the ignition. "Look at me!" Rachel's face scrunched as she started to cry. She reached up wiping the tears quickly. She took deep breaths, trying to control herself. She slowly looked over at Billy. His eyes had softened his face was no longer hard.

"You," he looked her deep in her eyes "you don't understand!"

"You're right I don't understand!" She yelled, still crying. "I don't understand how you can scare me like this when I love you!" Billy's eyes narrowed. She had never said this before. He reached at her, grabbing the sides of her face, leaning in closer to her. He looked into her eyes. His lips hit hers hard. She wanted to push him away, to yell at him. She wanted to leave, never look at him again. But she didn't. She kissed him back grabbing the back of his neck kissing him harder. Billy could taste her tears as he devoured her mouth. He wanted her, more then he ever wanted her before. He hated himself for scaring her, but she couldn't be there. She could never be there again. His hand grabbed onto her hair pulling it back. She moaned slightly, making Billy want her more. He pulled away from her, watching her as she bit her lip.

"Let's go to my place." Billy whispered. Rachel nodded her head. Billy kissed her quick on the lips and put the key back in the ignition then headed towards his car. He got in and sped off. Rachel took a deep breath then pulled away. She headed to Billy's apartment confused at herself. Billy almost ran her off the road and now she was headed to his apartment, like nothing happened. She was losing herself with him. Apart of her was scared, while another part of her was loving every minute of it.

Billy kissed Rachel's neck, his goatee tickling her, making her smile. She moved over making her back press up against his chest. His body felt soft and warm up against hers. He wrapped his arm around her grabbing her hand. He put his fingers in-between hers. He pulled his hand up kissing her fingers. She turned her body around, facing him. Rachel kissed his lips.

"Did you mean what you said?" He asked.

"What?"

"That you loved me?" He whispered.

"Yes." He kissed her lips softly. He pulled away and smiled. She loved his smile. She didn't see it often, but when she did it was the most beautiful smile she had ever seen.

"Say it." He needed to hear her say it.

"I love you."

"Say it again." No one had ever told him that they loved him other then his mother and his brother. She smiled at him.

"I love you." She said in a whisper. He smiled and was about to kiss her when she put finger to his lips.

"I want to hear you say it again." She said. His eyes narrowed.

"What?" He asked.

"I want you to tell me you love me again." Billy's eyes widened. "I heard you that night, and I want you to say it to me again. To my face." He started to pull away from her when she grabbed his arms.

"Don't run away. Just say it. I need to hear you say it." He didn't want her to know. He didn't want anyone to know. He knew it was weakness when you said it. Weakness he couldn't afford to have. But there she was, beautiful and in love with him. How could he not tell her how he felt? He leaned close to her face. He kissed her forehead, then her nose.

"I love you." He whispered. Rachel smiled and her eyes watered. He hugged her, smelling her hair. Breathing her in. At that moment she knew she wanted to be with him forever. She never wanted to lose him.

"I just think you should talk to him. Explain what happened." Rachel said as she ate a slice of pizza. Billy had spent the rest of the day with her, making Bodie do his errands for him. Billy grabbed the last slice, eating it in a few bites.

"Your gonna choke." Rachel said pointing to his pizza. Billy rolled his eyes, getting annoyed as always. He swallowed the last of his pizza and wiped his mouth.

"How do you expect me to tell my brother to talk to his girlfriend who fucked some wanna-be behind his back?" He said as he lit a cigarette, raising his eyebrows at her.

"Billy, it was a mistake. Something she regrets and doesn't even fully remember."

"Ok, so she's a slut when she's shit faced. You think he's gonna wanna hear that?"

"Billy, please. Don't call her that. Just talk to him. For me if for anything." Billy sighed.

"Fine."

"Thank you." A loud knock was at the door making Rachel jump. Billy pulled himself up walking slowly to the door.

"Who is it?" Billy yelled through the door.

"It's me dog." Billy opened the door and let Bodie in. He sat down next to Rachel at the table.

"You feelin' better?" He asked her. Bodie was the only one of Billy's crew that seemed to have a soul. The rest were just there for the ride. Rachel nodded her head and smiled.

"Where's Joe?" Billy asked leaning against the counter.

"Where you think?" Bodie laughed.

"C'mon Ray, get dressed. We're goin' to the bar." Billy grabbed his coat as Rachel went to get her sneakers and jacket. The three of them left and headed to the Four Roses.

Joe could be seen at the back of the bar as they entered. Rachel didn't notice it at first, but as she walked closer she could see Joe wasn't alone. A short girl with long black hair and dark skin was on his lap. She had her fingers through his hair and she was kissing his neck. Billy smiled as he looked down at his baby brother. He was finally getting over Nicole. Rachel hit Billy when she saw the smirk.

"Ow! What the fuck was that for?" He spat. Joe jumped at the sound of Billy's voice. He looked over at Billy and Rachel who were looking down at him. The girl on his lap was pushed to the side of him and was clearly annoyed.

"Billy," Joe stood up, hugging his brother. "Ray, hey sweetheart." He leaned to hug her but she stopped him.

"Who's she?" She nodded to the girl. Joe looked back laughing nervously. Then he realized he didn't have to hide her. Nicole had cheated on him, when he was faithful to her. He looked back at Rachel, cleared his throat and smiled.

"That's Amy." He said. Rachel looked past him at the girl. She smiled a weak smile at Rachel. Rachel looked away and put her eyes on Billy. She raised her eyebrows at him. He sighed and leaned down to her ear.

"I'll talk to him after I get a few in him, ok?" Rachel smiled and kissed him.

"Thank you."

Rachel climbed into the booth. Billy took his coat off and sat next to her. Joe sat next to Amy and put his arm around her. Rachel narrowed her eyebrows at Joe, who in return raised his. Bodie grabbed a chair and pulled it to the table.

"A round's comin' boys….and ladies." A waitress Rachel had never seen before walked over with a tray of shot glasses and a bottle of Jack Daniels. Rachel made a ganging noise as Billy poured the shots.

"Are we gonna do this every time?" He asked.

"Pick something else."

"You don't like anything else, and I don't feel like fuckin' arguing."

"Fine. Jack it is." They all grabbed their glasses and downed the shots. Rachel looked over to Amy. She was closer to Joe now and whispering in his ear.

"So…Amy is it?" Rachel asked. Billy looked at her from the corner of his eye. He knew she was going to be starting trouble. Amy nodded her head, putting her hands back through Joe's hair.

"Well, I've never seen you before."

"Well, I've never seen _you_ before." She hissed. Rachel managed to pull a slight smile, reaching her hand out for Amy to shake.

"I'm Rachel, Billy's girlfriend." Amy looked at Billy, wide eyed. She reached over and shook Rachel's hand.

"So the rumors are true." She laughed, making Rachel uncomfortable. "Billy is actually a taken man. Wow, never thought I'd see the day."

"Amy, enough." Billy warned. Amy looked away, putting her attention back to Joe. Billy poured them another round. Joe leaned over whispering something in Amy's ear. She giggled an annoying giggle making Rachel mad. Rachel was slowly turning into Billy when it came to other people's stupidity and annoyance. She couldn't tolerate it for nothing. This girl sitting across from her was eyeing her while she kissed Joes neck.

Billy watched Rachel from the corner of his eye. She was staring at Amy the entire night trying to talk to her as much as possible to keep her from putting her tongue down Joe's throat. Billy had promised her he would talk to Joe, but wasn't sure if he wanted to. Nicole screwed up, and if she were Billy's girl she would have bled already. He looked over at Rachel, examining at her face. He would lose himself completely if she ever betrayed him like that. No telling what he would do if she ever went to another man for something he gave her every time they were together. He clenched his jaw and shook his head. He couldn't think about something that may never happen. Rachel noticed this and wrapped her arm around his. She leaned her face closer to his and kissed his cheek.

"You ok?" She asked. He took a deep drag of his cigarette and let it out slow, nodding his head.

"When are we gonna leave Joey?" Amy asked. Joey? Since when did anyone call him Joey? Rachel's attention was now to them. She cleared her throat and started to talk when Billy interrupted.

"We need to talk." Billy looked at Joe then rose from his seat, grabbed his cigarettes and walked to the back of the bar. Joe looked over at Rachel, shrugged his shoulders then followed his brother. Amy rolled her eyes and huffed.

"So, you and Joe huh?" Amy looked over at Rachel.

"Yeah, me and Joe." She rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Rachel smiled sarcastically "did I do something to upset you?"

"Listen, just because your _fucking_ Billy doesn't mean I have to respect you." Rachel was dumbfounded. She wasn't expecting the girl to want to be her friend, but she didn't expect that. Amy looked away towards the back of the bar. She huffed to herself again. Rachel never used her rank as Billy's girlfriend as a way to make anyone respect her or to fear her. But at that moment, looking at Amy while she played with her nails and scrunched her face up with disgust Rachel wanted her to know she couldn't and shouldn't messed with. Rachel smiled and leaned over the table. Amy felt the table wobble and looked up at Rachel.

"Because I'm _fucking_ Billy is the _exact_ reason you _will_ respect me!" Amy's eyes narrowed as she leaned closer to Rachel.

"Who _hasn't_ fucked Billy?" Amy smirked. Rachel's eyes slightly widened and her jaw clenched. She rose up quickly, her arm about to grab Amy, when Bodie grabbed her shoulders, pulling her to him. Rachel's eyes wouldn't leave Amy's. The heat rose up through her body. She wanted to hit her, rip her hair out of her head. She could feel her breathing becoming irregular. Bodie could see this and he grabbed her face.

"Look at me." He said as he pulled Rachel's face to his, her eyes still on Amy. "She's just a dump whore. Don't let her get you like this." Rachel looked at Bodie. His eyes were soft with concern.

"I didn't know you before Billy, but I do know this isn't you." Rachel's face softened. "You get mad just as fast as he does." He shook his head. "Don't lose yourself Ray. Don't be like us. Billy won't have it, and neither will I." She knew why Billy trusted Bodie with his life.

"Joe!" Billy's voice rose from the back.

"Fuck this shit. My own fuckin' brother!" Joe walked quickly from the back of the bar. He walked over to Amy and grabbed her arm pulling her out of the booth. He looked back at Billy. "You're supposed to be on my side!" Joe yelled, making the few people in the bar place their attention to them. He stormed out of the bar without another word.

Billy was about to take a drag of his cigarette when Bodie and Rachel caught his eye. His eyes narrowed and he took a step closer to Bodie.

"What the fuck is going on?" Bodie looked at Rachel noticing his hand was still on her face. He let go quickly and looked back at Billy. Bodie patted Billy on his shoulder and walked away.

"I want to go." Rachel walked to the door, Billy following. "Take me to my truck." She said as she walked to Billy's car.

"Would you tell me what the fuck is going on?" Billy barked. Rachel stopped short turning to Billy.

"Who is that girl?" Rachel asked crossing her arms over her chest.

"What girl?" His eyes narrowed.

"The one with Joe."

"Amy."

"I know her name Billy. Who is she? Who is she to you?"

"She's," Billy paused taking the cigarette out of his mouth. He looked at Rachel as her eyes squinted at him "she's nobody to me." Rachel shook her head slowly then turned to walk to Billy's car. Billy sighed and rubbed his head. He followed Rachel and climbed into his car.

They drove in silence. Billy pulled up to an empty spot next to her truck. Rachel jumped out of his car. Billy got out of the car flicked his cigarette and grabbed her arm, turning her around.

"What?" He said.

"I didn't say anything."

"That's the problem. Your leaving without saying anything."

"I know that girl was a prostitute." Billy sighed looking away. "I can tell. She dressed like one, acted like one. And I heard her tell Joe she didn't have all night."

"What the fuck are you gettin' at Ray?"

"She basically told me that you've fucked everything in sight." Billy's eyes glazed over. "Maybe even her too?"

"So what?" Billy's face scrunched with annoyance. Rachel's eyes showed her hurt. "Why does it bother you so much what I did before I knew you?" Who was he kidding? He didn't want to know anything about _her_ life before _him_. The thought of her touching someone else the way she did him make his head hurt. He didn't want to fight with her. They had done enough of that for today.

"It doesn't bother me. Just forget it." She turned to her truck and opened the door. She got in and was about to shut the door when Billy grabbed it.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

"Going home." Her head was down looking at the keys in her hand. He grabbed her chin pulling her face up.

"Hey," he could see her eyes had become glassy. He leaned in closer to her. "I love you." Rachel smiled and kissed him. Why did those words make everything better?

--

Rachel pulled into her driveway. She got out of the truck and headed to her door. It was late and she had school in the morning. She didn't want to wake her father and have him smell the liquor on her breath. She wasn't drunk or even buzzed, but he wouldn't believe her. She slowly headed to her room and got undressed. Her head just hit the pillow when her cell phone buzzed on her nightstand. She rolled over and picked it up.

"Hello."

"Why didn't you call me all day?"

"Nicole?"

"What did he say?"

"Oh Nicole, listen, he is really being a prick right now. Billy tried to talk to him and he flipped out." She couldn't tell her about Amy. She refused to hurt her anymore then she already was. "I really think he needs more time."

"Fuck it." Nicole sighed. "I was thinking about it all day. I love him and I want him, but I can't do this to myself. I'll see you tomorrow." Nicole didn't wait for Rachel's response before she hung up the phone. Rachel closed her cell and rolled back on her side. She was too tired to worry about this right now. She would talk to her friend in the morning.


	10. Chapter 10

Rachel had spent the entire morning with Nicole trying to find the perfect dress for prom. She didn't like anything in the stores while Nicole bought the first one she tried on. It was a Sage short halter dress with a ruched top and ballooned bottom. The color matched her hair and eyes beautifully. Nicole was going to look gorgeous and she wasn't happy at all. She and Joe hadn't spoken all week. He was avoiding her phone calls and making it very clear to Rachel not to let her come by the apartment. Nicole didn't want to get Billy mad so she hadn't pushed Rachel to help her anymore. Prom was important to Nicole before Joe broke up with her. Now it was just something to do. After dress shopping the girls had gone out to lunch. Billy called Rachel asking her to spend the night. This was always a problem trying to find a way to lie to her father, but Nicole had helped her out for tonight. Nicole was going to be spending the night at her cousin's house and told Rachel to say she was staying with her. After she called her father Rachel drove Nicole home and headed towards Billy's apartment.

Rachel now sat on Billy's couch reading a prom magazine Nicole had given her that morning. She flicked slowly through the pages, admiring the dresses. Joe was sitting next to her watching the movie "Saw", again. Rachel would smile at the dresses she liked making Joe look over at her. She ignored his glares and continued looking through the magazine. He had cleared his throat several times. Rachel huffed at his last attempt at getting her attention.

"What Joe?" She slammed the magazine on her lap.

"What's with the magazine?" He asked pointing with the remote.

"Um…I'm going to Prom in two weeks and I don't think they will let me in with my typical sweatpants and t-shirt so," she opened the magazine again "I need to get myself a dress." Joe laughed and shook his head.

"What?" She asked.

"Nothing, I just never got the whole prom thing with girls. But whatever." He looked back at the TV.

"That's because you're _not_ a girl." She laughed. "Can I ask you something?"

"Go ahead."

"Do you think I'm going to be attending my prom alone?" Rachel smirked at Joe. His eyes grew wide and he started to laugh. A loud obnoxious laugh. Rachel reached over and hit him with the magazine.

"What're you saying Ray? That you want my brother to go with you?" Joe leaned forward holding his stomach while the room filled with his laughter. "Can't you just see it," he wiped his wet eyes "my big brother in a tux."

"I _could_ see it. Don't be jealous because he would look gorgeous in it." Rachel laughed. The door to the apartment opened and Billy walked in quietly. He slammed the door and ripped his coat off, throwing it on the table. Joe stopped laughing. Rachel looked up at Billy, who was visibly irritated. He walked over to the frig and took out two beers. He walked over to Rachel and kissed her on the lips. He pulled away and walked over to the chair next to his brother. He handed Joe a beer and opened his. He took a long sip then looked over at Rachel.

"How long have you been here?" He asked.

"About an hour." She smiled at him then continued to read her magazine. Billy's eyes narrowed as he looked at the cover.

"Now your reading prom magazines?" He nodded towards Rachel.

"Like I told your brother here, prom is in two weeks. I need a dress."

"Don't people get laid on prom night?" Billy asked. Rachel looked up at him. Her cheeks turned pink.

"Not everyone. Not me." A smile grew on Rachel's lips. "That could change if my boyfriend would go with me."

"No fuckin' way Rachel!" His voice was loud and blunt. Her smile left quickly.

"Why not?" Billy started to laugh making Joe laugh with him.

"I think you have known me long enough now to know I don't do shit like that." Billy took another long sip of his beer. He looked back at Rachel who was now annoyed.

"Not even for me?"

"Ray, I'm not fuckin' kidding with you. There is no way I'm going to a fuckin' prom. End of discussion and don't fuckin' bring it up again." Rachel stood up quickly.

"Fine!" She stormed out of the room into Billy's bedroom.

"Fuckin' girl." Billy whispered under his breath as he stood up. He followed Rachel to his bedroom.

"What makes you think you're even going?" Billy said as he entered his room.

"Oh no! I've been planning my prom since the 9th grade. You're not taking this away from me." Rachel sat on his bed. She didn't want to fight with him. She knew where there fights led to. Billy cursing and screaming. Sometimes even breaking things, but the fights always ended well.

"Then you're going by yourself and then coming here right after." Billy crossed his arms over his chest.

"I am _not_ showing up at my own prom by myself. I'll find someone else to go with me if I have to." She looked away from him. He walked over to her quickly grabbing her chin.

"Who the fuck will you take? Mike?" She looked up at him, his jaw was clenched and his lips were tight.

"Maybe," she spat narrowing her eyes at him. Billy stepped back hitting into his nightstand knocking his ashtray to the floor. He quickly walked out of the room slamming the door behind him. Rachel grabbed the magazine she had placed beside her and chucked it at the closed door. She threw herself onto his bed, clutched his covers tight and let out a frustrated scream.

She had only been told what to do by two people in her life, her mother and her father. She had never had a boyfriend dictate her actions for her and she wasn't about to start now. Rachel jumped off of Billy's bed and headed towards the door. She opened it forcefully making the knob hit against the wall. She walked down the hall and straight into the kitchen where Billy was downing a glass of Jack Daniels. She reached for the glass and ripped it out of his grasp, making the liquid pour down his chin.

"What the fuck?" He screamed. He watched as Rachel threw the glass into the sink making it break in half. She pointed her finger in his face.

"I will _not_ be controlled, do you hear me Billy? I'm not stupid enough to let you control me. I may only be 18 but I have more brains in this head then you and your _gang_ combined." Billy grabbed her wrist pulling her close to him.

"I'm fuckin' stupid?" He screamed. Rachel stood there frozen. She knew she was making him mad but she couldn't stop. She couldn't back down to him. She couldn't sit back and watch as he slowly tried to control her.

"I'm not going to sit here and let you tell me what I can or cannot do, or who I can and cannot see." A small smirk played across Billy's lips.

"You can see whoever you wanna see," his eyebrows raised "as long as I can see whoever I wanna see." Rachel's eyes widened. She knew who he was referring to.

"You wouldn't!" Rachel's eyes squinted.

"Fuckin' try me!" Billy said as his grip on Rachel's wrist tightened. Joe jumped from the couch and walked into the kitchen.

"Ok, ok. Yo, Billy. Time out!" Joe lightly pushed Billy away from Rachel, standing between the two. He let go of her wrist and backed away. He placed his hands on his hips and threw his head back. He peered down at Rachel with that crazy look in his eyes. The anger in Rachel's face disappeared.

"So call her then. I'm sure you still have her number." Rachel said over Joe's shoulder. She crossed her arms over her chest. Her face was getting hot. Billy's cell phone rang loud in his pocket. Still looking at Rachel he answered his phone.

"What?" his voice was deep and harsh. "Yeah, I'm on my way." He hung up his phone, placing it back in his pocket. He reached over for his coat, still looking at Rachel.

"You better be here when I get back." He put his coat on and walked out the door, slamming it behind him. Rachel didn't realize how stiff her body had become until he was gone. Joe turned around shaking his head.

"You really shouldn't piss him off. You've only seen the nice side of his anger so far. Keep pushing him and you'll be introduced to someone you won't like." Joe walked back to the couch and sat down with a loud thud. Rachel uncrossed her arms and slowly walked into the living room. She stood in front of Joe, looking down at him. Joe looked at her from the corner of his eye.

"Why do you guys always have to be so difficult?" She asked him. Joe sighed rolling his eyes.

"What the fuck are you talking about? You're the one being difficult."

"All I want to do is go to my prom, something I had already planned on doing way before I ever met your brother," she sighed and threw herself onto the couch "how is that being difficult Joe?" Joe rubbed his eyes sighing.

"You fuckin' girls are always difficult." He looked back over at the TV.

"Right."

"Listen, all I'm saying is, as you know my brother has a short fuse. But with you it's even shorter because he cares about you. So when you pick a fight with him, it won't end well. He doesn't think before he flips. Been that way his whole life." Joe laughed to himself.

"I'm not going to the prom by myself!" Rachel got up off the couch and headed to Billy's room. Joe jumped up and grabbed her arm.

"Don't be stupid Rachel. He won't only take it out on you. Whoever you get involved in this little game you're trying to play will get hurt." Rachel sighed as she leaned all of her weight to one side.

"Whatever," She turned to walk away "I'll just have Nicole be my date." Joe grabbed her arm again, turning her back around.

"You had to do it right?" Joe's eyes filled with anger. "You just had to say her name?" Rachel sighed.

"I'm sorry Joe, I didn't mean it." He let her arm go and walked past her to his room. He came back out with his leather jacket on and an attitude across his face. "Joe, please." Rachel followed him to the door but he brushed her away. He slammed the door leaving her by herself.

"My God, they are _both_ impossible." Rachel walked to Billy's room. She laid on his bed and fell asleep.

* * *

Rachel's eyes shot open when she heard the banging. Her heart was pounding as she jumped from the bed. She walked in quick strides to the living room. She stopped and listened. There was the knock again. She could hear Joe laughing and then Billy. Did he call her a bitch? She opened the door and looked at the two drunken men in front of her. Joe covered his mouth, hiding his laughter from Rachel. Billy's eyes were slits, his lips a tight pucker. He pushed the door open with force making Rachel stumble back. He walked past her taking his coat off, throwing it on the couch. The smell of cigarettes and liquor filled the room making Rachel cover her nose. Joe shut the door with his foot while singing to himself. He walked into the kitchen grabbed a soda and drank the whole thing in one breath.

"Oh man, that was good." Joe placed the can on the counter. He lost his balance as he tried to take his jacket off making him laugh. Rachel placed her hands on her hips watching Joe as he wrestled with his jacket. He slammed it on the table after he finally got it off. She looked over at Billy who threw himself on the couch. He lit a cigarette, dropping his feet on the coffee table. His head tilted back as he exhaled the white smoke. Her stare was broke as Joe put his arm around her, pulling her into a hug.

"I'm sorry about before." He slurred the words. Rachel hugged him, patting his back.

"I'm sorry too." She said. He was heavy in her arms as he lost his balance again. "Ok, Joe. I think it's time to go to sleep." He laughed as she walked him to his room. She helped him in bed, placing him on his stomach. She removed his shoes as he snored loudly. She walked back to the living room to see Billy but he was gone.

She turned to walk back to his room when she walked into a wall, or so it felt. Billy was peering down at her, breathing heavy. His eyes were dark and barely open. He took a step closer to her making her take a step back. She had to admit, he looked scary. She had seen him drunk, but not like this before. She wondered how he even drove home. His eyes squinted more at her, his lips in that same tight pucker from before. His jaw clenched.

"Billy." she whispered. His eyes didn't move from her, his body standing in the same position. She took a step to the side quickly walking past him into the bedroom. She walked over to his bed, pulled back the covers when he walked in. He shut the door, making it slam. Rachel jumped looking up at him. He stood in front of the door, his chest heaving. His jaw was locked and his lips not even showing as he stared at her with a cold stare, causing shivers down her spine.

"What's wrong?" Rachel said her voice cracking as the words barely escaped her mouth. He didn't say a word as he walked to the other side of the room. He undressed, his eyes not leaving her.

"Billy," she started.

"What'd you do while I was gone?" Billy asked. His eyes taunting her.

"I slept." Rachel said.

"You sure you didn't call your friend Mike?" He barked as he kicked his pants off.

"You can't be serious." He didn't say another word as he climbed into bed, turning his back to her.

"Shut the light." He demanded. Rachel stood for a moment, debating if she should continue the conversation. She decided against it, knowing it would turn into an argument she would surely lose. She turned the light off then climbed into bed. She put her hand slowly on his shoulder. He shrugged, letting her know to stay away. Rachel looked down at Billy, wanting to hold him, wanting him to look at her. His eyes were closed his breathing steady. She laid back, pulling the covers to her chest. She stared at the back of Billy's head, wishing he would turn around.

* * *

Rachel slowly opened her eyes, trying to focus on her surroundings. She yawned, stretched then rolled out of bed. The alarm clock read 9:23 am which was too early for Billy to wake after a night of heavy drinking. She looked over at Billy as he slept. Shaking her head slightly she dressed then headed out the door.

When she reached her house her father was gone. He left a note on the kitchen table saying Nicole's mother had taken him to the store. She sighed then headed to her room. She took out clothes for the day then showered. After she dressed she made herself cereal then went to watch TV. She was watching a soap opera that could have easily been her own life when she heard the rumble of an engine outside. Her breath caught in her throat as she prayed it was a car passing. When she heard a car door slam she jumped off the couch almost falling as she ran to the front door. She opened it to see Billy walking up her walkway. He flicked his cigarette to the street as his eyes fell on her. He stopped walking, placing his hands on his hips. She walked quickly down the walkway looking up and down her block. The panic rose in her body knowing her father could pull up at any moment.

"Oh God," she said under her breath "what are you doing?" she asked as she tried pushing Billy to his car. He backed up a couple of feet then stopped.

"You leave without waking me up?" He grabbed her arms as she continued to try to push him off the walkway. He was like a stone wall, there was no use. She stopped and sighed.

"I just wanted to get home. You were sleeping I figured you'd call when you got up."

"You never leave without fuckin' waking me up!" He yelled pointing his finger in her face.

"Billy, please can we talk about this later. I'll stop by or something." Billy's eyes narrowed as he watched her look around, as if expecting someone to show.

"Who the _fuck _are you waiting for?"

"My father is going to pull up any second. I'm begging you to leave." He walked over to his car leaning on it as he lit a cigarette. He smirked at Rachel.

"I'm not goin' anywhere."

"Billy, please!" She yelled. Rachel could see the car coming down the block from the corner of her eye. Her stomach felt sick and her heart raced faster with every second that passed. She looked over as the car pulled into Nicole's driveway. Billy looked behind him watching as Nicole's mother and Rachel's father got out of the car.

"Dammit Billy!" She whispered. Rachel's father looked over to his daughter then at the man she was talking to.

"Rachel." He said as he pulled a few bags from the back seat. Rachel quickly crossed the street grabbing the bags from her father.

"Hey dad." She was scared out of her mind.

"Who's that?" He nodded to Billy.

"That's Adams friend." Nicole's mother quickly answered. Rachel looked at her confused. She smiled slightly back at Rachel.

"Scary looking." Her father said. "Why are you talking to him? Where's Adam?"

"Um…I…I met him a couple of times before, so when I seen him outside I just thought I'd say hi." Rachel felt like she was going to vomit.

"Adam's inside. I'll go get him." Nicole's mother rubbed Rachel's back as she walked past her heading into her house. Why had she lied for her? Her father closed the car door then headed across the street. He looked at the man leaning against his car and nodded.

"Nice day, isn't it?" He asked smiling at Billy. Billy's eyes narrowed as he looked at the man confused. He looked at Rachel, her eyes pleaded with him not to say a word. She followed her father into the house.

"I don't like that guy." Her father said as she closed the door. Rachel's heart sunk as the words left his mouth.

"He looks a lot scarier then he is. He's actually a nice guy."

"How old is he?"

"Not sure." She helped her father take the items from the bags then headed back to the door.

"Where are you going?" He father asked.

"Don't want to be rude dad. I was talking to him before you pulled up." She opened the door and walked back to Billy. He was standing in the same position, smoking a new cigarette. Her face was pale and her hands were shaking. Billy could see this as she walked to him.

"Why would you come here? You know my father doesn't know about us." She said as low as she could.

"Don't…seriously don't ever leave my bed again without saying something to me. You don't even want to know the things that went through my head." Billy flung his cigarette to the street and grabbed Rachel's arm pulling her to him. She pulled away from his grip, her eyes widened.

"I can't." She crossed her arms over her chest taking a step away from him. Billy stood up straight. "He may be watching Billy." Billy sniffed as his jaw clenched. Rachel was learning that was trademark of his. It meant he was about to explode. She needed him to leave.

"I gotta go." Billy spat as he walked around to the drivers side of his car. He jumped in and sped off before Rachel could say another word. She sighed as she watched him race down the block, screeching his tires as he turned.

* * *

"So you haven't talk to him since?" Nicole asked as she placed her books in her locker. Rachel had her back against the lockers, her books clenched tight in her arms. She shook her head at Nicole's question.

"I called him, I left messages. He's pissed. But what did he really expect me to do?" Nicole closed her locker. They began to walk to the stairs heading out the school doors.

"Leave it to the Darley's to make us this crazy." They both laughed.

"There they are! The two bitches that are too good for us." They turned to see Brooke and Daniela heading to them. Daniela was smiling while Brooke really looked annoyed.

"Wow, feels like I haven't seen you in weeks." Brooke said to Rachel. Rachel gave her a weak smile. She wasn't in the mood for her today.

"I've just been really busy."

"Sure you have."

"Well _I_ miss you!" Daniela grabbed Rachel into a hug. Rachel hugged her back smiling. She really did miss her friends. "I hate to cut this short, but I have to go get my dress today. Mom's waiting for us." She looked over to Brooke. "Let's go." Brooke gave Rachel and Nicole kisses on their cheeks. They watched as Daniela and Brooke made their way to Daniela's mother's car.

"Do you think she knows anything about me and Billy?" Rachel asked as they walked to the sidewalk.

"Probably. You know Brooke. She should be a detective." Nicole laughed. She looked at her watch. "Fuck!" She yelled. "I'm late for practice again. Coach is gonna kill me." She kissed Rachel on the cheek then jogged through the gate to the field. Rachel sighed knowing she had to walk home alone. She reached in her backpack and pulled out her iPod.

Rachel was so caught up in listening to her music that she didn't notice the car that had been following her. She was a few blocks away from the school and still had some time before she got home. She tripped suddenly almost falling to the floor. She looked down to see her lace was undone. She bent down tying it quickly. As she stood up a car pulled up beside her. The driver pulled the window down and leaned over the passenger's seat. He was an older heavy set man with black rimmed glasses that were tapped in the middle.

"You Rachel?" He asked with a smile. She held her breath. She had never seen this man before. "You the girl that's been dating Billy?" Rachel looked up and down the street. Not one car was seen. Not one person walking home from school or even walking their dog. She looked back at the man who was still smiling at her.

"Billy told me what you looked like." He looked her up and down. His eyes stopping at her short skirt. "The uniforms are different from when I was in school." He laughed. She tugged at the bottom of her skirt, trying to cover her thighs. He looked back at her face. "Billy asked me to pick you up from school. But I was running late."

"Billy told you to get me? He's never done that before." Rachel didn't know if he was telling the truth or not.

"Listen, sweetheart," he sighed "I have a lot of things to do. If you want me to tell him you wouldn't come, that's fine. But hurry up and let me know." According to Billy the only people who knew what she looked like was his own crew. How would this man know who she was if Billy hadn't told him himself? She took a deep breath looked around one more time then opened the car door. She climbed in slowly watching the man the whole time. He shifted himself in his seat. He looked over at her and smiled.

"Put your seatbelt on sweetheart." He said before he pulled away. Rachel looked at him then reached over and placed the seat belt over her chest. She was regretting getting into the car as he drove up the block.

"I see now why Billy took such a likin' to yah," He looked over at her then back to the road "you have to be the most beautiful girl he's ever been with." He smiled. She pulled her books closer to her chest and moved closer to the door. They were on the highway now, headed towards the city. Rachel was eyeing the man the entire ride as he talked about the weather, her school, Billy and mostly her.

"I'm sorry but I didn't get your name." Rachel said.

"You didn't get it, cause I didn't give it." He spat. "The name's Bones." Rachel's eyes widened. He noticed this and laughed. "I take it you've heard of me?"

"Um…no, not that I can remember." Billy didn't send him to get her. She knew this now.

* * *

"Nice car you got here!" Billy said as he finished his sale. "Good to see you don't have to take your 10 speed here to get your sisters dope anymore." Billy laughed. "How is your sister?"

"She's fine." The guy said.

"Your sisters been a pretty good customer of mine." He smiled. "I _used_ to be a pretty good customer of hers too." Billy grabbed the money just before the guy sped off.

"Fuckin' prick!" Billy yelled. Bodie and Joe laughed as they watched Billy.

"_Used_ to be a good customer?" Heco asked.

"Yeah jerkoff. _Used_ to be. I get it enough from my girl I don't need no one else." He walked over to Heco grabbing his lighter from his hand as he lit his cigarette. "Don't be jealous cause I got a hot girl and you don't!" Billy laughed.

"How much longer do we need to stay?" Heco asked grabbing his lighter back from Billy.

"Till Bones gets his sweaty fat ass here. We give him the money then we're good till tomorrow." Billy said. He leaned against his car lighting a cigarette.

"Yo dog." Bodie said nodding past Billy. Billy turned to see Bones car.

"Bout fuckin' time." Billy placed the bag on his shoulder. He stood waiting as they watched Bones' car pull up.

"Ladies!" Bones yelled as he waddled towards Billy. "My money?" He said pointing to the bag. Billy was about to hand him over the bag when he saw Rachel get out of the car. His eyes widened. He looked back over to Bones who was smiling at him.

"What the fuck is she doin' with you?" He threw the bag at Bones then ran over to Rachel grabbing her by her arms.

"Did he fuckin' touch you?" He yelled. Rachel shook her head no. "Why the fuck are you with him?"

"Relax son. I wouldn't spoil your precious flower here." He opened the bag taking the money from it. He walked back to his car. Billy looked over at Bones, his eyes burning through his skull. He was struggling to breathe as the bile rose up the back of his throat. He pulled Rachel behind him and was now completely facing him.

"You see how easy that was for me son?" He nodded towards Rachel. "Consider this your last warning." Bones smirked at Billy before climbing into his car. He sped off, Billy watching him until his car was no longer in view. He spun around facing Rachel.

"Why the fuck would you get in the car with him?" He shook her as he yelled.

"He said you told him to come get me. He knew what I looked like. I didn't know who he was until before we got here." Rachel said.

"Did he hurt you? Did he fuckin' touch you?" He was pulling at her clothes and her body, checking her for any signs that he had laid his hands on her.

"Billy, stop! I'm fine. He didn't do anything."

"Why would you be so stupid? What if that was someone who wanted to hurt me?" He grabbed her face with his hands. She pushed him away.

"I'm sorry but I'm not used to having to watch my back!" She yelled. Billy took a deep breath then pulled her to him. He held her tight in his arms. He closed his eyes, thankful Bones hadn't killed her. Rachel's phone rang in her bag. Billy pulled away giving her room to answer it. Rachel looked at the caller ID. Nicole's name spread across the screen. She put her finger up to Billy as she walked away. Billy turned around facing his brother.

"What was that about?" Joe asked.

"Yeah Billy, 'consider this your last warning'? What the fuck was that for?" Billy looked back at Rachel who was looking down at her feet as she talked on the phone. He turned to Joe and Bodie.

"He found out about Rachel and told me to be done with her."

"Why?" Joe asked.

"He thinks she's a distraction."

"This ain't gonna be good dog." Bodie said.

"I know." Billy looked back to Rachel. "Let's go!" He yelled to her. She hung up the phone and walked over to him.

"You guys go with Heco." Billy ordered Joe and Bodie. He climbed into his car, opening the lock for Rachel to get in. She slid into her seat looking at Billy. He grabbed the back of her neck, pulling her into a kiss. The thought of her being alone with Bones made his stomach turn. He needed to keep her safe. He had to protect her forever. He put his forehead to hers closing his eyes. "I love you." He said. The words came so easily now.

"I love you too." She smiled. He pulled away and headed to his apartment. He repeated himself over and over again how she was to never get into anyone's car that she didn't know. Even if they swore it was Billy's orders. She had told him several times that she was sorry. He kept shaking his head as they reached his apartment door.

"I know you're sorry, but for such a smart girl that was the stupidest move you could make." He said as they walked into his apartment. Rachel walked straight to the couch and dropped herself on it. Billy took his coat off and sat next to her. She looked over at him as he lit a cigarette.

"You smoke way too much." She said.

"Don't fuckin' start with me!" He warned her. She smiled at him as his face became hard again. She leaned over to him, her face above his shoulder.

"Did I ever tell you you're so hot when you get mad?" She smiled. He looked down at her.

"What?"

"When you get all tense and mad, you're really hot." She kissed his cheek. He pulled away from her and stood up.

"You're fuckin' crazy." He said as he walked to his room. Rachel smiled as she got up following him.

"What Ray?" He was getting annoyed. She stood next to him smiling. She grabbed the cigarette from his mouth and placed in it the ashtray. She reached up, kissing him. He kissed her back pulling her close to him. His hands roamed her body and he smiled when his hand fell on her bare thigh. He forgot she was in her school uniform. Easy access. He walked her to the bed as he unbuckled his belt. Their kiss deepening. Rachel was becoming impatient as she unzipped his pants for him, pushing them down past his thighs. He reached under her skirt pulling her boy shorts down in one quick motion. Without another word he was inside her. His thrusts were fast hard and impatient. He moaned breathlessly as they moved. She bit her lip to keep from screaming. She finished, him following soon after. He was now lying on top of her trying desperately to catch his breath. _I gotta stop smoking_, he thought.

"You ok?" She asked laughing. She could feel his heart pounding on her chest.

"Yeah," he stood up, fixed himself then walked back over to his cigarette Rachel had taken from his mouth. He inhaled deeply. "Your gonna be the death of me." He said to her. Rachel could hear her cell phone ringing from the living room. She fixed herself then went to answer it.

"Hello." Rachel answered trying to conceal her struggle to breath.

"I'm home and I got something for you." Nicole said.

"Really? How exciting. What'd you get me?"

"It's a surprise. Come over!" Nicole laughed.

"Alright, I'll ask Billy to drop me off."

"Your there?"

"Yeah."

"Is…uh…is _he_ there?" Nicole's voice faded.

"No, he's working." Rachel could hear Nicole sniffle. "Nicole…"

"I'm fine." Nicole interrupted.

"Ok, I'll be there soon." She hung up the phone as Billy walked behind her.

"Where are you goin'?" He asked.

"Nicole's house. Can you bring me?" Billy nodded his head. He placed his coat on then grabbed Rachel's bag. Rachel followed him as they left the apartment.

* * *

"Hey Rachel, come in." Adam said moving aside to let Rachel through the door. Billy had dropped her off a block away so her father couldn't see her getting out of his car.

"Thanks Adam, where's Nicole?"

"In my mom's room. They've been waiting for you." He smiled then walked down the hall. Rachel walked up the long staircase then down the long hall to Nicole's mother's bedroom. The room had giant double doors leading into a huge bedroom. She knocked lightly on the door. Nicole ran out of her mother's walk in closet.

"Rachel!" She screeched. She ran to Rachel grabbing her arm and pulled her to the closet. There, hanging from the middle of the room was a dress. The most beautiful dress she had ever seen. It was a black strapless flower corset prom gown. It was sheer on the stomach with black flowers creeping around the corset.

"What's this?" Rachel smiled.

"I went to go try on shoes when my mother found it. She came barreling down the store saying how she found the perfect dress for you." Rachel looked over to Nicole's mom who was smiling back at her.

"You did this?" Rachel asked.

"I was just fumbling through some dresses. I remember you saying how you really couldn't find anything." She sighed walking over to the dress. "When I saw this I thought of you. If you don't like it I can bring it back."

"Like it? I love it!" She walked over to Nicole's mother and hugged her. Nicole rolled her eyes.

"Yeah well I had to try it on you know?" Nicole interrupted. Rachel turned to her friend grabbing her in a tight hug.

"Thank you." She whispered. Her eyes glazed over. Nicole pulled away to look at Rachel.

"I'm so happy you love it. You're going to look gorgeous!" Rachel wiped away the fresh tears that fell down her face,

"Oh, tell me how much it is, I'll have my father pay you for it." Rachel grabbed her cell out of backpack.

"No , dear, that's already taken care of. Your father already paid for it." Nicole's mother said. Rachel smiled shaking her head.

"So you guys took care of everything?" Nicole and her mom nodded their heads.

"We just have to go shoe shopping, because I still couldn't find anything, and then just wait for prom." Nicole said. "I'll be right back." Nicole walked out of her mother's room. Rachel looked over at Nicole's mother. She was happy to be alone with her for a moment.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Rachel, you can ask me anything."

"Why did you lie to my father about Billy?" Nicole's mother sighed as she leaned against the wall.

"Because, I know how you feel about him. I can see it in your eyes." She sighed again. "I had that once and I let it go because of what everyone else thought. And I've been miserable ever since." Rachel's mouth opened, but said nothing.

"Why do you guys look so serious?" Nicole asked as she entered the closet.

"She's just still in shock." Nicole's mother walked over to the dress feeling it with her fingertips. "So, who are you girls going to the prom with?"

"No one. Me, Rachel and Daniela are going solo." Rachel barely smiled as an idea floated through her head. She excused herself and headed to the bathroom in the hall. She opened her cell phone and dialed a number. It rang a few times before it was answered.

"Hello." A handsome deep voice said.

"Hey Mike."

"Rachel?"

"Yeah, listen I'm sorry to bother you. I just wanted to say I'm so sorry about everything and I was hoping that maybe I could make it up to you?" Mike laughed. She pictured that beautiful smile as she heard him.

"How could you possibly make it up to me with you being Billy's girl?" Now she laughed.

"I have a proposition for you?"

"Alright….I'm listening."

"How would you like to go to my prom?" She smiled.


	11. Chapter 11

The white Hummer H2 limo pulled in front of The Renaissance, along side several other limos

The white Hummer limo pulled in front of The Renaissance, along side several other limos. The door opened and several guys wearing tuxedos got out, laughing and hollering. Brooke got out next pulling her dress up enough to not step on it. Her dark hair was pin straight with her bangs swept to the side. The faint light of the day played across her orange dress like tiny sparkles. Her date reached his hand out for her to take. She accepted smiling while rising out of the limo. Nicole, her hair falling past her shoulder in big curls was next. She waited slightly smiling at her fellow classmates as they all poured into the building. She looked over as Daniela stood next to her. Her dark blonde hair was pulled up tight with curls falling on top of her head. Thick bangs were pulled loose to the right. Her red halter dress was clinging to her chest then flared out slightly at the midriff. Nicole smiled as she watched Mike climb out of the limo. His tuxedo made him look even better looking then he was to start. His hair was done up in his usual messy do. His green eyes glittered from the settling sunlight. He smiled wide as he turned to help Rachel out of the limo. She took his hand smiling. Her long dark hair was flowing down her back in bouncy waves.

"Thank you." Rachel said to Mike as she got out of the limo. She looked over at her friends as they all walked up the long stairs. The music grew louder as they entered the room. Brooke and her date walked in first. Daniela, Rachel and Nicole followed with Mike behind them.

Rachel's eyes grew at the site of the party room. It was dark and filled with strobe lights, mirrored disco balls and dancing teenagers. Green aerial lights shown above their heads. The beams of light moved along with the heavy dance music being played. Bubbles rose from the floor rising above the balconies filled with dancers. Pillars that lined both sides of the room were covered with purple and black balloons, honoring the schools colors. Four flat screen TV's hung over the DJ's booth showing special effects and videos as the music played. The dance floor looked like a wave of dancing people moving perfectly along with the music.

"My God," Nicole said looking around the room." She squeezed Rachel's hand as a huge smile ran across her lips.

"Our tables over there." Daniela pointed to a big table to the left close to the middle of the floor.

"Whoo-Eeh! Right next to the dance floor. Exactly where I wanna be!" Nicole said dancing to the table. Rachel laughed following her friend. They all sat around the oversized table.

"Shall we ladies?" Brooke's smiled, raising an eyebrow at her friends. Rachel, Nicole and Daniela all smiled back. They ran to the dance floor. The DJ played 'Bad Boy' by Cascada as the girls danced together. Mike watched the girls and smiled. He looked over at Brooke's date.

"Mike." He yelled over the loud music putting his hand out.

"Steven." Her date said. They shook hands and looked back at the girls.

"That's some sight huh?" Mike yelled. He nodded to Rachel and Nicole as they danced together.

"So's that." Steven nodded towards Daniela and Brooke as they also danced together.

"Shouldn't they be dancing with us like that?" Mike asked laughing.

"Nah, girls tend to dance with each other like that before they even look at us." Mike and Steven watched as the girls danced for several more songs. The DJ requested for everyone to take their seats, that food was going to be served soon. Nicole was out of breath as she walked back to the table. Brooke had her arm around Rachel's waist. Daniela sat down in a huff.

"My ears are ringing so badly right now!" Rachel laughed as she sat down. She looked over at Mike. "Are you having a good time?" Mike's smile grew.

"You have no idea." He winked. The music went down and the lights grew as several men in the same uniform ran around the room with large rolling platters. They served food that Rachel wasn't even sure of what it was. But she was hungry and it smelt good. They all ate, laughed and talked about the past year. Rachel made several faces at the girls as they talked about parties she missed over the year.

"Oh, don't do that! While we were at our little parties you were in LA getting all tan and dating all those hot surfer dudes." Daniela said laughing.

"You dated surfer dudes?" Mike said Rachel raising his eyebrows at her.

"Yeah, I did. And?" She nudged his elbow with her own smiling. Mike laughed shaking his head.

"It's just a _huge_ stretch." He continued eating. Nicole's eyes grew wide at him. He must have felt her glare. His eyes looked up to Nicole's. "What?" He said to her.

"What's a huge stretch?" Brooke asked. Rachel sighed. Mike looked around at the table. Some faces he knew some he didn't. Some he just met that night. The last face was Rachel's. Her eyes were narrowed in a sad expression. He knew he may have said something he shouldn't have.

"Ah…nothing…it's just…ah…," Mike cleared his throat "she just seems like she would like them a bit more rugged." He couldn't help but smile.

"How would you know what she would like?" Brooke asked sarcastically. "She hasn't been with anyone since she's been here." Brooke's eye fell on Rachel. "Right Ray?" Rachel's face turned hot. She wasn't ready for her friends to know about Billy. Especially not Brooke.

"Right. I haven't been with anyone." Rachel looked down at her food. She dug her fork into the meat. She didn't feel hungry anymore. She was now thinking about Billy and how she wished he was there with her.

"You know, you never did tell us how you two met?" Brooke asked pointing her fork at Mike and Rachel.

"They met through Joe." Nicole spat. "Now can we talk about something else?" Nicole was clearly upset.

"Sorry." Brooke said knowing she was pushing the issue.

"_Alright class of 2008! Let's clear off those tables and get your bodies back on this dance floor. We wanna see you sweat! We wanna hear you pant! We wanna feel you dance_!" The DJ ordered. He put his headphones to his hear and starting spinning some new dance music. The same men wearing identical uniforms from earlier ran around the tables grabbing all the uneaten food. Within minutes the tables looked how they did when they first arrived. The lights went out and colored laser lights bounced to the music. Instead of bubbles there was smoke. Mist clouds rolling around all the bodies as the moved. Brooke was the first to get up, grabbing Rachel and Daniela. Mike put his hand out to Nicole, nodding his head to the dance floor. She smiled and grabbed his hand. Steven followed them. They danced together as a group for the rest of the night. Having the most fun they had had all year. Rachel's mind cleared of Billy. She wasn't missing him, because she wasn't thinking of him. At least not yet.

--

"The Firehouse is the hottest night club in the city!" Daniela screeched. "I can't believe we actually got the place for the entire senior class."

"Can we drink?" Nicole asked.

"Yes, we can definitely drink." The limo pulled up to the club and stopped. Rachel looked out the window.

"This place isn't that big. How'd they pull this off?" She asked.

"The prom gets the whole top floor. The first floor is for the regular clubbers. Which is where we'll mostly be so we can get our drink on!" Daniela said. Nicole hollered and laughed as they got out of the limo.

They exited the limo and stood in front of the door to the club. The bouncer smiled at the girls and nodded to the other bouncer. "Get these girls and their dates orange bands." He smiled. "Let them have some fun tonight." They thanked the bouncer as he handed the orange bands over to them. Rachel and Nicole looked at each other with huge smiles.

"Now the party really begins." Nicole said. The club was loud with dance music. The ceilings were high showing part of the second floor. Rachel could see some of her classmates dancing upstairs. Nicole pulled Rachel's arm towards the bar that was along the entire left wall. The wall behind the bar glowed blue and white. The bartender was dancing to the music as she poured a few shots. Nicole found a table and sat down. Mike and Steven headed to the bathrooms with Daniela and Brooke.

"I need to drink. Like, now!" Nicole said.

"Ok, want me to go?" Rachel asked.

"No, I'll go. I don't know what the girls will drink, but what about Steven and Mike?"

"Just get the guys beers and get me Vodka and Cranberry."

"Of course, that's all you drink." Nicole smiled at Rachel then headed to the bar. The bartender was quick. She grabbed the drinks then sat down next to Nicole. Mike and Steven were already back. Nicole handed them their beers.

"Cheers fellas." Nicole said, holding up her drink. They all did the same. Rachel looked at Mike and smiled. Even though she didn't have feelings for him anymore, she still found him attractive. It was hard not to smile at him. He caught eyes with her and smiled back.

"What?" He asked after taking a sip of his beer.

"Nothing, I'm just happy you came." She laughed. "So, you think we're cool now?"

"Rachel, we were always cool." His smile fell. "I definitely liked you, but your Billy's girl now and I respect that."

"I just really felt that I needed to make it up to you. I just want you to know that I want us to be friends." She put her hand on his.

"We _are_ friends." He leaned in closer to her. "And we're even better friends now that you introduced me to Daniela. She's hot." They both laughed.

"I'm so happy that you agreed to be her date. When I found out she wasn't going with anyone I grabbed the opportunity to help you both. Now you can't be mad at me anymore and she has a hot date."

"I wasn't mad at you. So let's not talk about it anymore." Mike winked at her. Daniela and Brooke returned from the bathroom. Daniela sat next to Mike putting her arm around him. She whispered in his ear making him smile. He looked over at Rachel.

"We'll be back." He shot up out of his seat and followed Daniela to the back of the club.

"Let's get this party started." Nicole raised her glass to Rachel. Rachel smiled and raised her's back. They took long sips of their drinks. And now the night begins.

--

The girls danced together and with others the entire night. The music was pumping the drinks were flowing and Rachel was feeling wonderful. Mike and Daniela had left several times throughout the night making Brooke say her usual comments about people having sex before they were married. Poor Steven didn't know what he got himself into. The song ended and Rachel had the sudden urge to use the bathroom.

"I drank too much." Rachel laughed in Nicole's ear.

"I did too." Nicole grabbed Rachel's hand and led her to the bathroom. They were laughing as they entered the door, bumping into a girl who was trying to leave.

"Damn, watch where the fuck you're going!" The girl hissed. Rachel stopped dead in her tracks recognizing the voice. She looked back but the girl was gone. _No way. Can't be_. She thought. They used the bathroom, washed their hands then headed back to their seats. Nicole stopped walking making Rachel bump into her.

"What the hell Nic?"

"You have got to be fucking kidding me!" Nicole's voice rose. Rachel followed her gaze which fell upon two girls. One was short with dirty blond hair, which Rachel didn't recognize. But the other girl, tall dark hair, good looks. She recognized her all too well. _So I did hear her voice_? Rachel thought.

"Jessica." Rachel whispered.

"Doesn't she ever go away?" Nicole asked as she headed towards the two girls. Jessica wasn't paying attention as Nicole walked up to her.

"Why must you always be where we are?" Nicole yelled over the loud music. Jessica's eyes widened when she saw Rachel.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Jessica spat.

"This is our fucking prom night. Why don't you fucking leave?" Nicole was getting louder. Rachel grabbed her arm telling her she wasn't worth it.

"Oh that's right. I forgot you two were youngins'." Jessica laughed. This now irritated Rachel. Rachel leaned forward.

"Your nose looks better." She said. Jessica quickly put her hand to her nose.

"Fuck you Rachel!"

"No fuck you Jessica!" Nicole was in her face now.

"Don't take it out on me cause your man don't want you no more." Jessica said getting right back in Nicole's face. Nicole's eyebrows narrowed. "Yeah that's right. Word travels fast when you're a slut." Nicole pushed Jessica, making her fall onto the floor. Her friend knelt down to help her up. Rachel pulled Nicole back while they both laughed.

"Have a nice night Jessica." Rachel laughed as she pulled Nicole's arm, pulling her to the dance floor.

"Let's enjoy our night. Don't let her out of all people ruin it." Rachel said. Nicole nodded and followed her friend. Rachel began dancing with Nicole again when some guy came up behind her. Nicole laughed pointing past her. Rachel turned to see and was taken back by him. He was tall and muscular but not too big. He had dark hair and light blue eyes. He smiled down at her pulling her closer as they danced. She didn't see the harm in one dance.

Jessica pulled herself off the floor. She fixed her skirt and threw her empty cup on the floor. She ran over to the bar and asked the bartender for napkins to clean her drink off of her shirt. As she scrubbed the light pink liquid out of her shirt she mumbled curses under her breath.

"Who were those girls?" her friend asked.

"Some stupid bitches."

"They really don't like you. What'd you do?" Jessica stopped cleaning her shirt to look up at her friend.

"I didn't do anything!" She yelled. "The blond one's just pissed cause' her boyfriend broke up with her and the other one's mad cause' her man had a thing for me." She continued scrubbing her shirt.

"How'd she know about your nose being broken?" Her friend was irritating her.

"God damn it Tara! Why are you asking so many fucking questions?"

"I was just wondering that's all. Plus, you seemed to have backed down from them. This is something I have never seen you do before." Jessica stopped again. She looked up at the dance floor. Nicole and Rachel were laughing and smiling and having a great time. _Wonder if Billy knows about the wonderful time his precious girl is having right now_? She thought. She reached in her bag and pulled out her cell phone. She was going to be there bearer of bad news. She was going to let Billy know about Rachel dancing a bit too close to some guy.

--

Billy rubbed the square piece of blue chalk on the tip of the cue stick several times before placing it back on the edge of the table. He blew the excess powder off the stick then leaned over, positioned himself and was ready to aim. He squinted his eyes and let the stick flow back and forth slowly as he prepared himself to win this game. He pulled the stick back one more time then pushed it forward. The balls flew around the table exactly how he planned. He stood up smiling down at his soon to be victory. After shooting three more balls in their pockets he looked over at Bodie who had his head down.

"I tell you all the time not to ask me to play." He said with his hand out. Bodie slammed a fifty dollar bill in Billy's hand without looking up. Billy placed the stick back on the rack. He lit a cigarette grabbed his glass of Jack Daniels and walked back to his seat.

"You won?" Joe asked as Billy sat down.

"Don't I always?" Billy smirked. He looked around for the new waitress and signaled her to come to the table.

"Yes?" She asked. Billy placed the fifty dollar bill on the table.

"Keep'um comin'." Joe looked down and laughed.

"What happened to playing for twenties?" He asked.

"He only had a fifty." Billy smirked. Bodie walked to the table and nodded for Joe to move over. He pulled himself in the seat annoyed about losing his last fifty. Billy eyed him through the smoke of his cigarette.

"Don't be a bitch!" Billy said. Bodie shrugged. Billy rose from his seat as he heard his phone ring from his coat pocket. He reached in grabbed it and huffed when he saw the number. "Bitch's crazy." He said canceling the call. He walked back to his seat and placed his cell phone on the table.

"Who was that?" Joe asked.

"Nobody." Billy looked at his brother. "How much did you have to drink?" Joe looked up at Billy and smirked.

"Enough to make it all go away."

"Make what go away?"

"The pain."

"Give me a fuckin' break." Billy said annoyed.

"How'd you be if this happened with you and Rachel?" Billy clenched his jaw.

"It wouldn't happen."

"That's right. I forgot. You have the best girl ever."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Billy sat up placing his elbows on the table.

"Nothing." Joe looked at his brother. He may have been drunk but he wasn't too drunk to see the anger rising in his brother's face. Billy's phone rang again and vibrated across the table. Billy picked it up cursing under his breath.

"What the fuck does this bitch want now?" He opened his phone.

"What?" He barked.

"Billy?"

"Yeah, what the fuck do you want?"

"Just thought you'd like to know what your girl's doin' right now." Billy's face hardened. He knew Jessica was after him still. She would call him every once and awhile asking if he was still with Rachel. He would tell her over and over again to stop calling. Yet here she was at the beginning of blowing up his phone. "She's grindin' on some hot guy right now all over the dance floor."

"Go kill yourself."

"You know what Billy I'm just tryin' to save you from embarrassment. The girl's too young for you. She obviously wants to have her fun." Jessica said trying to sound convincing.

"Go fuck yourself you dumb bitch!" Billy screamed into the phone then slammed it on the table.

"Who the fuck was that dog?" Bodie asked.

"That fuckin' bitch Jessica again. Tellin' me Rachel's too young for me and she's dancin' with some dude." Billy inhaled his cigarette then quickly let it out.

"You don't believe her, right?" Bodie asked. He knew Rachel would never betray Billy.

"No! She tries this shit all the time." Joe looked over at Billy.

"They're at prom tonight right?" Joe asked.

"Yeah."

"I was supposed to go with her." He whispered. Bodie and Billy laughed.

"I couldn't see you gettin' decked out for some dance." Bodie said.

"Well I was." Joe put his head down on the table. Billy's phone rang again.

"I swear to God if it's this bitch I'm gonna fuckin' strangle her." Billy picked up his phone. "Now the bitch is sending me pictures." Billy looked his phone. The message read 'Believe me now?' Billy opened it and waited for the picture to focus. There clear as day was Rachel dancing with a guy. She looked incredible, which made the anger rise that much faster. Billy stood up straight still looking down at his phone. He took a quick drag of his cigarette. His eyes were bulging from their sockets and his breathing became erratic. Bodie looked up at him and knew they were in for the worst.

"What is it?" Bodie said slowly standing.

"That fuckin' bitch." Billy whispered. "I warned her." Joe lifted his head.

"What're you talkin' about?" He slurred.

"I fuckin' warned her if she ever fucked around I'd kill her." Billy shut his phone and grabbed his coat. He threw it on and headed to the door. Bodie pulled Joe up out of the seat.

"Let's go dog. Something's fuckin' wrong." Joe got up and followed Bodie out the door. Billy was getting in his car and about to shut the door when Bodie stopped him.

"Billy, what the fuck is goin' on?" Billy's hands were squeezing the steering wheel so tight his knuckles were white. He was leaning forward and staring out the windshield wide eyed. He was pale and grunting under his breath.

"I gotta go. Where the fuck is she?" He said as he fumbled in his pocket for his cell phone. He grabbed it out and dialed Jessica's number.

"So you do believe me?" The bitch had the nerve to say.

"Where is she? Where are you?"

"The Firehouse Club." He slammed his phone shut.

"If you're fuckin' comin' let's fuckin' go!" He yelled. Bodie and Joe jumped in the car barley shutting the door as Billy sped out of the parking lot. His tires screeched as the left a trail of smoke behind.

--

"Look how sad she looks." Daniela had her head on Mike's shoulder. They were looking at Rachel from across the table. "What's wrong with her?" She said.

"She did drink a lot tonight." Mike didn't want to say that he knew what was wrong. She missed Billy and wanted to see him. She had told him several times tonight. She even told him how much she loved him and how loved her, which was something he never thought he would see from Billy Darley.

"Why don't you ask her to dance?" Daniela said looking up at Mike. He looked down at her and kissed her lips. He nodded his head and got out of his chair. He walked over to Rachel. He knelt down in front of her making her look over at him.

"You alright?" She pulled her head back and looked down at him.

"Why hasn't he called? Do you think he's mad at me?"

"Who's she talking about?" Daniela asked. Mike stood up and grabbed Rachel's hand pulling her to the dance floor.

"She doesn't know what she's talking about. She's drunk." Mike had to help Rachel start dancing which wasn't working. Then he started making her laugh, which _was_ working. The song was loud and perfect for her to just let go. The lights were the same as at proms, strobe lights and laser beams. They flowed perfectly to the beat of the music. Rachel was starting to feel better, letting the images of Billy flow out of her mind as she danced. Mike was close to her she could feel him but she didn't care. She felt like she was in her own world. She thought nothing could take this moment away from her until she heard Nicole's voice scream Billy's name.

Rachel's eyes shot open as Billy grabbed Mike throwing him to the floor. Daniela jumped out of her seat screaming for this mad man to let him go. Rachel focused her eyes then ran over to Billy. She started to bend down to stop him when Bodie grabbed her pulling her away.

"Why is Mike here?" Bodie asked her as patiently as he could.

"What?" She was confused. When did Billy get here? How did he know she was even there?

"Mike! What the fuck is Mike doing here?" Rachel looked over as Billy was punching Mike.

"No, make him stop Bodie. It isn't what you think." Bodie looked at her for a second then ran to Billy, pulling him off of Mike. Mike crawled away from Billy running to the door. He opened it quickly falling out as he ran to the street. Billy followed him, walking in quick strides. Rachel ran out the door screaming Billy's name. Brooke and Daniela had followed her. Nicole was already outside paralyzed by the person staring back at her. Her eyes filled up with tears and she started to shake. She took a step forward. She didn't know what to say or even how to act.

"Nicole." Joe whispered. He hadn't seen her in weeks. And no matter how much it hurt not to be with her, this moment was the worst of all. She stood in front of him, tears falling down her face. She looked beautiful. She opened her mouth to say something but nothing would come out.

"Oh my God Billy no!" Rachel screamed breaking Joe's concentration. He looked back across the street in the parking lot to see his brother pointing a gun in Mike's face. He had him pinned up against someone's truck, his left forearm over his neck and Billy's piece was smashed in Mike's cheek. Joe turned and ran to stop his brother. He was no longer feeling drunk.

"Billy, put it down." Bodie said. Daniela and Brooke were staring in shock. Mike's eyes filled with tears as he looked at Billy. He knew Billy wouldn't think twice.

"You know not to touch anything that's mine." Billy hissed through his teeth.

"I didn't…" Billy shoved the gun harder into his cheek making him wince. Mike squeezed his eyes shut. Rachel grabbed onto Billy's arm.

"Billy, it's not what you think please, listen to me." Rachel begged. Billy's eyes wouldn't leave Mike.

"Listen to her Billy." Mike's words shook out of his mouth.

"I could kill you right here." He yelled.

"Dog, listen to your girl. Listen to what she's gotta say." Bodie pleaded. Billy leaned closer to Mike. His eyes peering into Mike's. He clenched his jaw and tightened his lips. It was taking every ounce of him to not pull that trigger. He wanted him dead. Dead for touching Rachel. Dead for feeling a moment with her that he could never feel.

"Billy!" Rachel screamed. "I've had enough. If you don't let him go I'm gone. For good." Billy's eyes squinted at Mike, and then looked over at Rachel. Her voice was stern and her words were serious, but her eyes still showed that fear. That same fear in her eyes that had given him chills once before. She was breathing heavy and her mascara was running from her crying. But she still looked beautiful. She was beautiful in that dress, with that hair and with that look. Billy wanted to grab her, kiss her. While another part of him wanted to hurt her. She wasn't going to get away with this.

"I warned you Rachel." He hissed at her. "I told you I'd kill you if you ever cheated on me."

"I didn't cheat on you. I told you this isn't what you think." She tried to be stern with her words but they quivered as they came out.

"I don't believe you."

"Mike isn't here for me Billy. He's here for Daniela." Billy looked over his shoulder to see Daniela crying. He looked back at Rachel.

"You're lying." Rachel knew there was no talking to him. He had his mind set. She hated him right now for what he was doing. The anger was building in her chest. She wanted to scream. She didn't like being called a liar, especially not by him. Suddenly she felt the outburst come and couldn't stop it. She reached over grabbing the gun, facing it to her chest.

"You think I'm a liar then fuckin' shoot me. Kill me like you said you would if I ever betrayed you." She raised one arm up, leaving the other on the barrel of the gun. Billy's eyes narrowed. His left forearm pushed harder on Mike's throat as Rachel tugged on the gun. Nicole took a step forward then stopped. She wanted to stop Rachel for acting this way. But she didn't know now who to be more afraid of.

"If you don't trust me then fucking do it!" she yelled. Billy smirked at her as he let go of Mike. He grabbed Rachel's throat pulling her to his face. She was now in Mike's place against the truck with Billy's heavy body pressed up against hers. She couldn't breath. He slowly raised the gun to her face.

His chest was heaving, his breathing hard against her face. His mind was racing, his hands sweating. She betrayed him. He warned her. He warned her if she ever did it he would kill her. Now she was asking him to. She must be guilty. The picture burned inside his mind. Her smiling, dancing. The guy's body pressed up against hers where only he should be allowed. Then to make matters worse, Mike who she taunted him with, was there dancing with her. Smiling down at her as she moved. His finger twitched against the trigger. He wanted to pull it. Let her know he wasn't fucking around. He needed the burning in his head to stop. Why did he let her in? Why did he have to love her? This isn't how things were supposed to be. He never let anyone in. Now she was making a fool of him, running around behind his back. He couldn't let this go on anymore. He had to end this. He pushed the gun closer to her cheek. His hand tighter around her throat. He ignored the fear in her eyes. She looked at him one last time before she squeezed her eyes shut. The tears fell down her face as she whispered the words I love you.

He looked at her mouth as the words escaped. His dark hard eyes suddenly became soft. His grip on her throat loosened. He unclenched his jaw as he took a step back. She opened her eyes feeling his release on her. He was staring back at her, blinking away the sudden wetness over his eyes. Joe grabbed his shoulders making him slightly jump.

"We gotta go." He whispered in Billy's ear. Billy's head tilted back as he looked at Rachel. The girl he loved. The girl he almost killed. He slowly backed away as Joe pulled on his arm. Bodie ran up to Rachel.

"You ok?" Rachel couldn't speak. She could barely breathe. The tears fell down her cheeks without help. Nicole grabbed her face trying to make her look her way. But she couldn't take her eyes off of him. She watched as he turned and got into the passenger's side of his car. Bodie was talking to her, but she couldn't hear him. Nicole told him she would take her home and to just leave. Bodie ran to the driver's seat and jumped in. They sped off, Rachel still watching as the car was no longer in sight.

"Rachel!" Nicole yelled. Rachel looked over at her.

"I knew it!" Brooke yelled walking over to Rachel.

"Not now Brooke." Nicole put her hand up stopping Brooke from talking. Brooke moved her hand out of the way. She grabbed Rachel's chin pulling her face towards her.

"I knew something was different about you. Never anywhere to be found, smiling all the time like you have this perfect little secret that no one else can know. Some fucking secret." Brooke turned walking back to the club. Rachel watched her leave. She suddenly remembered Mike.

"Oh my God where's Mike?" She looked around until her eyes fell on Daniela cleaning off Mike's face at the far end of the parking lot. She ran over to him grabbing his arm.

"Mike, I'm so sorry." His face wasn't as bad as she thought it would be. His eyebrow was cut and his nose was bleeding. He must have blocked most of Billy's blows. He looked over at Rachel pulling her into a hug.

"Don't be sorry. Billy can't help who he is or how he feels about you." He looked at her making her cry again. "You need to talk to him before he does something drastic." Daniela made a huffing nose. He looked over at her.

"Drastic? Like this wasn't?" She said, rolling her eyes.

"You don't know him. You don't understand." He looked back at Rachel. "You really need to find him." Rachel could hear Nicole calling a cab.

"I don't know Mike. This was really bad." She closed her eyes wishing this night had never happened.

"I've known him almost my whole life. I've never seen him act this way over a girl before." Mike said convincingly.

"Why are you telling her to go to him?" Daniela yelled. "He put a gun to her face!" Mike ignored her.

"Rachel, I won't tell you what to do." He smiled at her then grabbed Daniela's arm. They walked back to the club, disappearing through the doors. Rachel wasn't sure if going after him was the best idea. But she couldn't leave it like this. She was completely in love with him and terrified of him all at the same time.

"I can't believe what just happened!" Nicole was standing in front of her now.

"I pushed him too far. He never would have done that if I didn't grab the gun."

"Seriously, what the fuck were you thinking?" Nicole said

"I wasn't." Rachel whispered.


	12. Chapter 12

The cab pulled in front of The Four Roses and stopped

The cab pulled in front of The Four Roses and stopped. Rachel looked around the parking lot until her eyes fell upon Billy's car. Next to it was Heco's.

"Looks like the whole crew may be here." Nicole said. Rachel took a deep breath and got out of the backseat. Nicole paid the cabdriver and followed her friend. Rachel's hand started to shake as she opened the door.

The place was thick with smoke, and rock music blasted from the juke box. Faces Nicole and Rachel didn't recognize were at every inch of the bar. They pushed past a herd of people before they reached the back tables. Billy's whole gang was there drinking and having a good time. Billy was sitting quiet, drinking with a cigarette hanging from his mouth and from the looks of the ashtray in front of him, he had smoked a lot. His eyes looked heavy and he was swaying slightly in the seat. Joe was next to him playing with a deck of cards staring into space. None of them noticed the two girls staring at them.

"Billy!" Rachel yelled. The gang looked up, surprised looks on their faces. Bodie stood up. Joe's head shot to the right looking directly at Nicole who was right next to Rachel. Billy slowly moved his head to the right, staring blankly at Rachel. It took him almost a minute to realize who she was. When he did he stood up, loosing his balance. Joe stood up behind him stopping him from falling.

"Rachel?" Bodie said. "What're you..." Rachel interrupted him.

"I told him he was wrong about tonight. He needs to believe me." Rachel said. Billy took a step forward. His eyes peering into Rachel's.

"Billy, maybe we should go to the apartment." Joe said grabbing his brother's arm. Billy nodded his head still looking at Rachel. Joe grabbed his brother's arm, walking him to the door. Nicole and Rachel followed. Bodie sat back down slowly watching as they left the bar.

Rachel and Nicole climbed in the back seat of Billy's car. Billy tried to get in the driver's side when Joe stopped him. "I'm fuckin' drivin'." Joe said. Billy laughed, pointing at his brother. "You're lucky I like you." Billy slurred. He got in the car with a heavy thud. He looked over his shoulder at Rachel, his face dropping. Joe drove to the apartment as fast as he could. The tension in his back was getting worse. Having Nicole in the car was killing him.

He pulled up in front of the building and they poured out of the car. It was close to 3 in the morning and Rachel was starting to feel tired. But she couldn't go home. They entered the apartment and Joe went straight to his room. Nicole stood by the door wrapping her arms around herself. Billy walked to his room, bumping into the walls of the hall as he did. Rachel waited a second then went after him. He was sitting on his bed with his head in his hands. She closed the door behind her.

"Why did you come here?" He said his head still down.

"I really don't know." She said. "I should just go home and make believe this entire time with you was a dream, a bad dream that I just want to forget." Billy raised his head when she said this. His face was hard as his eyes tried to focus on her.

"A bad dream?" He whispered. His mouth opened to say something else, but Rachel stopped him.

"I told you Mike didn't come to the prom with me." She spat. "He was Daniela's date." Billy's eyebrows narrowed. "So, your jealousy," she tried but couldn't hold back the tears as they swelled up in her eyes. "…was all for nothing." He cleared his throat and stood up, almost loosing his balance. She took a step back, her breathing becoming heavy again. She should never have come back here. But she needed him to know she was faithful. That she didn't betray him. He took a step closer to her, stopping when he saw her take another step back. He watched her chest as it rose up and down heavily. He knew she was scared and he knew it was going to take a lot more then a simple apology to get her to relax. He walked up to her placing his hand on the door behind her for balance. Her eyes looked away from him as he put his face closer to hers. He reached up with his other hand touching the newly formed bruise on her cheek. He closed his eyes remembering the look on her face as he pushed the gun into her face.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. She squeezed her eyes shut letting the tears fall. If this was anyone else she would have left, called the cops and watched as they rotted in jail. But not him. The thought of him not being with her made her ill.

"Billy," she whispered. He stopped her, putting his finger to her lips.

"Sshh..." he said his lips touching her ear. He could feel her shaking from under him. He wanted her. Needed her. He had to make her fear go away. "I never meant to scare you." His words pushed hot breath against her ear making her shake more. "I love you so much. It killed me seeing that guy near you." Rachel looked at him. "Then seeing Mike with you," he clenched his jaw "after I told you not to."

"I'm sorry." She whispered. Her eyes watered again. Billy looked her up and down. He ran his finger down her arm then across her stomach then up her chest and neck until he reached her chin. He pulled her slowly to his lips stopping as they barely brushed each other. Rachel lost her breath. How did he always do this to her?

"You look beautiful." He said. She closed her eyes as he softly kissed her lips. He had never kissed her like this before. There was passion even with him being as drunk as he was. She reached up putting her hands to his face. He took the hand he was using for balance off of the door and placed it on her back. He slowly unzipped her dress letting it fall to the floor. She almost stopped him. _Almost_. He pulled her close to him his hands on her back. They walked to the bed, still in their embrace. Small moans escaped her throat as he kissed her deeper. He pulled away taking off his shirt. She lay on the bed looking up at him, anticipation in her eyes as he took off his pants. He leaned down kissing her again. His body was heavy on top of hers.

He was taking his time, breathing in every ounce of her. He thought he had lost her for good tonight. But there she was, lying under him, her face showing the pleasure he was causing. He kissed her again, his tongue separating her lips. She opened her mouth, welcoming him. He kissed her deeply, his thrusts slow at first as he tried to make it last. He could feel her muscles tighten around him making his desire for her heighten. He quickened his pace, his movement becoming a steady rhythm. She breathlessly called his name as her nails dug in his back. He winced, and then smiled. He bit her neck lightly sending waves of chills down her stomach. He held her hands over her head with his own as he could feel her reaching her limit. The feeling of soberness was creeping up on him as he watched her face show she had reached the end. He finished shortly after. Their breathing was heavy as their bodies collapsed onto the bed.

--

Nicole sat on the couch waiting for Rachel to come out. She hadn't heard them since Rachel followed him into his room. She knew Billy was upset and after his stunt earlier she wasn't sure what he was capable of. She could understand why Rachel couldn't turn away so easily. She felt the same way about Joe, except Joe had made up his mind about turning away from her. She put her head in her hands taking in a few breaths as she thought about seeing him for the first time in weeks. Her stomach cramped as the horrible pain of missing him resurfaced. She loved him more then anyone else. She missed everything about him. Why couldn't he just listen to her? She just wanted him to know how much she needed him.

"Where are they?" Nicole's head shot up at the sound of Joe's voice. She looked at him wide eyed. She didn't know what to say. Her words were caught in her throat. He looked back at her for another second then stormed past her headed towards the door. Nicole knew this could be the last opportunity she had to tell him she was sorry. She stood up quickly as he opened the door.

"Joe!" Her voice was louder then she anticipated. He stopped, his back still facing her. She hadn't expected him to stop, but there he was waiting for her to talk.

"What?" He simply asked. She took a few steps forward. Her hands planted at her sides.

"Could you please talk to me?" She begged. His grip on the doorknob tightened. He didn't want to talk to her. He didn't even want to be near her. But he didn't leave. Instead he slammed the door shut, turned and quickly walked up to her. Her eyes grew wide and she backed up as he came towards her.

"Let's talk then." He barked.

"I…I'm…" Her words stuttered as she looked into his eyes. Being this close to him was torture. She wanted to grab him, kiss him, and feel him how she used to. The anger in his eyes told her he felt different. "I'm sorry." She said.

"You're sorry?" His face scrunched up as he said the words. He smirked at her. "What are you sorry for? That you fucked someone else, or that you got caught?" Those words stabbed Nicole like knives. She stood there shaking, tears forming in her eyes.

"I didn't mean for this to happen. I never meant to hurt you." He shook his head as he waved her words off. He didn't want to hear anything she had to say as he headed back towards the door. She couldn't let him leave. She needed him to hear this. She walked forward grabbing his arms.

"Joe, no! Please listen to me?" He shrugged her off of his arm trying to open the door. She pushed against the door. Not letting him leave.

"Nicole. Get away!" He demanded. She wouldn't listen. She pushed her back flat up against the door. He looked over at her, his face twisted with anger.

"I'm giving you one last chance to move." He hissed through his teeth.

"No!" She pushed herself in front of him. Their faces only inches apart. His jaw clenched and she thought she heard a growl escape from deep in his throat. He flared his nostrils as he grabbed neck. She gasped, her hands grabbing at his.

"How could you fuckin' do this to me?" He voice was unfamiliar. She started to cry begging him to listen.

"I didn't…" she hesitated. Not knowing if he would believe her, "…I didn't know what I did. Not until it was too late." Joe's face softened. He let go of her, backing away. She leaned forward, rubbing her neck. "Listen to me please," she straightened up and took a step closer to him. He didn't move. His eye just stared at her. "The last thing I remember is waking up and him telling me we," she lowered her eyes.

"You expect me to believe that?" he said, his voice low.

"Yes!" her eyes falling on him again. "I do, because it's the truth. For all I know he's lying about the whole thing." He didn't know why but he believed her. He didn't think much after this point. The site of her standing there beautiful in that dress made his anger decrease. He reached over, grabbing her face pulling her into a kiss. She kissed him back putting her hands on his face.

"I'm so sorry." She said as she kissed him. "I promise you I will never go near him again." He pulled away from her.

"You don't have to worry about ever going near him." His eyes almost smirked as his lips tightened. A chill ran down her spine as he realized what he meant.

"What does that mean?" Nicole said nervously.

"Nothing for you to worry about." He grabbed her in another kiss. He started to unzip the back of her dress when she stopped him.

"What're you doing?"

"I haven't seen you in weeks." Her mind erased of all thoughts as a different kind of chill was now going through her entire body.

"Not here." Nicole whispered looking around. Joe grabbed her hand and pulled her to his room.

--

Rachel's eyes slowly pulled open as she awoke. Her hair was in her face and falling around her as she pushed herself onto her elbows. She looked around, confused. She moved her hair from her eyes and looked beside her. Billy's feet were inches from her face. "What the hell?" she said. She leaned her weight onto her right elbow as she looked behind her. Billy was sleeping on his stomach, his arms hugging his pillow. His blanket was gone and the sheets were a mess barely covering their naked bodies. She smiled remembering the night before. They must have passed out immediately after. She lifted her foot tickling his side with her toes. He moaned loudly before telling her to stop. She pulled herself up, crawled to him and lay on his back.

"Good morning." She whispered in his ear.

"Mornin'."

"How are you feeling?" She laughed.

"I'm good." He smiled. She moved off of him as he sat up. His legs fell to the floor in a loud thud. He rubbed his eyes cursing under his breath. Rachel climbed out of bed and opened the top draw Billy had given her. Billy looked behind him, smiling at Rachel as he watched her look for clothes, naked. She could feel his eyes on her. She turned her head to him and smiled.

"Like what you see?" She bit her lower lip.

"Get dressed before I throw you on the bed." She laughed at his seriousness. She grabbed her bra and panties and a pink tank top and grey Capri sweats. She got dressed then went to open the door when Billy grabbed her pulling her against him. He narrowed his eyes at her, but not with anger.

"What?" She asked.

"Do you forgive me?" He asked as he put his hands on her face.

"Billy…I…," He placed his forehead on hers as she put her hands on his wrists. She hadn't thought about what he did since she woke up. But now the images were in her head, the embarrassment slowly resurfacing.

"Tell me you forgive me." He said looking into her eyes. She loved him and wanted to be with him. She didn't understand the power he had over her. But it was there, controlling any rational thinking. She closed her eyes knowing she didn't want to say the words. But she could fell herself saying it anyway.

"I forgive you." She whispered. He kissed her forehead then her lips. He pulled away from her, a small smile spreading across his lips. She turned and walked out of the room, leaving as he started to dress. She went into the kitchen and stopped when she saw Joe standing in front of a girl, who was sitting on the counter, her legs wrapped around his waist. She was about to say something when she realized it was Nicole.

"Holy shit!" Rachel said. Joe turned quickly, Nicole laughing when she saw the look on Rachel's face. Rachel smiled walking over to them. "So, you two?" She waved her finger from Joe to Nicole.

"Yeah, we're good." Joe said, kissing Nicole on the cheek. Nicole jumped off the counter and hugged Rachel.

"Question is," Joe sat down at the kitchen table, lit a cigarette, threw the lighter back on the table then looked up at Rachel. "Are you and my brother ok?" Rachel sighed and sat across from him.

"Well…," she smiled "we did make up quite nicely last night."

"I'm surprised your even here. Billy was set on thinking it was over." Joe said. Her smiled faded.

"No, it's not over but it'll take me a long time to forgive him, even though I told him I did already. I just didn't want to fight." She sighed. "I really love him Joe."

"I can tell." Joe laughed sarcastically.

"Thank God no one from school saw. From what I could see it was only us out there." Nicole said sitting next to Joe. "It really would have been bad if anyone from school witnessed that." Rachel lowered her eyes. She remembered Brooke and Daniela. They had witnessed what Billy did. She didn't want them to know of their relationship yet but now they did. And they found out by him pulling a gun on her and Mike.

"What's she doin' here?" Rachel looked up at Billy standing in the living room. He lit a cigarette and was waving out the match glaring at Nicole through squinted eyes. Joe cleared his throat.

"She spent the night." Joe said looking at his brother. Rachel's sat up; her eyes going from Billy to Nicole then back to Billy. His stance was intimidating. His legs were slightly apart, his shoulders forward and his head back. Nicole's cheeks turned red as Billy's eyes burnt through her. She looked at Joe, her eyes pleading with him to say something. Joe looked back at Nicole, giving her a weak smile.

"We talked Billy." He looked up at his brother. "Everything is fine now." Billy crossed his arms over his chest as he took another drag from his cigarette.

"Oh, I see." He exhaled. "So you're _fine_ with her fucking some other guy?"

"You know what Billy; don't worry about my girl, just worry about your own!" Joe said rising from the table. Billy's hands fell down to his sides as his brother rose. Neither of them said a word. Joe was defending his decision to be with Nicole. He wasn't about to let Billy interfere with that. A knock at the door broke the tension in the air. Billy walked away from Joe and headed towards the door.

"Who is it?" He barked. He couldn't make out what the person on the other side said, but he knew it was a girl. He thought he heard her say Rachel's name. He opened the door quickly making the girl on the other side of the door step back.

Daniela's eye's widened as she looked back at Billy. He was shirtless, wearing only dark blue jeans and boots. His boxer briefs slightly shown above his belt. She couldn't help but stare at the tribal tattoos that ran up both arms across his chest and up his neck. Billy grew an annoyed look on his face as the girl just stood there and gaped at him. He sighed as he placed his right arm along the door.

"Who're you?" he said. "What do you want?" His voice sounding as annoyed as he looked. The tone of his voice broke her stare, snapping her back into reality.

"Is Rachel here?" she asked.

"Who're you?" Billy asked again.

"Daniela?" Rachel came up from behind Billy. Her face showed the confusion she felt. Daniela looked over at Rachel and smiled.

"Hey," Daniela said. She reached over and hugged Rachel. "I'm sorry to just barge in but, your father called my cell because he couldn't get through on yours. I told him you were sleeping and I would wake you and have you call him back." She pulled out her cell and handed it to Rachel.

"How did you know where Billy lived?" Rachel asked motioning for Daniela to come inside. Billy moved out of Daniela's way, looking down at her as she passed.

"I spent the night at Mike's." She smiled. "He told me where to find you."

"Ok, let me call my dad. Tell him I'm fine." She looked over at Billy. "I'll take this in your room." He nodded at her as she headed towards his room.

"Daniela." Nicole said. Daniela looked over at Joe then back to Nicole and smiled.

"Your only wearing a t-shirt that I'm going to assume is his." She smiled. "I'm happy for you." Nicole hugged Daniela.

"I'm gonna go get dressed. Will you be here when I come out?" She asked Daniela. Daniela nodded her head. Joe smiled at Daniela before he followed Nicole to his room. Daniela looked over to see Billy looking at her. She was happy they were alone. She needed him to know something. She took a step closer to him.

"Because I love Rachel and I want her to be happy, I will support her decision to be with you because it's obvious she loves you." She picked up her hand and pointed her finger at Billy. "But I swear to God you ever pull shit like last night again and I will not hesitate to go to her father and tell her whose bed she's been sleeping in." Billy sniffed and tensed up his jaw. Who did this girl think she was telling Billy what to do? They looked at each other for several seconds before Billy realized he needed to keep his cool. Rachel would not stand for him to harm her friend. Daniela raised her eyebrows waiting for him to say something. Billy took a step closer to her.

"I will _never_ hurt again." His finger was now pointed at her. "But don't you _ever_ threaten me again, do you hear me? I don't take kindly to people who threaten me." He barked. Billy looked up as he heard Rachel walking down the hall. He backed away from Daniela and walked over to Rachel. He grabbed her face and smacked his lips to hers. Rachel kissed him back. He smiled at her then headed to his room. She watched him go then looked back to Daniela.

"Wonder what that was about." Rachel laughed. She handed Daniela her cell phone. "Thanks for covering for me." Rachel looked down. "After last night…" Daniela waved her hand.

"Listen, I'm not like Brooke you know that. I mean that was some scary shit, but…" She smiled at Rachel trying to let her know everything was ok. "I'm here for you. I will accept your relationship with him and be there for you if things don't work out." Rachel hugged Daniela.

"Thank you." Rachel said pulling away from Daniela.

"He scares the shit out of me. I'm not kidding. But I have to say," Daniela smiled. "Wow! He is hot." They both laughed as Nicole walked into the living room.

"What are you guys laughing about?" Nicole asked putting her arm around Daniela's shoulder.

"She was just telling me how hot and _scary_ Billy is." Nicole shook her head smiling.

"Oh God." Joe said as he walked into the kitchen grabbing his cigarettes. "Who doesn't think he's hot. It's pretty sickening." Nicole walked up behind Joe and wrapped her arms around his stomach.

"Don't worry baby. I think you're hot." Nicole said. Joe smiled.

"Ok, I really need to get going." Daniela kissed Rachel and Nicole then walked to the door. She waved to Joe as Rachel let her out.

"Thank you again." Rachel said as she watched her friend walk down the hall. She closed the door and turned back to Nicole and Joe. They were kissing each other. How happy they both looked again. She didn't want to interrupt them so she headed to Billy's room.

She walked in the room, walking straight to his bed, when she was grabbed from behind. "Hey…" Billy said as he turned her around. "Why was she here?"

"Daniela?"

"Yeah." He said annoyed.

"My father called her. You were standing right there when she said it."

"So she's with Mike?"

"Yeah…" Rachel narrowed her eyebrows at him. "And?"

"You'll be seeing a lot more of each other now huh?" Rachel sighed.

"You have to be kidding me Billy." He just looked back at her. He clenched his jaw hard and looked away.

"When I think of Mike, all I see his him close to you, dancing behind you like that." His nostrils flared as Rachel pulled him closer. "Then that other guy you were dancing with…"

"Wait, what other guy?" Rachel interrupted.

"That fuckin' guy that was dancing behind you, his dick rubbin' up against you." It took Rachel a few seconds to remember what he was talking about. But how would he have known about that? He didn't show up until almost an hour later. Jessica's face suddenly flashed in her mind. She remembered how pissed she was that Nicole had told her off and knocked her on her ass. Who else could have told him? She looked up at him her mouth open, her jaw falling. Her eyes narrowed and she pushed him away.

"What the fuck Ray?" He said stumbling back. She pointed her finger in his face.

"Last night happened because of that _bitch_!" Rachel yelled. "You put a gun to Mike's head…to my fucking head…" Her voice rising. "…Because of _her_!"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Billy yelled back.

"She called you didn't she? She fucking called you and told you about that guy?" Rachel could feel her heart pounding. She fought back the nausea that was rising up her stomach.

"She did call me…so fuckin' what?" Billy spat.

"_So what_?" Rachel's voice almost squeaked. "Why is she still calling you? Why are you still talking to her?" Her arms were now at her sides, her hands in tight fists. She never felt the rage she was feeling right now.

"I'm not still talkin' to the bitch. She's just fuckin' jealous of you. She knew I would get mad so she called me to tell me what you were doing."

"Which was nothing!" she yelled.

"Didn't fuckin' _look_ like nothin'." His voice rose above hers.

"_Look_ like nothing?" her eyes squinted.

"God dammit Ray!" He turned away from her pulling his drawer on his dresser open. She walked right up next to him. Billy sighed.

"What do you mean _look_ like?"

"Nothing!" He slammed the drawer closed. "This fuckin' conversation's over!" He yelled as he stormed out of the room putting his shirt over his head. Rachel followed him into the living room where Nicole and Joe were still heavy in their make out session.

"This conversation is _not_ over!" Rachel yelled making Nicole and Joe turn their attention to them. Billy stopped short turning quickly facing Rachel.

"I'm not fuckin' talkin' about this anymore. I have shit to do!" He yelled. Nicole took a step closer to them as they yelled at each other.

"Whoah! What the hell is going on?" She asked. Rachel swung her head to the left looking at Nicole.

"What's going on?" Rachel yelled. "Billy's little girlfriend Jessica is the whole reason everything happened last night. The stupid bitch called him and told him I was dancing with some guy." She looked back over at Billy, his hands now on his hips. "And I'm assuming she sent him a picture of me with him."

"Why are you still talking to her?" Nicole asked Billy.

"Shut the fuck up about it!" Billy spat. Joe took a step closer to his brother.

"Don't tell her to shut the fuck up!" Billy's eyebrows rose at his brother.

"What?" Billy said.

"You're not going to talk to Nicole like that. I would _never_ talk to Rachel like that." Joe said his voice stern.

"No, you wouldn't," he threw his head back, his lips tightening, "cause she isn't a cheating whore." He hissed threw his teeth.

Joe could feel his anger rising as the last words fell out of Billy's mouth. He looked over at Nicole who looked as if she'd been smacked clear across her face. Her eyes were wet with fresh tears. She hugged herself, taking a step back.

He didn't think before he could feel his body moving towards Billy. His arms were spread open as he grabbed his brother, tackling him to the floor. Billy was caught off guard as his little brother started throwing punches. Billy almost laughed as he brother tried desperately to get just one punch. Joe's fists flew around hitting Billy's arms, not once hitting him in the face where he tried so hard to connect. Joe thought quick letting his leg slide up between Billy's legs with force. His arms fell down to cover his groin when Joe saw opportunity. Joe lifted his arm high letting it crash against Billy's jaw. Billy winced, feeling the pain shoot through his jaw and up his cheek. His squeezed his eyes shut as his stomach burned and his jaw throbbed. Joe sat trying to catch his breath as he looked down at Billy.

Billy's eyes shot open as he grabbed his brother throwing him to the floor. He sat on top of him. His legs on either side of Joe's torso. He pinned his brother's arms down with one hand letting the back of his other smack across Joe's cheek.

"Are you fuckin' done now?" Billy said breathlessly as he grabbed Joe by the throat. Joe cried out in pain as he tasted the blood in his mouth.

"Billy enough!" Rachel yelled grabbing his arm. "Dammit Billy, your choking him!" Rachel tried pulling his hand off of Joe but he was like concrete. Rachel backed up looking down at them. Billy released his grip on Joe's neck and then smacked him lightly across the cheek. He pointed his finger in Joe's face.

"Don't you ever fuckin' put your hands on me again! You hear me?" Billy yelled. Joe nodded his head as he brother climbed off of him. Billy walked over to the cabinets, pulled out a bottle of Whiskey and opened it. He took a long swig then slammed it on the counter. He grabbed his coat off of the chair then opened the front door. He slammed it behind him making the walls shake. Nicole burst into tears as she ran to Joe kneeling beside him on the floor.

"I love you." She whispered into his ear. She helped him to his feet. He looked over at Rachel, her face sympathetic.

"Don't look at me like that." He told her. He sat at the table and lit a cigarette.

"Why did you do that?" Nicole yelled. "He could kill you, without even trying."

"If my brother really wanted to hurt me he would have." Rachel sat down next to him.

"I'm so sorry Joe." Rachel reached up to touch his cheek when Joe waved her hand away.

"Don't be sorry. You didn't do anything." He inhaled a deep drag from his cigarette. "Just go get him to cool off." Rachel nodded her head and went into Billy's room to throw on a pair of sneakers she had left there. She ran out of the apartment and down the stars. She ran outside to see Billy walking up to his car. She jogged over to him calling his name. He stopped, put his head back and sighed.

"What Rachel?" His voice was deep and raspy.

"He was only defending her. The same way you would have me!" Billy turned around facing Rachel. He leaned against his car.

"He knows better Ray." He said. Rachel sighed. She wasn't sent out there to fight with him. Joe wanted him to cool off.

"I'm sorry I got mad about Jessica calling you, as long as you never answer the phone again when you see her number." Billy grabbed her by her waist pulling her to him. He grabbed the back of her neck pushing his lips onto hers. He pushed her against his car, his body pressing up against her. He moaned softly making Rachel giggle through their kisses. Billy pulled away looking at her.

"What?" He asked.

"What do you thinks going to happen Billy? Think I'm going to have sex with you in broad daylight, on your car?" She smiled. He smiled back leaning for another kiss.

"If I didn't have to be somewhere, you _would_ be on my car having sex with me right now." He gave her his devilish smile. "How're you getting home?"

"Cab."

"Will I see you later?"

"I don't think tonight." Rachel said. Billy huffed through his nose. "Graduation is this week. I have stuff I have to do. Then, I'm all yours." He hugged her putting his face in her neck.

"I gotta go." He pulled away and opened his door. She smiled at him as he got in his car. She saw him wave for her to go inside. She turned and ran back into the apartment building. She needed to get home and finally prepare to graduate.


	13. Chapter 13

Ok, sorry for the long wait! This is more of a filler chapter. But I hope you enjoy!!

It had been over a month since the gun incident with Billy. Rachel and her friends graduated from school, finally able to start their summer. Nicole got a job at the Lodge again and talked Rachel into joining her. She hadn't seen Billy as much as she wanted. He was working a lot, making up for his crew's incompetence. Joe had been with him, trying to make as much money as they could in hopes that Bones would start laying off of Billy's relationship with Rachel. So far Bones hadn't pushed the issue, but they knew he would start again. It was only a matter of time.

Rachel started working with Nicole for some extra cash, but also to keep her busy while Billy was working. She liked the job. It was simple and fun. They cooked and served food for parties. It was amazing to her how many people threw themselves parties for no reason. Today they had to be at work by 8 in the morning to prepare for a four hour welcoming home party. Rachel got in her father's truck and started the engine. She yawned as Nicole climbed in the passenger's seat.

"Mornin'." Nicole said. Her oversized sunglasses hid her tired eyes.

"Mornin'." Rachel said finishing her yawn. She grabbed her aviator sunglasses and put them on. She sighed and pulled out of the driveway and headed to The Lodge. They were both in uniform, green t-shirt with The Lodge written across the front and Staff written across the back in black letters, black shorts -that to Rachel were a bit too short for a family place- and black sneakers. Rachel had her hair pulled back in a pony tail while Nicole's fell down in waves.

"You know your gonna get hell again for not wearing you hair back." Rachel said looking over to Nicole. Nicole smiled.

"I'll put it up when I get there." She sighed. "Wouldn't want to get Mr. Asshole upset."

"Oh, someone's in a bitchy mood this morning."

"Sorry." Nicole leaned forward facing Rachel. "So did you think about my offer?" Rachel nodded her head. A few days before Nicole had gotten into a blow out with her mother –something that happened more often then not-. Nicole's father had been home for this one and suggested that Nicole get her own place. That would give her the space she needed and help her with her mother's disappointment with her. She loved the idea but wanted Rachel to move with her.

"I thought about it. I've decided that I want to." Nicole squeaked grabbing Rachel's shoulder. "I just don't know how to break it to my father."

"Well, my dad said he'll find a place for us, and help with the first years rent. We both have jobs now so we can split the bills and I have money saved, so I'm sure I can get a cheap car. We'll be fine." Nicole said barely taking a breath.

"I know. It's not that part he's going to be upset about." Rachel pulled up to a red light and stopped. She looked over at Nicole. "It's him being alone again."

They talked about moving some more on their way to work. Rachel decided she was going to talk to her father after work. She really wanted her independence. She couldn't move far because they were both starting school in September so she would still be close by. The thought of Billy being able to stay at her house whenever he wanted made her smile.

The party was a breeze. It was for a girl who went to college in Paris and had just graduated. She had come home to take the summer off then was starting a new job in September. Her entire family was there and they were happy, fun people. They were also very generous people, giving Rachel and Nicole very hefty tips.

"Ray, that guy just handed me a fifty dollar bill." Nicole said walking up to Rachel as she washed some bins.

"He gave me one too." Rachel laughed.

"Wow today is a good day. First you agree to move in with me, now we got the biggest tip I think we will ever get in our lives." Nicole wiped down the counters as she smiled.

"I'm so dreading this conversation with my father." Rachel sighed.

"My father can't get rid of me fast enough and yours will most likely beg you to stay."

"Yeah," Rachel sighed again as she finished her cleaning. "Let's just get this done so we can get out of here." Rachel and Nicole finished cleaning the kitchen. They talked to their boss then headed home. Rachel's father wouldn't be home for a few more hours giving her enough time to take a shower, get dressed and prepare herself for her discussion.

--

Rachel cleaned the dishes she made from dinner and headed to her room. The front door opened as she walked up the stairs. She looked down to see her father looking up at her with his charming smile.

"Hey dad." She walked back down the stairs.

"Hey sweetheart." He closed the door and headed to the kitchen. "Did you eat?"

"Yup."

"Good, because I ate at work." He got him self situated then sat down to look through the mail. She sat next to him, figuring now was a better time then any to tell him of her plans. She cleared her throat to get her fathers attention. He looked up at her and raised his eyebrows.

"I need to talk to you." Rachel said. Her father placed the mail back on the table and sat up straight. "It's not bad dad, you don't have to look at me like that."

"Ok, so talk then." He crossed his arms over his chest.

"Nicole's getting her own place," she hesitated "and I think I'm going to move with her."

"You haven't even had this job a month. How are you going to pay the bills?" He asked.

"Well, Nicole's dad is going to pay the first year's rent for us. We'll be in charge of the other bills. Plus Nicole has some money saved, so she will buy a car just to get back and forth." Her father did say anything back. He just looked at her. "If I have to get two jobs then I'll get two jobs."

"If you have two jobs then how will you fit in full time school?" He asked as he shifted his weight.

"Dad, listen," she sighed. "If this doesn't work I can always move back home. I just really want to do this."

"Ok." He nodded his head. "I'll be ok with this, as long as you don't move too far."

"Wow, that was a lot easier then I expected." She smiled.

"Your eighteen now, legal age to leave if you want to." He put his hand on her arm. "Plus I know your smart and will always make the right decisions." He went back to his mail, smiling to himself. Rachel looked at him knowing she hadn't made the right decisions lately. She sighed deeply and headed up stairs. She told her father she would be back down later. She wanted to call Nicole with the good news.

"Hey Ray." Nicole said laughing.

"What're doing?" Rachel asked lying on her stomach on her bed, her phone rested between her shoulder and her cheek.

"I'm with Joe. He's being fresh." Rachel heard her whisper for Joe to stop. She didn't want to know what she wanted him to stop doing.

"Well, I have good news. I talked to my dad and he gives his blessings."

"That's great news, because I have something to tell you." Rachel could tell Nicole was smiling. "My dad found an apartment for us. So you better get packing because we move in next week."

"Nicole, that's awfully fast no?"

"Don't be scared. This is going to be amazing. It's only about twenty minutes away and it's closer to school. My father made sure of that."

"I better go break the news to my father."

"Well after you do, come meet us at The Four Roses." Rachel didn't feel like going out but she figured she might as well go tell Billy the good news.

"Ok, I'll be there in about an hour." Rachel hung up with Nicole and headed down the stairs. Her father was watching the news in the living room.

"Dad?" He looked behind him, his eyes trying to adjust in the dark. "I just talked to Nicole, and" she sat next to him on the couch. "Her father found an apartment, 20 minutes from here. Closer to school."

"That's good." He gave her a weak smile.

"We move in next week though." His eyebrows raised and he sighed.

"Ok." He leaned over and hugged Rachel. "I'm proud of you, you know that?" She nodded her head. "I'm not mad, if that's what you think." She pulled away from her father. She looked at him and smiled.

"You really are the coolest dad ever." He laughed, shaking his head.

"What do you want?" He knew her all too well.

"Your truck. Nicole wants me to meet her at her friends." He nodded his head reaching in his pocket for the keys. He handed them to her. She leaned over and kissed him on his head. "I love you dad."

"I love you too." She got her things then left the house and got into her father's truck. She pulled away and headed to The Four Roses.

--

"This is fuckin' bullshit!" Billy yelled into his cell phone. Joe was sitting across from him, his drink shaking on the table as his brother pounded his fist. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't come there and put a fuckin' bullet in your head Heco?" Billy's voice rose above the music, making a few people sitting at the bar look over. He slammed his fist on the table again. His own drink now spilling. "I'll come there and beat your girl down in front of you if you don't fix this!" Billy slammed his phone shut. He clenched his teeth as he slammed the phone onto the table.

Nicole scooted closer to Joe, grabbing onto his arm as she watched Billy. She wondered how Rachel could be so mouthy with him at times. How she wasn't scared of him. He looked like a monster when he was mad. Joe had told her he could never control his temper. Since he was a child his anger would consume him, making him act before he thought.

"That fuckin' useless piece of shit!" Billy yelled grabbing his shot glass and chucking it across the room, smashing it against the wall. The amber liquid splashed on Nicole and Joe as the glass flew above their heads. His elbows fell on top of the table before he dropped his head into his hands, trying to control his breathing. Baggy shifted his weight next to Billy. He backed away as far as he could. Hoping he didn't get the brunt of Billy's anger. Billy sniffed loud, pulled his head back and closed his eyes. He reached in his jeans for his cigarettes and lit one. He inhaled letting the smoke slowly escape his mouth. He looked over at his brother who was staring back.

"Your gonna work tomorrow." Billy's voice was raspy. His words crackled as he spat them at Joe. Joe's eyes widened. His mouth opened to protest making Billy's anger double. "Don't fuckin' argue with me!" he yelled. "Heco is gonna clean this mess he made alone so you take his shift tomorrow."

"What the fuck happened?" Baggy asked before downing the rest of his beer. Billy's stern glare fell on Baggy.

"What happened?" Billy said in a mocking voice. "What always fuckin' happens! I trust you incompetent pieces of shit to do what you have to do and I get fucked!" He looked over at Sammy and motioned for him to bring him another drink. Baggy's sister Stephanie was cleaning off a table by the front door when Sammy yelled for her. He handed her four glasses and a newly opened bottle of whiskey. She placed them on her tray and quickly walked it over to Billy. She began to take the glasses of the tray when she looked at her brother. He raised his eyebrows and nodded his head, motioning for her to quicken her pace and leave. She moved faster knowing not to piss Billy off anymore then he already was.

Billy could hear the door to the bar open as he downed two shots. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and looked up. Rachel came walking over with that perfect smile on her face. Billy realized too late that he was smiling back at her. He felt Joe's eyes on him and coolly looked over at him. Joe's smirk told Billy he had been caught being vulnerable for a split second. Billy cleared his throat as he pulled his back straight.

"Hey," Rachel said as she bent down to kiss Billy. She could feel the tension in his kiss. "You ok?" He nodded at her as Joe moved over giving Rachel room to sit. Rachel said hello to Nicole and Joe then looked over at Baggy. She hadn't been this close to him since their incident outside of the bar. She felt uncomfortable and it was obvious he did too. They caught each other's eyes making Rachel feel obligated to say something.

"Hey Baggy." Baggy looked over at Billy who's eyes were narrowed at Rachel. He cleared his throat then gave her a weak hello.

"I gotta use the head." Baggy told Billy. Billy climbed out of the booth, staring down at Baggy as he walked passed him to the back of the bar. Rachel may not have been his when Baggy had pulled that stunt, but the image he saw still burned inside of his head. He slowly climbed back into the booth and poured himself another shot.

"What're you doin' here?" Billy said with the glass at his lips. He threw his head back letting the liquid slide down his throat.

"Um…nice to see you too." She said, her eyes falling on her lap. Billy sighed. He didn't want to fight with her. He was happy she was there. He reached his hand over to her chin. He lifted her head until their eyes met.

"I didn't mean it like that." She gave him a weak smile. "Ok?" He raised his eyebrows. She nodded her head.

"Well, I did come here for a reason." Rachel said. She got herself more comfortable in the seat and leaned forward. "I'm moving into my own apartment." Billy narrowed his eyes at her.

"Why?" he said flatly.

"Because I want to." Rachel sighed. "I thought you'd be happy." She leaned back in the seat crossing her arms over her chest.

"Move in with me." Joe choked on his drink and started to cough. Billy ignored him, still staring at Rachel.

"What?" she laughed.

"Move _in_ with me." He wasn't asking her. It was more like a demand.

"Billy, I'm not moving in with you." She shook her head.

"Why not!" He snapped.

"Because I already have an apartment." She glanced over at Nicole. "Me and Nicole got an apartment together." Joe lowered his head; he knew he brother was going to lose it. Billy's nostrils flared so hard they turned red. His grip on his glass tightened.

"You got an apartment?" Rachel nodded her head. "Don't you think it's a bit dangerous for two girls to be alone?"

"No, actually I think it'll be fun."

"Fun?" A smirk shown on Billy's face. "So you two just want to have fun huh?" He squinted his eyes at Rachel, who in return squinted hers.

"What's the big deal with me and Nicole having a little fun?" Rachel asked. Billy eyebrows narrowed at her.

"Don't you think she's had enough fun?" He barked, nodding at Nicole.

"Billy, enough!" Rachel demanded. She could feel Joe moving against her as Nicole was pushing him to move. Rachel climbed quickly out of the seat, Joe right behind her. Nicole pushed past both of them as she ran to the door.

"Thanks bro!" Joe said annoyance clear in his tone. He jogged to the door after Nicole. Rachel watched as Joe left the bar, and then placed her attention back on Billy.

"What the hell was that for?" She said sitting back down. Billy shrugged as he took a drag from his cigarette. "Dammit Billy! Joe forgave her, why can't you?"

"Why didn't you talk to me before you found a place?" Billy ignored her question. "Why didn't I know you were even thinking about moving?" He leaned forward raising his eyebrows.

"Billy," she sighed "my father would know about us if I moved in with you. I just can't have that right now." Billy leaned back taking a quick drag of his cigarette. He was getting restless in his seat as he looked around the bar. "Besides, I know your father thinks I'm in the way as it is. I wouldn't want to make things worse for you." Billy's eyes shot back to Rachel.

"How the fuck do you know about that?" he spat.

"I'm not stupid Billy." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Plus I heard you talking to Joe about it." Billy shook his head at her.

"You better start keeping your nose out of my conversations if you know what's good for you!" he growled at her. He dropped his cigarette in the empty glass and climbed out of the seat. She could hear him grunt with annoyance under his breath as he walked to the back of the bar. Billy was trying his hardest not to fight with her since the prom. Every time they got into a heated argument Billy would leave for awhile to cool down. But more often he would slam a door, usually multiple times making sure his point was getting across.

The door to the Four Roses slammed open and Joe rushed in. "We gotta go!" He yelled to Rachel. "Now she's pissing _me_ off." Rachel stood up confused.

"What happened?" She asked.

"I know Billy is fucked up for what he said, but she's out there trying to make me take sides. I just can't Rachel." Joe sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. "Billy raised me. I owe him everything. I can't take sides. I know I get mad but that's the Darley blood. But I," Joe stopped, looking up at Billy as he stalked out of the back of the bar. Billy didn't say one word to them as he grabbed his coat and threw it on. He reached in his pocket and grabbed his keys. Joe and Rachel watched as Billy left the bar. They looked at each other, both realizing he would be alone with Nicole. Joe ran out first, Rachel right behind him.

"Billy!" Rachel said louder then she wanted. He stopped in the middle of the parking lot and turned. He walked over to Joe and handed him his keys. Joe grabbed them, looking at them as if they were foreign objects.

"What's this for?" Joe's eyes rose to Billy's.

"Take my car I'll drive Rachel's truck." Billy put his hand out to Rachel waiting for her to hand him her keys. She reached in her pocket and handed him the keys, uncertain. He sighed at her snatching them out of her grasp. He walked to her truck, opened the door and hopped in.

"I guess we'll meet you at the apartment." Rachel said to Joe as she walked away. This was going to be an interesting night.

Billy was clearly uncomfortable as he drove the truck to his apartment. Rachel could see him shifting his weight in the seat and rubbing his head. He looked like he wanted to jump out of his own skin. Rachel smiled to herself. He could be so cute when he was acting immature. She sighed to herself and ran her fingers through her hair. She leaned back in the seat and closed her eyes.

"I swear to fuckin' God Ray, I ever catch guys over in your apartment," he shook his head breathing heavy through his nose. "I'll…" He couldn't finish the sentence. He didn't know what he would do. But he knew it wouldn't be good. Rachel opened her eyes and looked over to him.

"You still have no trust in me?" He huffed and smirked. She sat up in her seat, her face closer to his. "I can't believe you just said that. I want _you_ in my apartment, no one else!" She yelled.

"But Nicole is going to be living with you!" He was now yelling.

"So what the hell does that mean?" Rachel knew where this conversation was headed. He was never going to let this go. She had to make him see she made a mistake. Billy stopped short at a red light. He looked over at her with his eyes narrowed.

"Do you realty want to do this?" He said as he roughly placed his arm on the back of her seat.

"You know what Billy," She pointed her finger in his face making his eyes widen with anger. He hated when she did that "after I caught you practically humping Jessica outside of the bar, who by the way is my arch fucking enemy, I told you I never wanted to see you again, that you could never touch me again. But here I am, after swearing I hated you."

"What the fuck does that have to do with anything?" He yelled.

"I forgave you! Even though the images burned in my head, I still forgave you!" She said pushing her finger into his shoulder. He squinted his eyes and narrowed his brow as he looked down at her finger. His head was still down when his eyes shot up at her.

"Forgave me?" He barked. He wanted to say more but bit back his words trying not to fight with her. He grunted as he faced the steering wheel. His hands smacked the wheel hard before he pressed his foot on the gas.

They pulled up to the apartment building. Rachel gasped as Billy slammed on the brakes. She smacked him in the arm as he opened the door to get out. He ignored her shutting the door behind him. Rachel climbed out of the truck wondering how the rest of the night was going to go.

Billy climbed the stairs to the second floor then headed to his door. Rachel was right behind him, he could feel her eyes burning the back of his head. He opened the door to his apartment and walked in. Joe and Nicole looked up at him from the couch. Billy squinted his eyes at them. He didn't want to argue so he made his way to the kitchen, roughly opening one of the cabinets. He grabbed a bottle of whiskey and a glass. He slammed the cabinet shut making Nicole jump and stormed passed them down the hall to his bedroom. Rachel shut the front door and jumped when Billy slammed the bedroom door.

"You ok?" Rachel asked Nicole. Nicole looked up at her through bloodshot eyes.

"I wish he didn't hate me."

"He doesn't hate you," Rachel said. Joe huffed a laugh.

"He fuckin' hates her." Nicole looked over at Joe. Her face showed how much those words hurt.

"I fucked up ok. I know that and I'm sorry. Why can't he let it go if you let it go?"

"Listen, I think he's taking it out on you because of me. Let me talk to him ok?" Nicole looked up at Rachel and tried to smile. She climbed off the couch and walked to Joe's room. Rachel sighed as she headed down the hall. She opened Billy's door and walked in. He was lying on the bed, his back up against the headboard. A cigarette hung from his mouth, the open bottle of whiskey between his legs. Rachel closed the door then walked closer to the foot of the bed.

"Are we going to talk about this?" She asked crossing her arms over chest. Billy looked at her through the smoke rising from his cigarette.

"What the fuck is there to talk about?"

"How about why you're so angry?" She asked her voice getting louder. "I thought you would be happy." Billy put his head back and closed his eyes.

"Fuckin' thrilled." He spat.

"Should I leave?" She asked annoyed. His eyes shot open. His lips tightened in a thin line as his eyes looked down at her. He didn't say anything as he placed the bottle to his mouth and took a chug of the whiskey. He pulled the bottle away whipping the liquid that dripped down his chin. Rachel looked back at him, her mouth open in shock. He placed the cigarette back in between his lips and inhaled. He let the smoke slowly leave as he stared back at her.

"Fine!" Rachel threw her hands to her sides. "I'll go!" Rachel walked to the top drawer Billy had given her and opened it with force making the drawer hang out. She started grabbing her clothes that she formed over the past few months. She opened his door and headed towards the living room. A few seconds later she was back in Billy's room grabbing the rest of her stuff. Billy watched her as she ran back and forth from his room to the living room. He slowly leaned his head forward, his eyes narrowing.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he yelled. Rachel stopped at the door and looked back at him.

"I'm fuckin' leaving!" She spat before turning and storming out of his room. Billy's chest tensed. His jaw clenched. She can't leave him. She can never leave him. Billy slammed the bottle on the night stand and threw himself off the bed. He stormed after her down the hall. She was opening the front door with bags in her hands when she noticed Billy standing in the living room.

"Now you take all your shit with you when you leave?" Billy growled as he threw his hands on his hips.

"That's what you do when you never plan on coming back!" She hissed. Billy dropped his eyebrows that were raised. His chest was moving up and down quickly. Rachel knew he was pissed and knew he would do something stupid. But she didn't care. She was sick of how mad he got all the time at her lately. Even with him trying his hardest not to fight, he still got mad over every little thing. She couldn't take it anymore. Going home and going to sleep was the only thing she wanted to do right now. Billy took a few long strides over to her ripping the bags from her hands.

"You're not fuckin' leavin'!" he yelled as he threw the bags behind him. He placed his hands back on his hips. His face angry. Rachel made a frustrated noise from her throat knowing she couldn't get her things back.

"Keep it! I don't need that shit anyway." She turned to leave then stopped. "You'll have something to remember me by." She walked out the door, slamming it behind her. Billy stared at the door, waiting to see if she would come back. After he realized she wasn't playing he ripped the door open.

"Fuckin' bitch." He said under his breath. He could see her walking to the stairs and he started to jog. She didn't hear him behind her as she started down the stairs. Billy grabbed her arm pulling her back up the stairs.

"What the hell," Rachel said losing her balance. She looked up at Billy's face, twisted with anger.

"Get off of me!" she yelled as she tried to pull from his grip. She knew this was a losing battle but she wouldn't give in that easily.

"Get back in the fuckin' house!" he said annoyed.

"No!" she yelled.

"Rachel," he was losing what little patience he had left, "get back in the house, now!" he yelled. He was pulling her up the stairs and back into the hallway. She wasn't giving up. Billy sighed realizing this was going to be an endless fight. He bent over and picked her up and threw her over his shoulder making her gasp. She knew she wasn't getting off of him so she gave in. Resting her elbows on his back, she paced her chin in her hands and sighed.

Billy walked back into the apartment kicking the door closed behind him. He walked back into his room and dropped Rachel on his bed. He stormed out of his room coming back with the bags she tried to leave with. He closed his door, taking a deep breath. He placed the bags on the floor and looked at her. Her arms were crossed over her chest and she glared at him.

"Don't pull that shit again Ray!" he sighed walking to his bed. "You made your fuckin' point." He sat back in the same spot, placing the bottle back between his legs.

"Did I Billy?" She turned to face him. "Because I don't think I did." He sighed again. When he wasn't mad anymore, she shouldn't be mad anymore. That's what he was used to. Once he was over something, everyone else was too. Not her. Not Rachel. She wasn't over something until he made her over something. He smirked knowing she could never resist him. He placed the bottle back on the table and leaned forward grabbing the back of her neck. He pulled her closer, his lips kissing her neck.

"Not this time lover boy." She said pushing him away. "This shit needs to stop!" Billy grunted as he sat back.

"What the fuck is gonna make you stop?" He spat.

"Well, first off, stop treating Nicole like shit. Your brother is a big boy. He wanted her back. Respect that." Billy huffed as he grabbed his pack of cigarettes. He pulled one out and lit it.

"What else?"

"Stop giving me attitude over every little thing. You've been a real jerk lately." She leaned closer to him. "How much more of this do you honestly think I'm going to take?" Billy's eyes widened.

"Are you threatening to leave me?" He said ripping the cigarette out of his mouth.

"Here we go!" Rachel threw her hands up and was about to climb off the bed when Billy grabbed her.

"Alright!" he yelled. "I'll try. With both things!" Rachel let out a small laugh. She never had seen him give in so easily.

"Well, that's good enough I guess." She smiled.

"Can I have a kiss now?" He asked coolly. Rachel laughed, never hearing him say that before.

"Well, I know how hard that was for you so I think I can do more then a kiss." Billy's eyebrows raised as Rachel climbed on top of him. She took her jacket off and threw it on the floor. She leaned down kissing Billy. His hands ran under her shirt and up her back. He knew she could never resist him.


	14. Chapter 14

"This place is great

"Home sweet home." Joe said as he threw himself on Nicole's bed. He had just brought the last box in from Rachel's truck. He yawned as he stretched himself across her bed. "I'm gonna take a nap." Joe said closing his eyes, seconds later he was snoring. Nicole looked down at him as she hung up her clothes.

"Joe!" She yelled smacking his foot. "Please get up and help me. I still have the whole kitchen to put away." Nicole whined as she walked out of the room. She walked down her new hallway to Rachel's room and opened the door.

"Oh ew!" Nicole yelled turning her head at the site she just witnessed. "You could lock the door Ray!"

"And you could fuckin' knock!" Billy yelled as he threw a pillow at the door as she quickly shut it. She shook her head trying to remove the image of what she had just seen. They had been at the apartment for four days and most of it was unpacked. Billy stayed clear of the apartment while Rachel's father helped with the move. Her father knew Rachel needed transportation for work, so he gave her his truck. Now Nicole didn't have to use her savings for a car. Nicole smiled as she looked around her oversized living room. They actually did it. They moved out on their own.

Twenty minutes went by when Billy walked out of Rachel's room. He was wearing only jeans. His tattoos shown making Nicole nervous. Even though he had been decent to Nicole the past week she still didn't want to look him in the eye. He walked past her to the frig and grabbed a beer. Something both him and Joe insisted they have at all times.

"Sorry Nic." Rachel's face was pink with embarrassment as she walked past Nicole. She walked into the kitchen and started emptying some boxes.

"Where's Joe?" Billy asked.

"Sleeping in my bed." Nicole said as she opened a box next to Rachel. Billy huffed and put his beer down. He walked to Nicole's room and pushed the door open. His brother was out cold. Billy smacked his foot hard making Joe jump.

"Get the fuck up and start puttin' some of this shit away." Billy yelled. "We gotta leave soon!" Joe slowly sat up. He rubbed his eyes, yawned then climbed off the bed and slowly walked into the living room.

For the next few hours with the help of Billy and Joe, the girls had their entire apartment unpacked. Billy and Joe had left and told the girls to meet them at the bar later on. Rachel jumped in the shower then got dressed when she remembered her work clothes at her fathers house.

"Nic, I have to run to my dad's. I forgot he washed my work clothes for me." She grabbed her coat and opened the door. "I'll be back later."

--

"Thank you so much dad." Rachel kissed her fathers cheek as he handed her a bag. "You really didn't have to do that."

"You've been busy with the apartment so it's ok." He laughed. "Just don't get used to it." Rachel could see how nicely he folded her work clothes through the bag. He really was a great man. She smiled at him as he put his arm around her shoulder.

"I'm so proud of you, you know that?' He smiled down at her. "I was really afraid of what would happen after you moved here. But your grades were above average, you listened to curfew and you really proved yourself. Now, my little girl lives on her own."

"Well, mom raised me right, and you weren't so bad yourself." They both laughed.

"You've been better." Her father sighed. "No more nightmares." Rachel had completely forgotten about them. She hadn't had them since that first night she slept at Billy's apartment.

"No more nightmares." She stood up from her seat and stretched. "I'm going to go get a couple of things from my room. Then I have to head out." Rachel's father watched as she walked down the hall and disappeared up the stairs. His smile faded and his heart sunk. He was proud of his daughter and happy that she was happy. But he missed her. When she moved to his home he thought she would be there awhile. Not move a few months later. He sighed to himself when he heard a loud knock at the front door. He walked down the hall to the door and opened it. A tall attractive woman in a black suit smiled at him. She took her sunglasses off.

"Good evening." She put her hand out for him to shake. "I'm Detective Wallace. And this," she nodded behind her "is Detective Aubrum." Rachel's father shook her hand giving her a slight smile. He looked behind her at the man she called Aubrum. He was tall and broad and very young looking. His stern jaw clenched making her father nervous.

"Is there something wrong?" He said his heart pounding.

"Is Rachel Hedlund your daughter?" His breathing stopped at the sound of her name. What could two detectives possibly want with his daughter?

"Yes," he said crossing his arms over his chest. "May I ask what you're here for?"

"Actually, we would like to speak with your daughter." Detective Wallace stood, her hands on her hips. Her father was about to protest when Rachel came barreling down the stairs talking about needing a box for the stuff she wanted to take. She stopped at the bottom of the stairs when she noticed the two people at the front door. She smiled walking closer to them.

"Are you Rachel Hedlund?" Detective Wallace asked.

"Yes. And you are?"

"I'm Detective Wallace." She nodded behind her again. "This is Detective Aubrum. We would like to ask you a few questions."

"Um…about what?" Rachel now had her arms crossed over her chest.

"Do you know a William Darley?" Rachel's eyes widened as her arms slowly fell to her sides. Her mouth opened slightly. She started losing her breath hearing his name from a detective's mouth.

"I…well…" she didn't know what to say. She could feel her father's eyes on her.

"Well you are in fact William, or as you call him Billy Darley's girlfriend?" Rachel's entire world crashed at that moment. She swallowed hard almost looking through the detective. Her hands became numb and she could feel the bile rising up her throat. She couldn't breathe feeling everything close in around her. She looked over to her father her eyes pleading with him. The shocked look on his face was enough to make her cry. She looked back to the detective clearing her throat.

"What is this about?" Rachel spat.

"It's about a triple homicide." Rachel's body began to shake. She needed to know what was happening without her father hearing. Detective Wallace knew she needed to talk to this girl and knew her father's presence wasn't going to make her job any easier. "Would you like to talk outside," she looked over to Rachel's father then back to Rachel "privately?" Rachel nodded her head walking past her father. She didn't look at him as she shut the door behind her. Rachel walked past the two detectives to the end of her walk way. Her arms were over her chest again. She turned facing them.

"Were you with Billy two weeks ago today?" Detective Aubrum asked. His voice was husky and deep. Rachel stared at him for a moment before slightly nodding her head.

"I was with him that entire weekend." She barely breathed out the words.

"His vehicle was seen at the crime seen on the night of the murders." Rachel's stomach was taming.

"Whoever seen his car was mistaken. He was with me the entire weekend."

"Could it have been someone else in his car?" Detective Wallace asked.

"No. Billy doesn't let anyone touch that car. It's his baby." Rachel's stomach tightened again remembering Joe driving Billy's car numerous times. No, not Joe. He couldn't have anything to do with this. "May I ask who was," Rachel took a deep breath. She could feel her hands shaking on her arms.

"The departed?" Detective Wallace asked. Rachel nodded her head as the detective pulled out a small notepad. She opened it sighing.

"The three deceased are, Dominic Russo, Steven Gallo and Ralph Moretti." The detective placed the notepad back in her pocket and eyed Rachel for any sign of a reaction. Rachel shook her head. She didn't know any of those names.

"Detective, I'm sorry that you wasted your time. But I promise you, Billy was with me. So whoever said they saw his car was mistaken."

"Sure." Detective Wallace smiled at Rachel. "If I may though," she took a step closer to Rachel. "I really think you should stay away from Billy. You seem intelligent. And I could see why he would want you by his side. But, he's no good. And I'm sure you aren't aware of his past, or even his present." Rachel's jaw clenched as she looked at the detective. She tried hard to hold back the tears that were threatening her eyes and the anger that was rising through her body.

"I'm sorry, but are we done here?" Rachel asked. Detective Wallace looked at her partner who nodded.

"We'll be in touch." Detective Wallace walked to her car and stopped. She turned back to Rachel walking over to her quickly. "If you have any information, please don't hesitate to call." She handed Rachel a business card. Rachel hesitated before taking it and placing it in her jean pocket. The two detectives got in their car and drove off.

"You think she was lying?" Aubrum said.

"No. She was with him. Which only means one of his boys did the deed." Wallace said shaking her head slightly.

"That girl is too beautiful to be with a thug like this." He said as he looked down at Billy's rap sheet. His mug shot was staring back at him. "Since when does he have a steady girl? Could it be our Billy Darley is growing soft?"

"Maybe." Wallace said. "Maybe she's exactly what we need to finally bring that son of a bitch down." Aubrum nodded his head in agreement to his partner's statement.

--

Rachel watched the detectives drive off before she took in a deep breath. She slowly turned facing her father's house. The truth was out. There was no getting out of this. She needed to tell him about Billy. She sighed as she walked back up the walkway. She opened the door and looked down at the floor. Her purse and bag of clothes were waiting for her. She looked up at her father who was standing at the entrance to the hall.

"Dad?" Rachel said taking a step closer. "Please let me explain."

"Explain?" He said through clenched teeth. "That was him wasn't it? The guy with the tattoos that was waiting for Adam, that was him right?" His voice rose.

"Dad,"

"Was it?" She was cut off by her father as his voice rose louder.

"Yes." She whispered.

"You date some crazy looking guy behind my back, and then detectives come talking to you about him murdering people." Rachel's eyes widened. "Yes, I heard the whole thing. The window was open." He pointed over to the front window.

"They were misinformed. It's fine now." Rachel knew it wasn't fine, but she needed her father to calm down.

"Get out!" He said calmly pointing to the door.

"What?"

"Get out of my house. I can't look at you right now." His voice was quivering. Rachel couldn't believe what she was hearing. She took another step closer to her father. "I said leave!" He yelled.

"You can't be serious."

"I need time to think. I trusted you, thinking you were doing the right thing." He squinted his eyes at Rachel as she picked her things up. "What would your mother say?" Rachel's head shot up at her father. How dare he bring her into this? She would have supported Rachel with any decision she made, good or bad. Rachel wasn't upset anymore. She was angry now.

"How the hell would you know anything she would say?" Rachel hissed through clenched teeth. Rachel turned away from her father and walked out the door. She got in her truck as her father slammed the front door. She drove off to her apartment with her head spinning and her stomach hurting.

--

Rachel opened the door to her apartment and quickly walked into her bedroom. She flung the bag across the room and walked back out. She called Nicole's name a couple of times before seeing the note on the kitchen table. She went to the bar early. Rachel huffed as she crumbled up the note and threw it in the garbage. She stormed out of the apartment slamming the door behind her.

Not many cars lined the parking lot at the Four Roses as she sped in. She turned the truck off and pulled the keys out of the ignition. Without much thought she climbed out of her truck and quickly walked across the parking lot. She pushed the door open making a few heads turn her way. She could see Billy playing pool with Joe and Bodie. Nicole was leaning against the wall watching. She walked to the back of the bar and straight up to Billy. He was bent over getting ready for his next shot.

"We have to talk." Rachel said.

"Not now."

"Yes now!"

"I'm fuckin' playing Ray, give me a minute."

"No." Billy shook his head as he took a deep breath. He continued aiming his shot. "Billy, I'm not playing with you." Rachel said. Nicole walked up to her placing her hand on her shoulder. Rachel pushed her off then grabbed the cue stick from Billy throwing it to the floor. Billy shot up.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Billy yelled.

"I said we have to talk," she stepped closer to him, her jaw tight with anger "now!"

"Are you fuckin' kiddin' me?" Billy bent down to grab the cue stick when Rachel pushed him. He lost his balance having to grab the side of the pool table. He rose up and grabbed Rachel by the arm dragging her to the door. He pushed it open then pulled her to the wall pushing her against it hard. His finger was in her face.

"Don't you ever fuckin' pull that shit again," His teeth clenched.

"Or what? You'll kill me too." She hissed. Billy's eyebrows narrowed. He pulled himself away from her grabbing a cigarette from his pocket.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Two detectives were just at my father's house." Billy froze his eyes wide. " Does Detective Wallace and Aurbum ring a bell?"

"What'd they want?" Billy lit his cigarette.

"To talk to me about three murders that happened two weeks ago today. And you're their number one suspect." Rachel spat. Billy huffed.

"I didn't do anything." He smirked.

"You think this is fucking funny?" She yelled. "Well here's a comical thing, my father heard the whole conversation and now knows about us." Billy's expression softened.

"What happened?" Billy asked.

"He told me to leave. My father told me to leave because of you." She pushed him aside and walked to her truck. Billy called her name but she didn't listen. She jumped into her truck and drove to her apartment. She felt horrible. She just wanted to take a shower and go to sleep.

She opened the door slowly, closing it just as slow. The pain of her fathers words were burning now. Her eyes swelled up with tears as she entered her bedroom. She got undressed and went in the shower. She felt as if she had been in there for hours by the time she finally shut the water. She got dressed in tank top and pajama shorts and slipped into her bed. She was crying the entire time she showered and was now not able to breath threw her nose. She sighed and closed her eyes when she heard someone come in the apartment. She figured it was Nicole and kept her eyes closed until she heard the heavy footsteps rush in her room. Her eyes shot open as Billy stood next to her bed. She sat up; suddenly she wasn't feeling very comfortable around him.

"How the hell did you get in here?" She said softly as she pulled the covers up higher. Billy pulled out a set of keys from his pocket and dangled it from his middle finger. His eyes were cold as they glared back at her. She sighed recognizing the keys. Nicole probably didn't hesitate giving them to him.

"You're gonna blame me for your father?" His voice was deep and unrecognizable. She didn't know what to say. She didn't want him there. Knowing there was a chance he could have done what those detectives said made her nauseous. "_You_ chose this life with me. How the fuck is this my fault?" He took a step closer to her. She didn't look at him as she rose from the bed and tried to walk past him. He grabbed her arm pulling her back up against his chest. She held her breath and closed her eyes. His touch sent shivers through her body. And not the wonderful ones that made her want to kiss him.

"You have to leave." She said here eyes still closed. She could feel his grip tighten, her face showing her pain. He pulled her closer to him, his mouth close to her ear.

"I'm not fuckin' goin' anywhere!" He hissed through his teeth. "You hear me?" Rachel tried to pull from his grip but he was too strong. She snapped her head towards him, their eyes meeting in two cold stares. His jaw was tight as he leaned closer to her. She tried to pull from his grip again but it was no use.

"Get off of me," she hissed as she started pushing him. "Get the hell off of me you murdering piece of shit!" she couldn't help but yell the words. Billy's eyes grew wide as his lips tightened. His fingers dug in her arm making her wince.

"What the fuck did you say?" He pulled Rachel's face closer to his. She could smell the whiskey on his breath, making her stomach turn. She had never felt this way about him before. She didn't want to be this close to him, didn't want to breath in his smell or feel his touch.

"Don't look so pissed. I didn't say anything that wasn't true."

"You really fuckin' think I killed those people? I don't even fuckin' know who they are!" Billy hissed through clenched teeth.

"Why would they come to _my_ father's house? Why would they tell me they have witnesses that seen your car at the crime scene?" She was yelling and trying desperately to free herself from his grip. She was fighting him now, hitting him with her free hand. He let out a grunt as he grabbed her flying arm.

"Relax!" He yelled. He grabbed both of her arms, pushing her down on the bed. She was still trying to break free from him when he pinned her down.

"Let me go!" She yelled, her teeth now clenched.

"Not until you calm down."

"No! I won't calm down until you tell me the truth!"

"How can I fuckin' kill someone if I was with you?" Rachel just looked at him. She was in fact with him the night his car was seen. She had been at his place that whole weekend. Rachel's body finally relaxed. Billy could feel her muscles loosen as he stared back at her. "Those detectives have it out for us. They're just trying to scare you." His voice was calm. His grip was still tight on her. He wasn't sure if she was going to lash out at him again. Her eyes softened as she looked up at him.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. "I'm just really upset about everything that happened today." Her eyes watered. A tear slid out the corner of her eye. Billy leaned down, kissing her softly on the lips.

"Are you calm now?" He said still touching her lips. She nodded her head and smiled awkwardly. The image of Joe in Billy's car popped in her head.

"What about your brother?" Billy growled and pulled away from her. He climbed to his feet and took his coat off.

"What about him?" Billy sighed.

"Maybe he had your car that night." Billy's head shot in her direction.

"What the fuck are you tryin' to say?" Rachel could see how angry he was getting. She didn't want to accuse Joe of anything. She didn't think he was capable of hurting anyone like that. Rachel shook her head and smiled.

"Nothing. Nevermind." She didn't want to fight with him. She didn't want the cold stares he gave or feel the uncomfortable silence he knew so well how to provide. The feeling of wanting him to leave was over. He must have sensed it as she watched him take his boots off. He yawned loud and took his clothes off. She laughed at herself how quickly her feelings for him flipped. He walked to her bed and climbed in.

"You have to learn to trust me." Billy whispered as he leaned back on her head board. He lit a cigarette from the pack in his hand. He inhaled deeply letting the smoke slowly escape his lips.

"I _do_ trust you." She replied. He raised an eyebrow as he looked over to her. "I just," she crawled over to him and laid her head on his chest. Closing her eyes she listened to his heart beat and sighed. "I don't know what I was thinking. I'm sorry." Billy put the cigarette to his lips. Taking a quick drag he put it out in the ashtray. He stared across the room as he held the girl he loved. He thought of that night. Creeping out of bed and making his way to his car unnoticed by Rachel was harder then actually killing Ralphie and his two goons. Sneaking in Bones' shop to shower and change was another task. He made it through unnoticed and slipped back into his apartment and back into bed with Rachel. She hadn't even change positions while he was gone.

He looked down at her now, his hand brushing across her cheek. If she knew what he did she would never forgive him. She would leave him and he couldn't have that. He wouldn't have that. He pushed himself down and put his arms around her. Her breathing had become steady and low as she slipped into a comfortable sleep. Billy closed his eyes following her in slumber.

--

"Thank you very much sir. I hope you had a great time." Nicole said handing their last host his change. He paid cash for a party that lasted seven hours. They were a wealthy family Nicole could tell. The wife was tan, fit and shiny. Her hair was different shades of caramels and blondes. Her nails were done in permanent French and were too long for her hands. She wore expensive clothing and her new boobs were being pushed through her top. The husband gave the girls a hefty tip and eyed them as he walked away. He winked at them before he entered his car.

"Yeah, like he has a chance." Rachel mumbled. Nicole laughed as she helped her finish clean up the outside tables. Rachel's expression changed as her mind kept going back to what the detectives had told her a few days before. She believed Billy, that wasn't the issue anymore, but the thought of people being killed and Detectives coming to _her_ father's house wasn't sitting well with her. Her father was another obstacle she couldn't get over. She knew he needed time to get over the fact that she lied to him but it was still hurting.

"Why the long face?" Nicole asked as she finished closing the garbage bags. She hadn't told Nicole about the detectives or how her father wasn't speaking to her, but she felt she needed to now.

"My father isn't speaking to me."

"_Your_ father?" Nicole replied. She raised her eyebrows at Rachel. Nicole had known Rachel and her father since they were kids and no matter what Rachel had ever done her father never got mad at her. What could have happened to make him turn his back to her?

"He knows about Billy." Rachel said. Nicole had just turned around to put a new bag in the garbage can when she turned back around quickly.

"Oh my God!" Nicole grabbed her arm. "How did he find out? What did he say?"

"Two detectives came to his house when I went to pick up my work clothes."

"What'd they want?"

"They said Billy may have been involved in a murder." Nicole's eyes widened. She got a stabbing pain in her stomach. "Some guy named Ralph somebody, a Steven somebody and I think a Dominic somebody." Nicole recognized all three names but knew it could be a coincident.

"Do you know any of the last names?" Nicole asked as she put her jacket on.

"Um…I think one was Moralli…no Morelli." Rachel scrunched her face in thought. "No! Moretti, that's it. Ralph Moretti." Nicole almost threw up at the sound of his name. She knew something had happened. She could feel it in her bones.

"None of those names sound familiar." Nicole said trying not to show the shock she felt. "What did Billy say?"

"He told me he had no idea what they were talking about."

"Do you believe him?"

"I didn't at first, but now I do. But my dad heard the entire conversation I had with the detectives."

"Now what?"

"I don't know. I tried calling my father everyday and he just ignores me." Rachel put her coat on as they walked to Rachel's truck. "I think I'm just going to let some time go by, and then try again."

"That would be a good idea. Give him some time. He'll forgive you." Rachel smiled at Nicole as she pulled away. Nicole looked over at Rachel nervously.

"Can you drop me at Joe's?"

"Ok." They drove the rest of the way in silence. She pulled up to the apartment building and stopped. "Do you want me to wait for you?"

"No." Nicole replied a bit too quickly. She smiled at Rachel. "No I think I'm going to stay for awhile."

"Ok. I won't see Billy until tonight, so I guess I'll see you later." Nicole climbed out of the truck and walked quickly into the building. Rachel knew something was up with Nicole, but decided it must be something between her and Joe.

Nicole ran up the stairs as fast as she could to Joe's floor. When she reached the door to the hallway she thought she was going to pass out. She walked quickly down the hallway to his apartment. She knocked hard. She knew Billy was out for the day and Joe would be home by himself. She knocked impatiently, sighing. Joe opened the door a smile spreading across his face as he looked at Nicole.

"You fucking killed Ralphie?" Nicole yelled. Joe's eyes widened. He looked out into the hallway to see if anyone was with her then grabbed her by the back of the neck pulling her into the apartment slamming the door behind them.


	15. Chapter 15

Rachel's heart fluttered as she watched Billy walk to the bed

Rachel's heart fluttered as she looked at Billy. He had just showered and was taking clothes out to get dressed when he felt Rachel's eyes on him. He turned to her letting her get an eye full of his naked body. He knew he was worth the stare. She bit her bottom lip her eyes sweeping across every inch of him. He watched her as long as he could before he almost burst. Rachel could see the seriousness in his eyes as he walked in two quick strides to the bed. He climbed on top of her, his mouth hitting hers as his naked body completely covered her. She kissed him aggressively as he pulled her shirt over her head. He was grunting as he tried to unbutton her jeans.

"I'm gonna fuckin' rip these off in a minute." Billy yelled tugging at her jeans. Rachel laughed making Billy more irritated. She grabbed his face kissing him. He growled threw the kiss pulling roughly at her jeans. She was now the one becoming impatient, helping him pull them off. Billy flung the jeans across the room seconds before entering her. This was not a love making session or even a moment of lust. Billy wanted one thing and one thing only. Rachel enjoyed when Billy got this way. This was the only time Rachel accepted his demanding ways. Just moments later they were both done and breathing heavily.

"Ok, I really need to go home." Rachel rose from the bed walking across the room. She bent to grab her jeans.

"You better leave now," He grabbed a cigarette from his pack and lit it as he eyed her. "Or you're not leaving at all." He smirked at her. Rachel dressed quickly knowing he wasn't kidding. She walked over to Billy kissing him deeply. He sighed when she pulled away.

"I'll call you when I get home." She said. Billy got up and started to dress.

"Wait for me. I'll walk you to your truck." He finished getting dressed and walked out of the apartment with her. It was a warmer night so he left his coat at home. He put his arm around her shoulder as they walked into the parking lot. They hadn't argued all day which would be a record for them lately. Rachel put her arm around his waist pulling him closer to her. She could see a smirk across his lips as she did this.

"Go straight home." He kissed her before walking to his car.

"Yeah, I love you too." Rachel said climbing into her truck. Billy opened his car door then turned to her.

"You know I love you. I don't have to tell you every God damn minute." Rachel smiled at him. He shook his head and climbed into his car. He waited for Rachel to pull out of the parking lot before he started his car.

Rachel was quietly singing along to the radio when her gas light went on. She looked down and sighed. She hated getting gas especially this late at night. The only gas station that was still open was the one not far from The Four Roses. It was in a shit neighborhood but she knew she wouldn't make it to the gas station in the morning before work. She pulled into the run down parking lot stopping in front of the first pump. She shut the engine then made her way into the small convenient store and smiled at the attendant. He recognized who she was and smiled nervously at her.

"What can I help you with miss?" He looked like he could be an attractive man underneath all the grease and dirt from his day at work.

"I just need 20 regular on pump," Rachel looked out the window at her truck, "one."

"Pump one is broken. You're on pump two." He smiled.

"Pump two it is then." Rachel laughed. The bell on the door rang making Rachel look behind her. Three men walked in and headed to the back straight to where the beer was. One of them looked over at Rachel eying her up and down. His smirk made Rachel nervous. She looked back at the greasy man who also looked nervous. He waited until the men's backs were turned when he leaned closer to Rachel.

"You better get out of here as fast as you can darlin'. Those men aren't the type for a pretty girl like you to be alone around." He whispered. Rachel heart began to pound. She nodded her head slightly then looked over her shoulder. The same man that was eying her before was looking at her again. He was very attractive and tall. His lean muscular frame was showing through his fitted black shirt. He had a lot of long dark messy hair on top of his head. She could see the hoop nose ring from where she stood. _What's with everyone in this neighborhood having tattoos_? Rachel thought to herself as she looked at his tattooed covered arms. His sinister stare gave her chills. She turned quickly thanking the attendant. She walked to her truck and started pumping the gas. She kept her eyes on the door to the store as she finished. She sighed with relief when she was done. She put the nozzle on the hook and turned back around slamming hard against the chest of one of the men the attendant had warned her about. It was the same guy that had been staring at her in the store. She swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat, trying to steady her breathing.

"You shouldn't be out here alone at night," the man said smirking. "Bad things happen to pretty girls like you at night." He took a step closer to her.

"I…I was just leaving." She stepped to the right still looking at him as she reached for the handle on the door. As soon as she turned to open the door a hand wrapped around her mouth and an arm around her arms and waist, she lost her breath as she was pulled across the parking lot. She kicked her legs and tried to move her arms but he was too strong. He laughed in her hear whispering for her to stop fighting him. He pulled her to the side of the building pushing her against the wall. Her face scraped the wall and her arms pulled behind her. He pressed himself against her back.

"Don't fight me," he whispered. "This will be over much faster if you don't fight me." Rachel's eye stung with tears knowing what he was going to do. Her head spun and her cheek hurt every time he moved her. She could feel him put his arm around her waist, his hand reaching down to the button on her jeans.

"Please don't do this." She whispered as she started to cry. She could hear two other voices laughing behind him.

"Where's her fuckin' wallet?" One said.

"I don't give a shit." Her attacker said. He moved her hair away from her face pulling it to his nose. He smelt her hair and smiled. "I don't want her wallet."

"Let's check her fuckin' truck." She heard another voice say. She heard them walk away leaving her alone with her attacker. He put his face close to hers. His lips touched her ear.

"You'll enjoy this. Trust me." His voice sent shivers down her body. She couldn't believe what was about to happen. She had to try to stop this. She started to cry again.

"Please…I'll give you anything you want…just…please don't do this!" She begged. He lightly kissed her cheek.

"I have what I want right here." He said reaching up and cupping her breast. She started to shake as she tried to get out of his grip. He pushed her closer into the wall, her cheek scraping again sending hot pain through her face. She screamed making him pull her arms further behind her back.

"You fuckin' scream again and I'll kill you!" he hissed in her ear. She didn't know what to do. She knew this man was serious and she didn't want to be killed. But she didn't want to be raped either. She was pulled from the wall and dragged further back behind the building. There was a large wooden table ahead of her. The man must have known it was there for there was no hesitation in his walk. He pushed her on top of the table spinning her around and slamming her onto her back. He threw himself on top of her quickly undoing his own jeans with one hand while he held her wrists over her head with his other. His face was inches from hers, his eyes looking into hers. The tears were flowing from her eyes as she tried to wiggle herself out from under him. She could barely move as he pushed his lips against hers. She tightened her lips trying desperately not to let his tongue in. Everything on this man was too strong for her. He broke the seal her lips had formed letting his tongue crash inside of her mouth. She squeezed her eyes shut. She knew she was no match for him, she couldn't free herself. She moved her head to the side just to have it pushed back to his.

"Don't do this." She begged while his mouth was on hers. He leaned back smiling at her. She broke one arm free and pulled at his hair trying to get him off of her. He just laughed at her grabbing both of her arms again over her head.

"I love when bitches fight me. It's such a turn on." He said with a sinister smile.

--

Back at Rachel's truck the two men went through everything, cursing at coming up empty. She had no purse in her truck. Not even lose change. The taller of the two men found her wallet and started to go through it.

"This fuckin' girl doesn't even have a fuckin' credit card." He pulled out some money that was stuffed inside her wallet. "Thirty fuckin' dollars, that's what we get while Syn get's to fuck the girl." The other guy laughed. The taller one started looking through pictures she had in her wallet when his cigarette almost dropped from his mouth. He pulled the picture he was looking at out of the wallet and held it up. It was the girl Syn was with and a bald headed guy. She had a big smile while he looked serious. "Fuck!" He yelled.

"What's your fuckin' problem?" the other guy said.

"I fuckin' knew she looked familiar." He yelled.

"Who?"

"The bitch Syn has right now." He looked at his friend turning the picture to face him. "It's Billy Darley's girl." The other guy's eyes opened wide.

"We're so fuckin' dead."

--

"Don't tell me this don't feel good." Rachel's attacker said as she felt his hand between her legs. He hadn't gotten her jeans off yet, he was having too much fun toying with her. His hands had touched her everywhere making her nauseous. She hadn't given up fighting, trying everything to not let him hurt her. She tried screaming again but he silenced her with his hand.

"I told you not to fuckin' scream!" He hissed through clenched teeth in her ear. "I'll let it go this time. You do it again, your gonna bleed." Now she could feel his hand at her jean button. He pulled it open unzipping it with one hand. He didn't have the same trouble Billy did earlier as he got her jeans past her thighs in one pull. He kicked her jeans further down until they hit the floor, her sneakers going with them. He was rough and experienced at what he was doing. She started to cry begging him to stop. He just smiled at her reassuring her it would be over soon. He pushed her legs open and pulled her panties to the side and was just about to do what he intended from the second he saw her when the two men came back.

"We gotta fuckin' go!" One of them yelled. Her attacker growled and stopped what he was doing. He looked behind him.

"What the fuck' are you talkin' about?" He yelled his face twisted with anger. This was the first time Rachel had seen him angry since he grabbed her and he was as scary as Billy.

"The girl," he hesitated. "She's Darley's girl." She could feel her attacker's body tense as he slowly looked down at her. His eyes were wide as he looked her over. He pulled himself off of her fixing his jeans. He ran his fingers through his hair nervously.

"Go to the fuckin' car." He ordered the other two. Rachel was frozen looking over at him. He stared back at her, anger rising in his face again. He walked over to her and grabbed her hair pulling her up to his face. "You say anything to your piece of shit boyfriend about this and I will not hesitate to come get you." His mouth only inches from hers. "And I _will_ finish what I started." His grip on her hair loosened as he pushed her back down and walked quickly away from her. When he was no longer in view she climbed off the table and reached for her jeans pulling them up with shaking hands. She searched for her sneakers through tears that she couldn't control. She grabbed them both and without putting them on she walked slowly to the corner of the building. She didn't want to bump into them again. She crept the side of the building and looked out into the parking lot. Her truck was the only thing left. She ran to her truck closing the doors that were left open. She jumped in and sped off.

--

"Would you keep your fuckin' mouth shut Nicole?" Joe yelled as she put his shirt on. "If my brother hears you I don't know what he'll do."

"He's not even here Joe." Nicole replied.

"And if he just happens to walk in and hear your ranting, then what?"

"Joe, I would never turn on you. I would die before I would turn on you." Nicole said lowing her voice. She stood up and grabbed Joe's face. Joe grabbed her arms pushing her away.

"Dammit Nicole. Stop this shit. There's nothing to tell you."

"I know you did it." Nicole smiled slightly. "I didn't want this to happen but the idea that you did it for me," Joe grabbed her arm pulling her to his face.

"Shut…the fuck…up!" Joe spat. "Nothing was done, especially not for you. If that prick you fucked is dead he must have pissed someone else off. I wouldn't waste my fuckin' time!"

"Then why did you freak last night when I told you."

"Because you're in the fuckin' hall yelling I killed someone. That's why!" Joe let her go and put his boots on. He opened his door and walked to the front door. Nicole followed him trying to ask him more questions. He turned to her giving her a hard stare.

"Not another word Nic. I'm warning you." Nicole knew he was serious and didn't want to push him. She wanted to know what happened and wanted to know if it was Joe who did it but pushing him would mean pushing Billy. Something she definitely didn't want to do. She followed Joe to the parking lot and back into Heco's car.

"Thanks for waiting for me man." Joe patted Heco's shoulder. "I really needed that shower."

"No dude, thank you! I didn't want to smell your skanky ass anymore." They all laughed except for Nicole as they drove back to the Four Roses. As they pulled into the parking lot Nicole looked over at the black truck that was sitting at the end by itself. Joe followed her gaze and squinted his eyes.

"Isn't that Rachel's truck?" he asked.

"Yeah." She said. Heco pulled his car up to the truck. They all knew Billy was at the bridge working tonight. Nicole knew that Rachel had work in the morning and wanted to go home to get some sleep. But here was her truck sitting in the dark corner of the parking lot.

"Is that her?" Heco asked looking at the driver's side window. Nicole got out of the car and walked to truck.

"Oh my God!" Nicole yelled trying to open the door. It was locked and she could see Rachel crying. "Open the door Ray!" Joe was standing next to her trying to pull the handle. Rachel looked up at them her eyes puffy and red. Her left cheek was all bloody and scraped.

"Ray! Open the damn door." Joe said. Rachel reached over and opened the lock. Joe grabbed the handle and pulled her door open. Joe, Nicole and Heco stared back at her. "Who the fuck did this?" Joe said as he grabbed her face. Rachel's crying was uncontrollable. "Rachel!" Joe yelled. Nicole moved his arm and grabbed her friend into a hug.

"Ray," she whispered "you can tell us who did this. What happened to you?" Nicole prayed that Billy wasn't the one who hurt her.

"I…don't…" Rachel couldn't breath. Heco took a step back pulling his phone from his pocket. He dialed Billy's number and put the phone to his ear.

"Billy, we got a problem."

--

Nicole had finally gotten Rachel to calm down enough to tell her what happened. Joe and Heco stood a few feet away letting the girls talk. She didn't know their names and had only seen her attackers face. Rachel stomach turned as she replayed the event to Nicole. Joe and Heco still didn't know what happened. The only thing they knew was when Billy got there he was going to lose it. Screeching tires and a loud rumbling could be heard from up the block. Rachel held her breath knowing it was Billy. She looked over at Joe and Heco.

"Oh God, please tell me you didn't call him." Heco shrugged his shoulders. Rachel got up to walk back to her truck when Billy flew into the parking lot. He stopped short in front of them. He didn't shut the car off as he jumped out and ran over to Rachel. He grabbed her shoulders making her look at him. His eyes widened and his jaw clenched as his eyes fell on the bloody mess on her cheek. He grabbed her face pulling her wound closer to him.

"Who the fuck did this to you?" He hissed through clenched teeth. She closed her eyes knowing she would have to tell him she was attacked.

"I don't know." She whispered. She couldn't tell him that they knew who he was, that they said his name. She was too afraid of what would come of it.

"What the fuck do you mean you don't know?" He yelled so loud even Joe jumped. Rachel started to cry again as she looked back at an overly angry Billy.

"I didn't see who he was." Billy grabbed Rachel's arm and pulled her to his car. He opened the passengers' side and put her in. "Take her truck back to our place." He demanded Joe. Billy looked over to Heco before he got in the car. "I'll call you in a few." Heco nodded his head. They watched Billy drive recklessly out of the parking lot. His face was red, and would get worse as he punched the steering wheel every time she would cry out loud.

"Where did this happen?" He yelled.

"At the gas station on Vander." Rachel cried. Billy hit the steering wheel with such force the car moved off of the road. Billy gained control then looked over at Rachel.

"Didn't I fuckin' tell you to go straight home?" He was screaming at her, spit fly from his mouth. Rachel put her face in her hands and sobbed uncontrollably. They pulled in front of the apartment building, Billy stopping short. He jumped out of the car and ran around to her side. He opened the door and pulled her out.

"I'm sorry," Rachel's eyes were swollen and red from crying. His hard expression softened seeing her this way. He grabbed her into a hug. Rachel pulled him tighter to her. "I'm sorry." She whispered. Billy walked her to his apartment. Her arms still wrapped around his waist. He was walking her to his bedroom when she stopped.

"I have to shower." She said quickly. His eye narrowed.

"What else happened?" Rachel shook her head as tears fell down her cheeks. He put his hands on her face, his own face only inches from her. "Tell me now," he hesitated before asking the next question. "Were you," he closed his eyes and sighed. He couldn't finish the sentence.

"No." She whispered. "But he tried." Billy fell back against the wall. He put his hands on his knees and bent forward. He was having trouble breathing. Rachel could see it for the first time; he was having an anxiety attack.

--

"That bitch fuckin' wanted it," Syn said as he watched the girl on the stage take her top off. "Next time I'll finish what I started." The girl moved closer to him knowing he was a well paying customer. She bent down as his eyes watched her and his mouth smirked. The guy next to him was shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

"He's gonna find out." Syn snapped his head over to the guy giving him a cold stare. "Darley's gonna kill us all." He whispered. The half naked girl was now off stage and grinding on Syn's lap listening to then loud and clear. She made believe she could care less as her ears were wide open.

"She isn't going to tell the asshole. And even if she does, she doesn't know who I am."

"But what if she does, or what if he catches on?"

"How the fuck is he gonna catch on?"

"It's his fuckin' girl man. He'll know something happened to her." Syn smiled and looked at the girls' back that was on him. He placed his hand on her thigh making her smile.

"Don't stress out." He told him as he grabbed the girls' inner thigh. She looked back at him and licked her lips.

"You ready for your private dance sweet heart?" He nodded his head. She climbed off of him and led him to the back room.

--

"Yeah?" Spink said into his phone. He listened carefully to the person on the other end. His eyes widened as he snapped his fingers at Bodie. Bodie stopped his game, placing the cue stick on the pool table.

"Thanks Allie, you did good." Spink slammed his phone shut. "Have you talked to Billy?" Spink asked Bodie.

"About an hour ago, why?" He asked crossing his arms over his chest.

"My cousin called me from work. Syn, as you know is a valued customer of hers. She said him and one of his boys were talking about Billy, and about something happening to his girl." Bodie picked his phone up and dialed Billy.

--

"What?" Billy yelled through the phone. "Fuckin' "B" Street did this?" Bodie told Billy the details Spink had told him. "Syn's dead. He's fuckin' dead!" Billy slammed the phone down. He placed a cigarette in his mouth and lit it. He needed to calm down for Rachel's sake. She had been attacked and almost raped and he wasn't there to protect her. He picked up the phone dialing Heco's number. He told him to gather the guys and head to the office. Joe sat down across from Billy at the kitchen table as he hung up his phone.

"What're we gonna do?" Joe asked. Billy leaned forward his eye noticeably blood shot.

"Where going to kill Syn and those two douche bags he makes tag a long with him."

"You know if Syn gets touched we're going to have problems with Bones."

"Look at me Joe. Tell me if I look like someone that gives a fuckin' shit!" Joe sighed knowing this whole situation wasn't going to end well. "Get your girl and have her stay in my room with Rachel. We got some heads to crack." Joe went to get Nicole telling her they needed to do a few things. She knew what they were going to do and hoped they succeeded. Her best friend was hurt, humiliated and scared out of her mind. She wanted them to pay. When Nicole went into Billy's room she could see Rachel curled up in a ball. Billy had given her a Xanax hoping it would help her sleep. She passed out not even an hour later. Nicole climbed into Billy's bed next to her friend and closed her eyes.

--

"What the fuck we gonna do Billy?" Spink asked. "Cause I'm ready." Billy stood tall his arms across his chest as he stared down at his men. They were all there, ready to fight for him, ready to start a war if needed. Bodie stood next to Billy knowing he was too angry to speak.

"Rachel told Billy that there were two other men with the guy that attacked her, who we know is Syn and his two fairies Donnie and Connor. Syn is too hard to touch, we all know that. But we think sending a clear message to Syn through Donnie and Connor might be enough...for now." All the guys nodded their heads getting ready for what was to happen next.

"Spink, you'll take your van and pack the boys in the back." Billy spoke his voice cracking. "Bodie and Joe will go with me." Spink nodded as Billy gave them the ok to start rolling.

Billy went out back and pulled the car cover off the old 1985 IROC-Z Camaro and climbed in. Joe climbed in the back and Bodie slipped into the front. The red car flew past the office sending leaves flying around. Billy knew exactly where to go. He knew where Syn's boys were. Spink's cousin informed them that Syn had left but Donnie and Connor stayed behind. They pulled up the block to the bar and waited for them to leave.

A couple of hours went by when Syn's two men finally decided to leave. They were high and drunk and not up for a fight. Billy had decided there was no fighting tonight. There was just showing Syn not to fuck with him. He smacked Bodie who had fallen asleep making him jump. Bodie looked over at Billy then followed Billy's nod to the two falling figures outside of the bar.

"We ready dog?" Bodie said fully awake. Billy nodded his head as Bodie grabbed his phone. He called the boys and told them to get ready. Billy climbed out of the car. His fitted black T-shirt and black jeans made him almost fade in the scenery. He kissed the cross around his neck then grabbed his gun from behind his back. He was going to end their lives while his boys made sure nothing happened to him. Billy walked in quick strides to the two men he wanted dead. They didn't hear him as he crept behind them. Billy stopped within a couple of feet from them and raised his gun. Billy whistled loud making them both turn to face him.

"Fuck! I told you Donnie, I fucking told you!" Connor yelled as he turned and ran. Donnie stood looking back at Billy. A smirk spread across his lips. He raised his arms slightly. Bodie and Heco ran past them chasing after Connor.

"What's the problem Billy boy?" Billy took a few steps closer, the barrel of the gun at Donnie's forehead. "Your girl go and tell on us?" He laughed. Billy's jaw clenched, his eyes widened but he kept his hand steady. "Did she also tell you that she loved every second of it? I heard her myself. You know how Syn works. He gets all the ladies beggin' for more." Donnie laughed again. "Man and does she look good naked." Billy's eyes glazed over as he tilted his head. _POP! POP! POP! _They heard the sound of Connor being taken care of. Donnie's face froze as the smirk spread across Billy's lips. _POP! _Billy pulled the trigger making a hole in the middle of Donnie's forehead.

--

"Nicole." Billy whispered as he pushed on her arm. "Wake up." Billy sighed trying to wake her again. Nicole's eyes shot open, she looked over at Rachel and sighed. "Nicole." Billy whispered again making her jump. "Go in Joe's room and go back to sleep." He ordered. She nodded her head and climbed out of bed. She was about to leave when Billy stopped her. "Thank you." He said. Nicole's eyebrows rose showing the shock she felt. She nodded her head and smiled. She shut the door behind her and headed to Joe's room.

Billy undressed and climbed into bed. He put his arms around Rachel and pulled her closer to him. He didn't get the man that hurt her, but for right now that would have to be good enough. Billy kissed her temple breathing in her scent. He had to protect her; he had to make sure no one touched her again. He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep, but the images of what happened to her plagued his mind.

--

Syn climbed out of bed cursing whoever was on the other side of his door. He looked back at the brunette that was naked in his bed and smiled. He grabbed his robe and headed towards his front door. He looked through the peep whole and sighed. _What the fuck does he want_? He thought. He opened the door and stared back at the man who woke him.

"What the fuck do you want?" Syn barked. The heavy man looking at him smiled before he reached in and grabbed the collar to Syn's robe. Syn's eyes widened at the man. He knew not to mess with him and he hadn't done anything to piss him off.

"I knew you liked the fight a girl gave when you fuck them, but I didn't know you grabbed random girls off the street." The man spat. Syn's eyes widened. "Yes asshole, if I know, Billy sure knows." He pushed his finger into Syn's chest. "I gave you strict orders, none of which involved you attacking Darley's girl. Now Donnie and Connor are dead and if you think it wasn't Darley's crew you're as stupid as you look." Syn's eyes widened again. He didn't know they were dead. Why hadn't anyone called him?

"What're you talking about?" Syn asked.

"You didn't hear?" The man let out a shrill laugh. "And you want to be leader someday? You just take some lessons from Billy. At least he knows how to run a crew. Get fuckin' dressed and get to work." The man turned on his heel and walked out the door. Syn slammed the door then walked to his room. He grabbed his cell off of his dresser and called his boy Trec.

"What's up?" Trec asked.

"Get a couple of your guys. I need someone taken care of."

--

It had been a week since Rachel was attacked and she hadn't been at work. She wouldn't leave Billy's apartment at all. Nicole had brought her clothes and worked her shifts for her at the Lodge. Billy hadn't been to the bar at all that week other then to make a few sales. Bodie was running things when Billy wasn't around.

"I think I want to go out today." Rachel said to Billy as he read the paper he took from his neighbor. He didn't look at her as he raised an eyebrow. He took a drag of his cigarette and blew it to the side. "Well?"

"Fine, you come out with me." Billy said still reading the paper.

"I have to pick up my check." Billy sighed and nodded his head.

"Go get dressed then." Rachel rose from the table and went into Billy's room. She dressed quickly. She knew it was her idea to stay in but she was becoming irritable. She slipped her sneakers on and went back into the kitchen. Billy was already waiting for her by the door. They left the apartment building, Rachel walking quickly to Billy's car. There hadn't been any retaliation for Syn's guys, but Billy knew it could come at any moment. He looked around seeing if anything seemed out of the norm. He climbed in his car and headed out.

The day went by quickly, Billy taking Rachel along for his daily sales. He took her to get her check and out to a diner for lunch. She had an uneasy feeling most of the day but shrugged it off. When they were headed back to the apartment Billy's cell phone rang.

"What?" Joe was on the other end bitching about not being able to get into the apartment. "You shouldn't fuckin' forget your keys then. You're lucky I'm on my way home." He hung up the phone and put it in his pocket. He reached over and grabbed Rachel's hand. She smiled at him and relaxed more in the seat.

When they pulled up to the apartment building Rachel could see Nicole and Joe talking to Mike and Daniella. She hadn't seen her in awhile and was happy she was there. Her and Mike had become closer taking up all of each other's time. Rachel jumped out of the car as soon as Billy stopped. Daniella smiled when she saw her and wrapped her arms around her in a tight hug.

"I missed you so much." Danielle said.

"I missed you too." Rachel hugged her friend tightly. They pulled apart and laughed. Rachel looked over to Mike and gave him a kiss on the cheek. He looked uncomfortable as he looked over at Billy. Billy just nodded his head at Mike, then at Daniella. The three girls talked as Billy and Joe started a conversation with Mike. Joe was the first to notice the black truck but it was too late. The passenger rolled down the window and pulled the gun out firing without warning. The girls screamed as shots rang out all around them. Billy grabbed Rachel pulling her to the floor under him. Mike did the same with Daniella. Joe crawled to Nicole placing himself on top of her. Bullet holes were forming everywhere around them. Billy wanted to get up and fire back but he knew it was impossible. Suddenly the noise stopped and they could hear screeching as the truck flew out of the parking lot. Billy rose to his feet first grabbing the gun from his back. He looked around but there was no one in sight. Joe got up checking Nicole as did Mike with Daniella. The girls were crying and hugging each other when Daniella screamed.

"Oh my God!" She pointed to floor next to Billy. Rachel looked down to see the pool of blood that had formed. She looked up at Billy who had a questionable look on his face.

"God Billy you've been shot!" Rachel yelled as she pulled Billy's coat off. His right side of his shirt was completely wet. Billy looked down seeing the blood drip from under his shirt. He hadn't felt the bullet hit him but he was feeling the pain now. He squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. He was suddenly feeling light headed as Rachel grabbed him pulling him to the wall of the building.

"Fuck." Billy said the pain now rising up into his arm.

"Jesus fuckin' Christ!" Joe yelled as he grabbed Billy. "Don't you fuckin' die on me Billy!" Billy's eyes started to roll in his head. He could hear Rachel screaming and Joe and Mike telling him to open his eyes. He opened them slowly and looked at Rachel. He was breathing heavy through his nose as Mike and Joe pulled him to his feet. He moaned loud as the pain began to take over. They put Billy in the back seat of his car with Rachel as they jumped in the front. Joe jumped in the passenger's seat and turned to face his brother begging him to keep his eyes open. Mike jumped in the driver's seat and started the engine. Joe told Nicole to call Bodie to pick them up and meet them at the hospital. Rachel had her hand on his wound pushing hard to try to stop the bleeding. She looked at him as she cried.

"Billy, please….please stay with me." She kissed his forehead as his eyes closed. "Joe!" Rachel screamed. "Oh my God Joe, I think he's passing out." Within minutes they pulled in front of the ER. Mike and Joe pulled Billy out of the car and carried him into the hospital. Rachel was behind them screaming for someone to help. A doctor and two nurses came over asking questions. One of the nurses ran to get a gurney.

"What happened?" the doctor asked picking Billy's shirt up. His stomach was soaked in blood. Rachel covered her mouth when she looked down.

"He was shot." Mike said. The nurse came back with the gurney helping Joe and Mike lay Billy on it. They started cutting his clothes off as they pulled him away and through the double doors. Rachel stood in the waiting room staring at the doors. She wasn't sure how long she was like that until Daniella pulled her turning her around. Daniella gasped as she looked at Rachel. She was covered in blood. Rachel looked down at her clothes then at her hands. Tears fell down her cheeks as her face remained emotionless. Everything felt in slow motion.

"Oh my God, I think she's in shock." Nicole said pulling on Joe's arm. Joe grabbed Rachel's arms making her look at him.

"Rachel!" Rachel just stared back at him. She looked around the waiting room and could see all of Billy's crew had arrived. They all looked at her with concern. She wanted to leave, to get out of there and never look back. She didn't want this life. She missed her father. Rachel pulled from Joe's grip and walked out the door. She stood outside staring into space when Bodie put his hand on her should.

"Ray." He whispered. She turned around and looked at him for some time before she broke down. He grabbed her into a hug, letting her cry into his chest.

"I can't do this anymore Bodie." She whispered. "This is just too much."

"The doctor is here." Joe yelled through the doors to them. Rachel pulled back and looked up at Bodie. Bodie's expression was sympathetic. He grabbed her arm and guided her back inside.

"Mr. Darley is stable. He was sent in for emergency surgery. It was more of a flesh wound that may have hit just the right place to make it bleed the way it did. We closed the wound but he has had some blood loss and I would like to keep him for observation." Everyone sighed with relief except for Rachel. She didn't know what to do or what to say. The doctor looked over at her.

"Miss, are you ok?" She looked at the doctor confused then looked down at her blood soaked clothes.

"This isn't my blood." She looked back up to the doctor. "It's Billy's."

--

Billy woke up a few hours later and was persistent on getting out of the hospital. Bodie and Heco made sure the doctors let him leave without calling the cops or making things more difficult. Joe had gone home earlier grabbing a change of clothes for him. Billy put his clothes on and walked out of the hospital. Rachel was outside leaning against Billy's car when they walked out of the hospital. His face was pale and he was holding his side. He looked at Rachel seeing her clothes and face were caked with dry blood.

"Why the fuck didn't you go home and change?" He barked.

"Why are you leaving the hospital?" She hissed.

"I don't want to fuckin' be here." He climbed in the passenger's seat as Rachel climbed in the back with Joe. Bodie jumped in the driver's seat and took off. He ordered the rest of the crew to go finish their work for the day. Bodie jumped in the driver's seat and took off. Bodie pulled in front of the apartment building. He helped him out of the car, Billy growling in pain with every movement. Rachel climbed out of the car looking over at Billy as Joe was now helping him to the stairs. Bodie lightly grabbed Rachel's arm.

"It'll be ok Ray. Just bare with him." Rachel just stared blankly at Bodie. She pulled away from him and walked up the stairs. She walked down the hall and threw the door Joe had left open for her. She stood at the doorway and looked over at Billy who was resting on the couch. He looked over at her and raised his eyebrows.

"Could you get me my pain killers?" He asked pointing to the kitchen table. Rachel closed the door and grabbed the pills. She poured him a glass of water and walked over to him. He shook his head.

"Get me a beer." He said waving the water away. Rachel turned around placing the water in the sink. She grabbed a beer out of the frig and handed it to him. He took the bottle of pills, popping four in his mouth and drank half the bottle of beer. He lit a cigarette and let it hang out of his mouth as he relaxed deeper into the couch. Rachel was standing over him, her face still with no emotion. She watched as he smoked his cigarette with his eyes closed making faces of pain every time he moved. She turned and sat at the kitchen table her eyes never leaving him as he eventually fell asleep.

A couple of hours had passed and Billy was still sleeping. She watched him the entire time. She wasn't sure if it was because she wanted to make sure he was ok or if it was because she couldn't move. She almost felt paralyzed in the chair. Billy's eyes opened lazily. He called out for Rachel several times before she finally answered. She stood up from the chair and walked over to him.

"Can you help me to the bathroom?" He asked through a cracking voice. She bent down and started to help him to his feet. He was so heavy; Rachel was having trouble getting him up. She wished Joe had stayed instead of listening to Billy about going to work. She finally got him to his feet his weight heavy on her as she helped him down the hall to the bathroom. When they were finished she helped him back to the couch. His weight was too much for her he slipped from her grip and fell onto the couch.

"Are you fuckin' stupid?" He yelled.

"It was an accident." She spat back at him. He looked her up and down making a disgusted face.

"Why the fuck haven't you taken a shower yet?" He pulled a cigarette lighting it.

"Because you sent everyone away and I'm the only one here to help you." She turned and sat back at the kitchen table.

"I don't want to look at my fuckin' blood. Go shower!" He ordered.

"I can't leave you out here alone Billy."

"I don't need a fuckin' babysitter Ray!" Billy yelled. She knew he was in pain but his attitude was becoming irritating.

"Well you do need someone with you at all times. You can hardly walk."

"Maybe if you weren't so fuckin' stupid to go to the fuckin' gas station after I told you to go straight home I wouldn't be in this fuckin' position." Billy spat.

"You're blaming me for what happened?" He raised his eyebrows at her. "So basically almost getting raped was my own fault, is that what you're saying?"

"You said it," Billy barked "not me!"

"I can't do this." Billy raised an eyebrow at her.

"Do what?" His annoyance was clear.

"Do this!" She looked over at him. "Us!" His eyes widened.

"What the fuck are you talkin' about?" His voice was deep and serious.

"This is too much Billy. I'm done. I can't do it anymore." She picked up the phone and dialed Joe's cell phone number. She walked away into Billy's room to talk. She told Joe he had to come home. He argued until Rachel said she was going to leave Billy by himself if he didn't come home. She walked back into the living room and looked down at an angry Billy.

"What're you doin?" He said through clenched teeth.

"I'm staying here until your brother gets home. Then I'm leaving." His jaw clenched and he tried to stand up. He howled in pain falling back onto the couch. "It's over Billy."

"You fuckin' think I'm gonna let you leave me?" He barked. Rachel shook her head.

"Right now there's nothing you can do." Joe walked through the front door. Billy looked over at him then back at Rachel. He looked like he would actually take the life from her. But at that moment she didn't care.

"You know what? Fuckin' leave! Who the fuck needs you anyway!" Billy yelled waving his arms at her. Rachel turned on her heel and walked out of the apartment. She didn't shed one tear as she headed to the parking lot to her truck. She had to do this. In a weeks time she was attacked and then shot at. Her father still wasn't speaking to her and for the first time since she knew Billy she didn't care if she ever saw him again.

--

"How are you feeling?" Nicole asked Billy as she sat next to him on the couch. All the boys were there keeping Billy company. He was able to walk around without help and his wound was healing nicely. Joe had taken care of Billy with Nicole's help over the past few days.

"I'm fine." Billy said through the cigarette smoke that was leaving his mouth. Nicole knew what Rachel had done and tried to talk to her. She wasn't in the mood for anyone lately. Nicole had spent most of her time at Joe's trying to avoid an argument with Rachel. Everyone figured just needed to time.

"That's good." Nicole said.

"How's your friend?" He asked raising an eyebrow at Nicole.

"In a horrible mood. She's been really bitchy lately. Like she's mad at the world." Nicole could see the anger rising in Billy's face. "But I know Rachel and she just needs to let her steam off, then she'll come around. Billy nodded his head.

They partied the best they could the rest of the night. A few girls that Heco's girl had brought were all over Billy, irritating him to no end. Nicole shooed them away telling them Rachel would kill them if she walked in and saw them, making Billy smile at the thought. It was about four in the morning when Nicole finally decided that she needed to go home. She had work in the afternoon and needed to get some real sleep. She cleaned up some of the mess then waited for Joe to drive her home.

"I'll see you tomorrow night. Well, tonight." Nicole laughed as she kissed Joe. He smiled back at her sleepily as she climbed out of the car. He waited for her to get into her apartment before he left. Nicole yawned as she made her way to her room. Rachel's door opened suddenly making Nicole scream. She looked back at Rachel who was fully dressed to go out. She looked down at the suitcase she was rolling behind her.

"What are you doing?" Nicole asked knowing _exactly_ what she was doing.

"I didn't think you were coming home tonight." Rachel sighed.

"Rachel," Nicole put her hands in front of her. "Think hard before you do anything foolish."

"Nicole, please get out of my way."

"Rachel, Billy is going to really lose it when he finds out."

"That'll be my problem. Don't worry about it." Rachel pushed past Nicole and headed to the front door.

"I have to worry about it because who do you think he's going to come to when he realizes your gone?" Rachel turned to her friend and sighed.

"If you didn't just walk in you wouldn't have known anything. Make believe you didn't walk in."

"Where the hell are you going?"

"To my mother." Nicole's mouth opened to say something but nothing came out as she watched Rachel leave.


	16. Chapter 16

Rachel's head was in her hands as she took deep breaths

Rachel's head was in her hands as she took deep breaths. The pain she felt from the hard plastic seat she had been sitting in the past thirty minutes was the only thing keeping her mind off of her reoccurring wave of nausea. As much as she hated to fly she knew this flight was needed. There was no question with her leaving. No hesitation as she packed her bags and made her decision. She didn't know how long she was going to be gone, but she knew she had to leave. She needed a break from the life that was corrupting who she was. The thought of losing who she was to a stranger was never a fear. Never something she thought could ever happen to her. But here she was, waiting for her friend to pick her up from the airport in LA running away from the stranger that she was losing herself to. She knew she loved him. Knew she wanted every inch of him. But at what cost? The cost of friends and family for a man she knew there was no real future with. How did she get to this? How did she let herself get so lost in him? She could feel her stomach turn and the stinging in her eyes begin again. She lifted her head taking in a few deep breaths as she looked around. Ashlynne had told her she would be late picking her up but Rachel was becoming impatient. She stood up and stretched her back. Suddenly someone grabbed her from behind throwing their arms around her chest. If she hadn't recognized the scent of Lucky Ashlynne's favorite perfume, she would have thought she was being attacked again. Instead she sucked in the beautiful fragrance of her missed friend and smiled. She turned to see the tear stained face of her closest friend.

"I missed you so much." Ashlynne said as she wrapped her arms around Rachel's neck. Rachel hugged her friend tightly. Her own tears falling down her cheeks. The two girls held each other in a long over due embrace. Rachel didn't want to let her friend go but also didn't want to be at the airport anymore. Rachel pulled away first wiping her tears from her face. Ashlynne did the same laughing at how ridiculous she must look. Ashlynne was the bubbly girl that you never messed with. She was the bitch of all their friends, but you loved her just the way she was. She was caring and determined and would knock you to the ground if you crossed her wrong. Her hair was still the same short blonde cut she had for years. Her blue eyes looked even lighter from them being bloodshot from crying.

"Let's get the hell out of here." Ashlynne grabbed Rachel's suitcase and headed for the doors. Rachel didn't hesitate as she followed her to the street. They drove back to Ashlynne's apartment listening to music and talking. She didn't bring up why Rachel was back, but Rachel knew she was thinking about it. Rachel had called Ashlynne when she made her decision to leave. Knowing she would always be there for her, Rachel didn't think twice about calling. Ashlynne told her to get her ass on a plane and stay with her until she knew what she wanted to do.

"Here we are." Ashlynne said as she pulled up to a gated community of small apartment buildings. Ashlynne's father owned a lot of hotels and never had to worry about money. He paid her bills as long as she kept herself in college.

"Wow, your dad really wants you to stay in school." Rachel said as she looked out the window. The oversized sign that stood tall on the freshly cut grass read 'The Abby'. Rachel was used to living comfortably but this was out of her league. They drove through the gates into a mini world of extravagance. She laughed as Ashlynne smiled and raised her eyebrows at her. The girls climbed out of the car after Ashlynne parked into her parking spot and headed to the main door. Pillars rose high along the entire front of the main building. Expensive shrubbery stood neat and tall along every wall. Rachel followed Ashlynne down the main lobby into an oversized elevator. When they reached the third floor the doors opened and Ashlynne made her way down the long lavish hallway. Rachel followed her looking at the expensive paintings that hung on the walls.

"Stupid key cards we have to use in this place." Ashlynne said as she swiped the card. Her door opened and they walked in. The apartment was just as nice as the rest of the building. She had only moved in a couple of months before explaining the rows of unopened boxes that lined her living room. "Don't mind the mess. I'm hardly ever here. I haven't really had time, or the desire to unpack." Rachel followed Ashlynne through the apartment to a door across from her bedroom.

"This is where you'll be staying," Ashlynne said as her smile faded to a more serious look "as long as you need to." Rachel smiled at her friend. She walked into the guest room and placed her suitcase on the bed. "Now, I'm starved and in need of a stiff drink."

--

Billy pressed his back against the pew, his arms crossing his chest as he looked up at the decaying angel that hung from the ceiling. He winced slightly at the pain in his side. He was in his sanctuary, the abandoned chapel that sat in the center of his "office". He clenched his jaw as she slowly closed his eyes. It had been a week since Rachel had ended their relationship. He had tried to stay strong, not letting this faze him. She would be back. She couldn't resist him. He knew she would come to her senses soon and beg for him to take her back. He just didn't know how much it would hurt in the mean time. This was a pain he wasn't used to. He knew pain and suffering; physical and mental, more then anyone else could handle and always knew how to block it out. He knew how to live with it and move on. He couldn't move on from this. Rachel was taking to long to come back to him. The burning in his stomach returned making him lean forward again. He growled deep in his throat as he thought about his next move. His eyes shot open and he rose to his feet. He grabbed his coat from the chair next to him and stormed out of the chapel.

--

Nicole's heart raced as the banging at the door grew louder. She stood in the middle of the living room hesitating on answering it. Her whole body shook knowing who was on the other side. If she didn't answer he would kick it down, which would infuriate him more. She slowly crept across the living room breathing slowly trying hard to hold back the tears that were threatening to flow. He pounded on the door again making Nicole gasp. She held her breath as she reached the door, unlocking it slowly. She quickly removed the expression of fear on her face as she opened the door. Billy was standing in his normal intimidating form as he glared down at Nicole.

"Where is she?" He barked. Nicole let the air she was holding out through her nose before she began to speak.

"I don't know. She was already gone when I woke up this morning." Her voice shook while she spoke. She wasn't doing the best job covering up for Rachel. Why did she have to walk in while she was leaving?

"You're fuckin' lying!" He took a step closer to her. Her body tightened up as his icy eyes peered down into hers. "Her fuckin' truck is parked outside."

"I don't know," Nicole couldn't control the shaking. The idea of being alone with him made her ill, but to actually be alone with him made her body feel like it was going to go into convulsions. "Maybe someone picked her up." Nicole's eyes widened at what she just said. Why of all things to say would she say that? The look on Billy's face shown his anger was at its brim. He pushed past Nicole and darted into the apartment. He made his way straight to Rachel's room. Nicole could hear his heavy footsteps walk around her room quickly. He came back into the hallway and then into Nicole's bedroom. He searched the entire apartment for Rachel. Billy stopped in the middle of the living room. He was breathing heavy almost to the point where Nicole thought he might past out. His hands were in tight fists at his sides. He was starting to sweat as he felt the room closing in on him. He ripped his coat of slamming in on the couch. Nicole jumped taking a few steps back. Billy looked up at Nicole and without another thought he quickly walked up to her.

"Where is she?" He said.

"I told you, she was gone before I woke up." Billy clenched his jaw as he slowly took steps closer to her. "Billy, please…I…" before she could finish her sentence Billy grabbed her arms digging his fingers into her flesh. He slammed her against the wall making her lose her breath. His face was only inches away from hers. His eyes hard and filled with anger.

"Where the fuck is she?" He yelled. Nicole's body shook under Billy's. She had never been so scared in her life. Was he going to hurt her? Would he hurt his brother's girlfriend? For Rachel he would probably kill anyone. Nicole's eyes swelled up with tears. "Tell me Nicole! Where the fuck is she?"

"I don't know." Nicole couldn't hold back the tears as the streamed down her face. Billy grabbed her face. She could feel his own hands shaking as he started to yell.

"I swear to fuckin' God you don't tell me where she is I will fuckin' kill you right here." Nicole began to sob as Billy reached behind his back making a face as the pain in his side came back. She knew what he was reaching for, making her cry more. She begged him to let her go as his grip on her tightened.

"She left." Nicole was barely able to breathe the words.

"What?" Billy yelled as his face twisted in anger.

"She left Boston." Billy's face fell at her words. He pulled himself back, his hand now on Nicole's shoulder. His eyes glazed over as he studied Nicole's face.

"What the fuck you mean she left Boston?"

"I caught her sneaking out early this morning." Nicole said trying to calm down. "She went back home. Back to LA." Billy's eyes widened. He let go of Nicole dropping his hands to his sides. Nicole looked down seeing the gun in his hand. She slowly slid down the wall crying. Billy looked around in confusion. He was having trouble breathing and knew he needed to get out of there. He looked down at Nicole as she hugged herself. She sounded like a helpless child. He turned and grabbed his coat. He placed the gun back in his waistband and left the apartment.

--

"So, are we ever going to talk about this?" Ashlynne handed Rachel a cold beer from her frig. She had been pressing the issue of Billy for the past couple of days but Rachel wouldn't budge. The look on Ashlynne's face showed Rachel she wasn't going to leave well enough alone.

"What do you want to talk about?" Rachel asked.

"You know what I want to talk about. I want to talk about this Billy character."

"What do you want to know?" Ashlynne raised her eyebrows at Rachel. She knew she was trying to get her to stop talking about it, which just made Ashlynne want to talk more.

"I know a few things that I caught in between your sobs on the phone, like he's a gang leader. How the hell did you get yourself involved with that?" Ashlynne smirked.

"He just…I don't know. He's incredibly attractive." Rachel said almost to herself.

"So he's a hot gang leader? Only you Ray." Ashlynne took a swig of her beer.

"I felt safe when I was with him. But after what I what happened to me and then what I witnessed, how can I ever feel safe around him again?"

"Now if I got this right, you were attacked, he freaked out and gave some pay back which resulted in him getting shot?" Ashlynne questioned as she got herself another beer.

"That was the last straw Ash. All that blood, knowing it was his." Rachel's eyes started to water when she snapped the shut. She shook her head lightly trying to erase the image out of her head. She thought Billy was dead and that she had witnessed him die. She knew then that she couldn't live like this anymore. Ashlynne could see her friend's pain and quickly changed the subject.

"Let's go out."

"What?" Rachel's eyes shot open. She looked at her friend. Ashlynne's smirk grew into a smile.

"They're having a midnight beach party tonight, like we used to have on the weekends."

"Who's we?"

"We would include most of our old "friends" that you haven't seen in months." Ashlynne quoted the word friends with her fingers rolling her eyes as she got out of her seat and grabbed her cell phone. She opened it and dialed. "Hey Eric…yeah we'll be there…she will too…ok see you in a few hours." Ashlynne put her phone back and sat down.

"I actually really can use some familiar faces." Rachel smiled as she thought about how her night was going to be.

--

The cab pulled in front of Huntington Beach a little after twelve. Rachel was enjoying the warm weather again, wearing a pair of dark jean shorts, a white tank top and flip flops. Ashlynne's wardrobe was a bit more revealing. She sported a jean mini skirt with a maroon halter top. Ashlynne always liked the eyes on her, and from how she was acting tonight, she still did. They walked up the entrance of the beach and headed towards the barn fire. Rachel could see dozens of people laughing and dancing. Some faces she could make out and some were new to her. She could see some of the partiers looking her way.

"Here we go." Ashlynne whispered to Rachel. She knew how most of these people were. Partiers that truly only cared about themselves and also loved to be in the middle of anything new. Rachel had been away from LA for a few months and was mysteriously back. They were all going to be at her side tonight asking questions. She just prayed that Ash didn't bring up Billy.

"Rachel?" A girl yelled from the other side of the barn fire. Rachel could make out the girl as she came running around the fire. Gena Harper. Friends since kindergarten and probably one of the only true loyals from this group. Gena pulled Rachel into a hug.

"Missed you girl! What are doing back here?" She asked.

"Just wanted to come back to see everyone," Gena pulled away smiling. "And visit my mom." Gena's smile faded.

"Well, happy your back, even if it is for a visit." They sat down on an oversized blanket and started catching up on the last few months. Ashlynne left them and found some random guy to flirt with. Throughout the next couple of hours everyone was talking to Rachel, asking questions about Boston, if she met any new friends, if she dated any guys. She didn't want to talk about Billy; she didn't want to even think of him tonight.

The night had started to die down, fewer questions were being asked and less people were sitting next to her. She had finally gotten a few minutes to herself when someone was standing behind her. A chill ran down her spine. She took a deep breath knowing it couldn't be him.

"Ray?" A soothing deep voice said. She turned her head and gasped. She hadn't seen him in months.

"Matt?" Rachel said almost in a whisper. Her heart began to flutter at the sight of someone she used to love. Matt's hazel eyes were bright from the glow of the flames. His perfect smile spread across his perfect clean shaven face. He hadn't changed much since the last time she saw him. Several months before her mother died she had called him her boyfriend, the love of her life, the man she was sure to marry some day. His tall lean muscular figure stood over her. His fitted t-shirt let his tattooed arms show. He wore a black baseball cap slightly to the side, which Rachel used to love. She smiled back at him as she stood up. His smile was big but his eyes confused.

"What are doing here?" Matt said puting his hands to his hips.

"Visiting." Rachel didn't want to tell him the truth. She didn't want him to know that she ran away from her crazy ex boyfriend and his gang of murderers. Matt stared at her for several seconds before he grabbed her into a hug. It was tight and secure. Rachel didn't realize how much she missed him until that moment. He smelt the same. The warmth he gave was the still same. She closed her eyes tight as the tears started to form.

"It's good to see you." He whispered in her ear. Chills ran through her body. Why did she let him leave her? Her mother was ill and in desperate need for help. Rachel had spent every free moment taking care of her. The strain it put on hers and Matt's relationship was the result of him leaving. She didn't even fight for him. She knew he just needed her to tell him she needed him and he would have stayed. But she let him leave. She let the one perfect thing in her life slip away. Matt pulled away from her looking down in her eyes. He had the "bad boy" persona, but evened it out with his boyish good looks and crazy sense of humor. "You look amazing." He said checking her out from head to toe. He always knew ho to make her blush even during their two year relationship.

"Who's this?" A girl with long blonde hair snuck her arm around Matt's, pulling him close to her. She eyed Rachel giving her warning glances. Rachel's heart sunk knowing she had to be with Matt. Matt was now looking uncomfortable, looking down at the floor he cleared his throat.

"Mari, this is Rachel. Rachel…Mari." Rachel put her hand out for Mari to shake. Mari looked at her with a disgusted look.

"Rachel?" Her voice rose. She looked over at Matt, her eyes peering at him. He looked over at her, guilt written across his face. "This is _the_ Rachel?" She hissed through clenched teeth. Matt nodded his head. Mari pulled away from him and stormed off. Matt was about to go after her when he looked back at Rachel.

"I'm sorry, I gotta go." He stared at her for a few seconds, his eyes soft as he looked into hers. "It's great that your back. I missed you." Rachel lost her breath. Matt walked away after Mari who was now standing down the beach with her arms crossed over her chest. She was giving Matt a hard glare waiting for him to join her. Her arms started waving around as he approached her. He started yelling back at her his own arms flying around. Rachel watched remembering their own fights. Matt was in anger management when he was a kid and attended it again when they were in high school. He controlled it better then Billy, but was just as monstrous when he reached his limit. Rachel watched as Mari stormed off to a group of girls leaving Matt by himself. He looked back at Rachel then back at Mari. Two of Matt's friends, Tony and Jack that Rachel remembered from school went up to Matt giving him man hugs. Rachel sighed and sat back down. Her cell phone rang next to her making her jump. It was off the entire time she was back in LA. She decided to put it on tonight but hadn't received any calls until now. Her apartment's number glowed on the screen as she sighed.

"Hello."

"Rachel…its Joe." Rachel closed her eyes knowing if Joe was calling, it couldn't be good.

"Hi Joe, what's up?"

"What's up? Are you fuckin' kidding me?" She could hear him sigh through the phone. "Billy knows where you are." Rachel's body froze. Nicole was the only one who knew where she was. What had Billy done to make her tell? "He isn't happy. This is the worst I have ever seen him. After he completely lost it, destroying everything in his path, he decided to go to the end of a few bottles. Among other things. He's been high and drunk since he found out."

"High?" From what she knew Billy never did drugs. Not as long as she had known him. Other then his prescription pain killers he took after he was shot, she had never seen him take a drug. He didn't want to be the people he sold to. He didn't like the feeling of not being in control of himself and everything around him. When you're high your weak. Billy hated being weak.

"Rachel, listen to me, you have to come back. Before things get worse."

"No!" She didn't realize how loud she was until she looked up to a few faces looking at her. Matt was one of the faces, his eyebrows narrowed. "I can't come back. Not yet anyway. I need time Joe."

"Do you understand what I'm saying to you? My brother has never been this way. Billy Darley does not act this way. Not until you came into his life. There is no saying what he's capable of." There was a pause. "Just ask Nicole."

"What did he do?" Rachel's voice quivered.

"What he does best. Makes you fear for your life until you give him what he wants." Rachel shut her eyes. She couldn't go back. Not now. Maybe not ever. Nicole was someone she cared deeply for, but running back wasn't going to make anything Billy did go away.

"I have to go Joe."

"If you honestly think he won't fuckin' come get you, you obviously have been blind the past few months." Joe hung up leaving Rachel's stomach in knots. She closed her phone and walked to Ashlynne.

"I think I'm going to head back to your house. I'm not feeling too good." Ashlynne looked down at Rachel's cell phone.

"Was that him?" Rachel shook her head telling her it was Nicole. Ashlynne nodded her head not sure if she believed her. She handed Rachel her key card while Rachel called a cab. There was a cab in the neighborhood so Rachel walked to the entrance of the beach. Matt stopped her as she walked past him.

"Where're you going?" Matt asked his hand on her arm.

"I'm not feeling well. I'm going to head back."

"Where're you staying?"

"At Ashlynne's. I gotta go." She walked away from Matt. He watched her as she stood on the sidewalk outside the entrance of the beach. She held her flip flops in her hand as she placed her arms across her chest. The cab pulled up seconds later. She climbed in the cab and left. Matt always knew when something was wrong with her. He had known her his whole life. He knew when she was in trouble.

--

Rachel sat on the couch, her legs pulled up to her chest. She had been that way since she got back to Ashlynne's apartment. She didn't know what to do anymore. She was torn between who she was and who she was becoming. Her thoughts were interrupted by a loud knock at the door. Her head snapped to the sound, her heart raced as her breathing increased. It couldn't be. Nicole didn't even know where Ashlynne lived. She slowly put her feet to the ground and stood up. She walked to the door and looked through the peep whole. Her eyes narrowed with confusion as she looked at the person on the other side. She opened the door quickly. Matt looked back at her and slowly smiled.

"I thought you might need someone to talk to." Rachel sighed with relief knowing she would feel better with him there. She stood aside letting Matt walk in. She closed the door and turned to him.

"I'm happy you're here." She said smiling. Matt's boyish smile showed the dimples in his cheeks that Rachel used to kiss. She smiled remembering how it always made him laugh. He sat down on the couch, Rachel quickly following. There were butterflies in her stomach as she looked over at him. She noticed the lip ring he had earlier but didn't say anything. She was too mesmerized by the idea of him being there.

"So, when did you get that?" She asked pointing to his lip. He smiled and looked down.

"Not long after you left to go live with your father." He looked back at her, his smiled fading. "What happened back at the beach?" She knew he was referring to the phone call she received. She sighed leaning back on the couch.

"My life is slowly becoming a mess. And I have no idea what to do anymore." He shifted his weight, facing her now.

"Talk to me. I was always good at listening."

"And helping." She smiled at him. "I met someone," she looked away from him. "He reminds me of you, a lot."

"Really?" He smirked.

"Yeah, he's hot headed and extremely stubborn." They both laughed.

"Well, what's the problem? Was that him on the phone?"

"No, that was his brother." Rachel sighed again, not sure where to begin. "I left him."

"That's why you're here." Matt said.

"Yes. And I know how mad he is, which is making it that much easier not to go back."

"Has he ever hurt you," Matt cleared his throat "physically?" Rachel's head snapped towards him, her eye narrowing. Matt nodded to the scrapes that were healing on her cheek. She put her hand to it.

"No!" She shook her head. "He would never lay a hand on me. But something did happen, and I don't know what to."

"It must be bad." Rachel sat up quickly, leaning closer to Matt.

"If I tell you what happened, you can't tell anyone. No one!" Matt nodded his head. "Billy…he's a…" Rachel hesitated on getting the words to come out of her mouth. She knew though that Matt would understand. He himself had been in that kind of environment for many years. He would know what to say and what she should do. "…he's the leader of a prestige gang in Boston." Matt's eyes widened. His mouth opened slightly. He cleared his throat shifting in his seat. "I know…I still can't believe it…but he…he's really good looking." Matt laughed.

"So that's what gets you hot, a good looking gang leader?" Rachel smacked his arm.

"This is serious! I really don't know what to do."

"When you say _prestige_, you mean feared don't you?" Rachel nodded her head. "Tell me what happened Ray." Matt sighed.

"I was attacked a couple of weeks ago by some guy that apparently doesn't get along with Billy. That's how I got this." She pointed to her cheek. "Billy went crazy and from what I was told he hurt two of them, well not the guy that attacked me but two of his men. Almost as a warning of what was coming, I suppose." She held back tears remembering the horror of what happened next. "We were shot at about a week later. Billy got hit in his side. It was only a flesh wound and he needed minor surgery to close it, but if you could have seen all the blood…" She sighed still fighting back the tears.

"What happened to him?"

"He was in the hospital for a few hours. They stitched him up and we left. He didn't want to be there anymore. But it was all I could take. I broke up with him that night and I left a few days later." Her eyes watered and her lip quivered as she spoke.

"Do you love him?' Matt asked flatly.

"Yes." There was no hesitation. She knew she loved him, but that wasn't enough. "Loving someone doesn't mean you have to stay with them." Matt nodded his head knowing all to well what she meant. "I really thought something good would come out of me being his girl, but so far it hasn't. I just don't want to bury him because of who he chooses to be."

"Why don't you tell him this?"

"I don't have to. He knows and he has told me enough times that I knew who he was and what he did before I chose to be his."

"He's right about that." Rachel looked at him, her face annoyed. "I'm sorry but if you chose to be with him knowing all about him, then you were ok with it."

"I just didn't know it would be this bad. We all could have died." The tears began to form again, this time she couldn't control them. Matt grabbed her, pulling her close to him.

"Don't cry Ray," Matt said rubbing her back. "I'm here." Rachel let out tears that had been held in for days. She couldn't stop, having to catch her breath several times. This went on for some time before she finally calmed down. Matt looked down at her his face flushed with emotions. He didn't like seeing her like this. It hurt every inch of him to know she was in pain.

Rachel wiped away the tears that were on her cheeks as she smiled at Matt. She was embarrassed but knew she needed to let it out. Their eyes met right before Matt leaned down crashing his lips onto Rachel's. She let out a loud gasp surprised at what just happened. She knew she should have pushed him away but the feeling of his soft lips against hers sent chills down her body. She grabbed the back of his neck hungrily kissing him, making them both lose their breath. Rachel pulled away grabbing Matt by the arm. She pulled him to the guest room and shut the door behind them.

--

The white substance slightly danced across the mirror as Tommy handed it to Billy. He took it without thought, grabbing the rolled up bill from Tommy's other hand. He leaned down placing the bill to his nose and quickly inhaled the long thick line Tommy had made for him. It wasn't something he did often but he needed it tonight. He wiped his finger across the mirror grabbing the last of the powder and placed it in his mouth. The numbness on his gums made the high even better. He handed Tommy back the mirror and grabbed his bottle of whiskey. He poured himself two shots, downing them both without a breath in between.

"Where the fuck is Heco?" Billy asked lighting a cigarette.

"He went to pick up his girl from work." Tommy said after he snorted his line.

"She still shakes her ass for horny old men at that sleazy bar?" Billy laughed.

"That she does." Tommy nodded. They were at Tommy's apartment tonight. He didn't feel like being bothered with his brother and Bodie at the bar. Bodie would just bring his high down lecturing him on how they didn't _do_ what they _sold_. Joe would talk about Rachel and how to get her back. All Billy wanted to do was slip into his own world for the night and not think about the girl he wanted. His anger had consumed him to the point where he couldn't breathe or even see straight. Seeing Nicole on the floor crying because of him only made it worse. He would never hurt her, but it was easy to make her think he would. Rachel was gone and he needed to let her go. He didn't know how but the drugs and the booze were helping him forget.

"He better fuckin' get his ass back here soon. I'm tired of always waitin' for him."

"You really sending him out to work tonight?" Tommy asked smirking.

"Damn fuckin' right I am. He supplied us with a good night, now he can be on his way." They both laughed. "I need my fuckin' cigarettes, I'm down to three." The front door opened with force. Heco walked through with his high laughing girlfriend at his arm.

"What the fuck is she doin' here?" Billy asked.

"Relax man. I'm bringin' her home." He put his hands up at Billy. "I just needed to drop something other then you cigarettes off before I did." Heco smiled and moved to the side. A tall dark haired girl walked in smiling right at Billy. Billy sat up straight, his jaw clenched as he glared at her.

"Hey Billy." Jessica said giving him a smirk. Billy's nostrils flared his lips tightening as he stood up. He felt the rush go to his head but ignored it. This girl had a lot of nerve coming near him after the shit she pulled.

"What the fuck are you thinking Heco?" Tommy asked his face serious. Heco shrugged his shoulders.

"She was at the fuckin' deli. She's fuckin' drunk and I figured," Heco was stopped by Billy.

"Get her the fuck out of my sight." Billy ordered him. Heco sighed and grabbed Jessica's arm pulling her to the door. She yanked her arm free and stormed over to Billy.

"Now I'm not good enough for you huh? But before you called that bitch your girlfriend it was my bed you crawled into." Jessica's voice rose as Billy stood straight. He wanted to knock this girl down to the floor.

"Bring her the fuck home Heco." Billy said as he clenched his teeth.

"No," she turned to Heco her finger pointed at him. "I'll find my own fuckin' way home." Heco's girlfriend pulled on his arm to leave. Billy didn't even look up as Heco closed the door behind him. Jessica was only inches from Billy. Her hands at her hips as she smirked at him.

"Does she even know?" She asked.

"What the fuck you talking about?"

"Rachel? Does she even know about us?"

"There's no us!"

"Maybe not now, but there was was."

"There was fuckin' nothing!"

"Sure felt like something when you were fucking me!" Billy sniffed loudly as he got closer to her. "I bet even after she dumped your ass you still didn't have the balls to tell her we did it."

"I'm giving you one chance to leave."

"Or what Billy?" Billy reached behind her head and grabbed a handful of hair. He twisted it in his fist making Jessica wince. He pulled her face to his, his teeth clenched as he spoke.

"Do you really want to see what I'm capable of?"

"She isn't worth it. She left you the same day you got fucking shot. Some girlfriend." Billy pulled tighter on her hair. She closed her eyes tightly trying to block the pain. "She's probably with some guy right now forgetting all about you." Billy's grip loosened as he stared at her. The idea of Rachel with someone else hadn't even crossed his mind. She left without saying anything to him, ran away from him in the middle of the night. What if she was with someone else? What if that's why she left in the first place, to be with someone back in LA? He let go of Jessica's hair, her hand rubbing the spot he just pulled. She gave him a smirk knowing her words were affecting him. She placed her hand on his chest playing with the silver cross she knew Rachel had bought him. She moved her face closer to his. He wasn't looking at her now, his eyes locked at the wall behind her.

"Why should she have all the fun?" Jessica whispered. Billy's eyes shot down to hers. They narrowed as he thought about her words. A small smirk played across his lips.

"Tommy, go take a walk," Billy said eyeing Jessica. "A really _long_ walk." Tommy's eyes widened.

"You're fuckin' kiddin' me right?" Billy didn't answer as he grabbed Jessica's waste. He pulled her close to him, her feeling exactly what he wanted.

"Now!" Billy ordered right before he leaned down crashing his mouth onto Jessica's neck. Tommy cursed under his breath complaining about being kicked out of his own apartment so someone else can get laid as he stormed out the door. Billy was ripping at Jessica's clothes. He couldn't get to her fast enough. He pushed her on the couch Tommy had just occupied. He pulled his shirt off throwing it behind him. She ran her hand over his bandage before she took her own shirt off. Billy forcefully pulled her jeans open, ripping then down her legs.

"Ow, be careful!" She whined.

"Shut the fuck up!" Billy barked. He opened his jeans kicking them to the floor. He slammed his lips against hers as he placed himself inside of her. She knew he didn't want her, she knew he was high and was pissed off. But she didn't care. She had Billy exactly where she wanted him.

--

Billy groaned as he placed his feet on the floor and his head in his hands. His mouth was dry and his nose was burning. "Fuck!" He yelled. The pounding in his head increased with every movement. A stabbing feeling of regret took over him as he remembered the night before. His side was sore as he groaned and lifted himself off the bed. He got dressed then headed to the hall. Joe and Bodie were sitting on the couch as Billy slowly walked to the bathroom.

"He looks like shit." Bodie said standing up. He took a step closer to the hallway. "We're all dead if he doesn't get his shit in order." He looked back at Joe. "When the fuck is Rachel coming back?"

"I don't know if she's even coming back." Bodie's faced dropped. He knew if she didn't get herself back to Billy things were going to get worse. For the past few days Billy hadn't kept up on his duties as well as he had before. He was already three days late on going to Bones.

"This has to fuckin stop dog. I seen your brother on his down days and they are fuckin' Disney Land compared to this shit."

"What the fuck you bitchen about now?" Billy said walking past them to the kitchen. He reached in the frig and grabbed a bottle of soda. He opened the cabinet next to the frig and pulled out his pain killers, popping three pills into his mouth. He downed the remaining soda in one gulp. He turned and sat at the table with a loud thud.

"What the fuck is the problem?" He asked as he lit a cigarette.

"The fuckin' problem is Bones is gonna reach out to us all soon if you don't get your shit together." Bodie said sitting across from him.

"I'll deal with fuckin' Bones. Don't you worry yourself about him."

"What the fuck would Rachel think seeing you like this?" Bodie asked not regretting a word he said. Billy's face twisted with anger.

"Fuck her! That fuckin' bitch left without givin' a shit less what happened to me." Billy slammed his hand on the table making Joe jump. Joe was trying his best to be patient with his brother. He knew he was angry but he only saw his side of things. The side that hurt him. Joe got up and headed towards the door.

"Where the fuck do you think your going?" Billy yelled. Joe turned around quickly.

"Nicole's."

"Ah, the whores best friend." Billy said taking a drag from his cigarette. Joe took a step closer, his face turning red. Rachel didn't deserve to be called that.

"You're the one fucking Jessica, but Rachel's the whore?" Billy squinted his eyes at his brother. "Did you forget already that you brought that dirty slut to the bar last night? That you practically fucked her on the pool table in front of all of us?" Billy had forgotten. "And that's including Nicole, Rachel's best friend."

"Who the fuck cares?" Billy said standing up.

"When Jessica blabs her mouth to Rachel, I'm sure she'll be the one who cares." Billy stormed out of the apartment. He didn't want to hear it anymore. He knew he screwed up, but the damage was done. Besides he knew she was never coming back.

"You got a big mouth baby boy." Bodie said shaking his head. "Your brother has never cared for anyone other then you his whole life. This girl who he actually loves just picks up and leaves without so much as a note and your acting like what he's doing is wrong."

"Did you ever think about why she left Bode? The girl was almost raped by enemies of ours. Then she goes into shock seeing the man she loves blood all over her." Joe walked back to the door and opened it. "How much more did you really think she could take?" Bodie sighed as he watched Joe leave. He knew he was right. Rachel was a good person who didn't deserve what happened. But she did love Billy and Billy was going to become an endless tornado, taking everything down in his path. And that meant they all would perish in that storm. Bodie couldn't let that happen. Not without talking to Rachel himself. He stood up and decided to have a talk with someone who would give more information then Nicole would.

--

Bodie stood in front of the door waiting as patiently as he could for someone to answer. He looked out of place in this neighborhood but he didn't care. He was there for a reason and he wasn't leaving until he got the answers he needed. The door finally opened as a man who resembled Rachel stared back at him.

"May I help you?" the man said.

"Yeah actually you can. I'm looking for Mr. Hedlund, Rachel's father." The man cleared his throat and nodded.

"I'm Rachel's father." He crossed his arms over his chest; a look of concern fell over his face. "Is she alright?"

"Well that's the thing sir. She headed back to LA. She wanted to go visit some friends and go see her mother's grave. She called me all upset and in a panic but the phone went dead before I could ask her what happened. I called her cell several times after that but it went straight to voice mail." Bodie talked as proper as he could, trying to convince her father his intensions were strictly for her safety. "I was wondering if you could tell me where she would go, what friend she would stay with." Rachel's father looked at Bodie suspiciously.

"I'm sorry, your name is?" He asked.

"Oh Charles sir," Bodie stuck his hand out for him to shake. "Charles Nelson." Her father nodded his hand still questioning who he might be.

"And how do you know my daughter?"

"Through Nicole." He pointed to the house behind him. Rachel's father nodded his head.

"I didn't want to alarm you sir. I just really would rather be safe then sorry." Rachel's father agreed as he nodded his head. He didn't know if he could believe this man but if he was telling the truth and he didn't help and something happened to Rachel he didn't know what he would do.

"The only person I know she would go to is Ashlynne. I have her address and phone number." Rachel's father left Bodie at the door and wrote down the information he needed. He returned to the door and handed him the paper.

"Thank you sir." Bodie turned to leave when her father stopped him.

"Could you tell my daughter that I love her?" Bodie nodded his head. "And tell her…I miss her." Bodie knew about what happened between Rachel and her father. He sympathized with her, knowing how it felt to have a parent turn their back on you.

"I will definitely tell her sir." Bodie got in his car and headed towards the airport.


	17. Chapter 17

The knocking at the door was making the irritation Rachel was feeling worsen. She had been up for several hours thinking about what she had done. While it was happening she didn't want it to stop. But now she lay there on the couch feeling every inch of her body shake. If he was to ever find out he would kill her. She knew they weren't together anymore and may never be again, but that wouldn't matter to him. Matt had left early that morning baring the same guilt she did. He kissed her deeply before leaving knowing it may be the last time they saw one another. The knocking grew louder and more impatient. Rachel sighed before slowly rising to her feet. She walked to the door opening it without looking through the peep hole.

"Took you long enough!" Ashlynne yelled trying not to drop the bags that were slowly slipping from her hands. Rachel looked embarrassed as she grabbed a couple of bags from her.

"I'm sorry. I was in another world." Rachel placed the bags on the kitchen table. Ashlynne eyed her, smirking as she starting to take the items from the bags.

"Matt's hot sex world maybe?" Rachel's face dropped. She didn't think Ashlynne had heard them, but from the grin across her face Rachel knew she had.

"Please tell me you didn't hear us?"

"Ray, _who _didn't hear you?" Ashlynne busted out laughing. She had heard them as soon as she walked in the front door. Rachel's cheeks turned a deep pink as she lowered her head. She was embarrassed more for the fact she had slept with someone other then Billy. Ashlynne put her hand on her shoulder.

"Don't beat yourself up over this. I think you deserved a moment for yourself." Rachel shrugged. Ashlynne finished putting the groceries away. She told Rachel to get dressed and get ready to be out of the house for the rest of the day. Rachel walked to the guest room and dressed into a pair of khaki shorts and a baby blue fitted polo shirt. She threw her hair back in a ponytail and walked out to the living room. Ashlynne was standing by the front door waiting for her.

"Ready?" Ashlynne asked.

"We're we going?"

"Somewhere you need to be." They left the apartment and drove down the main highway. They drove for some time, Rachel unsure of where they were going. Rachel's heart stopped when they pulled off to the exit that headed to the cemetery. Ashlynne pulled into the cemetery not giving notice to Rachel's saddened expression. She stopped the car, finally looking over to her.

"I'll be in the car." She nodded up the hill. Rachel smiled at her and climbed out. She walked slowly crossing her arms over her chest as she made her way up the grassy hill past the many loved ones that no longer walked the earth. Rachel stopped when she saw her mother's grave. The last time she was there was before she knew what her new life would be in Boston. She was herself, the Rachel she knew the last time she was here. She dropped to her knees no longer able to control herself. She leaned over and let the tears flow. She mumbled to herself about how she missed her mother and how much she loved her. She begged her mother for guidance. Warm memories of her mother filled her mind.

--

"Mom!" Rachel yelled as her mother lost her balance. Rachel's hand flew to her mouth trying to control her laughter.

"This isn't funny Rachel!" She yelled at her daughter holding in her own laughter.

"Oh but it really is _Rebecca_!"

"It's mom to you missy!" Rebecca sighed as she held onto the side of the rink. "Why do I let you talk me into these things?"

"This was your idea!" Rachel skated past her mother waving her fingers at her as she passed. Rebecca smiled loving every second of her daughter's happiness. She straightened herself out and took a deep breath. She slowly skated along the wall getting herself back in a groove. Once she felt safe enough she let go trying to reach her daughter.

"I see your getting better." Rachel said as her mother approached.

"I'm hungry." Rebecca whined rubbing her belly. Rachel laughed as she wrapped her arm around her mother's.

"Hot dogs?"

"Pizza!" Rachel said pulling her mother out of the rink and onto the rug. They both laughed as her mother fell into a booth.

"Pizza it is." Rebecca reached down taking her skates off, Rachel doing the same. "So, are you going to tell me how things are going with you and Matt?"

"Really good actually." Rachel smiled. The waiter came over and took their orders. Rebecca looked at her daughter who was a spitting image of herself. "It's just, he isn't exactly what you and dad had in mind for me."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, he's a "bad boy" if you will." Rebecca laughed at her daughters comment.

"A bad boy huh? He's _really _good looking." She winked at her daughter.

"Mom, I'm serious. Dad would have a heart attack if he knew about Matt, let alone half the things he's done."

"Listen," Rebecca sighed as she leaned closer to her daughter. "Is he nice to you?" Rachel nodded her head. "Does he treat you good? Does he get you involved in anything he does?" Rachel nodded her head to the first question and shook it no for the next. "You can't hold it against someone for who they are, especially if they make you happy. Do you care about him? I mean I know your young but you can care about someone."

"I love him mom." Rebecca smiled.

"Please don't do the same thing I did. Let go of something that could have been really good just because other people didn't think it was good enough for you." Rachel knew exactly who she was talking about. Rachel's mother was in love with her father and stayed away from him because he wasn't what her mother had hoped for her. She knew her parents were both miserable and in love with one another. She never wanted to know that feeling of wondering what if.

--

Rachel opened her eyes and cried. She knew her mother would have supported her relationship with Billy. She would have told her to be there for him and help him through this tough time. She wouldn't have been ok with the shooting or the attack but she would have understood any decision Rachel made.

"I miss you so much." She whispered as she ran her hand across her mother's name. "I need your help right now. I didn't know what else to do. I didn't mean to leave him when he needed me." Ashlynne could see Rachel crying at her mother's grave. She hated to see her friend hurting and knowing there as nothing she could do to make her feel better. Rachel stood up and straightened her back. Being closer to her mother again was what she needed. She wasn't sure what she was going to do yet but she knew she felt better.

They left the cemetery in silence and headed to a restaurant to have dinner. Rachel didn't realize how long she had sat with her mother, but the bright light blue sky was now getting darker with beautiful shades of orange and purple. They went to a small restaurant where they sat outside to eat. They talked about everything that was happening in both of their lives, things they hoped to happen for the future and everything in between. They left after a couple of hours then headed back to Ashlynne's apartment. Rachel was tired and wanting nothing more then to lay her head on her pillow and sleep until her body could no longer stay asleep. They rode the elevator up to Ashlynne's floor and walked off when the doors opened, laughing about something the doorman had said when Ashlynne noticed a man sitting on the floor in front of her door.

"Who the hell is that?" Ashlynne walked quickly to the man. Rachel couldn't see him until Ashlynne was standing in front of him. Rachel stopped walking and looked at him as he rose up smirking at Ashlynne."Can I help you?" Ashlynne said her hands on her hips. He was a bit taller then her. He looked down at her checking out all she had to offer.

"Baby," he licked his lips and rubbed his palms together as he looked into her eyes. "You can help me with anything you want." She made a disgusted noise then looked over at Rachel. Ashlynne's posture straightened as she saw Rachel's terrified expression. The man followed her gaze staring back at Rachel. Rachel's eye franticly scanned around the hall.

"He isn't here." Bodie said. He took a step forward making Rachel take a step back.

"Why are you here Bodie?" Rachel sighed.

"You gotta come back Ray. Things are really bad." Rachel could see the seriousness in Bodie's eyes.

"Wait, who is this?" Ashlynne asked pointing to Bodie. Bodie looked over at her and smiled.

"I'm whoever you want me to be baby." Ashlynne looked back at him confused. Rachel had walked up to them crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"This is Bodie," Rachel sighed then looked over to Ashlynne. "Billy's best friend." Ashlynne's eyes widened at her statement.

"She isn't going back to him." Ashlynne said as she turned to her door and opened it. Rachel motioned for Bodie to follow then in the apartment. "Over my dead body she goes back there." Ashlynne hissed.

"I didn't come for trouble," Bodie said looking at Ashlynne. "but Ray, I'm not leaving without you." He said now looking at Rachel. Rachel bit her bottom lip, her mind racing. She missed Billy more then she even knew, but the idea of going back to him made her sick. Sick with worry of what he would do when she got there.

"Why do you need her to go back?" Ashlynne asked as she leaned on the table. Bodie looked over at her then back at Rachel.

"He's bad. The worse even I've seen him. Billy does what he sells, and now he's barely selling. More like… just doing."

"Billy doesn't do drugs." Rachel said. Bodie sighed.

"He never _did _do drugs. But now, after you left I see him more high then straight." Rachel shook her head. She didn't believe him. Joe had mentioned something to about him doing drugs, but why would he. He was a strong person. He wouldn't let this problem get the best of him.

"I can't Bodie. I'm not ready."

"Make yourself ready Ray!" He snapped. "I told you I'm not leaving here without you." Rachel looked over to Ashlynne who was clenching her jaw at Bodie. She looked over at Rachel. Her eyes narrowed when she saw Rachel expression change.

"Your not actually considering going back there?" Ashlynne's asked. Rachel's mind was playing tug of war as she stared at Ashlynne. She didn't want to go back, but she didn't want to be the reason for Billy's downfall. She did miss him and want to see him again, but she was scared. She was starting to confuse herself when she finally spoke.

"I," she sighed "I think I should go back." Ashlynne growled as she slammed her hand on the table. She stormed into her room and slammed the door. Rachel looked over to Bodie who was smiling.

"You know I would never come get you if I didn't feel it needed to be done." Bodie said. Rachel nodded her head. She knew he must be desperate but she was still fearing going back to Billy. "Pack your things. I have two tickets to Boston, and I need to get going. I've already been gone long enough." Rachel's eyes started to water as she nodded her head again. She slowly turned and headed to her room. She was shaking and her stomach was hurting. She closed the door behind her leaning her back against the door. She closed her eyes and sighed, letting the tears slowly drop down her cheeks. Billy's face flashed in her mind. What would he do when he saw her? She didn't want to think about it. She shook her head and wiped her cheeks as she grabbed her suitcases and started to pack.

It had taken her longer then she expected to pack her things. She had scattered most of her stuff across the room not expecting to leave any time soon. She zipped up her last bag and opened the door. She knocked on Ashlynne's door and waited for her to answer. She could hear Ashlynne giggling in the kitchen. Rachel slowly walked out of the hall and stopped when she saw Bodie leaning over Ashlynne who was sitting on the counter. She was playing with a chain that was around his neck. Rachel's eyes narrowed at her friend. She had lectured Rachel several times over her stay about getting involved with men like Matt and Billy, but yet here she was flirting with someone who was exactly like them. Rachel cleared her throat making them stop their almost make-out session.

"I'm ready." Rachel said as she started for the door. Ashlynne hopped off the counter and followed Bodie and Rachel to the parking lot.

--

"If anything happens you call me and I will be there. I'll take the first flight out to come get you." She grabbed her friend and hugged her tight. Rachel closed her eyes knowing how lucky she was to have her.

"Thank you for being there for me." Rachel kissed Ashlynne's cheek and turned to board the plane. Bodie handed Ashlynne a piece of paper then whispered something in her ear making her cheeks turn a light shade of pink. Ashlynne watched as Rachel and Bodie walked down the long hall until she could no longer see them. She smirked to herself now understanding how easy it was to like a bad boy.

--

Bodie pulled in front of Rachel's building. He sighed before he looked over at her. She was staring out the front window biting on her nails. Her leg was shaking and her eyes were wide. He could see how nervous she was. And she had every right to be. He hadn't fully thought it through before he went to get her. He didn't know how Billy would react to her being back. All he could think about was not getting killed by Bones.

"Remember, this is between me and you." Bodie spoke. She nodded her head. "If Billy was to find out I went to get you," Bodie shook his head at the thought of what Billy was actually capable of. "He would most likely kill us both." Rachel made a huff noise. "Go in, unpack your stuff then call him. Let him know your back." Rachel looked over at Bodie and smiled.

"Thank you."

"For what?" Bodie narrowed his eyes.

"For always being so nice to me." She smiled.

"You're a good girl Ray. Your like my sister ya'know." Rachel smiled before she climbed out of Bodie's car. She grabbed her suitcases and headed for the doors. After Bodie pulled away she stopped walking. She turned and headed towards her truck. She didn't want to call him. She needed to see him. She wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible. Her hands shook as she pushed her key into the ignition. She took several deep breaths before she pulled away.

--

Rachel placed her hands on the steering wheel and closed her eyes. She had been in the parking lot of the Four Roses for almost twenty minutes. Every time she tried to get out of the truck that same fear she had earlier completely took over. She had noticed Billy's car as soon as she pulled in. Heco's car was also there with several others she didn't know. She had to do this, she had to let him know she was back. Her hands shook as she opened the door. She climbed out and hesitantly walked to the entrance of the bar. She reached down to the door handle when the door burst open. A very drunk woman came falling out almost hitting the floor with a equally drink man laughing behind her. Rachel took a deep breath then walked in.

The place was overly crowded making Rachel's efforts to get to the back of the bar almost impossible. Several men bumped into her without notice. The heavy smoke that filled the room was making her chest tighten. After several 'excuse me's' and even more nudges she finally made it past the herd of drunken people. Rachel's fear quickly turned to hurt when she finally landed her eyes on Billy. The dark circles under his eyes indicated his lack of sleep. His pale face and red nose proved Bodie and Joe's complaints. He looked different, and it scared her. But that wasn't why she was sad. The brunette on his lap kissing his neck while he smoked his cigarette was making her entire body tremble. She knew who it was the second she laid eyes on her but prayed that she was wrong. When Jessica moved her face to try to kiss Billy's lips there was no question it was her. Rachel couldn't move as she watched Jessica rub her hand up the inside of Billy's thigh. Everything around her felt as if it was closing in. She couldn't move, couldn't speak. All she could do was watch as Billy smirked at Jessica.

Joe lit a cigarette, leaning his head back as he inhaled. He slowly let it out and realized he wanted another drink. He looked over to the bar to wave down the waitress when his eyes landed on Rachel. His eyes widened as he elbowed Billy. Billy grunted and turned to his brother to curse him for interrupting him.

"Billy." Joe whispered.

"What the fuck Joe?" Joe nodded his head and Billy followed his gaze. The cigarette that loosely hung from his lips fell to the floor as his eyes locked with Rachel's. He pushed Jessica off of him sending her crashing to the floor. Billy rose to his feet, his eyes wide and his breathing heavy. Rachel's eyes watered with fresh tears as she broke her stare and headed back out of the Four Roses. She tried desperately to catch her breath as she pushed through the doors and walked quickly to her truck. Tears warmed her cheeks in the cool air but made it impossible to see what she was doing. She cursed at herself as she tried to find the right key to her truck.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Billy screamed from behind her. She turned to see him walking quickly towards her. She turned back trying desperately to get her truck open. Billy's hand slammed on the window making Rachel scream. He dug his fingers into her shoulder spinning her around to face him. His eyes glazed over as they looked at her. Her breathing had become so heavy Billy's eyes fell on her chest watching as she tried to catch her breath. He looked back into her eyes putting his face closer to hers.

"I said, what the fuck are you doing here?" He said more calmly.

"For," she started to cry as she spoke. She couldn't believe he had someone else touching him, kissing him. And to have it be Jessica out of all people was ripping Rachel's insides apart. "For you." She barely whispered.

"For me?" Billy laughed. "You came here for me?" He yelled making Rachel shut her eyes. She didn't recognize this person. This wasn't Billy. "I asked you a fuckin' question!" Billy yelled slamming his hand on the glass again. Rachel jumped her eyes wide with fright.

"Yes!" She yelled. "I came here for you. To see you. To…tell you I was back." Billy's lips curled up at the ends as he pulled his face further from Rachel's.

"And what did you think huh? That I was going to take you back?" Rachel didn't know what to say. "I don't give second chances." He said flatly. Rachel bit her bottom lip trying not to sob in front of him but it couldn't be controlled. "Your not welcome here, now leave!" Billy turned and walked away. She couldn't believe what he was saying to her. Had he replaced her with Jessica?

"Your leaving me to go be with _her_?" Rachel cried. She couldn't help the tears as they fell down her face. Billy stopped turning back to her.

"Go home Rachel." There was no emotion in his words or his face. She watched as he walked back into the bar. She turned and looked for the key again. Her sobs were uncontrollable as she finally got the door open. She climbed in and shut the door. She placed her head on the steering wheel and cried. This wasn't supposed to be how it happened. She expected anger and yelling, but never did she think he would have been with someone else. Rachel cried for some time before she tried to compose herself. Seeing him the way he was, with who he was with hurt every inch of her body. Jessica was all over him like he was her property. Billy looking at her with want, smirking at her as she smiled back at him. Who was he? She wasn't gone long enough for him to have found comfort in someone else's arms. How could he be with someone else? Matt's face flashed in her mind, memories of their night together played again. How could she be a hypocrite? She wiped her face and climbed out of her truck. She couldn't leave things like this. She needed him to know she was sorry for leaving.

--

Billy burst through the door and walked straight to Sammy at the bar. Billy nodded letting Sammy know exactly what he wanted. Billy grabbed the glass of whiskey before Sammy was done pouring it downing it in one swig. He slammed the glass down and nodded again, telling him to keep them coming. He slammed his elbows on the counter dropping his head into his hands. Why did she come back? He was so angry with her for leaving he wanted to hurt her. Seeing her now made it worse. But she was just as beautiful as always. A hand wrapped around the back of his neck making him jump. He looked over at Jessica who was smiling back at him. He narrowed his eyes at her grabbing her hand off of him.

"What are you doing?" Jessica hissed. She narrowed her eyes at him. He took a step back looking down at her with hate in his eyes.

"Don't fuckin' touch me." He snapped.

"What?" Jessica placed her hands on her hips. "First you knock me to the floor, then you storm out of here like a mad man and now, now your telling me to not touch you. What the hell is wrong with you?" Billy looked at her with questioning eyes. She hadn't seen Rachel. She didn't know she was back. Billy leaned his head closer to hers.

"I don't know what I was thinking being with a whore like you!" He hissed through clenched teeth. Billy walked past and headed towards the back room. Before he did he looked over at Jaime.

"Get her the fuck out of my sight." He ordered then disappeared into the back. Jaime got up and walked over to Jessica grabbing her by her arm.

"What the fuck," she started to protest trying to push Jaime's hand off of her. His grip was too strong. He dragged her outside pushing her towards the street.

"I think you know these streets well." Jaime laughed at her. "Go now, and don't ever come back.' Jaime slammed the door leaving Jessica dumbfound.

"Well…fuck you!" She screamed. She was mumbling and cursing under her breath as she looked through her bag for her cell phone. She ripped it out of her bag snapping the phone open. She started to dial a number when she looked up to see Rachel staring back at her.

"Holy fucking shit!" It now made sense why Billy was acting the way he was. Rachel was back and probably saw them together. Jessica smiled taking a few steps forward. "Well look who the hell has decided to come back." Rachel started to shake again as she watched Jessica take drunken steps towards her. The anger was rising in her entire body. It was taking every drop of her will power to not attack. Rachel stood up straight her jaw clenching.

"How was your little vacation away from your wounded boyfriend? Did you enjoy yourself while he was in agony?" Jessica knew too much about this situation. Throwing things in her face that was clearly none of her business. Rachel took a couple of steps closer to Jessica.

"Keep your mouth shut about shit you know nothing about!" Rachel's teeth were clenched.

"Oh," Jessica laughed "I know very well about everything I'm saying. I also know how you're the first person to ever truly hurt Billy. But don't worry," Jessica crossed her arms over chest and smirked. "I took real good care of him while you were gone." Jessica raised an eyebrow at Rachel her smirk growing across her lips. Rachel felt as if she'd be punched in the gut. Her muscles tightened and she tried to control the sudden wave of nausea that filled her stomach. She clenched her jaw tighter as she stared at the triumphant look across Jessica's face. How could Billy touch her out of all people? Rachel's body was shaking with anger as she lunged at Jessica, grabbing a chunk of her hair pulling her to the floor. Rachel jumped on top of her. She lifted her fist and sent it slamming down across Jessica's cheek. She repeated this several times while Jessica screamed for her to stop. Did she honestly think Rachel wasn't going to do anything? Did she think she could insult her with her words and get away with it? Rachel grabbed both sides of Jessica's face and slammed her head on the floor.

-

A man walked past them and headed into the bar with a smile across his face. Nothing hotter then two hot chicks fighting. The one on the top looked like she was in it for blood. He walked into the bar and announced what he had just seen.

"You guys have got to see the two chicks fighting in the parking lot." The guy smiled. Joe was standing at the bar when the man spoke. He stopped what he was doing and headed out the door knowing it had to be Rachel. Billy was sitting in his usual seat when he got up and walked quickly outside, half of the bar following. Joe's eyes widened as he watched Rachel fists flying in the air down onto Jessica's face. She was screaming and cursing as Jessica was trying desperately to defend herself. Billy walked past Joe straight to Rachel putting his arms around her waist pulling her off of Jessica. Rachel could feel herself being pulled away so she reached down grabbing a chunk of Jessica's hair pulling it making Jessica sit up.

"Let her go!" Billy yelled at Rachel. When she realized who was pulling her away she pulled on Jessica's hair harder making it pull right out of Jessica's scalp. She screamed as two men bent down to help her up. Billy had his arms still wrapped around Rachel's waist as she tried to break free from his grip. "Calm…fuckin'…down!" Billy growled. Jessica stood up crying and looking down at the blood all over her hands. She looked up at Rachel.

"You sick bitch!" she screamed. "Don't fucking take it out on me that your man shared a bed with me while you were gone!" She screamed. Rachel tried with all of her strength to pull away from Billy. She failed miserably. Joe walked over to Jessica pulling her to his face.

"You better leave now, and never show your fuckin' face around here again!" Joe hissed through clenched teeth. He pushed her towards Jaime and Heco telling them to bring her home. He looked over at Rachel as she finally broke free from Billy. They watched as Heco's car drove away. Rachel looked down at her hand and looked at the dark strands that fell through her fingers. She lifted her hand and threw the strands at Billy's chest.

"Here's your girlfriends hair." Rachel smirked then turned to her truck. She could feel Billy's eyes burning through her as she climbed into her truck. She looked over at him as he stormed back into the bar. Joe knocked on the passengers side window making Rachel jump. She unlocked the door and he climbed in.

"Your knuckles are all fucked up." he nodded to her hands. She placed her hands on the steering wheel letting her see more clearly the bloody gashes that covered every knuckle. She sighed as she looked back over to Joe.

"I came back Joe. But he doesn't want me anymore."

"Haven't you learned what my brother's about yet? If it wasn't for the drugs he started he would have been in LA dragging you back kicking and screaming. But he's so fucked up now," Joe sighed and leaned back "It's like he just doesn't give a shit. Bones has been looking for him for days. We have the money, he just hasn't given it to him yet." Joe shook his head as he thought more about the shit Billy was causing. Rachel started the truck and drove to her apartment. They were quiet when they entered her apartment not to wake Nicole who had work in the morning. Rachel grabbed the first aid kit letting Joe take care of her wounds.

"You really lumped her up huh?" Joe asked with a smirk. Rachel smiled letting out a small laugh. She did really give her all. She couldn't help it. Jessica's taunting was too much to bare. She winced as Joe poured peroxide on her wounds.

"Ow!"

"I'm sorry, but this is what you get Rocky." They both laughed. Rachel's smile slowly left her face as she thought of the reason for Jessica's taunting. Joe looked up seeing the hurt expression she wore.

"She doesn't mean anything to him." he said breaking her stare. Rachel looked up giving him a small smile. "He never thought he was going to see you again Ray. I'm not making excuses for him, but he's been," Joe sighed "really fucked up since you left." There was a long awkward silence in the room as Joe finished placing band aids on her cuts.

"That's why I came back," She couldn't tell him the real reason, Bodie made her promise. "because of what he's been doing to himself, and I knew he would be mad. Billy gets mad over everything. I knew he would be pissed Joe, but never like this." Joe nodded his head in understanding. He wasn't sure what to say to her. After Rachel brought the first aid kit back to the bathroom she sat back down across from Joe. She watched him as he lit a cigarette and relaxed.

"You want me to wake Nicole?" She asked.

"Nah, let her sleep. I'll talk to her after work tomorrow." Rachel let out a sigh making Joe look over at her. He watched as she brushed some loose strands of hair from her face. She was looking around when Joe noticed something.

"You seem different." He squinted his eyes at her. Rachel looked over at him her eyes slightly widening. Thoughts of Matt and her that night raced through her head. There was no way Joe could have known about it. No one could have known.

"Why would you say that, I mean what would make you say that?" Rachel said a little too quickly as she shifted in her seat. Joe eyed her as she stared back at him.

"I dunno…," Joe took a long pause trying to figure out what was so different about her "you just seem…different." Rachel stared back at him as she tried to keep calm. She knew he couldn't know about Matt. Joe's phone buzzed on the table making Rachel release the breath she was unknowingly holding. Joe sighed as he picked up his phone.

"What's up?" Joe said as coolly as he could.

"Where the fuck are you?" Billy yelled on the other end.

"Um…well…," Joe's stuttering was the answer Billy needed.

"I'm coming to fuckin' get you. Don't leave!" Joe closed his phone and sighed.

"I gotta go." He rose from his seat and walked to the door. Rachel stood up and followed him.

"That was him wasn't it?" She asked. Joe opened the door then turned facing Rachel.

"I'm happy you came back. Things will get back to normal now." Joe said, slightly smiling at her.

"For who?" She spat. "Who will things get back to normal for? Me?" She was angry now. How could Joe make a statement like that. Nothing about her life would go back to normal. "Because I have a father who won't talk to me and a ex boyfriend I came back for and he completely wants nothing to do with me. So I don't see anything going back to normal for _me_!"

"I meant," Joe sighed wishing he hadn't opened his mouth. His phone rang and he sighed with relief. He would rather be out there with Billy then in here with Rachel right now. He answered his phone telling Billy he was coming outside now. "I gotta go Ray. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"I'll walk you out." She said smiling. Joe shook his head. He didn't think it would be such a good idea.

"I really don't know if," Rachel didn't listen to him finish. She walked past him down the hall. Joe took a deep breath before following her.

Billy was standing with his back facing them when they reached outside. He was smoking a cigarette while he shifted his weight showing his impatience. Rachel stood her arms crossed over her chest waiting for him to turn around. Joe knew this was either going to be a screaming match or Billy was going to make her feel like shit. He didn't want to be in the middle either way. He climbed into the passengers side and shut the door. Billy turned looking directly at Rachel. His eyes widened, his jaw clenching as he took a step forward.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" He hissed.

"Excuse me?" she asked raising her eyebrows.

"You leave in the middle of the fuckin' night, do God knows what, with God knows who and you think I'm gonna just sit back and say, welcome home hunny!" He slammed his hand on the roof of his car. Rachel jumped but she still took a step closer.

"I came back for _you_. To be with _you_, to work this out. I didn't leave because I didn't love you, or because I was trying to hurt you. I left because I had reached my end. You blamed me for what happened to me…for what happened to you! Do you have any idea what I felt like seeing you," Rachel took a deep breath thinking about him turning pale from his blood loss "bleeding, and not knowing what was going to happen."

"It _was _your fuckin' fault!" He yelled slamming his hand again. "If you would have listened to me in the first place," Billy stood straight shaking his head at her. "Doesn't matter anymore because I am fuckin' done with you!" He opened the car door and pointed his finger at her. "Go back to LA, go back to the life I know you miss. There's nothing for you here." He jumped in the car and sped off, leaving a trail of smoke behind him. Rachel stood in the same position watching him speed down the block. She never knew he could be this cruel. She quickly wiped away the tears that were spilling from her eyes. She walked back to her apartment slowly closing the door behind her.

"Your back." Rachel jumped as she heard Nicole. She looked at her not sure of what to say. She knew because of her Nicole had been threatened by Billy. Nicole walked over to her hugging her tight. "I missed you so much. Please don't do that again." Nicole whispered sleepily. Rachel held her breath trying not to cry.

"I'm so sorry." She said as she pulled away.

"I miss you and want to catch up, but I have work at 8 and I am so sleepy. We'll talk more when I get home tomorrow." Nicole smiled and headed back to her room. Rachel took a deep breath before she went to her room hoping to get some sleep. She wasn't going to let Billy take over her. Especially if he didn't want her for his own anymore.

--

Rachel sighed with relief as she put her coat on. She had worked doubles all week to make up for her lost time. Nicole had explained to their boss that there was some important business she needed to attend to back home and that Nicole would take over her shifts while she was gone. Now that she was back she knew she needed to give Nicole a break. Her body ached as she walked to her truck. She had waited on two kid parties that never seemed to end. She wanted to go home, take a long hot bath and go to bed.

She had to keep the window open the whole ride home letting the cold air hit her face while she drove or she would have passed out at the wheel. She could hardly feel her legs as she walked to her apartment. After sleepily walking to her room and grabbing a change of clothes she headed to the bathroom and drew a bath. The water was perfect as she stepped in. She laid back and closed here eyes letting the hot water relax her to sleep. A banging at the bathroom made her jump making water splash all over the floor. Her heart was racing and she tried to catch her breath.

"What?" She yelled.

"I've been knocking on the door for a few minutes, are you alright?" Nicole yelled from the other side of the door. Rachel sighed and closed her eyes.

"I'm fine Nic. I must have fallen asleep."

"Well, there's someone here to see you." Rachel's body froze. Billy's face flashed in her head.

"Who?"

"Some guy Matt." Rachel's face scrunched in confusion. Matt? The only Matt she knew was her ex Matt.

"Matt who?"

"I don't know. He's really hot and has a lot of tattoos." Rachel jumped out of the tub and wrapped a towel around her body. She ripped open the door and looked past Nicole down the hall.

"Where is he?" She whispered.

"I left him outside the front door. I don't know him, I wasn't about to let some guy into the apartment just because he says he knows you." Rachel ran past Nicole to her room. She closed the door behind her. Changing into a black baby tee and pair of dark blue jeans ran out to the front door. Matt was standing with his back to her.

"What are you doing here?" She yelled. Matt turned and smiled.

"Surprise!" He sang waving his hands in the air. His big smile faded as he stared at a confused Rachel. "Me and Mari broke up."

"You flew all the way to Boston to tell me that?"

"No, but I was thinking about you and I went to Ashlynne's and she told me you came back to be with Billy. She also told me you called her to tell her he wanted nothing to do with you," Matt sighed. "I just wanted to see you and make sure you were ok." Rachel moved aside letting Matt in. She closed the door and looked over at him.

"I can't believe you came all the way here to make sure I was ok." She smiled at him. He took a few steps closer to her.

"_Are _you ok?" He asked.

"Well, "she laughed "I will admit I'm better now." The room was silent as the two stared at each other. Rachel's smile grew wider as he smirked back at her. Nicole cleared her throat. Rachel looked over at her forgetting she was in the room. Matt always did have that effect on her.

"Nicole," Rachel said as she stood next to her. "This is Matt, my ex-boyfriend." Nicole's eyes widened as she looked over at Rachel. She raised an eyebrow as she smiled. Nicole took a step closer to Matt putting her hand out for him to shake. Matt, always the charmer softly grabbed Nicole's hand pulling it to his lips. He kissed it lightly giving her his best smirk. Nicole's smile was from ear to ear as her cheeks turned a light pink.

"Nice to meet you, Nicole." Matt's dimples deepened as his smile grew.

"Why don't you come sit in the living room." Rachel laughed as she gestured for Matt to follow her.

"Um, I'll grab us some beers." Nicole said trying to hide the smile that refused to leave.

"Not many people can make her blush." Rachel said as they sat down.

"Yeah well, I seem to have that affect on hot chicks." Matt said sarcastically. They both laughed as Nicole walked in handing them their beers.

"I can't believe you came all the way here." Rachel said. Matt opened his beer and took a swig.

"Well, after you showed up in Cali the way you did, and then leaving without saying anything I just figured you really must be having some trouble. I just worry about you." Nicole squinted her eyes at Matt then looked over at Rachel who was buying his words. Rachel smiled and excused herself to the bathroom. Nicole looked over at Matt leaning in closer to him.

"Why'd you really come here?" She whispered. He looked over at her surprise in his eyes. "There's no way you flew all the way here, just to make sure she's ok. That's what phones are for." Matt leaned in closer to her. He smirked showing off those dimples again.

"The truth?" He asked raising his eyebrows.

"The truth!" Nicole demanded a slight smirk on her face.

"I want her back." Matt whispered. Nicole's eyes widened. Suddenly she didn't feel like smiling anymore.

"I don't think that's such a good idea." Matt leaned back resting his back against the couch.

"Really? And why's that?"

"Because I know Billy, and I know Rachel. Right now isn't the time for you to be trying to sweep her off her feet." Nicole's tone changed. Matt sighed as he looked around the room.

"Listen, when I broke up with her I knew I made a mistake. She was going through a tough time with her mother and I just couldn't understand," Nicole threw her hand up in the air waving him to stop talking.

"Hold on," she shifted in her seat "you mean to tell me you broke up with her when her mother was dying?" Her voice rising at the end of her question.

"I was wrong. I should have been there for her." His voice trailing off. "I just didn't realize how much I had missed her until she came back. I want to try again with her, that's why I'm here." Nicole could hear Rachel walking back down the hall. She leaned closer to Matt.

"You should have thought of that before you left her when she needed you the most." Nicole whispered, her voice stern. Her eyes darted over to Rachel as she put a fake smile across her face. The last thing she wanted was for Rachel to know how she felt about Matt. She had been through enough and seemed happy that he had showed up at their doorstep.

"So, what were you two talking about?" Rachel asked as she sat next to Matt. He had straightened his posture leaning slightly closer to Rachel. He eyed Nicole his eyes smirking at her. He wasn't a mean guy but he wanted Rachel and he knew this Nicole was going to get in the way. Nicole shifted in her seat suddenly feeling uncomfortable. Matt was going to make Rachel fall for him again and she knew Rachel would fall hard. Billy had pushed her away leaving her vulnerable and having an ex come back into her life was just the opposite of what she needed.

"We were just getting to know each other." Nicole said, not entirely lying. "So, why didn't you tell me about Matt?" Nicole took a sip of her beer as she looked over at Rachel.

"Well," Rachel laughed uncomfortably pushing some loose hair off of her forehead "I…well…I didn't want my father to know…"

"I wasn't what you'd call, the best boyfriend." Matt interrupted. "Her father would have freaked out if he knew about me."

"What did you do?" Nicole asked blatantly. Matt cleared his throat, not sure if he should answer. He had made a lot of bad decisions in his life, paying for some with jail time. But he was different now, trying to make something of himself. He cleared his throat again before he spoke.

"I ah, well…I guess I can tell you. It was a long time ago." He sighed. "Me and some guys robbed a deli when I was younger and we got caught." Rachel put her eyes down as he told his story. "I spent some time in jail, but was released early for good behavior. But, unfortunately my name went around the neighborhood. I was involved with some people that I shouldn't have been." Nicole knew she couldn't judge him. How could she when the man she was in love with had done far worse then what she was hearing.

"How about we talk about something else?" Rachel interrupted as she stood up and headed to the kitchen. Nicole and Matt stood in uncomfortable silence until Rachel came back handing them their beers. "Let's just relax and get drunk." Rachel laughed. Nicole and Matt nodded in agreement. For the next few hours they drank and talked. Nicole was tired and needed to go to sleep but couldn't bare the thought of them being alone together. She could tell Matt wasn't a bad guy but he was going to use her weakness to his advantage. She didn't want to see Rachel get hurt anymore then she had, and she knew the second word got around of Rachel with someone else Billy wouldn't take it very well. Nicole sighed with relief when Rachel let out a loud and exaggerated yawn.

"Yeah, it's getting late." Matt replied to her yawn. "I better get going." he rose to his feet, stretching before he headed to the door.

"Where are you going?" Rachel asked as she stood up.

"Motel."

"Oh no, your not staying at a motel. You can stay here." Rachel insisted. She turned and walked down the hall. Seconds later she returned with a pillow and a couple of blankets. "I'm tired. I'm heading to bed. I'll see you two in the morning." Rachel yawned again and walked to her bedroom. Nicole looked over at Matt after Rachel was no longer in view.

"I know you care for Rachel," Nicole said as she crossed her arms over her chest, "but the best thing you can do for her right now is to leave her alone." Nicole said before she turned to leave. Matt watched as she walked down the long hall to her room. He knew Rachel's best interest was only at heart, but Nicole was beginning to irritate him. He couldn't stop thinking about Rachel and their night together. He knew he needed her again and he wouldn't stop until he knew how she felt.

--

"We need to go." Nicole said impatiently as she looked from Joe to the entrance to her building. It was getting late and she knew Rachel and Matt would be leaving soon. They had woke up that morning before Nicole and had made plans to go out for the day. Nicole already had plans with Joe and Billy had done him a favor by picking Nicole up. Bodie and Heco were behind them when they pulled up. They all piled out of the cars laughing and joking while Nicole's stomach was in knots as she desperately tried to get Joe to leave.

"What's the problem babe?" He said as he lit a cigarette.

"I'm starving." She hissed. He laughed as he wrapped his arms around her. She gave him a weak smile as she looked behind her again.

"Expecting someone?" Billy asked as he leaned against his car. His icy blue eyes glared at her as he inhaled the cigarette that hung from his lips. Nicole looked back at him unsure if he could see her nervousness. She quickly looked back up at Joe and whispered in his ear.

"Please Joe….we have to go." He looked down at her his eyes narrowing.

"What's up with you?" She pulled herself up her lips brushing slightly against his ear.

"I'm trying to avoid an uncomfortable situation." she whispered. Joes eyes narrowed more as he looked behind him. He didn't even think about Rachel and the fact that she could come walking out at any moment. He didn't want to witness that altercation.

"We're hungry." He said to Billy.

"What's the rush?" Billy spat. He knew why he was being rushed but refused to let it be known. Rachel was up in her apartment and they could cross paths at any time.

"C'mon Billy," Joe reached down to open the car door when Billy moved in front of it, blocking Joe from the handle.

"When I'm done with my cigarette we'll leave." Billy smirked at Nicole. He knew she was trying to get them to leave. Rachel must be on her way down. Was her reaction going to be good? Yes. He wanted her to suffer for leaving him. He wanted to make every moment he saw her as uncomfortable as possible.

The glass door to the building opened making them all look over. Rachel walked out, her hair hanging long in big waves. She wore a fitted white long sleeve shirt and a mini skirt that would have made Billy crazy if they were still together. A tall man with tattoos covering both of his arms jogged behind her stopping next to her. He placed his arm around her shoulders as she smiled up at him. Billy ripped the cigarette out of his mouth as he watched. His breathing was heavy and could be heard by everyone near him. Rachel hadn't noticed Billy's car until she was crossing the parking lot. Her body tensed as she looked over at Billy. He had that crazy look in his eyes that Rachel knew all too well.


	18. Chapter 18

Billy stared through loathing eyes as Rachel turned her head from him. Grabbing Matt's hand she quickly pulled him to her truck. He knew she could see the anger his face had portrayed. His breathing could no longer be controlled as he could feel his chest caving in and out. Something was keeping him from running over and grabbing the man that was touching his property. Yes his property. He didn't want Rachel for his own anymore, but that didn't mean he was going to give her up to anyone else. He took a step forward but stopped. His jaw clenched like a vise grip causing throbbing pain in his face. Billy watched as Rachel sped out of the parking lot, that man in the front seat smiling at her. Her face wasn't happy. It was frightened, exactly what Billy wanted. A deep growl escaped his throat as he jumped in his car and slammed the door. The others could hear him as he cursed and screamed. Joe looked over at Nicole, his eyebrows narrowed in confusion.

"Who the fuck was that?" He questioned. She didn't know if telling the truth would be the best idea, but lying would make things worse for her. She had dealt with enough from Billy as it was, she couldn't handle anymore.

"His name's Matt," she hesitated. "Rachel's ex boyfriend."

"Miss, I'm used to 'California boys'?" Joe laughed. "_She _used to go out with _him_?"

"Yeah, he was a surprise to me too. She kept him secret from everyone. She didn't want her father to know she was dating someone like him." Nicole's eyes fell as Billy jumped out of the car.

"That's her fuckin' ex?" His voice deep and cracking. Most likely from the temper tantrum he just had in his car. Nicole nodded her head keeping her eyes far from his. That stare he projected was menacing. "Get in the fuckin' car." He hissed through clenched teeth. No one hesitated as everyone gathered in the two cars. Billy sped off, Heco following. Heco looked over at Bodie as he dialed a number in his phone.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Bodie said to the person on the other end.

"What?" Rachel asked.

"Who is that?"

"He's a friend, Bodie. That's all." He could hear her voice tremble as she pleaded.

"I tell you to come back to make Billy himself again, and you have your ex boyfriend come down?" Bodie yelled. In all the months she had know him this was the first time his voice raised towards her. If he was with her he would have see the hurt expression on her face.

"I came back. I came back to be with him, and he told me it was over. What do you want from me?" She bit the inside of her mouth to help from crying.

"He's flippin' out Ray."

"I don't' care. Tell him to go be with Jessica. I'm sure she can help calm him down." Bodie could hear the dead air after Rachel hung up. He growled at his phone as he slammed it shut. Heco's constant glancing was beginning to irritate him.

"What?" He yelled."Nothing." Heco replied. He knew not to piss Bodie off either.

"Yeah, that's right, nothing. Mind your fuckin' business and keep your fuckin' mouth shut about my conversation." Bodie spat. Heco nodded his head. Rachel was supposed to make things better, now she was going to make things worse on herself and maybe everyone else.

* * *

"I want to know everything! I want to know when he stops to take a fuckin' piss!" Billy's voice echoed in the hall of the abandoned hospital. Spink and Dog stared back at a overly anxious and pacing Billy. He had been ranting for over an hour making phone calls to all his connections to find out more about Matt. He was sending them on a mission to follow Rachel and her 'friend'. "I'll send Joe and Bodie out to do your corner tonight. I need her to know I'm not fuckin' around!" Billy dug his hand into his jean pocket and ripped out his pack of cigarettes. He placed one in between his tightly pinched lips and lit it. He inhaled deeply closing his eyes. He could feel the presence of the two men he sent out. Snapping his eyes open again he looked at them. "Fuckin' go!" He yelled. Spink and Dog looked at each other then turned. They headed out of the old asylum angry that they had to waste their time chasing after some girl Billy apparently wasn't over.

"This is fuckin' bullshit yeah?" Spink said as he climbed into his van. Dog slid into the seat next to him nodding his head in agreement.

"Nothing we can do. Besides, I'd rather be here then workin' tonight." Spink pulled out into the street and headed into town. He didn't even know where to begin. She could be anywhere.

"Billy's real crazy over this one huh?" Dog asked as he lit the joint he had just rolled.

"Yeah, never seen him pay this much attention to a skirt before." Spink said looking around as he drove slowly through the streets.

"That's good I guess."

"Good for fuckin' who Dog?" Spink barked. Billy having a girlfriend just brought more anger into his life, which brought more misery into theirs. "He's a jealous prick as it is, now he's got this girl he goes crazy over, out with another guy. Who you think he's gonna take his anger out on, huh?" Dog shrugged his shoulders as he leaned back and inhaled. "Where the fuck is this girl?" Spink yelled. He was a grown man for Christ sake. He shouldn't be following her around. There were more important things to do.

"Joe told Billy they went out to eat." Dog said through a yawn. Spink knew this would be a long shot, but he made his way to Huntington Ave. Rachel came from an upscale part of LA. Spink knew she wouldn't be eating anywhere near where they lived. He made his way out of the city and closer and closer to the better parts of Boston.

Huntington Ave. was filled with people. Some stores were still open and the night life had just begun. They drove slowly up and down the avenue checking for Rachel's truck. There was no luck. He knew if he went back with no information Billy's fist would most likely introduce itself to his jaw.

"God damn!" Dog said with excitement. "This place is filled with hot girls." Dog sat up and looked out the side window. "Look at that one!" He yelled as he pointed at a girl in and extremely short skirt. Spink looked over checking the girl out. They slowed down pulling up to the curb. Dog rolled down his window quickly, licking his lips while he eyed the girls backside.

"Hey sweetheart." He hollered. The girl turned around noticing the man that was gawking back at her. She made a disgusted face then rolled her eyes. She turned back around to continue her conversation. Spink laughed at Dogs turn down. His laughter faded as his eyes fell on someone that resembled Rachel. He squinted his eyes trying to focus. They widened when he noticed the man sitting across from her grabbing her hand. He put his foot on the gas, making Dog curse.

They were sitting outside in front of a small Italian restaurant. Rachel was smiling and paying full attention to her company when Spink pulled up. She looked over noticing the familiar van. Her smile faded when the faces of the two men were clear to her. Matt stopped talking and followed her gaze. The men were parked at the curb looking back at them. His back straightened as he gave them a hard stare. There was no intimidating him, not by anyone. Matt was always the one doing the intimidating. His jaw tightened as his temper began to rise.

"Can I help you?" Matt asked with annoyance in his voice. Rachel's head shot over, her eyes widened at him as she reached over and grabbed his arm.

"Matt please," She begged. She knew Spink and Dog were no match to Matt, but after they had their asses handed to them Billy would come looking for him and Rachel couldn't bear to see that happen. Matt ignored her as he turned his body to face them.

"Do I know you?" Matt cocked his head to the side clearly irritated by the fact these guys were interrupting his time with Rachel. Dog leaned out of the open window, his arms folded on the door, his face serious.

"No…but your girl knows exactly who we are." He looked over at Rachel deepening her anger. Matt glanced over at her with a questioning look.

"They're Billy's friends." Rachel shook her head lightly in annoyance then looked back at Billy's boys. Dog and Spink were both staring at Matt, trying their hardest to get him to budge. But Matt stood there looking back with a small smile on his face. In another time Matt and Billy could have been friends. Maybe even twins.

"We'll be seeing you two _real _soon." Dog said as Spink slowly pulled away.

"Looking forward to it." Matt said his smile spreading. Dog eyed him as Spink drove down the block. Rachel sighed as she dropped her head in her hands.

"Why are you getting yourself upset. You know they don't scare me." Matt said as he leaned over to finish his food. Rachel sighed again as she looked at him.

"I know. Those two don't scare me either. But Billy," She leaned back in her seat and shook her head. She didn't want to think of what Billy was capable of doing. "Can we go please." She didn't feel like eating anymore. Matt nodded as he rose from his seat. He didn't want to leave but he knew she did. He wanted to make her feel comfortable and relaxed.

"So, you wanna go home?" He asked as he walked next to her. She crossed her arms over her chest pulling tightly at herself. Her head was down slightly looking at the floor as she walked. She didn't want to go home, but she didn't feel like sitting at that restaurant anymore.

"Can we just…walk?" A walk felt like a good idea. She could blow of some of the steam that had risen up in her body. Who the hell did Billy think he was? He treated her like she meant nothing to him when she knew he needed her the most. What other option did she have other then to leave? Now that she came back, back to be with a man she should never have involved herself with in the first place. A man who didn't deserve her time. But she came back to be with him and he pushed her away. Sleeping around behind her back like she meant nothing. She looked up at Matt giving him a small smirk as her guilt penetrated through her body. She knew what she did was wrong but at the time it felt right. She was wrong for laying down with someone else, but she didn't sleep with Billy's enemy. He, on the other hand purposely gave himself to the only person Rachel ever hated.

"You wanna talk about it?" Matt asked as he smiled at her.

"What is there to talk about?" she threw her arms to her sides. "I rushed back here to be with him. To fix what has happened between us and he tells me he wants nothing to do with me. But the second he sees me with someone of the opposite sex he sends his army to swarm in on me." Rachel let out a heavy grunt that she learned from Billy. She had picked up several of his traits as they're relationship progressed.

"He's being selfish. You deserve better." Matt exclaimed. He needed her to stop beating herself up over this. Billy didn't want her anymore, he just didn't want anyone else having her. Something he himself could understand. She was his once and knowing she was with someone else, after all this time was eating him up inside.

"I just…," her voice trailed off not sure if she wanted to speak out loud what she was thinking. She missed Billy. The more she saw him the more she missed him. She missed his smile, his face, his scent. She missed his irritating attitude when he was mad. She even missed the angry glare he gave when he didn't get his way with her. She missed everything. Why would she miss someone who only cared for himself? It was absurd but she couldn't help it. She was in love with him. "…never mind." She shook her head clearing her thoughts. Matt was the last person she wanted to talk to about how she felt. He wouldn't understand. He didn't like Billy or anyone he associated with. He was going to make matters worse for her. She was happy she had people who cared for her, but if she was going to have even a fraction of a chance of getting Billy back, he needed to go back home.

"You know what," she sighed as she stopped walking "I want to go home." Matt nodded his head in agreement. He didn't want to take a walk in the first place and after their little visit at the restaurant he didn't want to give opportunity to pump into anymore of Billy's goons.

They drove home with little conversation. Matt driving, Rachel slumped into the passengers seat, her head leaning against the window as she thought about what to do next. Billy wasn't like other guys. Even Matt would be easier to get back. Even if Billy decided to be with her again, was she really sure she wanted to. Confusion congested her brain as they pulled into a parking spot in front of her apartment building. Rachel climbed out of the truck and walked quickly to her apartment. Matt was behind her looking around. He could see the white van parked at the entrance of the parking lot. He waved and smiled before he disappeared into the building.

* * *

"That prick! Billy's gonna fuckin' kill him once he gets a hold of him." Spink said as he walked with little patience through the halls of the asylum. Dog trailed along behind him not interested to see Billy's reaction to Rachel's friends sarcasm. "He better not let this one slide for some piece of ass." They walked into a large room filled with hanging baskets. This was where they cooked their supply. Spink stopped, placing both hands on his hips. He looked over at Joe and Bodie who were counting wads of cash.

"Where the fuck is Billy?" Spink asked.

"Where do you think he is?" Joe asked a cigarette hanging from his mouth. Sometimes he looked just like his brother.

"Well I'm not fuckin' botherin' him there, you go get him." He demanded Joe. Joe smirked.

"Your crazy if you think I'm going in there when he's like that." Joe jumped off the table he was sitting on. "I worked your corner, got rid of all my shit. When I'm done counting my money I'm the fuck out of here." Joe turned back to counting his money. Spink took a few steps closer.

"I know you have a soft spot for that whore your brother used to fuck, but you need to get him and let him know I need to fuckin' talk to him about her!" Joe's jaw clenched as he lifted his eyes. He didn't sit back and listen when his brother talked about Rachel with disrespect. He voiced his opinion and said his peace and to him his brother had his rights to say what he wanted, the girl was the first girl he ever cared about. But Spink, hell he had no right to talk about the whores that worked the corner of his block. Joe turned and looked at Spink with a small smirk.

"You know, I think I will get him. And you can let him know about his "whore" as you like to call her." Spink didn't feel like getting a broken jaw, instead he huffed and walked past Joe and Bodie and headed to the one place he knew Billy would be. The only place he ever went to when he needed to get away, or plan.

Spink stood peering through the slightly ajar chapel door. He could see Billy sitting in the first row, his head leaned back. He couldn't see his face, couldn't make out his mood. There was no turning back, he needed to tell Billy that intimidating this Matt character was going to be a useless game. Something more concrete needed to be done.

Pushing the door slightly open Spink held his breath. Billy had always since they were kids been a ticking time bomb just waiting for the perfect moment to explode. He would take any one of them out if he ever felt it necessary enough. His father, the fat guzzling gun salesmen, made him the brutal heartless killing machine he was when things didn't go right. No one ever wanted to make him mad, or disappoint him. Physically, mentally and emotionally he was stronger then any of them and they knew it. As he pushed the door open getting ready for whatever mood Billy was in it made a creaking noise sending Billy's entire body turning around. They stared at each other for a few seconds before Billy sniffed and shifted his body.

"Well?" He barked.

"We found them." Billy stood up slowly preparing himself. "They were on Huntington. And that Matt guy," Spink sighed "he isn't afraid of us." Billy crossed his arms over his chest. Putting his head down to the floor he smiled. A smile Spink knew well. Billy enjoyed the chase. Letting the opponent think they have a chance is a little game he liked to play. He wasn't really planning on killing Matt. There was no pleasure in that. But hurting him, letting him know never to look at Rachel again, that would be enough gratification. But if things got bad, ending his life wouldn't put a damper on his day. Billy's eyes raised to Spink, the smile still across his lips.

"You did good." Billy reached over grabbing his leather jacket, he started for the door. "Let's get drunk." His smile turning into a sly smirk. He knew he had Rachel right where he wanted her. Wondering. Matt would soon enough know the effects Billy had on people.

* * *

They arrived at the bar not long after they left the office. Joe had decided to tag along instead of going home for the night. Billy was in a good mood this night and everyone savored it. The bar was filled with laughter and hollering has the men shared their stories. Billy watched as his younger brother has his shots, singing along to some song on the radio.

"What do you wanna do for you birthday?" Billy asked smirking, already knowing the answer. Joe picked up his shot glass and downed it. He looked over at his brother, smirking back as he lit a cigarette.

"I think you know." Joe's sly smile let the rest of the crew know what he was thinking.

"Sassy Red's!" Bodie hollered in a deep voice. The men went crazy knowing they would be spending a night at the only strip joint they ever graced their presence.

"So Red's it is. I'll call Derek tomorrow letting him know we'll need the place to ourselves." Billy winked at Joe. Joe's smile slightly faded.

"My girl's gonna come." A few of the guys made annoyed groans. Joe looked around shaking his head. "Don't be fuckin' jealous cause I got something as fine as Nicole to be by my side, while all you asshole got nothing." His finger waved around the table and stopped at Billy. Joe put his hand down quickly removing his eyes from his brother's stare. He looked back at the guys and laughed. "She's fuckin' comin'!"

A few hours passed and the boys were all drunk and starting to act stupid. Bodie and Tommy had words over a pool game and wrestled each other until Billy broke them up. Baggy was having a fit over some girl he was recently banging and left. Later, Tommy had passed out on one of the tables while Heco and Billy sat together drinking some more. Joe had used his cell outside to call Nicole. When he came back in and slid across from Billy, his head was back and his eyes closed while Joe looked at him. Billy felt his presence and his stare.

"What?" Billy's voice was deep as he spoke. His head still leaned back he asked again. "What?"

"We need to talk." Billy's head slowly went down his eyes opening. They revealed a tired very drunk Billy. He raised his eyebrows at Joe. Joe sighed knowing his brother wasn't going to like what he had to say. "I invited Rachel out with us for my birthday." Billy's expression didn't change. He just stared at his little brother then shifted his weight. He reached in his pocket and pulled out his cigarettes. He lit one then threw the pack on the table never taking his eyes off of Joe.

"No." Billy said flatly. He took his glare from his brother and looked over at the TV behind the counter. Nothing of interest was on but he'd rather that the hurt expression his brother wore.

"It isn't up to you." Joe replied. Billy ripped the cigarette from his mouth and shot his attention back to his brother.

"What?" He said his eyes glaring at Joe.

"It's my birthday, and I want her there."

"Why?"

"Because she's my friend. My girls best friend." Joe leaned back crossing his arms over his chest he shrug his shoulders. 'Why should it matter anyway. You don't care about her anymore. When Billy Darley is done with someone, he done. Her presence shouldn't bother you." Joe knew he was testing his boundaries but he didn't care. Billy's eyes scanned his brother's face knowing he wasn't backing down. He didn't want her there, the thought of her mere presence was making his blood boil. How could he stand being near her for all those hours? But it would keep her away from Matt.

"Fine." He spat. Billy rose from his feet, staggering to the door. Joe followed and grabbed the keys from his brother's hand. He was drunk but no where near of what Billy was. He wasn't going to push the issue of Rachel coming because he knew she wouldn't show. She shouldn't show if she knew what was good for her. A mischievous smirk rose on his lips as ideas ran through his head.

* * *

"Get up!" Nicole rushed into Rachel's room, throwing the covers off of her bed. She had argued with Joe all day about going out tonight. She didn't want to be put in that type of situation. Knowing well what would be in store for her if she did. Matt sat in the living room, a angry expression across his face. When she had told him Joe invited her out for his birthday and that Billy would be there, he was angry to say the least. She told him she wasn't going and kept to her word. But Nicole wouldn't let it go. Neither would Joe. Joe had arrived at the apartment to try one more time to convince Rachel to come. He had bumped into Mike and Daniela inviting them to his party at the well known strip club. Daniela was excited never being to such a trashy. Mike even more excited because he had. Knowing more then one of her close friends would be there should have been a way to get her to stop being a child and get dressed. Joe's wishful thinking didn't come that easily.

"You two, get out!" Rachel leaned on her elbow and pointed at the door. Giving Nicole and Joe stern looks, her nostrils flared. Joe stood taller and crossed his arms over his chest. Nicole stood her hands on her hips as she glared at Rachel.

"Fine! If your not going, then I'm not going." She threw her hands down and stormed out of the room. Joe watched her as she left then turned to Rachel. She threw her head into her pillow and growled. Joe smirked at the sound. Rachel's voice was muffled by the pillow as she spoke.

"What?" Joe asked leaning closer to her. Rachel raised her head not looking at Joe.

"Why did you have to invite me?" She sighed and rolled off the bed. She walked to her door Joe following.

"Because you're my friend, and I wanted you to be there to celebrate with me. Is that a fuckin' crime now." Rachel stopped and turned to him. He was so different from his brother when it came to emotions. This guy had a heart and cared about people. Rachel smiled lightly at him then turned back around.

"Nicole," she yelled "I'll go, ok?" She walked into the living room and stopped. Nicole was sitting on the couch with Matt a childish pout on her lips. Matt tried his hardest not to show his true emotions. "I said, I'll go." Nicole jumped off the couch and grabbed Rachel's hand. She walked them to her room and closed the door leaving Matt and Joe alone. They glanced at each other once then looked away.

"You _have _to look hot tonight." Nicole smirked as she raided Rachel's closet. Rachel threw herself onto her bed again, sighing as she stared at the ceiling.

"This is going to be bad." She whispered. Nicole ignored her.

"Oh," Nicole grabbed a shirt Rachel forgot she had. It wasn't too racy but it was enough for her. A tight black collared short sleeved shirt with lace and buttons at the bust, a ribbon belt at the empire waist was exactly the shirt that would grab attention from any guy. Especially Billy. "yes, this!" she held the shirt in front of her then stopped to think. She smiled then ran in her room. She came back a minute later with a dark denim skirt she had borrowed from Rachel. "This would go great with that shirt, and wear your black boots. You know, the ones that go almost to your knee." Nicole was more excited then she was. "Do your eyes smoky. I know someone loves when your eyes look like that." This sparked Rachel's attention.

"Really?" She asked sitting up. Nicole looked over at her and smiled.

"Yeah, he told Joe." Nicole laughed a little. "He said something about when your eyes were done like that they looked like 'fuck me' eyes." Rachel's jaw dropped to the floor. Her cheeks hinted her embarrassment. "He also said, and I quote, "I want to grab her fuck her brains out." Rachel's confidence was a little higher after hearing that. She stood up and grabbed the shirt. Placing it in front of her chest she looked at herself in the mirror.

"This shirt shows too much boobs." Rachel said as she eyed herself.

"Then button the last button, please Rachel…since when are you such a friggin prude?" They both laughed at Nicole's statement. Rachel sighed handing Nicole back the shirt.

"I'll go shower."

Rachel took her time showering, thinking of every possibility the night would bring. Billy had been ok with her coming out, but why? Was his hatred towards her subsiding? Or was this a mere ploy to hurt her more? The chances of her and him being together were slim, this she knew. But the idea of them being together again made tonight suddenly worth it. She closed her eyes as she let the water rush over her face. She breathed slightly through her mouth enjoying the relaxing feeling. Billy was the only images her mind would let her see when she closed her eyes. Mostly, her stomach would hurt trying to erase him from her thoughts, but tonight, right now her stomach didn't hurt. Butterflies fluttered roughly, enhancing her new excitement. If Nicole's plan was going to work, even if it was to get Billy thinking of her again, it was worth the effort. She shut the water and grabbed a towel. She wanted to get ready and go enjoy her night out. Hopefully, Billy would enjoy seeing her.

* * *

Rachel sat in the back seat of Mike's car talking to Nicole and Daniela. Her eyes done exactly how Billy liked, her hair hanging down her back in loose waves, she looked incredible. Mike did a double take when she walked outside to meet them. She decided on leaving the last button open. No harm is showing a little extra skin.

"Rachel, my God your gorgeous. I mean we always knew this, but wow!" Daniela made her eyes pop at the last word. Mike looked at her through the rear view mirror then quickly back on the road. She did look amazing and she even knew it.

"So how are you two doing?" Rachel asked smirking at Daniela. "haven't seen you guys much, well since…" Rachel eyes dropped.

"We're great. Everything has been really good. Thank you Ray," She turned her body more and placed a hand on her friends knee. "for introducing me to this hot stud of a man." She laughed glancing at Mike. He had a huge smile across his face. Rachel looked at him through the mirror and smiled. "I'm happy you guys are together."

"Ok, here we are." Nicole said looking out the window. Mike pulled into the parking lot and found a spot. There weren't tons of cars like he was used to, but he knew the owner had closed it off from the public tonight for Joe's birthday.

"Everyone's here." Nicole said as she climbed out of the car. Rachel followed her on her side and slowly climbed out of the car. She was starting to feel a rush of panic as she stood up and straightened her skirt. Daniela walked over to her and fluffed her hair for her.

"You look beautiful." Daniela pulled some hair over her shoulder. "If he doesn't drag you by your hair to his bed tonight, then I think he's starting to play for a different team." Daniela said with seriousness. Rachel laughed shaking her head.

"Well," Rachel sighed deeply "It's now or never." They walked to the entrance, Rachel stopping one more time for one more deep breath before entering. The place was dark with some colored lights shining from the ceiling. Loud rock music was being played, reminding her of the Four Roses. A large stage covered the middle of the room. Around the stage was a bar that went completely around. The bouncer at the front door stopped them, stamping their hands with a florescent ink. Rachel stood at the end of the line of her friends not wanting to be the first person Billy and his friends saw. Rachel looked up on the stage as the passed it. Girls in only g-string's danced slowly as if in some altered state. One of the girls was lying on her back her legs straight up in the air making them move in a scissor motion. There were people at the bar, dirty horny men watching this girl as her womanly parts were being exposed, teasing the men for more money.

"I thought this place was cut off for the night to the public?" Mike asked Nicole.

"It was, but some of these guys Joe knows come here every night, so he let them stay." She blushed as one of the girls on stage smiled down at her. They made their way to the back of the club noticing Joe right away. Nicole smiled and walked a head of them. Joe noticed his girl and smiled, grabbing her in a hug he kissed her.

"You made it." He said looking behind Nicole. "Where's…"

"She's here." Nicole smiled. "and wait till you see her." Joe's eye brows narrowed as he looked for her. Suddenly Rachel came into view. She was practically hiding behind Mike. Joe's eyes widened at the site of her. She was always something to stare at but tonight she was gorgeous.

"Is this my gift?" he asked Nicole staring at Rachel. He reached out grabbing her in a hug. She could smell the whiskey already, the aroma penetrating off of his clothes. He let her go and looked over at Nicole. Her small pout he knew wasn't in seriousness. "No?" He asked her. "Damn!" Nicole punched Joe in the belly making him lean over and laugh.

"Don't be a jerk, it's your birthday." She smiled. Daniela and Mike said their hello's and happy birthday then walked passed him to say hello to the rest of the crew. Joe looked over at Rachel who was clearly uncomfortable.

"Thanks for coming out tonight." He smiled.

"Thanks for wanting me here, and Happy Birthday."

"C'mon, lets sit." He turned and walked over to the several tables that were set up for them, the girls following. There was well over 30 people there, faces Rachel had never seen before. Girls in shorter skirts then she wore were sitting on tables, drunk already. Billy's boys were all laughing and drinking and having their fun with some strippers that had come to make some money. She looked up seeing Tommy leave with one of them up a small flight of stairs.

"That's where the real fun is." A deep husky voice said from behind her. Rachel held her breath. She looked straight ahead not wanting to face him. He was so close she could feel him. Nicole looked between Rachel and the person behind her several times. Joe doing the same. Finally Rachel turned staring into the eyes she had missed so much. His hard glare she turned to see softened for a second when he looked back into hers. His jaw clenched, his lips pursed as he moved himself passed her, their faces only inches apart. He made his way back to the seat he had been occupying before his departure.

"Damn! Why the fuck must you make yourself even hotter then you are?" Bodie yelled as he came walking down the stairs Tommy had just went up. Bodie's eyes were fixed on Rachel smiling a drunken smile. She smiled lightly at him as he made his way to her. He grabbed her into a big hug lifting her off the floor. He closed his eyes as he held her.

"I'm sorry." He whispered in her ear. "I didn't know," he sighed "he would do this to you." Rachel sunk into their embrace, feeling a bit better knowing his intensions were for her also. He placed her back on the floor and bent back from her looking her up and down. He spun her slightly checking out the back of her. "You got some ass girl." He yelled. Rachel turned quickly smiling wide, her cheeks a deep pink.

"Come sit." Nicole grabbed her hand laughing at Bodies slight flirtation. She pulled her to a empty seat next to Daniela. Mike was sitting with Billy and Joe in deep conversation, not noticing the girls that were pouring themselves around them. Nicole winced seeing these girls but knew she had to behave tonight.

"So, that was weird." Nicole said looking over at Rachel. Rachel's eyes were sad. Nicole knew she needed to do something. "It's drinking time." She got up grabbed Rachel's hand and headed to the bar. Daniela followed looking forward to this part of the night. The bartender was about 25 and had a body to die for. Nicole smiled, a natural flirt that she was and asked for a vodka and cranberry for Rachel. Rachel waved her hand.

"No, you know what, I'll start with a shot." She smirked. "I'll have whatever you think is good." he smiled back at her his eyes giving off a twinkle. Daniela asked for the same so Nicole figured the night should start off with a shot then. The bartender handed them three shot glasses that were way bigger then Rachel had ever seen before. He poured Black Haus into each glass overflowing them. Rachel smiled knowing how much she loved Black Haus. The girls did their cheers and downed the burning liquor leaving the cool burn in their mouths. They all laughed and decided to have another. Rachel was feeling the two shots within seconds. The warm feeling caressing her body from the inside out. She was no longer feeling shy and was now feeling great.

"So," she leaned over the counter getting a closer look at the hunk bartender. "What's your name?" She gave him her best smile, showing her dimples. He smiled back showing a dimple of his own. His eyes fell to the glass he was drying his smile deepening.

"Sweetheart, those boys over there have a better chance of landing me then you do." He laughed looking back at her. Rachel's eyes widened as her smile opened making her mouth form an o shape. The girls started laughing as Rachel covered her mouth.

"It's always the hot ones!" Rachel pouted a small smirk still on her face. He leaned closer to her smiling wide, flashing a set of pearly whites.

"For the record, if I became straight…you'd be the first I'd come to." He winked. Rachel blushed as a smile spread across her face. She bit her bottom lip feeling even more flirty then before. The girls ordered themselves another round of shots and a round of Vodka and Cranberry. They took the shots, winked at the hot gay bartender, then headed back to their seats. Mike was sitting with Joe at their seats eyeing the freshly buzzed girls. Billy's guys were eying Rachel with lust in their eyes as she walked to her seat. They quickly looked away any time Billy caught them. Rachel smiled knowing this night would be in her favor. Or so she thought.

The night had moved on smoothly for Rachel. Billy gave his cold stares and glances as often as he could. He had left several times with the same stripper and coming back with a stupid grin on his face each time. Rachel didn't even want to know what he was doing with her, but she knew it wasn't good. It wasn't going to bother her though. She was having a great night and she was feeling just as good. Tommy made his comments, talking about parts of her body that he shouldn't even be looking at. Billy not showing a drop of jealousy as his boys, one by one hit on her. That made a knot in her gut but she refused to show it. Songs she loved were playing on the highly hung speakers all night. One song in particular would play, getting Rachel in the mood to dance. Bodie had walked past her headed to the bar when he looked down at Rachel, seeing a bit more then he expected.

"You should put those away." Bodie leaned down, one hand on her chair, the other on the table. He nodded towards her chest. She looked down noticing her cleavage was out way more then she ever wanted. She smiled as she buttoned that last button back up.

"Sorry." she laughed.

"I'm not." He smirked at her eying her up and down. If Rachel was sober she would have felt uncomfortable having Bodie of all people look at her like that. But how she was feeling, anyone could have hit on her and made her feel giddy. Rachel's eyes widened as a song she loved blasted on the radio. She jumped up and grabbed Bodie's hand.

"Dance with me please." She wined. He smiled and followed her to the small area next to them. Bodie's hands fell to her hips as she moved. She closed her eyes and let the beat take her over. The two of them moved together perceptively having most of the party look their way. Rachel turned around her back against his chest as she moved. Bodie's face feel serious as he felt her move. He watched every inch of her body align with the music. His heart began to race as he felt the bottom of his stomach burn. He leaned his head forward, his mouth at the nape of her neck. He didn't realize what he was doing until it was already done. He pushed her away slightly, not wanting to gather anymore unwanted attention. Nicole saw this and looked back at Billy. She was hoping he didn't see but he did. His eyes were cold and glazed over. His face red with anger. The quick air from his nose was sending the smoke from his cigarette in different directions. Rachel stood dumfounded as she watched Bodie walk quickly to the bar. She looked back at Nicole with a questioning glare.

"What happened?" She asked as her eyes rose to see Billy's. Something she saw as innocent was no so much to Billy. She couldn't help the smirk she gave him as she sat down. Someone had finally made him jealous. Bodie didn't look at her as he walked passed her carrying two drinks back to his seat with Billy. Billy's eyes showed his annoyance as Bodie stood staring back.

"It was nothing dog." Bodie said lightly laughing as he nodded towards Rachel. Everyone was watching now as these two talked. Billy's hard look softened to a more sarcastic one.

"Well," his eyebrows raised and his hand gestured along with the word. He leaned forward as he took his cigarette from his mouth. "You can have my fuckin' sloppy seconds if you want Bode." He smirked "Just warning you, it aint that great." Rachel's face dropped as Billy began his abuse on her. Bodie looked back at her his eyes apologizing. The girls that were at Billy's table all giggled and looked at Rachel like she was a joke. Normally Rachel would have snapped back with something equally offensive, but she couldn't. The feeling of hurt had overcome her will to piss him off. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat as Joe leaned forward.

"You pissed him off, that's all. Don't let it get to you." He whispered. Rachel looked over at him a small smile left just as quick as came. She blinked her eyes quickly trying to push away the premature tears that were forming. She couldn't cry. Not here. Not in front of them.

"What?" Billy's voice broke her thoughts. She looked back over at him smiling up at Bodie. "You can have her bro," a smug expression across his face "I'm fuckin' done with that bitch." She couldn't stand it anymore. She rose out of her seat slowly. The last thing she needed was to lose her balance and fall. Before she started to cry or show any emotion from his words she headed to the bathroom. She was feeling dizzy from the major consumption of alcohol she had over the night. She flung the door open walking straight to the sink. She turned cool water on and patted her face with it. She felt like she was on fire. Why did she come out? She shouldn't have let them talk her into this. This man that was outside was not the same man who vowed to protect her, to love her and never hurt her. He was a monster. The door squeaked as she looked into the mirror seeing Nicole and Daniela standing behind her.

"I'm sorry." Nicole said.

"Don't be." Rachel dried her face with a napkin and stood up. She fixed her hair and straightened her clothes as she tried to calm down.

"What's his problem?" Daniela said walking into one of the stalls. "It's obvious he still has feelings for you or he wouldn't be going out of his way to be a prick." She yelled through the closed door.

"It doesn't matter." Rachel sighed. "It doesn't matter anymore." She wiped some stray makeup from under her eyes.

"Even after all that drinking, dancing and almost crying…you still look amazing." Nicole said putting her hand on her shoulder. Rachel huffed through her nose smiling. "You have to come back out. You can't sit in here all night."

"I know. I just needed to get out of there. Those girls just sat there laughing at me, and Billy…" Rachel bit the inside of her cheek, trying not to cry. Daniela joined them, washed her hands then grabbed Rachel by the arm.

"Let's go. And one more of those bitches make one noise towards you I'm knocking them out." Rachel smiled as she was brought back out into the club. They walked past the bartender who winked at her. She gave him a thank you smile then headed back to her seat. The men were louder then before talking about God knows what. Billy noticed her before she sat down. He couldn't help but look at her. She did look amazing, her eyes having that same look he used to love. Her shirt showing what he used to own. His anger grew again as he looked at her. She looked at him, their eyes locking for several seconds. She looked hurt, but he didn't care.

A tall blonde in a black mini dress walked past Rachel. The dress she wore looked as if it was painted on. She walked straight to Billy bending in to kiss him on the cheek. He smirked as his eyes left Rachel's and landed on the blonde. He kissed her back then rose to his feet. They walked away from the group of guys and headed to a corner. They started talking when Nicole smacked Joe in the head.

"What the fuck babe!" He yelled rubbing his head.

"Who the hell is that?" She pointed to Billy and his friend. Joe knew who she was talking about and didn't really want to get into it. He sighed leaning back in his chair.

"That's Bella. We've known her since we were little. She works here."

"How come I've never seen her before?" Rachel asked, almost sounding like a child. She couldn't keep her eyes off of them. This woman was really pretty. She had an amazing figure, long thick blonde hair, killer legs and big fake boobs. They were close to one another as they talked, turning her stomach.

"Never had a reason to talk to her." Rachel looked over at Joe. He couldn't handle the look on her face.

"I'm not feeling so good. I think I should leave." Rachel looked through her bag for her phone.

"I'll take you home." Mike said.

"No, no it's ok. I have a ride." She grabbed her phone and dialed her apartment.

"Ray?" Matt's voice sounded comforting on the other end.

"Can you come get me?" She had left him the direction to the club just incase things didn't go right. They were not feeling right at all.

"I'll be there in a few." She hung up her cell and placed it back in her bag. She looked up Billy's eyes on her. Her eyes could no longer focus. She could see his expression, filled with hate but it was fuzzy. But when he grabbed the blonde and kissed her, suddenly everything came into focus. She watched as Billy kissed her with hunger. His hand was behind her neck grabbing at her hair pulling her deeper into their kiss. She must have looked like she was going to pass out when Nicole yelled her name. She followed her gaze her eyes locking on Billy pressed up against the blonde. Nicole gasped making Joe look her way. He now followed her gaze, his head quickly snapping towards Rachel.

"Ray," he jumped out of his seat and leaned next to her. "Ray!" She shook her head lightly her eyes swelling up with tears. She looked horrified. Knowing he was with Jessica, and maybe others was one thing. But to actually see him practically about to have sex in front of her was making her paralyzed. Her stomach was twisting, she felt like she was going to throw up.

"I have to go." She whispered as she rose to her feet. Her eyes never leaving them. The girls hands were now all over his body, pulling at his shirt touching him everywhere. Rachel pulled her eyes off of them and looked at Joe. "Thank you, for…asking me to come tonight. I really did have a good time, I just" she started to turn around "I have to go." Joe grabbed her arm begging her not to leave. She turned back her eyes pouring the tears she could no longer control. She wasn't looking at Billy anymore as she sobbed in front of Joe. Billy broke away from Bella, his breathing heavy. That would teach Rachel to fuck with him. Bella was a good friend and always there when he needed her.

"Thanks." He whispered in her ear.

"You owe me." She whispered back. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a tiny blue ziplock bag. A white substance was packet inside. He slipped it between her breasts and smiled. "You know Billy, my girlfriend isn't going to be too happy when she hears I made out with you." Her voice still low.

"Tell her it was for a good cause." She winked at him and looked towards the girl she knew Billy was trying to infuriate. Her face dropped when she saw the tears. "Not too good sweat heart." She said nodding towards Rachel. Billy looked up seeing Rachel trying to leave. She was crying in a way Billy had never seen before. His face softened as he looked at her. She was hurt, more then he thought he could make her. Rachel finally turned and left leaving her friends behind. Billy watched as she walked out of the club, not sure if he should follow. Joe turned to look at his brother, Billy's expression was no longer cold. He sat back down at his chair, lighting another cigarette. He had gone too far this time. He knew it. His face didn't show what he had done was hurting him just as much as it was hurting her.

The air was freezing when Rachel opened the door and stepped out side. She threw her back against the wall of the club and put her head down. She cried like she had never cried for him before. Her stomach felt a pain she had never felt before. She couldn't control her breathing as she desperately tried to stop crying. He had made a fool out of her. Everyone witnessing what he had done. She tried her best to grab his attention the whole night. Only to have him lay his hands, his mouth on someone else. She only had her self to blame. She knew she should never have gotten involved with someone like him. But he made her feel something she never felt before.

Quickly she wiped the tears from under her eyes and took a few deep breaths. She couldn't let him get the best of her. Headlights drove into the parking lot as Rachel was composing herself. She looked up seeing Matt climb out of the front seat of her truck. He stopped suddenly seeing her face red and puffy. He narrowed his eyes as he looked at her, his jaw clenching as he made his way to her. She leaned her head back on the wall and closed her eyes.

"What happened?" His voice was deep and angry. Rachel shook her head not wanting to relive that last moment. He grabbed her arm gently making her look at him. "What the fuck did he do?"

"I don't want to talk about it." She starting crying again. Matt took a step closer to her.

"Let's go." He whispered. She nodded her head and followed him to her truck. He opened the passenger side door for her, she stopped before she climbed in.

"Matt," She looked up at him. "Thank you." She put her arms around him, hugging him tight. Matt hugged her back, closing his eyes. She smelt so good, even after being in that dump for the past few hours. He could feel her crying again and wished she would stop. He knew she was crying over him. It had to be because of him. No one else would make her feel this way. He wanted to be angry still but having her in his arms was exactly what he wanted. She slightly pulled away looking up at him. She smiled uncomfortably, her eyes scanning his face. She wasn't sure if it was the fact that she was drunk or what Billy had done, but her thoughts escaped her as she grabbed his face and kissed him.

It was deep this kiss they were sharing. Deep, sensual and hungry. She stumbled back against her truck, hitting hit hard. Matt right along with her. His body pressed up against hers, his hands at her thighs rising up. Moans escaped her throat as a new feeling of wanting him in her bed burst through her body. Matt's hands went to the back of her neck pulling her deeper into the kiss. Her body was feeling numb as her head spun. Billy was now her past. He made that very clear tonight. Now, in the present all she wanted was to leave and be with Matt. How quickly your mind changes when your heart has been crushed.

* * *

Billy sat alone staring at nothing. His eyes were getting more heavy as tired feelings crept up on him. He grabbed the shot glass Bodie had given him before he went off to get another freebie. He slowly drank the liquid letting it burn his throat. His face twisted from the pain as he placed the glass back down. He grabbed another cigarette lighting it longer then it needed. He scanned the room watching his crew as they had their fun. Strippers danced all around Joe as Nicole looked away most likely thinking of the same person he was. She had made it a point to get his attention tonight, that was clear. She wore a skirt, the one that showed how long and perfect her legs were. Her eyes, when they looked at him sent chills of lust threw his belly. But his pride was stopping him from grabbing her and taking her back to his place, showing her, making her feel how much he wanted her. He had stayed clean from drugs since she had been back, but that was the only thing he let change. Now at this very moment he wanted something else to change. He wanted her again. At his side. His own and no one else's. Billy grabbed the cigarette from his mouth smashing the head down hard into the ashtray. He rose from his seat grabbing his coat. After he found her he wasn't planning on coming back in.

Joe watched from the corner of his eye as his brother made his way to the door opening it quickly. He smiled, then looked at Nicole. She had also seen Billy wondering to herself, what was he going to do? Did he leave to get her, or to fight with her. She rose from her seat, Joe grabbing her hand and shaking his head.

"Don't!" He demanded. "Stay out of this. You know how my brother is."

"But what if him going out there isn't a good thing Joe?" Nicole said as she sat back down, her eyes still on the door.

"And what if it is. Maybe he isn't even going for her, he could just be leaving." Joe waved the girls around him away. He leaned to his girl and smiled. "I could see it in his face he knew he was wrong. He'll never admit it, but he knows." Nicole looked back at Joe concern still in her eyes.

"Joe," she sighed "She called Matt to get her." Joe's smile fell. He leaned back in his chair.

"Great." He sighed.

* * *

Billy couldn't see her at first, but as his eyes scanned the parking lot the two figures behind and open car door grabbed his attention. He squinted his eyes trying to focus. He started to shake, his anger now getting the best of him. No thoughts crossed his mind as he stormed over to the couple. He had come after her to claim back what was his, to apologize without speaking a word to her. He wanted his girl back, and he wasn't going to let Matt stand in the way.

Rachel's eyes widened as Matt was pulled away from her. She didn't see Billy at first, her confusion setting in as Matt was turned around. She looked to the side, Billy's face in full view. He didn't look at her, his eyes fixed on Matt. The two men stood nose to nose, Billy's breathing erratic. Every inch of her trembled as she took a step back. These two fighting would be like an atomic bomb exploding.

"What the fuck do you think your doing touching what's mine?" Billy said in a low harsh voice, his teeth tightly pressed together as he spoke. Rachel's eyes widened, her face filled with total shock at his statement. Matt stood taller, a smirk playing across his lips.

"Doesn't look like she belongs to you anymore." Matt's tone mocking Billy. The whites of Billy's eyes were replaced with red. The beautiful blue/green color Rachel had loved so much now looked black. His eyes were dark with hate and anger. Rachel hadn't notice Billy's movement until his fist had connected with Matt's jaw. He stumbled back grabbing his jaw, his eyes not leaving Billy. He was pissed now for letting his guard down. He never did that before. He was always they one who was taking shots like that. He gave Billy a smirk letting him know his punch was cheap. He leaned over and charged straight for Billy, tackling him to the ground. Grunts and growls could be heard from the both of them as they wrestled on the floor, both men getting their fair shots in. Rachel's screams could be heard from inside the club sending Billy's crew straight for the door.

Rachel covered her mouth as she watched in horror as Billy's entire crew ran to Billy and Matt. Bodie had stood ahead of them, but him stopping anyone from interfering wasn't reassurance of Matt's safety. She knew as soon as they saw opportunity they would attack. Matt was strong, but he was no match to all of them at once. Billy was now on top of Matt throwing hard fierce punches to Matt's face sending blood flying out of his mouth. He reached back, now planting his fist across Billy's face. He knew he got a good hit when Billy fell back and off of him. The two men were breathing heavy as they both rose to their feet.

Billy spit blood on the floor, getting the horrible taste of his mouth. His eyes on Matt again, he saw red. He lifted his long leg and crashed his heavy foot into Matt's chest. Trying to breath, Matt stumbled back losing his balance sending him crashing to the floor again. Billy saw opportunity and dove on top of Matt wrapping his arm around Matt's neck. He bent him forward making it almost impossible to move. Billy's strength was powerful as he pulled tighter on Matt's neck. He was now no match to Billy. He was twisted under Billy, not being able to move out from the headlock that was now cutting his breathing. He wasn't going to give up, he couldn't give up. He knew Billy's crew was outside watching this battle and would take him out in a heart beat. If they were anything like they seemed, Matt would most likely be dead the second Billy got off of him.

"You gotta fuckin' do something Bode!" Joe yelled taking a small step forward. He knew he couldn't get his brother to stop, and he knew he needed to stop before he killed Matt. Bodie scrunched his face with annoyance.

"I ain't doin' fuckin' shit dog. That boy is getting' what the fuck he came for. A mother fuckin' beatin'." Bodie smiled crossing his arms over his chest. Joe looked up seeing Rachel, her face frozen in horror as she watched Billy slowly taking the life from Matt. She starting to scream for Billy to stop, but she knew Billy couldn't hear her. He only could feel what he was doing. And what he was doing, cutting the breathing from Matt, was sending exciting chills through his body. Billy's face was turning all shades of red, every vein in his neck and forehead were pulsating through his skin. Rachel watched Billy as his eyes rolled shut. He was crazy, she knew this but right now he had surpassed crazy and become something else.

"Bode, look at fuckin' Rachel!" Joe yelled pushing Bodie slightly to look in the direction he was pointing. Bodie sighed and looked up. The sight of her made him soften immediately. She had been through enough tonight. He growled under his breath as he took a few steps to Billy. The men were all hollering and cheering Billy to finish Matt off as Bodie stood over them. He looked over at Heco and nodded for him to help. The two men tried their best to loosen Billy's grip on Matt. They started yelling at him to let go, trying to snap him back into reality. Billy opened his eyes. They had become glassy and teary as they looked at Bodie.

"Let him go dog." Bodie yelled grabbing Billy's arm. "He aint fuckin' worth it man." Heco ran behind him throwing his arms under Billy's. He pulled with all his might as Bodie loosened Billy's grip. Billy growled like a beast as they pulled him off, falling back. Matt's coughs made it hard for him to catch his breath as he stood on his knees. Rachel without thought ran to Matt pulling him to her truck. Her head was spinning but she needed to get Matt out of there. Slowly Matt rose to his feet and took steps to Rachel's truck. If he would have loosened himself from his grip this fight would still be going on, and going on strong. Billy had paralyzed Matt, making it impossible to fight back.

Billy's eyes focused again as he pushed Heco off of him. He rose to his feet breathing erratically. Bodie grabbed his shirt pulling him back to the club. "It's done dog, he understands now." Bodie said. Billy looked around as he was being pulled, his eyes falling on Matt again. Rachel was consoling him, tending to him. Red covered his vision again as he broke free from Bodie and walked quickly to Matt. He reached behind his back grabbing the gun from his waist. They watched as he raised it to Matt, aiming it to his head. Rachel, without thought jumped in front of him looking right into Billy's eyes.

"Get the fuck out of the way." He bellowed. Rachel jumped at the sound of him. Her eyes swelled up with tears as she pushed Matt into her truck, her eyes never leaving Billy's. Joe and Bodie were at his side, trying to talk him into dropping the gun. His lips pursed tightly as he threw his head back, his eyes peering down at her. Bodie grabbed Billy by his shirt again pulling him back to the club. Joe was now in front of Billy trying to push him away. His brother was hard to budge on a normal day, but when he was like this, unresponsive to reason, he was a brick wall. Billy put the gun down as he walked backwards to the club watching every movement Rachel made. He almost killed her friend and didn't think of her once. Rachel shut the passengers side door then walked quickly to the drivers side. She shouldn't drive, but she had no choice. She would take it slow and pray to God no one else was on the road. She looked up one final time before leaving and could see Billy still looking at her as he was dragged through the door.

Rachel had made it safely back to her apartment. Once Matt had been able to breath right his anger got the best of him. He had screamed and cursed and punched the inside of her truck as she drove. Now they sat in her apartment in silence. An uncomfortable silence. She wanted him to go back home for a different reason now. For his safety. Billy was trying to kill him tonight and he wouldn't be done. Matt was Rachel's past and possible future in Billy's eyes and from his actions tonight, he needed to be removed from the picture. Rachel looked up slowly, her eyes meeting Matt's. He had been staring at her the entire time.

"You have to go back home." She said breathlessly as she started to cry. "You can't be here, I'm sorry, but…" Matt stood up quickly. He glared down at her, his face filled with anger.

"You still fucking want him?" Matt shouted. "Even after this." he pointed to his neck. Rachel stood up shaking her head.

"This has nothing to do with that. You need to leave Matt. I don't know what he'll do now." She wasn't lying. She didn't know what she felt for Billy right now. His words of her being his were stuck in her head, but right now she was more concerned about Matt's safety. She feared what Billy would do if he saw him again.

"Fuck him!" He yelled as he walked to the living room. He threw himself on the couch.

"You shouldn't have come here in the first place." She sat next to him her eyes dropping the heavy tears that filled them. "I love you for caring about me but it just caused more problems."

"Then maybe you shouldn't have kissed me." He hissed through clenched teeth. Rachel didn't have the energy to deal with his anger now. She climbed off the couch and headed to her room. She looked back at him before she entered her room. "I'm sorry Matt, for everything."


	19. Chapter 19

"Ms. Hedlund," the man at the head of the class said. He was tall and very thin with a thick mop of curly blond hair on his head. He wore an expensive pair of glasses that fell nice on his face. It was warm in the classroom, the teacher rolling his dress shirt to his forearms showing his skinny arms. He put his hands to his hips staring back at the girl who's attention was towards the window. She had been a good student so far, but the past few days it was as if she was in another world. Her grades had not slipped but her class participation had. He took a deep breath, as he leaned on one leg. Some students followed his gaze to the girl sitting in the middle of the class. "Ms. Hedlund." His voice louder then before. Rachel's attention was back to her teacher and the students that were looking her way.

"I'm sorry Mr. Lombardo," her cheeks turning a deep red as she looked down at her notes then back at her teacher. "Um…could you repeat the question?" her teacher looked back at her annoyed. He looked down at his watch and sighed.

"I would, but class is over." He looked back at the students as he gathered his things off of the desk. "I want everyone to finish reading their stories they were assigned." He looked over at Rachel. "And Ms. Hedlund, stay after class please." Rachel sighed as she stood up putting her books in her black message bag. The one thing she never had to do before was stay after class. But she knew she hadn't been paying attention. She slowly made her way down the stairs, passing fellow students gathering their things to leave for their next class. She stopped as she reached her teacher. He didn't look up at her as he began to talk.

"So, Ms. Hedlund," He started. His sigh was exaggerated as he stood straight looking down at her. "Is everything alright?" She gave him an uncomfortable smile.

"Yes, Mr. Lombardo. I'm sorry I just ah," she tried to think of anything other then the truth. "Well, I didn't get much sleep last night." Was all she could think to say. She couldn't tell him how she was miserable for her barely-there relationship with her father, or the fact that her roommate and best friend was hardly ever home leaving her alone in the apartment almost all the time. Or the one thing that was on her brain the most. Billy.

"Everyone has their bad times Ms. Hedlund. Everyone has there nights where they can't sleep or their moments when things don't go right. But we all come here and do what we need to do." He sighed crossing his arms over his chest. "You're a great student. Your one of my top students. Your grades are phenomenal, your test stores outstanding. But participation is a big part of your final grade. College is very different from high school, and I don't give more then a second chance."

"I'm sorry, I promise this won't happen again."

"I hope not." He gave her a small smile then nodded for her to leave. "Go ahead before your late to your next class." Rachel smiled and waved as she walked to the door. She headed to her next class her mind still dragging Billy into view.

The rest of the day went by slowly. Classes were the last thing on her mind, but she tried her hardest to focus. Mr. Lombardo was the only teacher that noticed her daydreaming. At the end of the last class she called Nicole, hoping that today she would be able to see her friend and get out of the house for awhile. After a few rings Nicole finally answered.

"Hey," Nicole said sounding annoyed.

"Hey stranger." Rachel said walking out of the school into the parking lot.

"Oh Ray, don't say that. I know I've been with Joe a lot but,"

"It's ok." Rachel interrupted. "I just wanted to know what your plans were for tonight?" There was silence on the other end. "Um, well I'm going to take that as you have plans."

"No," Nicole said. "no, I don't have plans. We'll do something." Rachel smiled.

"Ok. I'll see you at home then." Rachel hung up the phone and climbed into her truck. Over the past few months some things had started to look better for Rachel. She wasn't fighting with her father anymore. They didn't talk as much as they did but she knew eventually things would get better. Well, she hoped. Her father had told her he didn't trust her and he would need time to work that out. She understood. He asked if she was still seeing Billy and, again she lied. She told him they were together and things were good. He gave her a small smile happy at least that his daughter was being treated right. She didn't want to lie to him but she wasn't sure if she wanted to let him know what Billy had done. About the shooting, about her leaving for LA, or about her being attacked. It would cause more problems and arguments and she didn't need that.

When Rachel walked into her apartment a familiar smell passed through her nostrils. She stopped holding her breath. Closing her eyes tightly she almost prayed that the smell's owner was there. When she opened her eyes and saw Joe staring back at her, a stupid grin on his face, she sighed. Her shoulders dropped as she walked to the kitchen and set down her bag.

"What are you doing here?" She asked. Her tone visible to Joe she was disappointed. He walked over to her the grin getting larger.

"Expecting someone else?" He asked. She shook her head rolling her eyes. She hadn't seen Billy since the night he fought Matt. Matt had left the following day not saying much as she drove him to the airport. He had kissed her, that deep mesmerizing kiss before he left. She hasn't spoken to him since. Billy hadn't tried to see Rachel. He had his way of knowing everything without having to actually be there. Several times Rachel had seen one of Billy's boys outside of her job, or school. Mostly they were parked in front of her apartment seeing when she came and left. Over the past couple of weeks she would see less and less of their cars. Bumping into Bodie here and there and seeing Joe most of the time was the only links she had lately with Billy. It would explain her sudden brain fogs in school. She didn't think much of Billy, knowing she was on his mind enough to make his crew follow her. So far today, she hadn't seen one person up until now.

"Actually, yes. Where's Nicole?"

"She's still at work. She wanted me to break the news to you." He sat down at the kitchen table and looked at her. He knew she had been alone most of the time, not having a social life. He felt sorry for her, but he knew there was nothing he could do.

"What news?" She said sitting down.

"Your coming out with _us _tonight."

"Hell no!" She snapped. Joe's eyebrows rose. "The last time I went out with you I watched two of my ex boyfriends fight each other."

"And that was my fault?" he asked throwing his hands in the air.

"No, but going out with you means bumping into _him_." She sunk into her seat. She looked like a sad child.

"You won't bump into him, I promise." He leaned forward, his eyes showing his honesty. Rachel wouldn't take the chance. She got up and started for her room.

"Tell Nicole I'll see her tomorrow. I'm going to bed."

"Bed?" He turned to face her. "It's 4 o'clock."

"Yup." She said sarcastically. Joe watched her disappear into the hall. He heard her door shut as he sighed and reached for his phone. He called Nicole giving her the bad news.

* * *

Nicole sat on her bed, the paper in hand containing Ashlynne's phone number. She didn't want to go behind Rachel's back and call her, but she didn't know what else to do. It had been a week since the last time Rachel had tried to get Nicole to go out and since then they barely spoke. Nicole was trying to make everyone happy and exhausting herself in the interim. Joe needed to be at arms length to Billy at all times leaving Nicole only one option if she wanted to see Joe. Be there in arms length also. How could she have Rachel come out with Billy right there? It wasn't a moment she wanted to be in the middle of, let alone the reason it happened.

Nicole sighed as she picked up her cell phone. She dialed Ashlynne's number and held her breath. It rang a few times before her voice mail came on. She listened to the 10 seconds of music before she heard Ashlynne's voice. Nicole hung up the phone knowing she wasn't going to leave a message. She rose off of her bed and opened her door. "Better off." she said out loud. It was a sign her not answering and she was sticking to it. She would have to figure out a way to get Rachel back to her normal self, by herself. As she made her way to the kitchen her cell phone went off, the vibration penetrating through her hand. Figuring it was Joe she opened it without looking at the caller id.

"Hello." She said almost annoyed. She wasn't in the mood for Joe's whining about Billy, or his invites to sit with him under a bridge on her days off. She was expecting him to ask a million questions about how she sounded, instead she heard a girls voice.

"Um, who's this?" The girl asked. Nicole's eyebrows raised now interested in this phone call.

"Who the hell is this?" She was preparing herself for the one thing she always expected to happen. Joe is a Darley after all, and getting around was something they knew very well. It was only a matter of time before a girl called asking her if she knew were her boyfriend was the night before.

"Ah… well… you called me so who the hell is this?" Nicole's face scrunched in confusion. Then she recognized the voice. Even being the only person in the room her face turned pink.

"Ashlynne?"

"Yeah, who's this?" She was even more annoyed then before.

"I'm so sorry. This is Nicole, Rachel's friend. I didn't know who you were because," she sighed. "never mind."

"Nicole? Yes! Ok, I've heard so much about you. Wait," her voice trailed off. "Why are you calling me? Is she ok?" Ashlynne sounded frantic. She knew she never should have let her leave. What did Billy do to her?

"No, she's fine." Nicole could hear the sigh of relief on the other end of the phone. "It's just, well I know you know the whole situation and well, I can't get her out of this rut she's been in. She hates me right now I'm sure. But I thought calling you, I don't know, maybe you could help me think of something to make her be normal again." There was a long pause leaving Nicole listening to dead air. Finally after a few seconds Ashlynne spoke.

"Well, I was going to do this in a few months, but since it must be bad if your calling me I'll take off from school now."

"What do you mean?" Nicole asked, not sure what this girl was getting at.

"I was going to take a week off from school and come there. I figured I would come down and keep you guys company. But I'll come down now."

"Right now?"

"Well, I have some packing to do and phone calls to make so I won't be able to come until tomorrow. Is that ok?"

"Perfect. You call this number when you get your flight and I'll come get you. She'll be so happy to see you."

* * *

Ashlynne had called Nicole the next morning telling her what time her flight would land. Nicole borrowed her mother's car while Rachel was at work. She picked Ashlynne up around eleven. There was traffic everywhere. If she wasn't nervous enough about meeting someone she knew so much about but never saw face to face, Joe was now blowing up her phone. Calling every five minutes asking stupid questions. She finally got so fed up she shut her phone off. She would explain when she got home because she knew he would be waiting there, ready to kill whoever she was with.

She pulled up to the airport in front of a girl that best described Ashlynne. She had short blonde hair, blue eyes and a really beautiful smile. She is exactly how Rachel described her. Nicole climbed out of the car and helped her with her bags.

"Thank you for coming." Nicole said smiling. She barely talked to Ashlynne but she already knew she would like her.

"Thank you for thinking of me when you knew Rachel needed help. It means a lot to me." Ashlynne got comfortable in the front seat, fixing her sunglasses she leaned back and smiled. She did want to help Rachel, but she was also there to help herself. Bodie hadn't left her mind the past few months. They had talked on the phone almost everyday. He had even flew to meet her a few times without anyone knowing. He knew he was playing a testy game leaving Boston without telling Billy, but like he told her many times, she was worth it.

Nicole knew Rachel wasn't working late today, and cutting it close to bumping into her in the parking lot was almost 100. When she parked her mothers car and saw no sight of Rachel's truck she sighed with relief. She would rather have to explain after they were already settled in. She grabbed a couple of Ashlynne's suitcases while Ashlynne took the rest of her things and they headed to the apartment building. Lo and behold Joe was standing outside, arms over his chest and his face serious, and Nicole swore if he was animated steam would have been coming out of his ears.

"Why the fuck didn't you answer your fuckin' phone?" He demanded as the girls walked to him. Nicole rolled her eyes as she walked past him through the doors to the apartment building. He let out a small growl as he followed her into the elevator.

"Ashlynne…Joe….Joe….Ashlynne." Nicole nodded her head between the two as she did a quick introduction. Joe looked over at Ashlynne giving her a weak smile. Ashlynne doing the same. "I didn't answer my phone because it died." Nicole handed Joe her keys and nodded at her front door. Joe sighed deeply as he snatched the keys from her hand. He opened the door his eyes burning into Nicole's. He stepped aside letting the girls in.

"I'm Rachel's friend. Nicole did me a favor and picked me up from the airport." Ashlynne placed her bags on the couch and turned to Joe. "I wanted it to be a surprise that I was here. I'm sorry if you had plans with Nicole. It was my fault." Joe's face softened a bit. He walked over to Nicole and kissed her at the temple.

"It's ok, I was…I was just worried that's all." Nicole smiled.

"Well Ray will be home soon so, if you want to freshen up the bathroom is at the end of the hall. She's going to be so happy to see you." Ashlynne smiled then headed to the bathroom.

"Why's she here?" Joe whispered.

"You've seen how bad she's been lately. She's completely losing herself. Ashlynne was coming down anyway, so she just figured she'd come a bit earlier."

"What are you guys gonna do?"

"Well," Nicole really hadn't thought about going out but maybe that would be something Rachel needed. "maybe go out, get a few drinks. I'll call Daniela and we'll have a girls night. We don't have work tomorrow so, she'll definitely go." Joe grabbed Nicole into a hug.

"Just be careful, no matter where you wind up going." He kissed her deep and long. He pulled away then kissed her forehead. "I wasn't going to wait much longer for you," he said as he headed towards the door. "I have work, so … I guess I'll see you tomorrow." He winked at her then opened the door. Rachel stood at the door her keys in hand about to open the lock.

"Hey Ray," Joe said smiling. She smiled back at him giving him a kiss on the cheek. "I was just leaving. Talk to you girls tomorrow." Rachel walked past him into the apartment. She placed her bag and keys on the kitchen table then froze when she saw all the luggage on the couch. Her eyebrows narrowed with suspicion.

"Going somewhere?" She asked Nicole.

"Um…actually," she was interrupted by Ashlynne walking back down the hallway. Rachel looked up her smile from ear to ear. She walked quickly over to Ashlynne.

"Ashlynne!" She hugged her friend. "What are you doing here?"

"Surprise!" She sang as she pulled away from Rachel. "I had some time off from school so I thought, who'd better to see then Rachel."

"This is great." She looked over at Nicole who was smiling bigger then ever. It was nice seeing Rachel smile like she was truly happy again.

"So…I was thinking," Nicole took a step closer to Rachel "how about we go out tonight? Girls night, me you Ashlynne and Daniela?" Rachel's smile widened if that was at possible.

"Umm…yeah I think I can do that." She laughed. "Where, when and how drunk are we gonna get?" Rachel asked making the other two laugh.

* * *

The four girls sat around an old wooden table, drunk and laughing as a waitress was asking if they wanted anything else. The waitress smiled at the girls who were clearly having a great time even in the shit hole bar that Daniela had suggested. "Me and Mike come here all the time." She had said. They had placed their orders for more shots and a few more mixed drinks then watched as the waitress shook her head as she headed back to the bar.

"Thank God you and Mike come here a lot otherwise we'd be at The Four Roses." Nicole laughed.

"Hell no." Rachel shook her head laughing. "I wouldn't step foot in that piece of shit place if you paid me. Not anymore."

"What's the Four Roses?" Ashlynne asked downing her last shot. She looked over to the bar to see what was taking their waitress so long. "Where the hell is that woman with our drinks?"

"First, the waitress just walked away from us to get our drinks Ash," Rachel laughed, "second, The Four Roses is this stupid hole in the wall bar where I first met that asshole that thinks he's God." Daniela and Nicole looked more serious now. This was supposed to be a good night, not a night of her thinking about Billy. "You wouldn't like it there," she continued "it smells." Rachel busted out laughing making the rest of the girls laugh with her. After a few seconds Ashlynne composed herself and looked at the bar again. She could see their waitress talking to some guy, not paying attention to the fact she had an order to fill.

"I see if you want something done, you need to do it yourself." Ashlynne rose to her feet. "Excuse me ladies, I shall return with our drinks." She walked slowly to the bar to keep from tripping over herself. The bar tender smiled at her as she placed her hands on the counter. She wore a black skirt and a fitted v-neck baby blue long sleeve shirt that showed a perfect amount of cleavage in these types of situations.

"What can I get you?" He asked smiling, his eyes falling exactly where she knew they would. She leaned forward a bit giving the guy an eye full.

"Well," she started "your waitress over there is very inattentive to our needs and I think that, because we are paying customers after all and we had to wait for drinks that were two feet in front of us that we should be accommodated for her tardiness."

"How long she make you wait?"

"Long enough!" she stated. He eyed her one more time then looked over at the waitress that was still not paying attention. He looked back at Ashlynne and smirked. "See," she nodded over to the girl "she still isn't getting our drinks."

"What'll you have?" He asked a little more annoyed. Ashlynne smiled then gave him her order.

"A lot of drinks for one girl." A voice came from next to her ear. She looked to her left to see an extremely attractive man looking back at her. He had a sleeveless shirt on, showing off his very tattooed arms. His sly smile was quite attractive. Ashlynne smiled back facing herself towards him.

"I can handle my liquor." She watched him with a smile as he licked his lips at her. His eyes scanning her every curve.

"I bet you can." He said still eyeing her. "So, here with anyone?" His face was closer to hers.

"Yeah, my girls." She nodded behind her.

"Why isn't your man with you?" He leaned closer.

"Cause he's meeting up with me later tonight, after I'm all nice and drunk." She smiled.

"Ah, that's too bad." He looked up at the bar tender and nodded. He knew his usual. After the bar tender handed him his beer he took a sip. Ashlynne got a crazy idea that she knew maybe wouldn't be the best thing for Rachel, but it wouldn't hurt to try.

"But, unlike me and two of my friends at my table, my third friend is quite available." He raised his eyebrows.

"What's her name?"

"What's your name?" She snapped making him smile.

"Brian."

"Her name's Rachel." Brian raised his eyebrows then looked behind the girl he was talking to. He could see the faces of two of her friends. The third one had her back completely facing him. He watched for a few more seconds waiting to see this Rachel's face. Before he looked back at his conversation Rachel turned her head showing some of her face. A sinister smile spread across Brian's face. He looked back at Ashlynne.

"I'd _love _to meet Rachel." Ashlynne just about squeaked as she grabbed the drinks the bar tender had placed next to her. She headed back to the table a huge grin on her face.

"What the hell are you so happy about?" Nicole asked smiling.

"This hot, and I mean hot guy just hit on me, I told him I was seeing someone, but I told him that you," she pointed her finger in Rachel's face. "were not."

"No, no…no!" Rachel shook her head after she took a big gulp of her drink. "I am so not in the mood for men tonight."

"Ray, he's really hot. You, from your past men, I think will love him." She laughed. Nicole and Daniela snickered.

"No Ash!" Her eyes widened.

"Well, sorry but it's too late." Ashlynne straightened herself in her seat. "Here he comes." She whispered. Nicole and Daniela tried to hide their smiles as they watched the sudden horror cross Rachel's face as the man approached. Daniela looked at Rachel giving her the signal that he was definitely what Ashlynne said he was. Nicole looked at him and narrowed her eyebrows. She could swear she has seen him before. Rachel looked over at Nicole and started to giggle making Nicole giggle with her. She was too drunk to hear the man talking to Ashlynne next to her, or maybe she would have recognized his voice.

"…and this is Rachel." She could feel Ashlynne pull on her shirt. She looked over at Ashlynne, a large smile still across her mouth. She slowly looked up at the guy her friend was trying to set her up with. First she noticed his arms, tattoos and muscles. So far she was liking what she saw, but her smile quickly faded when her eyes fell on his face. That sinister look she had seen once before was inches away from her.

"Hi Rachel." His smile big as he put his hand out for her to shake. "I'm Brian." She was frozen in her seat as she looked into those cold eyes she had nightmares about till this day. She was holding her breath trying her hardest not to start shaking. The last thing she needed was to give off any vibes of who was before her. Nicole would be on the phone calling Joe in seconds. She looked down at his hand and cleared her throat.

"Ah, you know what, I'm going to run to the bathroom. I've been touching this dirty table all night, don't want to be rude and shake with a dirty hand." She didn't know what else to say to get her out of there. She quickly rose to her feet and walked as fast as she could to the bathroom. Brian stood up watching as Rachel walked off. Nicole could tell something wasn't right, but then again it could be all the alcohol they drank tonight.

"That girl is weird sometimes." Ashlynne said laughing.

"That's ok," Brian said still watching the direction Rachel went "I like girls like that." He looked back down at Ashlynne and smiled. "Since she's going to wash her hands, I think I should wash mine." He winked at her. The girls watched Brian walk from the table then leaned closer to one another and started laughing.

"What's up with Ray?" Daniela asked. "That guy was really good looking."

"She hasn't been with anyone other then Billy since, well she got with him." Ashlynne let out a huff making the other two look at her.

"What was that for?" Nicole asked confused. Ashlynne shook her head realizing she had done that out loud.

"Nothing." Everyone was too wasted to really care what she meant.

Rachel sighed as she opened the stall door. She had come in the bathroom and put cold water on her face. She was feeling nauseous and ran to the closest stall just incase. Her head was spinning and her heart was racing. How could this be happening? That part of her life she thought was pushed behind her, now it was back staring her right in the face. Out of all the bars in Boston, she had to be in the same one as him. She had stepped one foot out of the stall when she was grabbed by the throat and pushed back in. Brian slammed her back against the cold metal his body pressed firmly up against hers. His grip was tight as he put his face to hers. She looked deep into the eyes of the man who attacked her a few months back.

"What are the fuckin' odds of this?" He laughed. "Your friend was what I wanted tonight, and probably would have had if I didn't see your pretty little face tonight. See you," he grazed his free hand over her face. "you, I almost had too, but I warned you what would happen if you told."

"I didn't tell him." She could barely breath out the words. His grip tightened on her neck as she spoke. His lips were inches away from hers. She could feel his hot breath on her face.

"Ah, but you fuckin' did tell him. Two of my men are dead because of you." Rachel's eyes widened. Did Billy kill those men? "But, I've decided that I'm just going to finish where I left off," he brushed his lips along her neck. Tears started to form in her eyes as flash backs from that night stormed her brain. His mouth was now at her ear, his breath hot and hard against it. "And I did promise you I would finish what I started if you told that prick ex-boyfriend of yours."

Nothing could stop the tears from flowing down her cheeks. She was too afraid to scream, or even move. His hand dropped down to the bottom of her shirt pushing it up. He rubbed his hand across her belly then raised his hand up to her chest. He could feel her body tense under him making him smile. He put his lips lightly to hers. She moved her face quickly, turning it as far as she could from his mouth. He let go of her neck and grabbed her chin pulling her face to his. He kissed her hard. She tried to let out a small scream making him smack his hand over her mouth. She squeezed her eyes shut praying for this to be over. He placed his free hand down to her inner thigh and worked up. Her eyes shot open feeling his hand on her bare skin. It slowly crept up her skirt as he kissed her neck. She prayed for a miracle. Anything to make him stop.

"Billy won't help you this time." He growled. "He wont come to your aid anymore. He's done with you." The words hurt as much as what he was doing. "Must have seen you as used goods." He was about to touch her when the bathroom door burst open, sending laughing girls flying in. Brian pulled back from her his eyes locked on hers. He pushed hard on her mouth with his hand, his other hand rose to his face. He placed his finger on his mouth and let out a small sshhh.

"We'll finish this later." He whispered. He let go of her mouth and opened the stall. He walked out and smiled at the girls that had just come in. They were looking back at him their eyes wide with shock. Rachel could hear the girls snickering as he walked out of the bathroom.

"_God, he was hot_." One girl said.

"_Did he just have sex with someone in the stall_?" Another said. Normally Rachel would care what people thought about her, but right now she needed to leave. She had to go home. She slowly walked out of the stall and past the girls.

"_Oh my God, he did have sex_." she wouldn't look up at them as she burst through the door. She walked as fast as she could back to her table.

"Jesus Ray, what the hell happened to you?" Ashlynne said standing up. Rachel's face was pale and her makeup was smearing. She could tell she had been crying.

"I got sick, I have to go." Rachel grabbed her bag trying to keep her balance.

"What happened with hunky tattoo boy?" Daniela said putting her jacket on.

"Ah, I don't know. I didn't see him." She said avoiding everyone's eyes. Nicole didn't like the feeling she had. Something was wrong and Rachel needed to tell her. The four of them left the bar in a hurry, Rachel a few feet ahead of them. She grabbed her keys out of her bag and shut off her alarm as she headed towards her truck.

"You are not driving, I'll call Joe." Nicole said getting her cell phone out.

"No!" Rachel snapped turning around facing Nicole. The three girls stared wide eyed back at Rachel. "I mean, I'm fine. I seriously don't even feel like I drank anymore." She grabbed the handle on her door and ripped it open. She jumped in and started the truck. The other three piled in. Rachel sped off as soon as their doors were shut.

* * *

Rachel's head was still spinning from the other night. She had taken at least 30 showers since then but she could still feel him on her, smell his cologne. She refused to tell Nicole who he was, knowing she would run to Joe who would run to Billy. She was more scared of him not doing anything then him actually doing something. She walked down the steps of her school headed to her truck when her phone rang. She picked it up sighing.

"Hey," she said to Nicole.

"So, you wanna do something tonight?" Nicole asked, almost pleading.

"No, I don't feel good. I think I'm just going to watch a movie. You and Ash can go out."

"Ray, come on. You haven't been out since the other night."

"I just don't feel like it. I'll talk to you later." Rachel closed her phone without saying goodbye.

Nicole looked down at her phone. She couldn't understand this sudden change in attitude that Rachel had. She wasn't even excited about Ashlynne being there anymore. Nicole sighed as she looked out the window.

"Where are we going?" She asked Joe.

"To get gas." Nicole sunk deeper into her seat as Joe pulled into the closest gas station. He jumped out of the car and ran in the store to pay the gas attendant. He jogged back out and started pumping the gas. Nicole sighed again grabbing her phone. She flipped it open to dial Rachel's number, but decided not to. She closed her phone again then looked around. Someone was walking up the side of the store that caught her attention. She leaned forward and squinted her eyes. Oh, it was just him. Wonder what he was doing here. She didn't see him get out of a car. Nicole jumped when Joe opened the door, he jumped in and slammed the door shut.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" She asked. Joe was staring out of the windshield in the same direction she had just been looking. "Hello." She waved her hand in front of his face.

"That fuckin' mother," Joe said through clenched teeth.

"Who are you talking about?" Nicole asked looking out the windshield.

"Syn, that fuckin' punk that attacked Rachel." He pointed out the window.

"That's not Syn," Nicole started. Joe looked over at her his eyes narrowed.

"How the fuck would you know?" He snapped.

"Because, that's Brian." She said. His eyes widened.

"Brian's his real fuckin' name. How the fuck did you know that?" Nicole looked at Joe in shock.

"Oh my God! That explains Rachel's reaction to him the other night." She said out loud, not meaning to.

"That's the fuckin' guy you were talking about?" Joe sat up straight. "That's him?" he yelled making Nicole jump. Joe's phone rang loud in his pocket. He ripped it out and flipped it open.

"Hello!" His voice loud.

"What the fuck is up your ass?"

"Ah, nothing Billy, what's up?" Nicole shook her head and mouthed the word no. She was begging him not to tell Billy.

"We got work to do, I need you to take the ride with me to pick up some shit from Bones." Billy ordered.

"Fine, where do you want to meet?"

"Who you with?"

"My girl."

"I'll meet you at her building." Billy said before hanging up. Joe started the car and sped out of the gas station, driving straight to Nicole's place.

* * *

Billy sped into the parking lot and found a spot right away. He cut the engine and sat back in his seat. He took a deep drag of his cigarette and leaned his head back. He wasn't looking forward to his monthly pick up from Bones, but in order to break even he had to get more then what they cooked on their own. Billy opened his eyes and looked around. He heard the sound of a car driving in, thinking it was Joe, but noticing Rachel's truck right away. His eyes fixed on her as she climbed out of her truck. She grabbed her bag for school and put it over her shoulder. He sighed to himself as he watched her every move. He could see her look at him from the corner of her eye. She walked quickly and almost ran into the apartment building as Billy watched her. If he wasn't waiting for Joe he probably would have gotten out of the car so she could see him. But he was pressed for time and couldn't play any games today. A car drove past Billy pulling into a spot on the other side of the lot. He watched as Nicole and Joe walked to the front of the building. He started his engine and sped over to them. Joe heard Billy's car right away and stopped.

"I'll see you tonight babe." Joe said to Nicole as he made his way to his brothers car. He climbed in, Billy speeding off. Joe knew he had to tell Billy what happened to Rachel. He just didn't know how. No better way then just say it, he thought. But Billy wasn't normal with his anger. He would flip bad or really, really bad. Joe shifted in his seat, glancing over at his brother. He did this several times until Billy let out a hard sigh.

"What the fuck is wrong?" He asked glancing from Joe to the road. Joe cleared his throat knowing it was now or never.

"It's about Syn." They were only a couple of blocks from Bones' shop when Billy slowed down. He sat up straight, leaning closer to the steering wheel.

"What about him?" Billy asked annoyed. He flicked his cigarette out the window, leaning to his left he glanced back over to Joe.

"My girl seen him at Big Whiskey's the other night." Joe said avoiding Billy's eyes.

"Who was she with?" Billy's jaw was tight waiting for Joe to answer.

"Daniela, this girl Ashlynne and," Joe cleared his throat again. "…Rachel." Billy tilted his head from left to right until Joe could hear it crack. Billy did that since they were kids, he said it helped relieve tension in his neck.

"Joe, you got something to say, say it." Billy demanded.

"Nicole thinks he did something to her when she went to the bathroom." Joe jolted forward as Billy slammed on the breaks. His hands smashed against the dashboard to keep from hitting his face. Billy looked over at Joe, his breathing erratic.

"What the fuck do you mean she thinks he did something to her?" he said through clenched teeth. Joe took a deep breath before he told Billy the whole story. Billy's reaction wasn't what Joe expected. Then again, you never knew what he was going to do. Billy jumped out of the car, slamming the door shut. He stood in the middle of the road his hands behind his head as he stared up in the sky. His pride was in the way and she got hurt again. He wasn't there for her, _again_. Billy turned quickly dropping his fists onto the roof of his car. He let out a grunt that Joe would have thought was from an animal if he didn't know already it was from his brother. He could hear Billy taking his anger out on his car. Kicking it several times before stopping, placing his hands on his hips trying to catch his breath. Billy climbed back in the car and sped off to Bones' shop. He needed to get this over with as soon as possible. The bar seemed like the right place to be when he was done.

* * *

Billy looked at Nicole through hazy eyes as she whispered to Joe. He could hear every word she was saying. Rachel had been home all the time, by herself. She seemed depressed and unfocused. Billy knew some of this if not all was because of him. He missed her more then he even thought was possible. He never knew what this feeling was before he met her and he hated it. Every ounce of him regretted what he did to her. He never regretted anything but this, this was ripping him apart. He let his pride get in the way and left her open to get hurt again. Syn's face flashed across his mind. His jaw clenched as he stood up.

"Where you going?" Bodie asked as he straightened his back. Billy placed a cigarette in his mouth. Turning slightly to face Bodie he sighed.

"I've got something to take care of." He said, his voice cracking. Bodie stood up to follow.

"I'll come," Bodie started but Billy shook his head and pointed to Bodie's seat.

"Sit down." Joe and Nicole looked up at Billy as he walked to the door. Billy knew were he was headed and his blood was boiling. He jumped in his car and sped off in the direction on vengeance.

It didn't take long to get to the corner he knew Syn and his boys would be working. It was outside of his territory but he knew it well. Billy's car was parked a couple of blocks away in the shadows. He gripped the steering wheel tight as he watched Syn and his boys talk. Billy wanted him dead. The site of him was making him sick with rage. He had touched something that was Billy's and he needed to pay. He knew the cycle of revenge would never stop but at this moment he didn't care. He would be more prepared this time if someone wanted to take action on Billy and his crew.

His mind was racing of images of Rachel and Syn. His foot was pressed hard against the break wanting desperately to slam on the gas and head straight to Syn and his men running them down to the ground. His breathing became heavy, his heart pounding. Something was stopping him, making him hesitate this long. He looked over to his left looking up the long road that led back to the highway. He could drive back up that road and head to the one place he really wanted to be. Or he could step on the gas and end Syn's miserable life. Billy looked back at Syn, his anger growing more that his mind was made up. A deep menacing growl escaped Billy's throat he stepped on the gas and cut the wheel to the left. He would leave his revenge for another night. Right now, he needed the only thing that made sense to him.

* * *

The apartment was dark as he crept inside. He was definitely drunk, but not drunk enough to not know what he was doing. He knew exactly what he was doing. He came to claim what was his and not let her go again. He slowly walked to her bedroom, opening the door quietly. He didn't want to wake her…yet. He could see her lying on her stomach, her left leg bent, her arms hugging her pillow. Her blanket was at her thighs showing her tank top and boy shorts. He closed the door behind him looking over to see if he woke her when the door made a loud click. Nothing was going to stop him from being with her. She was not getting away from him. He wanted her back already, but seeing her there her body showing, was making him want her even more. He grabbed his boots pulling them off and placing them next to him. His jeans and shirt followed. By the time he reached the side of her bed he was naked. He knew she would wake up frightened, not knowing who he was right away. Apart of him was looking forward to it.

He reached down grabbing the covers and slowly climbed into her bed. She stirred a little making him stop. Once she was still he pushed himself next to her. His hand fell on her back lightly brushing her skin with his fingers. He traced lines up and down slowly feeling small goose bumps form on her skin. He hadn't touched her or been this close to her in months. The bottom of his belly burnt for her. The pain he was beginning to feel was intolerable. He needed her, more then he ever did. He leaned over kissing her back working his way up to her neck. She moved to this feeling turning herself onto her back. He pulled himself on top of her. The weight of his body was cutting her breathing making her open her eyes. When she did she looked around confused. When she realized someone was on top of her she tried to move, to break free. The room was dark, making it impossible to see who was in front of her.

Whoever it was, was holding her down. Trapping her underneath him. Her arms were moved and pinned next to her head, her legs pushed open. This can't be happening again, she thought. Maybe this is a dream and I'll wake up. But this wasn't a dream. She begged for him to let her go, but he didn't say a word. Didn't even move other then to keep her still. He finally moved letting her know how real this was, something she didn't find gratifying. He leaned closer to her, she could feel his breath on her face. She took a deep breath through her nose, about to let out the loudest scream she could muster when she smelt something so familiar. She stopped looking into the darkness at a faceless person, her eyebrows narrowed in confusion. The sweet smell of whiskey the musky smell of smoke and something else. Something that she remembers everyday. But it couldn't be. She shook her head lightly not understanding what was happening. She knew it couldn't be him.

She didn't think he was real until his mouth crashed on to hers. At first she tried to pull away but he was too strong. She moved her body trying to escape him when the kiss became more real and the person giving it definitely wasn't a dream. A chill ran down her stomach as she opened her mouth letting him in. She pulled her head up closer to him, kissing him back. He released her arms and placed a hand behind her head, grabbing at her hair. A low moan escaped her throat making Billy crazy. He reached down grabbing her tank top, pulling it with force over her head. Her shorts were pulled off the same way. They were like two animals in heat as they clawed at each other, both wanting, needing. Billy was not gentile as he grabbed her hips forcefully placing himself inside her. She would have screamed if he hadn't covered her mouth with his. Not a word was spoken as the two made up for lost time.


	20. Chapter 20

Everything in the room seemed to be closing in as Rachel's stare was locked on her bedroom door. She had been looking at since she woke up, but she didn't actually see it. All she could see was the memories of the night before. She still couldn't explain what happened. When she woke early that morning she could have sworn she was dreaming but when she moved and felt the soreness of her lower body she knew it wasn't a dream. After sitting up in her bed she sighed as she looked over at a sleeping Billy. Slowly her eyes had fell on her bedroom door, shock falling over her. Why had he come back? What was he up to? She was afraid to move, trying her best not to wake him. She wasn't sure of what she would be in for when he did finally wake. He had made it clear he didn't care for her anymore and didn't want her by his side, so why was he here in her bed? The night before had been the most amazing she had ever shared with him. Small chills fluttered her belly as she thought about it. She could almost still feel him touching her, holding her. She winced as she slightly moved her leg. She was going to be sore for days.

She held her breath as she felt Billy starting to move. He cleared his throat as he stretched. She looked at him from the corner of her eyes, her stomach anxious to what was to happen next. His eyes fluttered some until they finally stayed open. She couldn't move, unsure of what his reaction would be to seeing her. He had clearly been drunk when he slipped into her bed the night before, but now he was sober and his head was clear. Would he regret his moment of weakness with her? He sat up and threw his legs over the side of the bed, his feet hitting the floor in a loud thump. His back arched showing every muscle tense as he rubbed his bald head. She watched his every move as she slowly drew in breaths. She had never been so nervous in her life.

Billy slowly turned his head, looking at her from the corner of his eyes. His loud sigh as he turned back wasn't a shock to Rachel. She didn't expect anything less then for him to realize what he did and run away. She was shocked when he turned his body around and faced her. She held her breath when their eyes met. She wondered if he knew the power he had over her. There was no anger in his eyes, nor was there love. His eyes looked blank, almost as if he was looking past her. She wasn't sure what to do, but she knew they couldn't sit this way much longer. She needed to know why he was back. As soon as her mouth was open to speak her bedroom door flew open. Nicole stood dumbfound looking at the two of them on Rachel's bed.

"Oh shit." Nicole said clear shock in her voice. Billy looked at her, his eyebrows narrowed annoyance spread across his face. Her eyes jotted from Billy to Rachel as they both looked back at her. When she realized how long she was looking at them her face turned a pale pink. She stepped out of the bedroom and shut the door. Her hand was still on the knob as she glanced around confused.

"What the hell are you doing?" Joe asked as he threw a shirt over his head. Nicole grabbed his arm dragging him into the living room.

"Your never going to believe this." Nicole said looking back to the hallway making sure no one was listening.

"Why are you whispering?" Joe's eyes narrowed. Nicole put her finger to his mouth motioning him to be quiet.

"Billy's in there." She whispered pointing towards Rachel's room. Joe crossed his arms over his chest a small smile crept across his lips.

"What were they doing?" He asked.

"They both looked naked." Joe smiled wide at his girlfriends words.

Billy stood up his bare body showing, making Rachel blush. She hadn't seen him in months. His body looked even more toned then before. He reached down and grabbed his clothes. She watched as he dressed, hoping he would say something. She knew he wouldn't so she made the first move.

"Where are you going?" She barely said. Her voice cracked as she spoke.

"Got some shit to take care of." He said as he put his boots on. Rachel leaned forward, her eyes narrowing at him. She knew he would leave without another word if she didn't start talking. Her stomach was in knots as she finally mustered the courage to just flat out ask him.

"Are we going to talk about this?" Rachel stood up, Billy watching her every move as she dressed herself in a pair of jeans and a fitted t-shirt. Billy sighed as he reached for his coat.

"We'll talk about this later." He said flatly then turned and walked out of her room. She followed with intensions of stopping him when there was a heavy knock at the front door. Billy stopped preparing himself for anything. Rachel walked to the door and opened it with slight hesitation. Her father stood there a big smile on his face.

"Doing anything today?" He asked. Rachel stood nervously giving her father a small smile. She looked back at Billy whose eyes were fixed on her father. She snapped her head back to her father smiling again.

"No, I'm not doing anything today dad. Come in." She moved aside letting him in. He took several steps stopping not far from Billy. They locked eyes, neither men saying a word. Rachel shut the door, slowly she walked to her father and stopped. Standing in between him and Billy her stomach began to twist with nerves. She knew her father wasn't one to start an argument but he was also her father. He didn't like who she chose to be with, but he was finally accepting it. Billy leaned his head back, his eyes peering down at her father. He placed his hands on his hips his shoulders far apart. Her father cleared his throat before he spoke.

"So," he started. He looked over at Rachel then back at Billy. "Your Billy?" Billy just looked at him. He didn't flinch or speak. "If this is what she wants, then she must see something in you that she loves." He spoke boldly. "And I want my only child to be happy, and if its you that makes her happy," her father put out his hand for Billy to shake. "Then I'm happy." Billy's eyes looked down at his hand, his stature still the same. His eyebrows narrowed as he stared. He never had anyone give that kind of respect to him before. Slowly and with much hesitation he raised his hand and placed it in Rachel's fathers. To his surprise the mans grip was strong and meaningful. Rachel watched in amazement as the two men shook hands. Billy was the first to release, his eyes darted around the room, a new uncomfortable feeling sweeping over him. He walked to Rachel, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"I'll be back tonight." He said before he walked out of her apartment door. Her father looked at her with sympathy in his eyes.

"Did I come at a bad time?" He asked as he sat down. She shook her head slightly as she looked down at her father.

"No dad, its fine. I'm going to just go brush my teeth and grab my bag, then we can leave." Rachel said as she headed to the bathroom.

* * *

Rachel picked at her food as her father talked about work. She used to be so interested in what he did but like with school, her mind was else where. No matter how hard she tried Billy was consuming her mind, yet again. She didn't know what to say to him when she finally saw him again. She had the courage to talk that morning, but he ran away leaving her to wonder.

"…and I picked up a prostitute last night. She stayed over. Actually she's still there." Her father said raising his eyebrows at her. "So you really haven't heard a word I said huh?" Rachel slowly looked up at her father confusion in her eyes.

"What?" She asked coolly.

"I just told you I picked up a prostitute and you didn't even flinch." Her father said leaning a bit closer to her.

"You did what?" She demanded. She straightened her back out, now her interest was on her father.

"Rachel, honey" her father started. She was obviously thinking about something worthy enough to keep her from talking. He rubbed his temples, something about being a single parent to a young girl was making his head hurt. She was in love with someone he knew to be a unsuitable person for his daughter. He had asked around about Billy Darley and his "friends". Even calling Detective Wallis and not liking what he heard. Unfortunately anything he was known to have done could never be proven. He took that into slight consideration. "Tell me what's on your mind, so I can help take that look off your face." Rachel was not comfortable talking to her father about Billy. Not in the sense that she was thinking anyway. But she was curious as to why he shook his hand.

"What was that all about, back at my apartment?" She asked as she looked back down at her food. Her father cleared his throat.

"Well, this isn't exactly what I wanted for you. I wanted a man for you with an education, a job. Someone that could provide the right kind of future for you. Someone that you could have children with someday." He was now the one looking down at his food. "You always want better for your children then you had yourself."

"Dad," she could see the hurt look on his face. The conversation needed to be over. "Let's just forget about it." She waved her hand. He shook his head in disagreement.

"No, no I want to talk about this now. I need to get this over with." His handsome eyes looked into hers. She sighed, her stomach now twisting with nerves. Heart to hearts always came easy to them, but never did they have to discuss her love for a drug dealing gang lord. "I know you really care for this man," he continued. "And I am accepting this enough to let you know that I'm here for you, always. My biggest fear is he gets you involved with whatever he does,"

"Never!" She barked. "He would never put me in danger or ever involve me with anything he does."

"So you are saying he does bad things?"

"Dad!" Her voice was loud. Louder then she wanted.

"I'm sorry," he said putting his hands up. "I don't want to argue, just please I beg you, please be careful. That's all I ask." he reached across the table and grabbed her hands. "Just know that I am here for you whenever you need me. I will be here to pick up the pieces when they fall," Rachel started to pull her hands away huffing at her fathers words. He grabbed her hands tighter his eyebrows up as he continued. "I'm just saying, sometimes you can be so in love with someone and so right for one another and it still doesn't work. I'm here for you if that happens. But I see that sparkle in your eye when you speak his name." he sighed as he looked deeper into his daughters eyes. "I trust you," Rachel's eyes watered as she listened to his words. "And I'm here for you."

Rachel couldn't control the water that was forming in here eyes. A single tear fell down her cheek, her father smiling as he wiped it away. She smiled back embarrassment setting in. She was about to speak when her cell phone rang in her bag. She looked for it quickly then answered without looking at the caller id.

"Hello." She said her voice shaky as she wiped the rest of the tears that started to fall. Her father leaned back still smiling happy that there conversation was ending well.

"Meet me under the bridge." Billy said, his voice stern. Rachel took a deep breath. He didn't sound happy at all. Was meeting him when he was like this such a good idea.

"Um, well I'm out with my father, when did you want to meet up?" She asked giving her father a smile of reassurance that everything was ok. She could hear the deep sigh on the other end of the phone. He didn't say anything for several seconds.

"Rachel," He started then sighed.

"Ok,' she looked over at her father, her eyes telling him what she needed him to know. He smiled at her then nodded for them to leave.

"Come on, I'll drive you back home." he said as he put his coat on.

"I'm going home now. I'll meet you in about a half hour?" She sat waiting for him to speak. It wasn't good enough for him, she could tell by his silence. But to her surprise he said fine. She hung up with Billy then followed her father to the car.

"Thank you for taking me out dad. I needed this." She wrapped her arm around his kissing his cheek.

* * *

Rachel's stomach was spinning as she drove to the bridge. Billy usually only used it for meetings and selling. But why would he want to meet with her there? Why wouldn't he want to meet at his place or even hers? Something didn't feel right and she was thinking about turning around and going back home but doing that would piss him off further making him do God knows what to her. She drove on only a few minutes from the bridge. All she could think about was what he could want to talk about. Could it be about Matt? Did he find out? Several deep breaths and she was feeling even worse. Her stomach was sick and she could feel her hands shaking.

She drove down the dusty road that led under the bridge. She could see Billy leaning against the drivers side door, his ankles crossed, his left arm against the car. His face was hidden from the glare of the sun in her eyes, but she could tell he was watching her pull up. She stopped her truck several feet away from him. Her body refused to move after she cut the ignition. Frozen in her seat she started to breath heavy. She could see his hand fall to his side after he took a drag if his cigarette. She watched the cloud of smoke dissipate above him.

Slowly she opened the door and slid out. Her eyes not leaving him. His face came more into view as she made her way closer. He flung his cigarette to the side and straightened his body. She crossed her arms over her chest after stopping. He gave her his hard glare.

"I want to know everything." He spat. She creased her brow unsure what he was talking about. "Don't give me that look Ray, you know what I'm talking about." She didn't know what he was talking about. His impatience was getting the best of him. "Syn!" He yelled. "Or Brian as he recently introduced himself." Her eyes widened at him.

"How did you," He waved his hand at her.

"What did he do to you at the bar? Did he fuckin' touch you?" He took a step closer to her. She wanted to take a step back, unsure of what he was doing. Instead she stood still.

"No,"

"No what Rachel?" He yelled. Rachel's eyes began to water as she slightly shook her head no. She didn't' want to tell him. She couldn't let him know what happened. He would lose it and end up in jail, or worse. He asked her the same question several times. Each time she shook her head biting back her lip to keep from getting hysterical. He was visibly becoming impatient as he rubbed his bald head.

"Rachel, tell me now! I need you to tell me what the hell happened!" His voice was now a scream. A deep growl of a scream that was making Rachel wish she never agreed to meet him. She took a step back, Billy realizing this he grabbed her arms.

"Where do you think your going?" His face inches from hers. She couldn't hold the tears in any longer. They fell down her face, gravity completely taking over. "Tell me! Tell me now!" He barked. She shook her head no again. This wasn't going to end well if she told him the truth. She should tell him nothing and be done with it. She looked into his eyes her body shaking under his grip. He would know. He would know she lied and who knows what he would think after that. She had him back, as far as she knew and she didn't want to be without him again.

"He grabbed me in the bathroom." She blurted.

"Then what?" He asked more calmly. She explained the threats Syn had given her. Billy listened carefully before he walked away from her. He threw his hands behind his head as he looked up in the sky. He turned quickly heading to his car. "Get in!" He said as he pointed to the passengers seat.

"But my truck,"

"Get in the fuckin' car Rachel. I'll send someone to get your truck." She didn't hesitate again. She climbed in shutting the door just before he sped away.

They pulled up to the one place Rachel wasn't permitted to be. Billy climbed out of the car. He quickly walked to the stairs as he looked back at Rachel then stopped. He nodded his head for her to follow. She didn't know what he was up to, but she did know not to piss him off anymore then he was. She climbed out of the car and jogged after him. She walked up the stairs and followed him into the abandoned building.

"I thought I wasn't allowed here?" She whispered grabbing onto the back of his coat. He looked back at her from the corner of his eyes and sighed.

"I know," he looked forward again as he walked faster. "…but this is important." Rachel held onto him as she followed him through the abandoned building. He opened the door to a dark room. Putting on the light he made his way to a big floor safe. Rachel watched him as he quickly undid the lock and opened it. He pulled out a box. It was the same box Rachel had seen the first night they kissed. He opened the box, pulling out the gun she remembered seeing. He walked over to quickly making Rachel take a few steps back.

"Do you know what this is?" He asked.

"It's a gun Billy."

"No," he shook his head getting annoyed. "What kind of gun?" Rachel looked down at the shiny metal in his hands. She shook her head as she looked back up at him.

"I have no idea Billy, I'm not comfortable right now."

"Your going to learn how to use this."

"No way!" She turned to leave as Billy grabbed her arm.

"This is for your own protection. I can't always be there Rachel. Do this for me." His eyes were serious. Rachel sighed her stomach in knots. But she knew she had no choice. He wasn't going to let her leave his sight until she learned how to use the gun. She nodded her head slightly as he handed her the gun. Her hands shook as she grabbed it. It was heavier then it looked.

"Don't shake. You'll wind up shooting yourself." Rachel's already sad face was even worse. Billy was standing behind her know, his hands on hers as she held the gun. He raised her hands, the gun aiming on the wall.

"We can't shoot this in here." She whispered.

"We're not. I just want you to hold it." He said in her ear. She glanced over at him then back at the gun. She took a deep breath as she placed her finger on the trigger. Her eyes glazed over as reality was setting in. Billy wasn't always going to be there. He wasn't going to be able to protect her all the time.

"Tomorrow, after I'm done with that fat bastard, your going to learn to use this." He said. His voice so close to her ear sending shivers down her belly. She glance over at him again, this time Billy noticing. He grabbed the gun from her hand and placed it on the beat up desk next to them. He turned her around, grabbing the back of her neck with one hand he kissed her. He grabbed her with his other hand, lifting her on top of the desk. Still kissing her he placed both of his hands at the bottom of her shirt. Shoving his hands up he pulled the shirt over her head. Rachel didn't protest, not even in this dirty room. Rachel reached down unbuckling Billy's belt. She now put her hands under his shirt, pulling up quickly. Billy finished pulling his shirt over his head and letting it drop to the floor. Moans escaped her throat as Billy unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them off. His mouth found her neck sending bolts of pleasure through her entire body. This, she missed more then anything. How much he showed her he wanted her. How good he made everything feel.

Without warning Billy was inside her. She was louder then usual as he moved. This enhanced his own pleasure. Rachel wrapped her arms and legs around him pulling him as close as she could. Their hearts beat faster, their breath quickening as they moved with each other. Rachel noticed how loud they both became, almost laughing at herself knowing if anyone was outside that door they were getting a great visual of what was happening in here.

Rachel's body couldn't hold it in anymore. She reached her peak, Billy shortly after. He stopped, his heavy body falling on her as she tried to hold herself up. It felt as if they were sitting there forever trying to catch their breaths. Finally Billy pulled away kissing Rachel one more time before he got dressed.

Rachel climbed off the desk as quickly as her shaken legs would let her. She dressed and followed Billy to the door. He looked back at her as he walked into the hall. A small smirk played across his lips. Something else she missed.

"Billy," she said grabbing his shirt. He stopped, turning to look at her. Her heart was pounding with nerves. She wanted to say this to him for months now. She didn't want this moment to pass without saying it. "I love you."

Billy turned his body to face her completely. He looked hard into her eyes. His hand slowly reached the back of her neck pulling her lips to his. He kissed her deep and hard, Rachel's entire body paralyzed by him. He pulled away slightly there mouths only inches apart.

"I love you too," he whispered. With that he turned and walked back down the long hall. Rachel smiled to herself as she followed him.


	21. Chapter 21

"It's simple," Joe said as he stood behind Rachel helping her hold the gun in her hand. She remembered what Billy had showed her yesterday, but she was still having trouble firing it. She took a deep breath as Joe slowly let go of her hands and took a step back. "Go ahead, like I showed you."

Rachel stood tall and positioned herself, aiming at the broken burnt car ahead of her. She sucked in several breaths before she felt the sudden urge to pull the trigger. Her palms were sweaty, her heart pounding. She had to keep reminding herself that this was only target practice. She wasn't actually shooting anyone. She could feel her finger tightening, ready and willing to pull when suddenly she dropped her hands to her sides.

"I can't Joe. I'm sorry." She turned around to face Joe. He rolled his head around his shoulders, his neck cracking. Shaking his head in annoyance, he lowered it letting it hang low. As he looked at his boots he thought about how Billy was going to kill him if she didn't fire the gun at least once. Billy woke Joe up early that morning, kicking his bed until he woke, volunteering him to teach Rachel how to use a gun. He would have done it himself if he didn't get a phone call from Bones telling him about a in-house sale that needed to be made.

Joe raised his head looking back at Rachel. Her face was pale and her eyes were sad. She wasn't ready for this shit and Billy didn't want to hear it.

"Rachel, just _one _time. That's it. Then we can leave and I'll buy you a round of drinks to celebrate." He stood a step closer to her. "But this has to happen. He isn't going to want to listen to reason on this one." Rachel shook her head, her eyes slowly swelling up with tears as she looked away from him. She couldn't do it. She wasn't like Billy or Joe or anyone of them. Joe grabbed her shoulder making her look back at him.

"Ok," Rachel said as she slowly turned around. She wiped away the fresh tears that formed under her eyes. As she raised the gun again Billy's car came barreling down the dirt road. Joe and Rachel looked over watching him get out of the car. He flicked his cigarette as he strode over to them. Joe took a step back hoping his brother would take over. Billy stopped next to Rachel, a sly smile crept his lips as he took his sunglasses off. Rachel looked up at him, her eyebrows creasing as she started to smile.

"What?" She asked as he stepped closer to her, his hand falling on the small of her back. He leaned closer, his mouth brushing against her ear.

"You look sexy holding that gun." He whispered. Her smile widened as his face came closer to hers. He kissed her lips, soft at first, then harder. Joe cleared his throat letting it be known his presence was still there. A low grunt could be heard from Billy as he looked over at his brother.

"She hasn't fired it yet Billy." Joe stated as he crossed his arms over his chest. Rachel shot him a look. She couldn't believe he was willingly giving her up. Billy's head snapped back to Rachel, his eyes narrowing down at her.

"You've been gone for fuckin' hours." he stated. Rachel shrugged her shoulders as she looked down at the gun.

"This isn't easy Billy." She said.

"Yes it is. You put the gun in your hand, you aim, you fire. Sounds fuckin' real simple to me." His tone becoming more annoyed with every word he spoke. He reached down snatching the gun from her hand. "This isn't a joke Ray, you have to learn." He stood next to her and aimed the gun at the car. She stood back as she watched him. He looked like he actually enjoyed this. Four shots rang through the abandoned overpass. Rachel jumped with each fire her hands covering her ears. She hadn't noticed how many steps away from Billy she took until she looked next to her. Joe was sighing to himself as he threw his head back closing his eyes.

"See," Billy shouted over to her. "Real easy." Billy took a few quick steps closer to Rachel. The happy-to-see-her look was gone. The I-hate-the-world-and-everything-attached-to-it look beamed off his unshaven face. "Take it, and fire it. Or I swear to God Ray, I'll have each one of my boys take turns today babysitting you until you do." Rachel flinched. Her shaking hands reached out to the gun he was holding out for her to take.

"I got to go." Billy's voice calmed down. He kissed her hard on her forehead then turned quickly on his heel. Joe took a step forward throwing his arms in the air. He took his defeat before speaking a word to Billy. Joe watched his brother speed from the empty lot, shooting clouds of dirt around them. He turned to Rachel shooting her a glare.

"You better, and I mean this Rachel, you better shoot that damn thing." Joe pointed hard at the gun. Rachel rubbed her temples and squeezed her eyes shut tight. She wasn't a gun slinger. She wasn't brave or even eager to know this world. But here she was, holding a gun. A gun that most likely was responsible for peoples pain, or worse.

"You know what Ray," Joe walked over to her, ripping the gun from her hand. "Fuck it. Don't learn. Who cares." Joe shoved the gun in his waistband and took a step closer to her. "The next time some jerk off gets you in a dark alley and pushes you up against a wall," his voice was low and hot against her face. Shivers of a different emotion barreled down her back. "Just maybe they'll get what they came for. Maybe next time, Syn will get what he obviously wants."

It was like getting slapped in the face, the reality of what he was saying. This whole time all she could think about was shooting a gun. Doing something she had never done, something she could never see herself doing. But now, those few simple words Joe said put a new view on what Billy was trying to do. Protection. She had already known his intentions were only for protection, but she had never truly _felt _what he was trying to protect her from.

Anger swept over her, spiraling out of control in her body. She could almost feel Syn's hands on her; violating her. She could feel the heat in her face. Feel the anger oozing from her pores. Before her brain could even relay the message to her hand she had snatched the gun from Joes waistband. Holding the gun level with her eyes she took several quick steps to the target.

_Pop_. _Pop_. _Pop_. A deep breath. _Pop_. _Pop_. _Pop_. _Pop_. _Pop_.

Rachel exhaled releasing her chest of the pain she was feeling. She could feel the hot wetness around her eyes again. A relief came over her. Like a huge weight was lifted. Her fingertips tingled, her heart pounded. An excitement was building inside. This feeling was new. It was _exhilarating_.

Slowly sliding back into reality, Rachel turned. Joe's expression would have been priceless, and even humorous, if the situation was different.

"Give me the gun." The words flowed so quickly they almost sounded as one. "Now Rachel. Give it to me. Now." Joe put his palm up and shook his fingers. "Now." Rachel hadn't realized she was shaking until she reached over and placed the gun in Joes hand. His eyes still locked on hers he shoved the gun behind his back. "We're leaving."

* * *

Rachel hadn't completely come down from her high. Her hands were still shaking slightly and tingling for something--maybe the feel of the cold metal against her fingers. She shuddered at the thought. Why should she shudder? Why should she fear the only thing that could protect her when Billy wasn't around. Her life had become unpredictable. Over a year a go she was a simple girl that had lost her mother. Now, a gang lord's girlfriend; a lot had happened over a short amount of time. A lot that she can never take back. A lot she didn't want to take back.

She looked around the rotting bar at faces she never knew, but grew to love. Faces of people not worthy of heaven, but would give their lives for each other. Joe sat next to her, already on his fifth shot. He caught her look and nodded before downing another. She couldn't help but smile. He was her brother. One of her best friends. He loved her, that he had proved. Rachel continued to watch Joe as he lit a cigarette, the liquor he'd been drinking visibly starting to take its effect. Joe's cheeks were flushed, the corner of his mouth curled up.

"Normally when someone learns to shoot, I'm proud. But with you," he blew a long stream of smoke from his lips. His body molding into his seat, he threw his arm over the back of her chair. "…well, with you it just doesn't feel right." His growing smirk faded. "It feels like…" The look on his face was clear he was trying to find the right words. The words he finally spoke caught Rachel off guard. "…it's like, what ever innocence you had left is, gone."

An uncomfortable silence sat thick in the air between them. Rachel looked at him, shock clear in her eyes. _What ever innocence she had left…gone_. Joe sat up, his mouth hung open. He was just as surprised as she was by his words. His brow was creased and Rachel knew he was going to apologize. Before he could speak one word, laughter poured into the bar, along with several people. Joe was the first to look over to the front door. Bodie strolled in singing something to himself. Nicole and Ashlynne right behind him, their faces red from laughter.

Rachel pulled her emotions together. The last thing she wanted was the girls to start asking questions about her sudden depressed state.

She pulled a smile on her lips and turned to her friends. "What the hell took you guys so long?"

"Ask miss, 'it takes ten hours to pick an outfit for this shit hole'." Nicole nodded towards Ashlynne as she sat next to Rachel.

"Hey, listen. I don't care if it's the Hilton, or, well…this shit hole," Ashlynne laughed "I'm going to make sure I look good. You never know if I'm going to meet someone." Bodie sighed with annoyance. He waved to the waitress and barked an order for a bottle of rum. He threw himself back in his chair and lit a cigarette. The table fell silent watching as Bodie's clear anger was being displayed. Ashlynne smirked as she poured a shot into a glass the waitress had just left.

"What the fuck crawled up your ass?" Joe asked.

"Mind your own." Bodie snapped.

"Billy!" Hecco, who had been at the pool table with Spink, hollered towards the door. Rachel and everyone at the table with her turned their heads. The music was louder then it had been when they first arrived and no one heard Billy enter the bar. Jaime and Baggy on his tail. Rachel watched as her boyfriend walked through the bar. Owning every second and every person. Billy's smile took Rachel's breath away as their eyes locked. He bent down kissing her in a way that most likely should have been held in the privacy of his bedroom. Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment and excitement.

"What the hell are you so happy about?" Bodie questioned as he patted Billy on the back. Billy's long frame slid in his seat and melted comfortably next to Rachel.

Billy smirked under the newly lit cigarette that dangled from his lips. "Nights done. I won't have to see that fat bastard for the next few days. What's not to be happy about." All of the men at the table hollered in excitement. Joe grabbed the bottle of rum and poured several shots. After every shot was finished Billy looked over at Rachel.

"…and I'm proud that my girl here can now defend herself when I'm not around." Rachel's eyes widened. Billy's arm was tight around her shoulders, his face nestled in the base of her neck. He kissed her until he reached her ear. "I'll show you how proud tonight." His low voice vibrated her ear and she shivered. Her reaction wasn't of how his voice sounded, but from the reaction she was soon to get from her friends.

"What's he talking about?" Nicole asked placing her glass down from the second shot she swallowed.

"Nothing." Rachel replied quickly.

"No, its not nothing." Billy snapped. He pulled his arm away and placed his elbows on the table and leaned forward, closer to Nicole. A small smile crept on his lips. "I had your man teach her how to shoot a few rounds."

"You did what?" Ashlynne's voice rose over the music. The few people that were in the bar that Rachel didn't recognize turned to see what the commotion was.

"Keep your voice down." Rachel ordered. "It's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal," Ashlynne repeated. Lowering her voice she leaned forward. "Now your shooting damn guns. Dammit Ray, what the fuck has happened to you?"

"Watch your fucking mouth. I don't give a shit how long you've known her, you watch your God damn tone when you speak to my girl, or I'll drag you the fuck out of here." Billy said through clenched teeth. He pointed a finger at her face making Ashlynne flinch.

"Hey!" Bodie yelled, jolting to his feet. "Back the fuck up dude." He bellowed. Everyone's attention was on Bodie now. His eyes burnt through Billy's; Billy's burning back. Bodie's allegiance to Billy had never been tested. Had never been tilted a fraction making Billy guess where he stood. But at this moment, Billy was second guessing. Not so much his loyalty. More his, respect.

"Your getting awfully defensive over a fucking skirt?" Billy's voice was steady and calm. Rachel looked over at Ashlynne. Her mouth was in a small o. She looked down at her fingers and started picking at her nails. Something Rachel knew she did when she was nervous about something.

When Bodie realized what he had done he sat down. He laughed an uncomfortable laugh and poured himself and Billy a shot. "I was only fucking with you dog." Billy looked over at Ashlynne and back at Bodie.

"So, this is the girl you've been boning." Ashlynne's head snapped up. Her eyes squinted at Billy.

"Boning?" Ashlynne sounded insulted. Rachel put her hand over her mouth to hide her smile. This had explained a lot. "I'm not some slut that gave my shit up to him since I've been here. Our _relationship _started back home." Bodie closed his eyes and shook his head. Rachel's eyes widened again. Billy was going to catch what she said and start asking questions. She needed to stop this conversation before it escaladed into a fight.

"Relationship?" Billy asked. "What the fuck do you mean back home?"

"You know what," Rachel turned her body to face Billy. She grabbed his tightened jaw and pulled his face to meet hers. "I want to leave." She said softly. She looked at him with want in her eyes; her lips curled up in the corners. His eyes were hard and he was breathing heavy. She didn't know if what she was doing was going to work, but she had to try. If he found out about Bodie going to California to get Rachel, Bodie's ass wouldn't be the only one on the line.

"Please. You can show me how proud you are." She could see the softening in his eyes and thanked God a million times over. Billy smirked as he pulled himself from the seat. Rachel followed hoping to get him out of the bar before anything else was said. Suddenly he stopped walking and turned back to Bodie.

"This conversation isn't over." Rachel cursed to herself. Billy grabbed her hand and left the bar.

"Nice going." Nicole said to Ashlynne.

"I'm sorry, but he was implying something. It just slipped, ok." Ashlynne sunk in her seat. She prayed Rachel would get him to forget about the whole conversation.

"Fuck." Bodie yelled before dropping his head to the table.

* * *

Billy's sigh was long and exaggerated as he looked around the abandoned under pass. Graffiti of little art covered every decrepit cement wall. He had been lying on the same car Rachel had used for target practice just a few days before. Getting impatient he sat up, giving himself a better view of the garbage and burnt cars around him.

The night was slow; customers most likely already high. Sleep and Rachel were the only things his mind was set on for the rest of his night. It was almost two in the morning and closing shop seemed like a good idea. When a car crept into view, he was pissed. He jumped off the car, heavy squeaking and cracking echoed against the walls; his boots smashing the gravel below. His hand shot up to his face covering the beaming lights from his eyes.

"Hey, asshole." Billy growled. Everyone knew to shut their beams off before they reached the road. Less attention. "Turn those damn lights off." Now able to see Billy blinked several times trying to rid himself of those annoying spots on his eyes. Finally able to focus he could see the silhouettes of two people. Neither moved. Billy stood straight, glaring at the car less then a hundred feet away. _What the hell is this shit_.

"Don't know what you're here for, but you better turn your car around and leave." Billy ordered. Still no movement. Something wasn't right about this. Billy took a few steps over to where he kept his supply. The brown bag sat, slumped loosely over an old generator. Billy noticed it was hidden from the cars view. Without hesitation he knocked the bag to the floor, getting caught between the car and the generator. He turned himself around and started to walk.

"Have a nice night." He saluted the car as he stalked past it, a smirk on his lips. He looked over from the corner of his eye. He didn't recognize the passenger, and still couldn't see the driver.

Billy was almost to the road when he heard the dull squeak of a car door opening. "D-Don't leave!" The voice was unfamiliar to him. Familiarity was an important part of his job. He stopped walking and turned. The passenger was standing outside the car scratching at his arms. Definite crack head. "P-p-please," The man continued. Billy's eyes swept the darkness around them, looking for any sign of trouble. When he felt satisfied enough he walked back to his selling spot.

"What do you want?" Billy grabbed a cigarette from his pocket, lighting it with his eyes still glued to the man.

"I-I n-need a fix." Scratching hard the man sniffed. He wiped his nose with dirty fingers.

"Who sent you here?"

"W-what?" The man looked around nervously. His hair was oily, his face bruised and dried dirt patched his cheeks and forehead.

"I said, who the fuck sent you here?" Billy was getting heated. He was getting bad feelings about this guy. But then again, crack heads always gave him a bad feeling.

"W-who sent me h-here." he repeated to himself. "Oh-oh, D-Damien." The man smiled proud at himself that he remembered something. His unwashed teeth made Billy cringe.

"Damien, huh?" Damien was a regular and a good friend. If this man knew Damien, he had to be legit. "What's your name?"

"G-Greg."

"Well Greg," Billy pulled another cigarette from his pocket and lit it. He handed the lit cigarette over to the man. With a shaky hand he accepted. "If you say you know Damien, then lets get to business." Billy walked past the man, looking him up and down as he past. "You sure you have money?" Billy snorted.

"S-sure." Greg followed Billy looking back at the car every few seconds. Billy noticed this.

"Who's your friend?" Billy nodded to the car.

"That's n-nobody."

"Nobody huh." Before Billy touched the bag he looked back at the car. "Tell that nobody to show himself." Greg's eyes widened but turned and waved at the car. Billy could see the door open with hesitation. Another man, around Greg's height climbed out. He looked around with the same nervousness as Greg. When he met Billy's eyes he took a deep breath.

"Who are you?" He pointed at the man.

"Hey listen. I don't want to be here any longer then I have to. Can you hurry this up?" The man said looking around again.

"Who. Are. You?" Billy was loosing whatever cool he had left. He wasn't going to be pulled into a set up, if this was in fact one.

"Derek. My name is Derek ok. Greg's my cousin."

"Are you a cop?"

"A cop! Are you insane?"

"I said are you a fucking cop!" Billy bellowed. His growl echoed making the man jump.

"No, I'm not a cop. I'm just a stupid asshole who let himself get suckered into helping someone who can't help himself." He spat.

"Get the fuck back in your car." He ordered the man. The man shook his head annoyed, but did what he was told.

"Next time Greg," Billy handed Greg a bag filled with white powder. "Don't bring your cousin." Greg reached deep in his back pocket, scrambling for money. The quick sound of a gun being cocked pulled Billy's attention to Greg's face. Instead of a face, he was staring down the barrel of a gun.

"Won't be a next time Billy boy." Billy took a step back.

"What the fuck is this?" Billy said raising his hands up.

"This is you getting arrested." Greg hollered. In that moment two police cruisers flew up the gravel stopping short only a few feet from Billy. Four uniformed cops pointed their guns at Billy yelling for him not to move.

"He said he wasn't a cop." Billy stated to Greg.

"He isn't a cop. But I am. Now put your hands behind your back." Greg grabbed Billy's arms slamming him over the hood of Rachel's target. He could feel the cold handcuffs put forcefully around his wrists. The snap of the cuffs closing was deafening.

"William Darley, you are under arrest."


	22. Chapter 22

"You got a choice, Darley." The man leaned over the table, his fat fingers spread over the pressed wood. His graying hair was thinning and combed neatly over the top of his head. A small coffee stain circled the third button of his white collard shirt, and he smelt of stale pastries. "We can do this the easy way or the hard way."

"I prefer the hard way." The other man said as he leaned his large frame against the only exit from the sweltering room. His arms were crossed tightly over his broad chest. His voice deep and menacing. The good cop bad cop routine was running dry. Now the two detectives were left with only one option. Threats.

Billy had been sitting in the same seat for hours. His personal items were gone. Packed away in a brown paper bag somewhere. Two packs of fresh cigarettes, a lighter, and a Styrofoam cup filled half way with water sat in front of him. He leaned over and grabbed the opened pack and with calm fingers, pulling a stick from the box and placing it in his mouth. He lit, inhaled and exhaled. The whole time his eyes were on the overweight, underpaid enforcer of the law that stood before him.

"You're going away, Billy. You might as well start talking. Tell us what you know." The broad detective barked.

"Will I get put on the payroll for doing your job?" Billy said, coolly. The corner of his mouth curling up.

"Listen you little prick. We eat punks like you for breakfast." The detective leaning toward Billy grew closer. His hands only a foot from Billy's.

"I can tell." Billy nodded towards the detective's large stomach that fell over his belt. "I thought cops were supposed to be healthy and fit. You know, so they can chase the bad guys."

"You fuckin' smart ass." The detective against the door lunged across the room at Billy, his large hands clutching onto Billy's shirt. Without much effort he had Billy against the wall, the chair he had been occupying crashed to the floor. "You keep this smart talk up and you're gonna be doin' some serious time Darley. You better start fuckin' participating or we won't be able to help you."

"Help me?" Billy laughed. "Your asking me to be a fuckin' rat, how the fuck is that helping me?"

"You scratch our backs, we'll scratch yours." The detective's hot breath brushed Billy's face.

"No thank you. I don't want fuckin' flees." The detectives arm pulled back. A smirk stayed on Billy's face, he didn't have time to protect himself from the blow of the detective's fist as it connected to his stomach. Losing his breath, he fell to the floor, his arms wrapped tight around himself. Gasping for air he pulled himself into fetal position. The top of his belly burned and throbbed as he coughed. The wind had been completely knocked from him.

The two detectives laughed at Billy's expense. The broad detective knelt down, bending his head only inches from Billy's. He could feel the smile across the detectives face as he got even closer to him. His hot breathe scorched the top of Billy's ear, causing Billy to move his head. With that the detective placed his knee on top of Billy's side, keeping him in place.

"You're gonna tell us what we wanna know." he laughed. "Or.." the detective looked over to his partner and shrugged. Still smiling he bent closer to Billy again. "Or, we can pay a visit to that pretty little piece of ass you've been bangin'."

Billy's heart pounded, but his breathing stopped. His whole body froze, tensing under the weight of the detective. Billy could feel the heat rising up his neck and pouring across his face and head. In his mind he grabbed the detective by the throat and slammed him to the floor just before killing him with his own gun. But he knew that the end result would lead him to jail forever. Never to be with Rachel again.

He refused to have that.

"Go fuck yourself." Billy barely breathed the words as he tried to make his way from under the detective's knee.

"This prick isn't gonna budge." The detective with the stain on his shirt barked. "I'm done playing his game." The broad detective knelt down closer to Billy again.

"Have fun in county." Before rising to his feet the detective gave him one last punch to the gut. Losing his breath again, this time Billy laughed. He wasn't entirely sure why he was laughing, but he couldn't stop. The detective watched him with puzzled eyes as he made his way to his feet.

"Just like your father." The detective hissed before leaving Billy to his thoughts. And the thought of what Billy just heard caused his laughing to slowly decease. He lay on the floor, his hands in fists over his belly, and his eyes slowly glistening. He _was _just like his father. He knew that. And he hated his father.

Syn's tattooed fist slammed on the steel door as he cursed under his breath. He knew she was home. He watched her in her tight black mini skirt and white halter top as she staggered into the front doors of her building. He was going to stop her right then but he didn't want to bring any unwanted attention to himself from her neighbors. Waiting a good ten minutes before getting out of his car, he made his way into the building and up the stairs to the fourth floor where he knew Jessica's apartment was.

Anger was creeping up his neck and he was seconds away from losing it. Patience was something he knew nothing about. Balling his hand into a fist he pounded relentlessly against her door. This time he could hear movement and someone cursing as they got closer.

A man no taller than himself ripped open the door. His hair was disheveled, his face unshaven. He was shirtless, wearing only a pair of stained boxers. He looked heavy at Syn, his blue eyes burning deep into Syn's brown ones.

"What the hell do you want?" He hissed through clenched teeth, taking a step closer.

"I want Jessica, you dirty, smelly prick." Syn said coolly. "Now I suggest you get your skanky ass back in there and tell her to get her _fine _ass out here. Before I come in and get her myself." Syn crossed his arms over his chest as he smirked at the man. He looked shocked, and a little insulted. Syn didn't care. He dared him to question him. And that's exactly what he did.

"Who the _hell _do you think you are?" the man asked, pointing a dirty finger at Syn.

Syn sighed heavy before he rolled his head around his shoulder. "I'll tell you who I am." Just then Syn smashed the moronic man in the nose with his forehead, causing the man to grab at his face and lose his balance. Syn walked passed the man, knocking him to the floor as he did.

"Jessica," Syn sang. "Where are you?"

"Chris, what the hell is taking you so long?" He could hear Jessica call from the bedroom. Syn's lips curled into a sinister smile as he walked down the hall to where Jessica was. When he made it to the open door where he could see Jessica sprawled out on her bed. He stopped and leaned himself against the door frame. She was completely naked, and from the looks of it, tired of waiting for Chris.

"Too bad I left my phone in the car. This would be a _beautiful _wallpaper." Syn's voice was menacing. Jessica, not recognizing the voice jumped up. When her eyes met Syn's she screamed and scrambled to gather the sheets to cover herself.

"Who the fuck are you?" She screamed. "Where's Chris?"

"Oh him?" He started as he walked into her room. "He's taking care of a broken face right now."

"Get out!" She pulled herself closer to the head board. "What do you want?"

"Yes, to the point. I like that in a girl." He made his way over to her bed and sat on the side she was on." He reached a hand up to her dark hair, pushing a strand out of her face. "I have a proposition for you." She backed away as his hand touched her face. Her eyes full of concern as they looked back at him.

" Who are you?"

"Oh, how rude of me. The name's Syn." He put his hand out for her to shake. She didn't buy his politeness. Syn laughed knowing she wouldn't fall for it. Putting his hand down he decided to just get to the point. "Ok. Let's just say, we can help each other." Her brows narrowed.

"Oh?" She said.

"I want Billy Darley's head on a platter. The best way to do that is to get to his pretty little girlfriend." Syn could see the change in Jessica's expression as he mentioned Rachel. If fire could come out of a person's eyes, he was sure that hers would be perturbing flames right now.

"What does this have to do with me?" Jessica's body loosened a little more as her interest in what Syn had to say became clearer.

Syn rose off the bed and started to walk around Jessica's room. His eyes scanned the knickknacks she had as he started his plan. "Rachel is his weakness. Everything about her. From her face, to her body and most importantly, her safety. I need to use her to get to him. As bait." Syn stopped and picked a bra up from the floor and smelt it. "Mm. I love the smell of a real woman." He flung the bra back on the floor before focusing his attention back on Jessica.

"What exactly do you need from me, Syn?" His name escaped her lips in soft sultry tone.

"I need you to get her to me." His palms rested on the end of her bed as he leaned in closer. "Once I have my hands on her, I have complete control."

"I hate to disappoint you, but there is no way that girl will come anywhere I am. She hates me, even the idea of me. I doubt she would even get on the phone." Not caring anymore about covering herself, Jessica stood up and dropped the sheet that was her only protection against Syn's eyes on her naked body. She walked passed him to her dresser where she grabbed a long t-shirt. Placing it on she turned to face him again, who was now slowly walking towards her.

"You're a daring girl, Jessica. I know all about you." His voice was steady and low. His eyes scanning her curves that could be seen through the thin fabric. "I doubt you would have a problem contacting Rachel."

Jessica waved a hand at Syn. "Don't say her name. It makes me ill."

"Because she's the love of Billy's life, I'm sure." Syn was only and inch from Jessica's face.

"That isn't the only reason." Her honesty to this stranger was surprising to her. "Speaking of Billy. If I get you Rachel, then you get Billy. What if I don't want to help? I know who you are Syn. Took a second to realize, but I have heard of you. You'll take his life without a second thought." Her eyes burnt into his.

Rubbing her cheek softly with his fingers he leaned in to her neck, his breath soft on her ear as he spoke. "Why have Billy, when you could be with someone so much better? Someone to make you feel," his hand dropped down to her chest than slowly moved to her stomach where his hand continued to fall, "so much better."

Jessica lost her breath as her eyes slowly rolled to the feel on his hand. His offer was promising, his voice and touch made her want him. But the fact was there was no other Billy. No one could ever compare in her mind. She decided at that moment to help him. Help him help her. She would get Rachel out of the picture, but warn Billy of Syn's intensions before it was too late.

As Syn's hands touched her most delicate parts, his mouth found her neck. She sighed throwing her head back giving him better access. "I'm in," she said breathlessly.

"So am I." Syn whispered. She could feel his smirk against her neck.

Rachel stared at Billy from across the table through blood shot eyes. She had been crying the entire ride to the county jail. Billy's head was in his hands as they sat. Silence, thick between them. He told her not to come. His sentence was minimal. His lawyer one of the best in Boston, got him a four month deal. He had done longer in the past. Something he never told Rachel about.

"I don't understand why you came. We could have talked on the phone until I got home." His voice sounding muffled as he kept his head down.

"Because maybe _you _could stand not seeing me for four months, but _I_ couldn't last that long not seeing you. I get this stuff comes easy to you, but it's new to me." Rachel could feel the warmth of the fresh tears that formed. She blinked trying to rid them before Billy looked up.

"This isn't a place for you. I don't want you to come back." His head still down as he spoke. It pained him to look in her eyes. To see the hurt and fear that beamed from them.

"I waited as long as I could. I tried Billy. Almost three months I sat not being able to see you or touch you. I just couldn't do it anymore. I'm sorry." Billy looked up at her. She quickly wiped away the tears that had fallen fresh down her reddened cheeks. She looked beautiful, and he wondered how he had become so lucky. After everything, after all the pain he had caused her, here she was. His angel. Sitting in a dirty old gym, now used for visiting with thirty other inmates and their visitors.

Billy sighed as he rubbed his head and leaned into his chair. "Has Bode been doing his job?"

"If you mean babysitting me, yes." She wiped away the rest of the wetness from her cheeks.

"It's not babysitting, Ray. He's doing what I can't. Protecting you. People know I'm in here. Anyone would jump at the chance to get to Billy Darley's girl while he's gone." He sighed again.

Rachel's eyes scanned his face as she leaned a little closer. "You look good. You know, considering." She gave him a weak smile.

Billy smirked at her as he leaned foreword. "You look beautiful. _Considering_." Rachel couldn't help but smile. She missed him more than she had ever missed him before. Seeing him look back at her right now, a small delicate smile across his lips, made missing him so much harder. The pain of the emptiness she felt, that much worse.

She didn't want to cry anymore. She didn't want the little time she had with him to be wasted on tears. Slowly she reached out a hand and placed it over his. The moment their skin touched, his eyes closed. Taking a deep breath taken through his nose, he tried to compose himself. When he opened his eyes again she was staring at him, a pleasant smile across her lips.

That was the look he wished he could keep on her face at all times. Her cheeks slightly flushed, her eyes glazed over with happiness. His own eyes looked quickly around the room they were in. The smell of filth leaked into his nostrils. Filth of all kinds spread across the entire room. His heart felt like it was breaking into small pieces as he looked back over to her. He was a failure. A failure with an angel smiling at him.

The look of defeat must have been clear across his face, because Rachel squeezed his hand.

"Billy." Rachel's voice was soft and her expression changed from happy to concerned. Billy sat up and cleared his throat. He crossed his arms quickly over his chest and glared around the room. He needed to stay strong. He needed to keep up who he was. What everyone in here knew him as. This was no place for weakness. Rachel held her breath trying to compose herself. This is how it always was with him. One minute she looked at him with so much love and could even feel his affection without him doing anything other then giving her one of his amazing smiles. Then next second, he was stone. Cold, hard and impossible to penetrate. A voice crackled over one of the speakers over their heads. Time was up.

Billy rose to his feet first, reaching a hand out to Rachel.

"I love you." That was all he could say before two guards stepped next to Billy, eyeing him. Rachel couldn't bear to watch these men take him away. She told him she loved him too, turning before the last word even left her lips.

Quickly she walked to the door where they were letting the visitors leave. Her back to her boyfriend, to the things she wished she could walk away from.


End file.
